- [Devin] Thanks to Mack
Weldon for keeping Legal Eagle in the air and helping me look fly. (eagle screeches) - Imagine being a lawyer
skimming through old records for months working on a
strategy to free your client and this mo(beep) shows
up to court like this. You can't fix stupid. (light, music-box-like music) Hey, Legal Eagles, it's
time to think like a lawyer, because I am outside of the Eagles' lair in a secret location that
may or may not be related to some skiing and snowboarding
that I am currently doing. And it's secret, not
because it's a true secret, but maybe because I don't
want people to judge me based on my skiing and
snowboarding skills. But because I am on location,
I asked you to provide me with some great legal
memes, and once again, you guys did not disappoint. I have so many legal memes to get through. We're going to be laughing and crying and everything in between. So without further ado,
let's dig in once again to Meme Review. (drums beat) - Meme Review! Meme Review trademark of
PewDiePie, all rights reserved. All right, so let's
dig into our first meme that you guys sent in. The look you get when opposing counsel is approaching the well without permission. (laughs) So as you know, you are not
allowed to enter the well without permission. The well is the distance
between counsel table and the judge, and if you are
overly aggressive about it, the bailiff will tackle you. Don't do it. Get permission first. (drums beat) - When the only case you can
find to cite is from 1823. True story, this happens all the time. And yeah, we definitely feel like we are in Victorian England here
with the powdered wigs and the ridiculous ensembles. The thing is the older
cases are easier facts, and the opinions that
judges write were way easier to understand a hundred or 200
years ago than they are now. Now, if you get to court and the appellate court writes a decision, it's on a very, very marginal issue that's going to be really
splitting some fine hairs. So often the really, really
old cases are often the best. And of course we lawyers
feel like we are characters in "Amadeus." (drums beat) - Okay, when a first-year
redacts discovery. A blurred face another blurred face, and the woman whose
face was blurred before. First-year associates are the worst. When you graduate from law
school, you then often go to work for a big firm,
and when that happens, the thing that you realize is
law school didn't prepare you for anything, so you are
really being an apprentice for a law firm, and guess what? You're going to make some mistakes like redacting things that are obvious and then forgetting to redact
the exact same thing later on. So yeah, first-years: definitely double-check your redactions. (drums beat) - When your client tells you he's done his own legal research. Oh, this happened to me
a couple of days ago. It wasn't a client so much
as a potential opposing party who had clearly done some
legal research on their own, by going on Google which
is the equivalent of going on WebMD and then diagnosing
yourself with cancer. Do not do your own legal research. You will be wrong. You will look like an incredible idiot to anyone that actually
knows what they're doing. Friends don't let friends
do their own legal research. (drums beat) - When someone tells me
they got into law school. My deepest sympathies. Oh man, AttorneyProblems is
really knocking it out here. Law school can be a lot of fun. Law school can also be
very, very terrible. And like the video that I did last week about "My Crazy Ex-Girlfriend," a lot of people really, really hate it and they say don't be a lawyer. I am not necessarily one of those people. Some people should not go to law school but some people definitely
should go to law school. So if you go to law school,
you have my sympathies but there are ways to get through it. (drums beat) - Um, yeah, if you could
stop calling every other day for a case update,
that'd be great. (laughs) So I think this is about a client that wants too many updates. I don't really mind that. The clients need to be
informed and frankly, it's the duty of the lawyer
to reach out to their client and give them updates. So often lawyers don't
give updates nearly enough but yeah, they can they can definitely ask for too many updates. (drums beat) - Me as a lawyer: my client is innocent. Them: your client is on video
dragging a lifeless body into the woods. I said what I said. You know, it's not so much
video that is the thing that really kills clients,
at least in a civil context. That definitely does happen
in a criminal context, but in a civil context
which is most of what I do, it's really the emails. The emails will kill
you every single time. People don't understand
that those emails are going to be used against you in a court of law. The lawyers are basically stuck with arguing what we have to argue. I said what I said. (drums beat) - When the old dude asks if
you're the court reporter. Ooh, Ooh, that's bad, yeah. Law often can be an old boys club and they will make all kinds
of really sexist remarks, and it's a problem for female
young associates especially, that they get mistaken for
court reporters or staff or something else. Times will change eventually,
and people will understand that that's not appropriate
but it definitely happens. (drums beat) - The sales contract had
a few strings attached. I played with them for two hours. (laughs) Aww, a kitty. (cat meows) - I don't think this needs
any explanation from me. This is just a perfect joke. (drums beat) - When you're a law student
that hasn't argued with anyone for a few seconds. I will argue with anyone about anything. (laughs) Okay, yeah. Law students have a
well-deserved reputation for arguing a lot. In fact, there's actually a term for that. The person or people that
have to argue all the time, they're called gunners and we hate them. They just can't shut up. They have to have the last word. They have to ask questions. Yeah, they will argue
about anything with anyone. They're terrible people. Don't be a gunner. (drums beat) - Civil law in a nutshell: General rule, exception. Oh my God. Oh, that really hits home. For example, we've talked
about hearsay a lot on this channel. As you probably know, there
are lots of hearsay exceptions. And as you probably know, the exceptions to the hearsay rule swallow
the hearsay rule in general. Most things that are considered
hearsay will come in. Like this dam, the dam is broken and all of that stuff is
coming in, and frankly, I don't think that's the worst thing. Civil law, especially
civil procedure, man, the exceptions really preponderate
over the general rule. (drums beat) - Courtroom exchange of the day. Doctor, before you performed the autopsy did you check for a pulse?
