<i> ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )</i>
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY, WELCOME BACK! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, FOLKS, MY
FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS A TONY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW
FROM "SPOTLIGHT," "ISLE OF DOGS," AND "RAY DONOVAN." >> SO YOU'RE GOING TO SEE HIM IN
PRISON. >> YEAH. >> TODAY? >> I JUST SAID THAT. >> YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT? >> NOT REALLY. >> DOES SEEING HIM MAKE YOU FEEL
UNCOMFORTABLE? >> I DON'T KNOW. >> YOU'RE ON THE--
>> OKAY, YEAH, YES, SEEING MY FATHER MAKES ME UNCOMFORTABLE. >> SO WHAT CAN YOU DO ABOUT
THAT? >> I DON'T KNOW. >> HOW CAN YOU MAKE YOURSELF
LESS UNCOMFORTABLE? >> YOU TELL ME. THAT'S WHY I'M HERE. >> SO WHY ARE YOU GOING TO SEE
HIM? >> BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME TO. THAT'S-- YOU-- THAT'S WHAT I
THOUGHT YOU SAID THAT IF I---- WORKED SOMETHING OUT WITH MICK
IT WOULD SOMEHOW MAKE MY LIFE BETTER. >> Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME
LIEV SCHREIBER! ♪ ♪ ♪<i>
( APPLAUSE )</i> >> THANK YOU. >> Stephen: WELCOME BACK. NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. >> THANK YOU VERY MUCH. IT'S VERY NICE TO BE HERE. >> Stephen: NOW, I HAVE A
PROBLEM. I WANT TO APOLOGIZE. I THINK THE LAST TIME YOU WERE
HERE I MISPRONOUNCED YOUR NAME BECAUSE I ALWAYS SAID LI-EV, AND
I WAS TOLD TODAY MULTIPLE TIMES BY MULTIPLE PEOPLE THAT I WAS
SAYING IT WRONG. >> YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. MY NAME IS LI-EV. >> Stephen: SO I'M RIGHT, IT'S
LIEV LIKE KIEV. NOT LIEV LIKE KIEV. <i> ( LAUGHTER ).</i> >> WELL, HERE'S THE THING, WHEN
I USED TO TEACH PEOPLE MY NAME-- WELL, AMERICANS, THAT IS--UN,
THE ONLY REFERENCE WE HAVE IN THIS COUNTRY THAT SOUNDS REMOTE
LIKELY MY NAME IS THE DISH, CHICKEN KIEV. >> Stephen: RIGHT. >> SO I WOULD TELL PEOPLE MY
NAME IS LIEV LIKE CHICKEN KIEV, AND THEY WOULD HEAR CHICKEN KIEV
AND SAY LIEV. >> Stephen: HOW MANY PEOPLE
GET IT RIGHT THESE DAYS, LIEV? >> NO ONE HAS EVER GOTTEN IT AS
RIGHT AS YOU, STEPHEN. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: I AM TEMPTED-- I
AM TEMPTED TO END THE INTERVIEW RIGHT THERE. >> ME, TOO. BUT THERE IS ONE MORE PRESSING
QUESTION. >> Stephen: YES? >> IS IT COAL-BERT OR COAL-BARE? >> Stephen: IT'S COAL-BERT. >> THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
HOW DID IT BECOME-- DO YOU HAVE, LIKE, A FRENCH RELATIVE. >> Stephen: DO YOU REALLY
CARE? >> A LITTLE BIT. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
>> Stephen: THAT WOULD BE NO! THAT WOULD BE NO! YOU EITHER CARE OR YOU DON'T. YOU DON'T CARE A LITTLE BIT? >> IT WAS JUST AN EXCUSE FOR YOU
