Madeleine Kerzner's Story

well I was always dancing and singing my mom had sent me to dance when I was 3 years old and I did modeling from the six months old so I had a contract with Marks and Spencers I grew up in that atmosphere of cameras staged everything my mom and dad both having Jewish backgrounds but my dad's background was kind of the one that sort of impacted me the most because he was a Kindertransport young man he was rescued when he was 10 from Vienna my dad really was very angry with God we're from a from family so very strictly Orthodox not just although strictly Orthodox and he really rejected everything so I was in music when I was 16 in the band and I met Phil in it from Thin Lizzy when I was 17 and he became a mentor and someone who greatly respected and he really helped me with songwriting he helped me to understand that music can actually be very political they may not listen to you there's a 16 year old girl but they'll listen to the song so I realized there was a great power in music from a very young age I was in a rock band rock punk band and I was like I say 16 when I began 17 when I got really serious and about 8 in half when I got signed so really wanted to take me out to America my drama was the drama from the cult and Mark who was the bass player went on to form Thunder rock band but these were all my band members and we kind of all kind of work together I really was very thankful but being one of the really few female rock singers in the industry I knew the what world was a bit strange remember going to an Iron Maiden party Bruce's house so many occult things everywhere and strange things everywhere and I what they were really doing you know and I realized most people were singing about the devil or having were these very dark things and the Masonic things and they were around us everywhere and for some reason when we traveled you'd have people's are on the which I'm a warlock I'm a wizard or whatever and it was normal it was like they were part of the industry they were part of everything where we were no matter where we were and as I grew up I kept thinking to myself I don't really believe in what they're doing and I didn't take it serious and I think that's probably my protection was I didn't want to go down that road but did it affect me of course it did because it was around me before very long the drugs really took over I began to a very party like way that partying was now more important than the music so to me I was in a world that I really found very overwhelming I didn't like it and the more I got into it I was like this is a crazy place but I actually didn't realize I got to a place in that world what I couldn't get out I didn't know how to get out I was really locked in I was locked in on the drugs I was locked in I wasn't tired I was an addict but I smoked marijuana every day I drank I did whatever I wanted you know you had a management company taking you to rehearsals in a limo it all looked amazing but I've never felt so empty in my entire life and I could sense that something really wrong was going around me there was an account I had with a Satanist who was a musician friend of mine I never forget it because it was a strange thing that I said he and I picked up this cross I said why are you wearing it even across when you don't even believe and it's upside down and he said to me don't mess with this and I said don't doesn't frighten me the God of Israel will deal with you head-on and I remember walking away thinking yeah the God of Israel is the God of Israel he's the god of of it all so I realized there was faith in me there was something burning in me but I didn't know where it was leading so because I come to such a crucial crossroads classic rock and roll crossroads in my life the question in my heart really was Jesus are you who you really said you are because if you are it would change everything in my life I now was really searching for an answer about life itself because it all felt empty Hollow the food didn't taste well I was living this what looked like an amazing life yet it had no satisfaction at all and I got to the place where I actually thought I was going to die I could hear so many different spiritual things all those things of the occult that I'd seen became very very real in my life and without going into it in full I then just got on a plane and I went home and I left the band I left everything and went home to London and I felt very confused because I knew I'd walked away from everything that I'd done for the last five seven years I decided to meet a friend of mine from light of the world bass player at the leisure center in Tottenham and just said you know let's meet up we haven't seen each other for a long time I just got back from New York and I heard this sound of music another really unusual sound and he was really late never turned up and waiting in the reception area and I somebody just said you want to go in and have a listen so I thought okay let's go in and have a listen and I went in and I realized suddenly I'm in a church and I would never have walked into a church just wouldn't have been me but it was an African church so the sound of their music was so intriguing to me there's a beautiful sound I was enjoying the music and then suddenly from nowhere i sat at the back and I wanted to leave and I couldn't get out my chair I sound stranger but I had smoked marijuana that day so I was thinking I think I'm really high and I've got suddenly gone all dizzy and weird but I can also all I can say is the whole room just disappeared everything just disappeared and an amazing piece just came over my head over my body and as I sat in the chair I've never felt such a piece in my life and in that moment I heard a voice speak directly into my being it's like into my DNA and he just said Madeleine I am who I said I am and in that moment I just knew I was talking to you sure I was talking to Jesus and I remember sitting there saying you are our Messiah and he said I am who I said I am I just began to cry and I was like well I've sinned oh no it was you and suddenly the room began to fade back a little bit and I heard because the preacher had now come on I now had realize I'm sitting in a church but I'm having all this experience at the same time and suddenly this man says does anyone need Jesus and I literally saw myself jump out of the chair and run to the front I didn't even know to run to the front but I just run to the front I did the prayer with the preacher I don't know what anyone was saying to me somebody gave me papers that give me your address