Jonathan Winters Carson Tonight Show 19/5-1988

oh there's no explaining it is it just it happens we'll be back Johnny winters is here and Don yeah so stay where you are okay we have we have another 11 year old with us tonight Johnny winters Jonathan winters has probably had as much influence on other comedians as anybody I know but nobody can be Johnny winters he is unique as a movie coming out called moon over Parador with Richard Dreyfuss coming out in August and he is a book out called winter's tales stories and observations for the unusual mm-hmm no kidding welcome Jonathan winters thank goodness I was certainly taken with the little girl isn't she I really was I you know at eleven of course I was still doing this if I give you they were saying that if I give you four apples and three more how many do you have too many for my lunchbox at eleven not funny not funny to the teacher no and this kid is in Congress kid is in college boy it must be of course she's doing a smart thing from my standpoint she's dating a 19 year old because that guy is probably very sophisticated and type fine honey how are you here's another copy of my Sandman I don't really good I was kidding I was getting poor what were you like in school what was a lie you disrupt leave were you know I wasn't I almost people would think you're crazy I know that well they do today yes but years ago I was a very normal child to normal probably I wasn't making any money no my parents were divorced I won't go into a long thing indifference - they're gone anyway but I'm sorry ah the thing was that dad was on funeral somewhere in an open - fielder settling insurance policies near a creek bank and so I I just didn't know about him where he wasn't as always explained he's away everybody in our family was away about where's uncle uh you know Aunt Emma she's away dear you never knew well well I knew that eventually as I went by one of the institution they read uh mom mom did her vasquel and she's tried but I I struggled because you know when people say it so did you ask the little girl which was interesting said whether for some of your favorite subjects and what are you excel in well when you're 11 in college of course you excel in everything yeah um I just I was blown in all departments math was not my best yeah I really I got as far as geometry and I thought that was just I mean having been tutored in literally everything from the apples to algebra a square plus B square and sitting remember that oh please but because I remember the students going up and finishing I was always like this you know I when she was saying I really taken by her philosophy some of those words um well it was always said John winters uh problem number six and I was I'd be but you become an actor it's interesting I was calling on you know failures then I mean mine failures arthritis in both feet so I'd say I can't walk sir I can't walk to the board maybe if you bring the board to me get up Shirley sure but I like the multiple choice stuff because you had a shot at it you know where did you go to school to take a guess did you have multiple choice sure we had I told you dr. niller you cheated me we didn't get the multiple choice god bless yes at the essays were the worst those eyes never hold well now you're talking about a leech with a blue book I was in college just about an hour first of all they paddled me I wasn't used to that at come out of three years the Marines and the guy said assume the angle and I said what angle we're talking about but back to geometry again I grab the ankles how many times right you know in those days Iranian shape L had the 32 waist and we didn't have steroids in those days we picked each other up if you could find an attractive man you know what well oh yeah without going too far building ah the arms automatically grow um no the guy spanked me or paddled me and I had to repeat all the chapters and apparently a lot of chapters in the deke and that was it huh well that was it for him yeah uh I just heard of course you were in the Marines yeah I just well the three three years I I really I don't know where I what I didn't wear was a lot because we weren't told and many's the time you know people say where I was I knew we were in the Pacific you in the Mauritius you were game a general okay don't bring just occur that's as good as a general just be very proud of that right did you strafe a lot of workers in the field I'm Salim on your agenda wait a minute my sieges went down hey I see just one down you may be about this I thought we were so he meant I thought it was all over the seizures went well you may be dating a little girl trick Smith it's over it's over NBC is true the way they tell you they just go see put it down they move somebody in I thought the little girl was gonna run in hey he's my size now I am I haven't seen fire you take a vacation I'm what you call a vacation vacation go say Li Johnny I've been on so many I I as a matter of fact and I'm not making this up you know some stuff I have to I mean if you return home late at night you better have a story um so anyway I'm going fishing in two weeks with a companion and oh no a wonderful guy I wanted to take a girl but I'm married sky you know fingers are gone whatever we're going up to we're gonna fly from here LAX to Minneapolis and then Minneapolis to International Falls and end of Bemidji little place that's where the river Mississippi River yeah interesting piece history it's a little girl might be interested in this it's only about that wide so anybody can step over the Mississippi right in that Bemidji oh girl fish there yep big dynamite to get anything then we go into Canada and do a lot of this you know on oh jeez what's effect Ron Harry it should be committees and I'm dabbing out and cooking it all that's up well it's it's fun if you don't get bitten by a snake I got bitten one year and I don't want to get into where I was bitten but it stopped fishing right away right at any rate would say who said it it's just fun to get outdoors you will sell a little something here and we'll come back every time John comes on we can to give him a little exercise here since you do so many characters to talk about traveling I'm gonna give you a couple of names of safe tourists from other countries who are coming over to America on vacation and you just give me your impressions or why they came here or wherever it flows all right um British agents Leslie sits puffin actually it's it's Fitz puffin sits I'm sorry yeah it's mispronounced it was where the when I was first a young agent and obviously still being mispronounced bets Turk perfectly understandable perfect all right I've never been in all my travels I was at the British Army and as a youth I wasn't with any army I was just mainly its home in Devon but when I when I jumped out of school