AND I TO SPEAK FRENCH, THAT'S ALL. >> Stephen: MY FAMILY THOUGHT
WE WERE FRENCH BUT WE'RE NOT FRENCH IN ANY WAY. MY FATHER ALWAYS WANTED TO BE
COAL-BARE, BUT HE WAS A JUNIOR, AND HIS FATHER SAID IF YOU CALL
YOURSELF COAL-BARE INSTEAD OF COLBERT, PEOPLE WILL THING YOU
DON'T WANT TO BE MY SON BECAUSE YOU'RE A JUNIOR. >> IS THAT TRUE. >> Stephen: THAT'S A TRUE
STORY. AND WE HAD 11 KIDS AND THEY SAID
YOU CAN BE WHATEVER YOU WANT. WANT. >> AND YOU CHOSE. >> Stephen: I CHOSE COAL-BARE. BECAUSE I INHERITED THE
PRETENTIOUS GENE. >> I DIDN'T WANT TO SAY IT. I WAS GOING TO SAY THE FRENCH
GENE. >> Stephen: WELL, PRETENTIOUS,
FRENCH, IT'S THE SAME THING. IF WE MUST, IF WE HAVE TO, LET'S
GET BACK TO YOU. LAST WEEK YOU WERE PROFILEED IN
THE ""WALL STREET JOURNAL"." AND IT SAID, "LIEV SCHREIBER WAS
BORN TO BE WILD, BUT WITH A PURPOSE." THAT'S GREAT. IT'S A GREAT TITLE. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? >> I DON'T KNOW. I WAS GOING TO ASK YOU. WHAT IS "WILD WITH A PURPOSE"? I MEAN, THERE'S WILD, LIKE, IF
YOU'RE A MUIR CAT IT'S APPROPRIATE OR A PURPOSE WHO
PARTIES A LOT. BUT I'M NOT A PERSON WHO
PARTYAISE LOT. >> Stephen: WHAT IS THE
WILDEST PARENT OF YOU? >> THE WILDEST PART OF ME. >> Stephen: DID YOU READ THE
ARTICLE? >> NO, WAS IT GOOD. >> Stephen: I CAN'T GET PAST
THE PAY WALL. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE ARTICLE IS
ABOUT. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE ARTICLE
IS ABOUT. >> I'M WITH YOU 100%. WHAT DOES IT MEAN, "BORN TO BE
WILD BUT WITH A PURPOSE"? WHAT IS MY PURPOSE? DOES IT SAY IN THERE AT ALL? GLUL. >> Stephen: ALL I HAVE IS THE
HEADLINE. I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING HERE. DID ANYONE HEAR READ THE
ARTICLE? >> DOES ANYONE KNOW MY PURPOSE? <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
>> Stephen: YES, EXACTLY. >> THAT'S A LONG SHOT. I THOUGHT I MIGHT GET IT. >> Stephen: YOU HAVE DONE LOTS
OF SHAKESPEARE, INCLUDING SHAKESPEARE IN THE PARK. I SAW YOU AT BAM DOING "YAGO." >> IT WAS DOWNTOWN AT THE
PUBLIC. >> Stephen: THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT I MANT, AT THE PUBLIC, DOING "YAGO." >> INSIDE,. >> Stephen: INSIDE. WHAT'S IT LIKE TO DO IT OUTSIDE? I GO EVERY YEAR. >> IT'S AMAZING. >> Stephen: AND THE SCENERY
IS NEW YORK CITY, WHICH CAN BE A LITTLE DISTRACTING. >> IT CAN BE CHALLENGING. >> Stephen: WHAT'S IT LIKE TO
GRAB THE AUDIENCE'S ATTENTION WITH A LITTLE BIT OF A BACKDROP? >> THE FIRST TIME I WENT TO SEE
SHAKESPEARE IN THE PART, I THOUGHT I SAW "OTELLO," AND THE
GREAT WHITE HERON FLEW UP PAST THE CASTLE. >> Stephen: LIKE HER SOUL