I gave them the address but I'm still overwhelmed but as I began to leave the place this peace came over me and I felt felt like my sins have been forgiven but this terrible sorrow hit me immediately you mean we didn't understand who you were my Jewish roots began to become so strong and the pain and I began to cry and cry that we had rejected him that we had not understood who he was and that was a really big thing for me in the first week of my salvation is even trying to deal and reconcile with my Jewishness and understanding how we had rejected our own Messiah and God really had to send me a lot of help to get me to see that I couldn't take it all on the way that I was and then I had this moment where I was like you know logic starts to come back in you know you start to land well I'm not gonna do I can't go to church it was ridiculous me go to church it's not possible I began to Synanon and even if you're the Messiah I'm not ready I can't do this and suddenly a voice which was a different voice was very Stern Stern like I was actually afraid like the fear of God came on me said Madeline if you do not choose life I will lose you and in that moment I realized I don't have an option here God is sort of saying to me you've got to turn away from this life or he will lose me so a lot of people speak about God's love or God's love is there but sometimes we need to know about the danger of rejecting God so I understand that we can actually be lost so it's in that moment I says well I didn't want to die I felt like I was gonna you know I could really tell something very terrible we have happened so I said okay what do I do and that morning a letter came through the door and the church that I had gone to had written me let's say these are our services so I went for a whole month on Thursdays stop smoking through the marijuana away and really I was a totally different person the hunger for knowing who God was was burning knowing who Jesus was knowing who our mushiya was it was so strong and everything in my life really did change but what I never really understood till maybe later on was I had come out of an account of our environment where so many dark things were happening around me whether I understood or didn't it didn't really matter I was in it well what was amazing as my church knew exactly how to do with witchcraft in the occult because in Africa they know exactly when you get saved how to deal with that so from a very early time in my Christianity I learnt how to sever things actually threw everything away I took all my jackets my thing I think I went a bit far because I wanted to sever any contacts I remember there was a particular jacket that I toured with I remember every time I saw this jacket I would see horrible things like really horrible things and everything so it was in my wardrobe and I remember one does I need to get rid of this jacket so I took this jacket and put it in a bag a night and I threw it away so I realized there are things and around us are on us they need to be disconnected and I literally went to Zimbabwe after three months of salvation and I had from living that life I had about four skirts and about five tops and two pairs of shoes left my mum thought I joined a cult because I've thrown everything away but I was the happiest I've ever been in my entire life I was at peace I could sleep and I knew that God had given me a second chance ten years later I was ordained as a pastor in the city of Manchester Here I am a Jewish Celtic Messianic Pentecostal but what happened was after 10 years of pastoring the church I felt God begin to speak to me about who I was very very strongly and I had already really looked at my Jewish roots looked at some of the culture but I felt God said I want you to go back in and really dig deeper so I began to go back into my Jewish culture now of course being in an African Church it seems so irrelevant at the time but I began to get reconnected with in my Jewish community so I then decided to come back to London my father had passed away who by the way came to the Lord because of my salvation so he actually came to the African church he believer in Yeshua got back into my Jewish roots and then I decided right I'm going to learn Hebrew and go back into the depth of my culture not know why I didn't know why I just felt it was helping my preaching it was helping what I was doing it was giving me a much deeper understanding and the longer fit I kind of knew so it was like a refresher but well then I started to delve into the feasts and when I was going back into the feast I can't I sort of got blown away at how much Jesus was so relevant and so especially the Passover but you know so much of the feasts began to blow me away so that's when a totally different journey began and then I also began to teach that Hebraic feast to pastors bishops people who wanted to know and I was quite surprised that a lot of people wanted to know the most amazing thing about the Jewish feasts they're all amazing Tabernacles and supportin but the one blows my mind every time I do it every time I think about it of course is the feast of Passover Pesa now this feast really is Jesus and the sacrifice we see in the book of Exodus how God used this story of a lamb being slain and his blood put upon the door in the shape of a cross amazingly enough so that his people could come out of Egypt to worship Him and when I realized that Jesus took that exact meal and on the day of Passover they went to the upper room to celebrate this meal this is where first communion began this is where can we need to begin and he said this is going to be me a great high priest is our Passover lamb even now if our Jewish community could understand but a lot of people I remember has shown that this Jewish lady comes to me saying to me you know there's a lot about Jesus I can understand you know he's a Jewish man just like we are but what was the cross about why I was there across you know if only you could understand he was our Passover lamb he died for the sins not just of Israel but of the world if we could comprehend that our Passover lamb died our own High Priest our mushiya paid the price for our sins the scales would fall away Jesus in the Passover is the most precious amazing gift that was given to us as human beings on the earth and if there was anything I could say to my Jewish community just understand this was not just a man this was God paying the price for sin for all time you

Channel: CMJ UK

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Length: 15min 31sec (931 seconds)

Published: Wed May 13 2020