I went directly to Africa and then we engage the Italians there and and and then the Germans too and I was in the bloody war for some time then then have time took its toll and I went to India and raised snakes and then now I now I want to go to America and I have my chief reason for going there's so many reasons I'm a new thing of 50 states my god in heaven it's tremendous amount of people in a vast country I can only think of China and Russia being as big or Africa America's right in there is just enormous and so much going on you know color TV and automobiles on the highways and pretty girls doing things and so yeah I want to go and see a baseball game any man that makes a couple of million pounds with a mitten in the middle of summer tete seeing a citywide ball and hitting something with a stick I won't see it just what if I didn't see it I suppose I'd go directly to apartment put my head near an air-conditioner all right thank you how about Monsieur Francois default yeah Monsieur de feu mr. fule not your name again oh no it's alright you know it foo is correct and you know food in in French means crazy I didn't know that oh yes I'm very aware of that Francois decreased Air France 20 foo France party crazy you know when he's translated into English at only but I my reason for coming to America like the other man I I was I was never in a war it was unfortunate I couldn't go ahead double murmur in the mind or something and I think ordered a moussaka waste [ __ ] don't sold you which is mine the memory the ice rolled around and you can't concentrate on the artillery so I passed on that and had just a series of affairs the song share I said but I'm going to America because I've always wanted to go to Hollywood Hollywood oh yes I've been married you know six or seven times Eunice oh yes and I'd like to try one more you know maybe go to Anaheim for a honeymoon and whatever you know I bet I have seen so many beautiful women you know there are only in Paris or Bordeaux or Monaco or you know Algiers or whatever Italy there are a number of them you know right in Hollywood young girls who are twenty-five thirty thirty-five right now I would settle for a woman about forty eight a good woman who just didn't do [ __ ] what do superlative Bhootnath I know a woman down the street where I live is leather she carries a ghetto blaster very nice Alice talked to a tourist from Germany Hans Belden Huffer yes that's exactly right well done good thinking and spelled offer on smithing obviously I'm Sherman you know and a lot of people during the the engagement I was in thought I was touch I started out with the Edam cheese as a child and we captured up a guy by a windmill when father and I were visiting Amsterdam my main reason for coming to America is to visit the cemeteries big but not I've cemeteries I love battlefields watch me I should have said battlefields the same thing you know if you died there but again and just or you just whatever you know but I want to also see my dream and I'm originally from well originally from Bavaria you know ah yeah I recognize sir Freud and Steckler I hate you and raised your hands to her later used to be in that leather coat in Paraguay give you away any rate I really looking forward to to seeing Detroit Detroit oh yeah any major city with all those incredible marvelous people and those guys that sit down at the drawing boards and make the cars they goofed I want to see why Detroit made a mistake yes yeah ballistic other than that you know a couple of Stein's a little beer frosted hey Oh geesh you had a good you actually went to a Paraguay to make this movie well no we went to Brazil Brazil she went in Brazil um you're a gopher parent went over Parador won't be out I I wish we had anything is still we have nothing over here times you an actor sits there and starts to talk about a movie we have nothing for you to see oh you'll just have to wait like me sure yeah crash we went down a year ago um our first trip tempura strip first strip well I've been down to Colombia I shouldn't drop heavy names but oh good Colombians they're a little bit of everything here tonight two hands here one lady from Germany incredible uh went down to Colombia years ago and I've been in I would see um well Peru which I really loved I owe to from Peru here ask of here's some else throw a light on that person you know they're from Encino at any rate I love Peru that's much of each about we in Brazil wait a Marvis time richard dreyfuss who's a fantastic actor and one of the hottest properties around uh-oh did a great job along with Raul Julia who was he just finished that series on an Asus where he he played aristotle onassis and he's an exciting actor uh along with Sammy Davis jr. a a wonderful guy and and a guy that's been around since he was before the little eleven year old uh it was a great guy and a lot of fun to be with you speak the language at all did I speak the word is you just make it up I can speak Spanish if you put something to the head and that's quite long and black then chances are we'll talk about the tires under co-channel cell anemia semi enfermo donde Seco Jackie you know en Oman DSO muerte mark on um comes to you know you got to do it you got to throw a lot of things around very fast despacio you know the guy will say hopefully the guy from Paraguay or from Brazil their Portuguese in Brazil yeah marvelous country uh I took a lot of pills and they didn't work I for food and other reasons and I was just up all night watching Portuguese television that and just sort of oh um and and of course in my lap I had some most of the times when you do go to the commode the bathroom whatever they call about oh hey Bonnie oh yeah come on you buddies a bond you tell bond well I went to a barn yo there's another guy you know you're talking about something else or the banya I saw a big pair of Adidas you know so at any rate but I had a great time Paul Mazursky was the guy that director is a fantasy guy a really a funny funny man and I it comes out August 5th which I realize yeah this is me how fast we are um look when he comes out come back and bring a film clip I've got to come back before that John you need the money Danya used to be with us tonight we've asked Don to come back as soon as possible he'll join the Sunnah hey it's good to see you again hey thanks for coming you're looking well and funny as ever thank you own over there right around August will be will have a full clip hopefully tomorrow Sylvester Stallone will be here comedian Steve Mittleman and Victoria Jackson thank you have a nice night I'm humbled by that applause

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Views: 2,918,042

Rating: 4.7397285 out of 5

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Id: 37xIOcNT_qw

Length: 18min 14sec (1094 seconds)

Published: Sat May 28 2016