TAKING FLIGHT. >> EXACTLY. I HAD A SIMILAR EXPERIENCE WHEN
IFTS DOING THE SCOTTISH PLAY. I WAS DOING, "IF IT WAS DONE
WHEN DONE SPEECH," WHICH IS A VERY IMPORTANT AND INTENSE
SPEECH WHICH IS WHEN THE SCOTTISH KING-- I CAN'T SAY HIS
NAME IN A THEATER, IT'S BAD LUCK-- IS TRYING TO DECIDE
WHETHER OR NOT HE'S GOING TO KILL THE KING DUNCAN. AND IF HE SAID, IF IT'S DONE,
IT'S DONE"-- I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M USING A SCOTTISH ACCENT. I LOOKED DOWN CENTER, AND THERE
WAS A RACCOON. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
NOT EXACTLY A GREAT WHITE HERON. AND THE RACCOON WAS UP ON ITS
HAUNCHES KIND OF LOOKING AT ME. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
AND I COULD HEAR CHUCKLES IN THE AUDIENCE, AND I KNEW I WAS IN
TROUBLE, BECAUSE THAT MEANT THAT THE AUDIENCE ALSO SAW THE
RACCOON. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
BUT I'M A TRAINED ACTOR. AND I KNEW IN THAT MOMENT THAT
ALL I NEEDED TO DO TO SA SAVE TH SCENE WAS TO HOLD THE ATTENTION
OF THAT RACCOON. IF I COULDN'T KEEP THAT
RACCOON'S ATTENTION, I WAS DOOMED. BECAUSE IF I WASN'T WORTH THE
RACCOON'S ATTENTION, I CERTAINLY WASN'T WORTH 1500 NEW YORKERS'
ATTENTION. AND SO I FIND MYSELF PLAYING THE
ENTIRE MONOLOGUE TO THE RACCOON. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
WHICH REALLY MAKES IT 10 TIMES WORSE BECAUSE WANT AUDIENCE IS
ALL LOOKING AT EACH OTHER GOING, "WHY THE HELL IS HE PLAYING THE
MONOLOGUE TO THE RACCOON. DIDN'T HE EVER WATCH W.C. FIELDS
AND KNOW HOW DANGEROUS IT IS? >> Stephen: IT WORK. >> NO. >> Stephen: IT KEEP THE
RACCOON'S ATTENTION? >> THE RACCOON WADDLED OFF UNDER
SOMEBODY'S CHAIR AND ATE A PRETZEL AND THE WHOLE HOUSE BLEW
UP LAUGHING AND... <i> ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )</i>
IT WAS A BAD NIGHT. >> Stephen: SOY HE UNDERMINED
YOU. THE RACCOON-- THE RACCOON STOLE
FOCUS COMPLETELY FROM YOU. >> HAVE YOU EVER WORKED WAY
RACCOON? >> Stephen: I REFUSE TO WORK
WITH RACCOONS. >> SMART GLLS YOU KNOW WHAT THAT
RACCOON WAS? THAT RACCOON WAS WILD WITH A
PURPOSE. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
>> YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. >> Stephen: THAT'S WHAT THE
ARTICLE SAYS. >> YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. >> Stephen: OKAY, SEASON SEVEN
OF "RAY DONOVAN." >> YEAH. >> Stephen: JUST STARTED
SUNDAY NIGHT. >> NO, DID IT-- OH, YES, SORRY. >> Stephen: I'M SORRY, IT
PREMIERES SUNDAY. I THOUGHT IT SAID "PREMIERED." PREMIERES SUNDAY, LET'S NOT GET
AHEAD OF OURS. >> THANKS COAL-BERT. >> Stephen: YOU GOT IT CHICKEN
KIEV. SEVEN YEARS IN THE SAME
CHARACTER. YOU WERE NEVER ON TV BEFORE SO