No. Did you check for blood pressure? No. Did you check for breathing? No. So then is it possible
that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? No. How can you be sure, Doctor? Because his brain was
sitting on my desk in a jar. But could the patient have
still been alive, nevertheless? Yes, it is possible that
he could have been alive and practicing law. (laughs) I definitely have seen this one before. It's been floating around
the internet for a long time. I would love for someone to track down to see if this is actually a
real deposition transcript. It's just too good to be true. I really want it to be true. I kind of doubt that it is. And also, I don't think that
an autopsy would have begun with a brain in a jar. I think you would have
to perform the autopsy for their brain to be removed. If only there was some sort
of medical professional that could let me know
how autopsies are done that would be really
helpful in this situation. - Hey, Legal Eagle, Dr. Francis here. Now I'm somewhat dubious
about this particular meme and I'd like to present
the following evidence for your consideration. You see, an autopsy or
post-mortem normally begins after an external examination of the body by making a large incision
from the neck all the way down to the pelvic bone. Sometimes it's Y-shaped,
starting at either shoulder and meeting around the xiphoid sternum and again, continuing down to the pelvis. At that point, all the
internal organs of the chest and the abdomen are removed and inspected. Only, at that point is
the skull cavity opened and the brain removed. So I find it hard to believe
that the brain would have been on the pathologist's desk at
the start of the procedure. Hence, I submit to you thus
that this joke is guilty of medical meme malpractice. Thanks, Rohin. I learned something. (drums beat) - I think I found my new lawyer. Just because you did it
doesn't mean you're guilty. (laughs) That's actually true, believe it or not. So for example, let's say that a person
kills another person. You would think that that would be murder but let's say that they
acted in self-defense. Just because you killed
someone, you did it, doesn't necessarily
mean that you're guilty of the crime of murder. So yeah, this lawyer, he knows what's up. (drums beat) - 0L: people have to be exaggerating about how miserable law school is. There's just no way
it's as bad as they say. 1L: I too was hustled,
scammed, bamboozled, hoodwinked, led astray. (laughs) I wonder if that is in
reference to the Fyre Festival that Ja Rule did. - [Man] The cheese sandwich. That was when I knew this was done. - It's pretty much as
bad as they say it is. Doesn't mean that you can't have fun. You definitely will have
fun, but man, 1L's the devil. Oh yeah, and 0Ls are people
that are accepted to law school, but haven't yet started law school. So yeah, they definitely have
questions about law school and it definitely sounds bad. And then you get to law school and you find out it's pretty freaking bad. (chuckles) - [Girl] Turn around, turn
this bus right around. (drums beat) - Sprinkling your law school essay with Latin legal terminologies like non est factum, contra
preferentum, ratio descendis, descend (chuckles), I
can't even pronounce that. Ratio dicendendi. That's
a new, new one by me. Onus of proof, obiter
dicta, stare decisis, okay. Common misconception about lawyers: good lawyers really try to avoid adding too much Latin terminology and really any kind of Inside
Baseball legal terminologies. It's not persuasive. Sometimes you have to do it. But good legal writers
will do everything they can to avoid adding the kind of
language that isn't going to resonate with most people. So, yeah, law students
like to add that (beep) but good lawyers should generally
not if they can avoid it. (drums beat) - I am a law student. I have this weird self-esteem
issue where I hate myself yet I still think I am
better than everyone else. It's so true. Oh my God, it's so true. We're really hating on law
students on this episode, but I love it. When you get to law school, everyone has this imposter syndrome. You are questioning yourself. You think that you're not
as smart as everybody else, and yet at the same time,
you really can't help but have this superiority complex over basically everybody else and especially other grad students. - I graduated first in
my class from Princeton. I've an IQ of 187. - It's obviously not
warranted in most cases, except for business school
students and management students. They're just the worst. Basically business school
is two years of keg parties and karaoke. Business students. (drums beat) - Imagine being a lawyer
skimming through old records for months, working on a
strategy to free your client and this mo(beep) shows
up to court like this. You can't fix stupid. (drums beat) - Clement Vallandigham,
a lawyer who while trying to demonstrate how the victim might have
accidentally shot himself, shot himself and died. He then won the case. Task failed successfully. (laughs) You know, I have never heard of this. I need to go on Wikipedia and find out if this is, in fact, true. You can imagine that a demonstrative that ends up killing the lawyer who is using the demonstrative, that would be very powerful evidence. I would probably also vote to acquit if the lawyer killed
himself in the process. Cue insert lawyer jokes,
dead lawyer, good outcome, blah, blah, blah This is legal memes. We're not making lawyer
