Lift Depression With These 3 Prescriptions- Without-Pills | Susan Heitler | TEDxWilmington

depression everyone from time to time fills down psychologists like myself sometimes refer to depression as a common cold of mental illness because it's so common you know and I know that a common cold can make you quite miserable common colds also can develop into sinus infections pneumonia so pay attention when you feel the signs of depression discouraged low-energy self-critical irritable with other people it's important to note oh just as you would if you had a fever something's wrong here I'm just not my usual me once you've noticed that what are your options well unfortunately all too often people assume oh depression is a chemical disorder where do you go if you have a biological disorder you go to your physician what the physicians know how to do they know how to write prescriptions for pills now why do I be mone the fact that 1 out of 10 Americans is taking an antidepressant even worse for women in the middle years the 40s and 50s 1 out of almost 4 Americans are taking antidepressant medication these medications are not sugar pills they can have detrimental impacts on your body they also can make you drug dependent the opioids make you addicted the drug companies say antidepressants don't make you addicted and that's because of the definition of addiction which is includes a craving nobody wakes up and says oh I can't wait to take my antidepressant they don't give you a high they essentially numb you now antidepressant medications do help some people the difficulty is number one there's many people that they don't help then the help about maybe at best sixty percent of the people who take them second there can be serious side effects google antidepressant side effects if you want to scare yourself a little before taking them the good news there's lots of psychotherapy talk therapy methods for getting rid of a Down mood there's lots of prescriptions or techniques without pills for feeling better so today the particular prescription that I'd like to share with you come from my own theory of what makes people feel good and what makes people feel bad when I write books about it I call a conflict resolution theory to remember it in a more easy way let's call it bump therapy here's why you're walking down the road of life maybe you're rushing along the road of life and you hit a bump so at that bump which is some disturbing situation you scratch your head and figure out what to do about it if you're lucky you get what you want and move on tootling on down the rest of your road of life but all too often when we hit a disturbing circumstance we fold we give up on what we want sometimes that's a good idea because they just don't seem to be any other options or if the other option is to get into a fight mmm may not be worth it giving up in response to something you want triggers depression okay this model this bump model tells us what we need to do to feel better here's the bump we've gone into depression back up identify that bump and solve the problem in a new way sounds easy but not quite so easy here's why when you're depressed often you don't know what the bump was there's something about that dark cloud that surrounds you when you're depressed that seems to block you from knowing what you gave up what what what was the hurdle you couldn't overcome so prescription number one will be a technique for pinpointing that problem here's another problem with depression when you're depressed to feel powerless when we feel small and powerless it's pretty hard to think of ideas of what we could do to solve the problem prescription number two pump up I'll show you how in a moment prescription number three now that you know what the problem is the bump and you're feeling strong enough now problem-solve here's an example let's welcome in Julie Julie is a recent actual client in my practice name changed obviously for confidentiality Julie what brings you in here today Julie said well for the last four or five months I've been feeling so down I have no energy I feel so discouraged I am beating myself up all the time and unfortunately I'm irritable with my husband I'm irritable with my kids hmm sounds like depression let's get to work Julie Julie sitting down close your eyes I don't recommend this technique when you're driving by the way truly close your eyes allow an image to come up on your video screen in your mind your visual screen allow an image to come up of someone or something that you might be married someone or something that you might be mad at irritated little peaked or seriously angry not yourself because when you're depressed almost always people feel mad at themselves for this and that notice what comes up on your visual screen Julie thought for a bit and she realized hmm I thought I'd see my husband because I've been barking at him so much but actually what came up was the conference room at work excuse me at work hmm what's disturbing to you there well I work in a large construction company I actually like the company a lot but when we have conferences with myself and the other five project managers I get upset every time I say something the other five were all men ignore me or instead of ignoring me they speak to me like I'm some kind of dummy but and defecate what I say they point out what's wrong I just hate it hmm what do you want in that circumstance I want to be heard I want to be taken seriously ah odds are pretty good we figured out what the bump was for Julie still there's one more question that's important to ask to verify if this is the specific bump causing depression truly as you look again at that conference room who looks bigger you were the other five project managers truly said well that's clear I look like a little girl and they look like big hunky football player now in fact Julie said they're just kind of ordinary guys they're not in reality all that big but when I'm thinking about them right now I picture them really big ah now we know for sure that we've identified a depressogenic depression causing moment depression is a disorder of power so if you feel small and the other people or thing or event or whatever looks big ah that's been the bump that's knocked you down we've done prescription number one we've pinpointed the problem prescription number two Julie take a deep breath with each successive breath feel yourself growing bigger stronger taller more powerful how big are you now Julie Julie said I'm almost as big as the guy's good I said you're going in the right direction take some more deep breaths grow bigger taller taller stronger Julie smiled my head is just about to bump the ceiling ah we've accomplished prescription number two pump up prescription number three problem-solve now when you're trying to solve any problem usually you'll start by gathering information about the relevant variables then you can think of creative solutions for what to do about them so I ask truly from that taller position looking down on the other guys what can you see that you couldn't see when you were feeling so small Julie thought for a moment oh my goodness Julie said I think the guys are intimidated by me you know recently I completed a master's degree in construction management so when I go to those meetings I try to contribute by offering ideas from what I've learned maybe I'm even showing off a little bit but when I mention new ideas new ways to tackle problems that have come up they probably feel a little insecure a little bit threatened what else do you notice I notice I'm kind of listening to what I say my voice sounds like a little girl the way I've been feeling even worse Ind such each sentence with a question mark like I'm looking for their approval ah with that additional data Julie what ideas come to mind of what you could do what could you do so that those conferences would be more satisfying so you could get what you want which is to be heard Julie thought and said well my first impulse is to just leave the company and go to a place that respects me more go to a company where their new idea oriented hmm what do you see when you visualize that solution well I see that with these skills I could get a job somewhere else but I actually liked that company it's also very close to my house I have kids at home I don't want to be spending an hour a day in the car so that doesn't feel like a satisfying solution okay the beautiful of one of the beauties of visualization prescriptions is you can try out solutions so Julie let's try a different solution what else comes to mind Julie said hmm if I did this pumping up routine before I went into the meeting I could just aim to speak louder speak more thigh or Tara t'v authoritative Lee speak with confidence like I know what I'm talking about and I'm trying to be helpful to you here visualize what happens then Julie chuckled that guy over there no matter what I do he's not going to listen to me but from this big position I can see that's about him he doesn't listen to anyone I don't need to take that so personally so others though they're paying attention they do seem to be listening to what I say oh so I see I could be a little more humble and patient and say what I'm saying with explanations so they don't feel so threatened that what I'm saying is something they know nothing about hmm how do you feel Julie as you look at that scene truly said huh I feel I still feel big I feel brighter I feel lighter it's like that dark cloud of depression lifted like a fog on a sunny day prescriptions without pills you can use these techniques as well listen back to the video and jot down the specific questions that I asked for each of the three prescriptions that's who written prescription when you feel down remember life is not an endurance contest there's no need to keep suffering use your prescriptions pinpoint the problem pump up and problem-solve so you too can return to the light of well-being thank you you

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 796,357

Rating: 4.4108529 out of 5

Keywords: TEDxTalks, English, United States, Life, Brain, Cause, Change, Choice, Consciousness, Culture, Curiosity, Depression, Emotions, Freedom, Future, Happiness, Health, Identity, Mental health, Psychology, Self, Visualization

Id: _re6AX3Mi4s

Length: 16min 0sec (960 seconds)

Published: Fri Sep 30 2016