Marry Yourself - Japan's Lonely Women | Journal Reporters

she's had this dream since she was a little girl - one day wear a wedding gown Oh hold on busy now that dreams come true today Haruna my is a bride but where's the groom it turns out there isn't one Haruna is having what's known as a solo wedding and that's possible thanks to a special agency that offers a two-day solo wedding package today the bride is fitted for a dress tomorrow there's an elaborate photoshoot in the night I won't be able to sleep tonight because I'll be too excited about the big day tomorrow Harouna lives in tokyo now 37 she's been looking for a husband for years there are plenty of potential partners out there Japan is a society of singles no partner no children that's a terrible thought for Haruna and it's why she's invested a big chunk of her income in dating services today she's off to a botch con a matchmaking party completes with a master of ceremonies now make sure you assert yourselves out there and share a toast with everybody especially you men out there now is everybody ready Cheers Karuna has two hours to meet as many men as possible not exactly relaxing but efficiency is everything in Japan where people work more than they play why are there so many single people in Japan we just want to do our thing and spend more time on our own I think people are becoming more independent and there are things they'd like to pursue we'd like to find partners but we don't want to lose our freedom it's not like we can't find someone it's more like we don't want to Haruna and the man exchanged digital calling cards but that doesn't mean much in Japan it's often done out of politeness rather than interest Haruna is getting tired of it she says the men often don't want to commit but she stays for a drink anyway the men here don't impress her she says many can't deal with self-confident women they want to act macho but are actually really shy and even a bar employees efforts at matchmaking proved futile folio limo Coonan we've been organizing these parties for nine and a half years our intention is to provide a place for everyone to meet and to find a partner somebody compatible for a great relationship like any buckle much better but you hold on Japan has a very low birth rate and a high elderly population I hope that couples will meet here and then have kids but nothing clicked for Harouna today like it was more fun than I expected no one caught her fancy sticking out on Sato you know but that's okay ma panel sumatera i'ma I had fun anyway named Kanto Oh a mastaba the next morning Harouna meets her older sister Erica to go for a walk erica has already been through everything Haruna wishes for she married and had a child but now she's divorced Tony Sirico for nan da roca no Soto is shown ichiraku so really you need to find someone you can feel comfortable with someone who's like err where everything feels natural if it doesn't it's not going to last what's a gun IMM ma thought she got to look this so your ex-husband wasn't like Eric yeah I know are you kidding he's not even close to air marriage is the start of something but it takes some serious work I got out the weather I go she ate a cake a night that cake oh god this what's with you dude I was married and I can say that marriage isn't everything I got married I got divorced but I have a child and I don't regret any of it I said I got the authority especially because of my child I feel that I need to do my best and grow as a person aho Athos there nobody could own orthotic about there if there's one thing who Runa knows she wants it's to be true to herself but that doesn't prevent her from seeking a little extra help so she consults a fortune-teller that's not unusual in Japan Harouna thinks it may be her fate to remain single but she'd like to know for certain so she's having her fortune told all day hmm thanks to her solo wedding chip she'll know what it's like to be a bride even without a groom hmm model a topo I don't see any indication of marriage in the near future but there's definitely a chance of meeting somebody important and what if this important somebody is really Harouna herself because that's what the solo wedding is all about to embark on this journey of self-discovery Harouna takes step on a train to Kyoto that's where the agency that came up with this special service is located Haruna's first stop is a bridal shop just outside of the city center she tries on one dress after another for a short time she'll be a princess even if she doesn't have a prince you comb this sleeveless dress it's really quite nice isn't it all the problems of finding a husband seemed to have vanished her white wedding childhood dream is finally coming true the solo wedding will cost her una 300,000 yen which is roughly 2,300 euros that's a lot of money for her but a bargain compared to the price of a real wedding Harouna is really enjoying herself and she knows exactly which dress she wants agency representative Natsume Akai is always on hand it's brand new and there's something beautiful on the back she's picked out her wedding dress now the agent takes her Oona to the next stop on the schedule it was Natsume acai who came up with the idea for the service because she too wanted to wear a wedding dress at least once in her life Harouna picks out the flowers for a bouquet herself she's not bothered about the absence of a groom she's finally doing something nice just for herself tamales get a colossal tickets for me this is the perfect time and age I don't have to wait to wear a wedding dress I can wear it now and now it's most important all to Lala as for partners I don't really feel it's necessary to have one then uncle it's good like a opposite it's not like if I don't find someone before I die my soul will remain on earth the agency's struck a nerve with it's solo wedding package being alone is not the same as being lonely says the head of the agency that's that's wrong kissed it we've not seen or experienced anyone being sad nowhere near it I do understand how someone might feel that way but we've never actually encountered it sea salt a staccato moan I know dead the next morning Haruna's made up for her photo shoot for her this is more important than marriage itself most of the clients booked their solo wedding package shortly before their 30th or 40th birthday better to take matters into their own hands than wait for a man on the way to the highlights of the trip in the taxi Limousine instead of a bridegroom Harouna sits next to the wedding trip planner great thank you so much I always look good always up above Kyoto's rooftops the perfect setting for what is often the most precious picture in a woman's life Harouna has reached her goal she enjoys every second of the shoot even though it's pretty strenuous well it's aruna can you look this way which way I feel like my eyes are going every which way with every camera click Harouna is showered with praise and compliments they help boost her self-confidence chorim Oh nononono see a poly tokidoki so sing me the no skin on multi it's something I'll treasure I like to look at pictures so when I'm tired I'll look at myself and say oh this is really beautiful and that'll cheer me up I'll use it as a way to get myself motivated Oh mom what does this get the thumb in all no it slips it all on this one man Haruna didn't find a husband on this trip but she did get to know herself a little better

Channel: DW News

Views: 441,264

Rating: 4.6557679 out of 5

Keywords: Japan, Kyoto, marriage, agency, Haruna, journal reporters, dw, deutsche welle

Id: g82Eu8oER_Q

Length: 12min 12sec (732 seconds)

Published: Sat Apr 11 2015

Reddit Comments

[u/[deleted]]

That guy...

We're totally fine being single, it's not that we can't find someone, it's more like we don't want to!

Yet he is at a dating convention..?

This clip seemed to highlight a serious sense of denial in these people, it almost oozes out of them, it's not independence at all.. they contradict themselves a lot throughout the video. At one time trying to persuade the camera (or themselves) that they are happy being single, but at the same time cursing the men for (reading between the lines) only wanting sex and not a relationship. She clearly just has a terrible personality and is being forced to deal with that.. but instead of trying to change she is too stubborn and would rather blame society/men or go into complete denial and say she is happy being single.

The bridal service employee said "we never see any sad people, they all seem very happy", but I wonder what happens when they go home at night. Obviously they will be happy being pampered.

[u/azureknightmare]

Haruna needs to step her game up. You have to walk before you can run, right? So she's trying to get married before even meeting a guy? She's asking for committment while exchanging email addresses? Really?

Just find a guy and start dating and if it goes the marriage route, great. If not, oh well, onto the next step. It felt like she was trying to hit the finish line without actually running the race.

[u/kumatech]

I see it all the time, so sad some here look physically and emotionally great. I understand that changes with time. However, I am curious if the older (in terms of age) are not married for some specific reason. In the south, back in the US, they state that she's over 30 and has no kids something is wrong with her. Would that still apply here?I understand that anyone over the age of 30 in the city is considered old if they are woman.I apply that only two Japanese men and their perspective view on the matter.