jokes here. (chuckles) (drums beat) - Sure, you have a lawyer, but does your lawyer have a lawyer? (chuckles) I need to do
more Better Call Saul. It's so good. Usually the lawyers don't
need their own lawyer but with this presidential administration, the lawyers need lawyers and
those lawyers need lawyers. - Let's just say I know
a guy who knows a guy who knows another guy. (drums beat) - Thank God, the Facebook lawyer is here. Oh God, it's so true. I've run into so many
people who basically went to the Zuckerberg Law School in Palo Alto. I mean, it's just, it's crazy. If you do your own legal research or you make legal
arguments in the internet and I'm reading them, that's basically what I assume you look like all the time. (drums beat) - Lawyer: No guys, you can't show kids. Us: Baby Yoda is 50, so
technically he's 21 plus. Lawyer. Oh, Keystone, such terrible
beer, but great memes. Well done. (drums beat) - Making factual findings,
appellate courts, deference to the trial court. (laughs) Okay, this one probably needs
a little bit of explanation. So the trial court
technically is the only court that can take on new facts. People get this wrong all the time. They say, "oh, I'm going
to appeal something," and then think that they
can add new facts on appeal. You can't. The appellate court, well,
at least generally speaking, is not allowed to add new
facts into the record. So this guy that's looking
away from deference to the trial court, the appellate court is
supposed to give deference to the trial court's factual findings, and yet appellate courts
will often find some way of bringing up a new fact into the record. They shouldn't do it. It's not their job to do it. It does definitely happen. This is one of the most
Inside Baseball legal memes and I love it. (drums beat) - Big law firms, solo attorney. (laughs) I just love the idea
of like a solo attorney out on a paddleboard trying to
use an umbrella to windsurf. That's amazing. The joke here as you can well
imagine is big firms have all of the resources and the solo
firms have very few resources. I would say that in this day and age where even the smallest
attorney has access to legal databases like
LexisNexis or Westlaw, the disparity is not quite
as big as it used to be. The big firms can still throw
tons of people at a problem but the solo firms still
have some advantages as well. So we're all getting by with
our umbrellas on a paddleboard. It gets you where you need to go. (drums beat) - Can you guys please recommend books that made you cry? Introduction to Property Law. (laughs) Oh. (crackle) (record scratches) Yup, that's me. I bet you're wondering how I got here. Well, the camera just froze over so I'm going to pick
things up from the inside. The joys of modern technology
and trying to use them in the outdoors. Okay. So where did we leave off? Ah, yes. Property law. So the thing about property
law and why its reading that will make you cry is that
when you go to law school, you are required to take
certain law school classes, and one of those is property law. And of all of the first
year classes that you take, property law is probably the
one that is the most archaic and arcane. It's totally ridiculous. You have to learn this
whole new vocabulary. I really did not like property. I really haven't used property that much. I use contracts all the time. I use torts all the time. I use criminal law all the time, but I rarely actually use property, and it's really antiquated and yeah, it'll make first years cry, for sure. (drums beat) - All right. Arguing a motion to
compel discovery. (laughs) Okay, so the joke here is that
when you are arguing a motion to compel discovery, you're basically just throwing
accusations back and forth like two Spider-Men who
are pointing at each other. If you make an accusation that the other side is not
giving you the documents that that you want or they're
not giving you the depositions of the witnesses that you want, they're going to go right back and they're going to make
the same accusations at you. This is very, very accurate. It's a little too accurate,
it's a little too close to home. (drums beat) - When opposing counsel
wins a discovery motion. Oh my God. Ah, that look
on Nancy Pelosi's face. So the joke here is that when the other side
wins a discovery motion, just like the ones we just talked about, where you're arguing that they're not giving you the documents or the discovery that
you need, and they win, you give the most insincere
congratulations of all times, because you really don't
like the opposing counsel and you really don't want
to give them the documents or you want to get the
documents from them, and maybe the judge is
saying you can't get them. I definitely feel Nancy Pelosi. I've lost my fair share
of discovery motions, and it sucks every time. (drums beat) - Okay. Using The Bluebook. Guessing and effing up
my citations, oh, no. So what you probably don't
know is in law school and really only law school, you have this thing called The Bluebook and it's a reference manual
for citations in the papers that you write in law school. You really don't use it as a
practicing attorney very much if at all, but it controls your life when you're in law school. There are these stupid citations. They're not like Chicago,
they're not like APA. Law school has their own
stupid citation system, and yeah, after a while