YOU NEVER PLAYED ANYBODY FOR THAT LONG. WHAT IS THE CHALLENGE FOR YOU OF
DOING A CHARACTER FOR SEVEN YEARS? >> WELL, ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS
ABOUT BEING ON A SUCCESSFUL TELEVISION SHOW IS THAT THE
WORLD GETS TO WATCH YOU GET OLDER. >> Stephen: I WOULDN'T KNOW. >> NO. >> Stephen: I WOULDN'T KNOW. <i> ( LAUGHTER ).</i> >> NO, I-- YOU KNOW, I NEVER
BELIEVED IN ANY OF THAT METHOD STUFF. I WAS NEVER A HUGE PROPONENT OF,
YOU KNOW, "CALL ME BY MY CHARACTER'S NAME," OR DEEP,
DEEP-- I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A KIND OF TECHNICAL ACTOR. AND DOING A FUNCTIONAL SERIAL
KILLER FOR SEVEN YEARS HAS BEEN CHALLENGING. >> Stephen: HARD TO DROP AT
THE END OF A SHOOT DAY? <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
NEED A LITTLE VIOLENCE TO CLEANSE YOUR PALETTE. >> THIS IS NOT THE KIND OF THING
YOU SHOULD TALK ABOUT ON A LATE-NIGHT TV SHOW, BUT I WILL. I-- I DON'T KNOW WHY, BUT I
WILL. I-- THE OTHER DAY, I TOLD MY
KIDS-- I WAS-- I WAS A LITTLE HOT TEMPERED WITH MY KIDS. AND I SAT THEM DOWN AND I SAID,
"YOU KNOW, GUYS IN, I'M REALLY SORRY, BUT I THINK DADDY'S
BRINGING HOME WORK EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE." >> Stephen: OH! >> "AND I OWE YOU GUYS AN
APOLOGY." >> Stephen: THAT'S REALLY
SWEET YOU. >> I WAS ACTUALLY PRETTY
IMPRESSED WITH HOW WELL THEY TOOK IT. >> Stephen: DID THEY AGREE
WITH YOU? >> YES. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
AND THEY -- >> Stephen: THAT'S A GOOD
RELATIONSHIP. >> AND THEY THINK RAY DONOVAN IS
A REAL ( BLEEP ), SO IT WAS GOOD THAT WE CLEARED THE-- CLEARED
THE FLOOR. >> Stephen: SPEAK OF YOUR
CHILDREN, I LIKE YOUR TWITTER BIO. >> OH. >> Stephen: YOUR TWITTER BIO
DESCRIBED YOU-- LET'S GET THIS RIGHT-- HIRSUTE ACTOR TYPE BEST
KNOWN FOR HIS SLAVIC FAT PADS AND SHOCKINGLY ATTRACTIVE
CHILDREN. WHAT IS-- WHAT IS-- WHAT IS A
SLAVIC FAT PAD? >> I COULD GO ON A LENGTHY
EXPLANATION, BUT IT BASICALLY MEANS YOU HAVE FAT CHEEKS. >> Stephen: OH, THIS IS THE
FAT PAD? >> YES, EASTERN EUROPEANS
GENETICALLY ARE PRONE TO FAT CHEEKS. >> Stephen: LIKE YOU HAVE
STRAPPED A PORK CHOP TO EACH SIDE. >> PUTIN. >> Stephen: PUTIN? >> PIEWPTIN, FAT CHEEK S. >> Stephen: YOU COULD PLAY
PUTIN. <i> ( LAUGHTER )</i>
>> YOU HEARD IT HERE. >> Stephen: WHAT? >> YOU HEARD IT HERE. >> Stephen: YEAH, THERE IT IS. >> I THINK I'M A FOOT TALLER
THAN HIM BUT... >> Stephen: PLAY PUTIN. HAVE SOMEBODY ELSE EAT YOUR
SUSHI AFTER THAT. >> FANTASTIC. >> Stephen: THE JOKE IS THAT
HE MURDERS PEOPLE. >> I KNOW. >> Stephen: SEASON SEVEN OF "RAY
DONOVAN" PREMIERES SUNDAY ON SHOWTIME. LIEV SCHREIBER, EVERYBODY! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH DANIEL
KALUUYA.