you get fed up with it and you just move on
because it's terrible. So all those law students
out there know exactly what The Bluebook is and they
hate it because it's stupid and I wish it would die. (drums beat) - All right. What if you wanted to understand contracts but God said, Cardozo, Judge. I just did an episode
featuring Judge Cardozo. The Case of "What's in the
Box?" where Judge Cardozo who was initially on the
New York Court of Appeals, eventually went to the Supreme Court. That guy is a genius and
that guy writes some opinions that are really, really
hard to understand. So if you want to understand contracts and you have a Cardozo
case, good freaking luck. (drums beat) - Where were you the night of the murder? Me: home. Lawyer: you weren't at Jason's? Me: no. Lawyer: LMAO dude, everyone was there. (laughs) I'm sorry you weren't there, bro. The party was, I don't know, slapping. Is that what the kids say these days? Party was slapping, you
should have been there. (drums beat) - Did you hear? Everyone on Facebook just
graduated Magna Cum Laude from law school. Oh boy, there is definitely
a time of the year when everyone graduates from law school and they definitely
announce on all social media that they just graduated from law school, especially if they graduated
with honors and everybody knows about it because they're
telling everyone all the time. Very true. (drums beat) - Why, yes, I totally spent
three years in law school, took the bar exam and spent $150,000, just so I could give
you free legal advice. (laughs) Oh boy. Yeah. So word to the wise for
future law graduates. When you graduate from law school, you won't really know
anything about the law. You won't know anything
about practicing law but that will not stop all
of your friends and family from asking you for free legal advice. If you give free legal advice to someone, they effectively become your client. That's why you hear lawyers all the time, myself included, say that
this is not legal advice. Do not take this as legal advice, do not get free legal advice
from a YouTube attorney. Because if I were to purposefully and intentionally give you legal advice, that would make you my client, I'm ethically bound to then represent you, and so that's why I try not to do it. And that is why all of you
new law graduates out there remember that that is your best defense from preventing a thousand people from being your clients,
including friends and family. So remember: friends don't let friends
give free legal advice. (drums beat) - When you're at court and
someone is pissing off the judge before your case. Brah, I really feel this meme. When you go to court, there's
usually a long docket. There might be literally 20
cases in front of the judge that morning. Usually the hearings are in the morning, or if you have a trial
it's in the afternoon and the judge will just
want to knock these out one after the other. And the thing is if the people
ahead of you are arguing, they're going to piss off
the judge and they're going to make your hearing
particularly difficult. So yeah, you just sit there in the gallery amongst all the other
people who are waiting to have their cases heard,
and you're just like, brah, come on, let it go. Stop riling up the judge. I have this like tiny
thing that I need the judge to rubber stamp, stop
screwing up my hearing. And obviously when I go to
court, I have to wear a suit and tie because you have to
look good when you're in court. But when I'm not in court, I tend to wear things
that are a lot more casual like the stuff that I'm wearing right now which is why I'm so thrilled that Mack Weldon is today's
sponsor because this shirt that I've been wearing
for this entire time both in the snow and inside
is a Mack Weldon polo. It's incredibly soft and
incredibly comfortable. I've worn it for hours
at a time playing tennis. It's great for athletic and athleisure. I love it to death. Now I'm also wearing their
world famous boxer briefs but obviously I can't show you that but here is a picture of me
wearing those boxer briefs. It's definitely me. It is not a model. It's not stock photography. That's clearly my body
there in the background. I'm sorry that we couldn't
show my face in this picture but I assure you, that's
definitely me wearing those boxer briefs. Mack Weldon is a men's
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design and premium fabrics. And as I said, if I'm not in court, I'm probably wearing something like this: much more casual, much more athletic. I've tried their polos,
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makes a world of difference. I ordered with my own money. I had multiple sizes shipped to me to try different sizes on, and
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that you're not satisfied, you can just keep them and
still get a free refund because who wants to
return used underwear? (dog barks) So again, just click on the
link in the description. Clicking on that link really
helps out this channel. So do you agree with my analysis of these ridiculous legal memes? Or do you have another legal meme that you would like me to review? Let me know in the comments
and check out this playlist over here that has all
of my other meme reviews and my reactions to the
things on Reddit and Twitter and all the other crazy legal
issues that are happening on social media. So just click on this playlist
and I'll see you in court.
