John Bishop's Ex Wife Accidently Heard A Joke About Her Head | Friday Night With Jonathan Ross

Bishop [Applause] [Music] [Applause] okay thank you I should imagine most people from Liverpool hate hearing that song are they no no we love it it's great we all get together on a Sunday and all to see who's got the longest hair and then sing it to them it's a really nice family get-together yeah yes hey well welcome back because John's never virtually been on the show but a few years back we were lucky enough to have John do warm up here and you were terrific well it was good but it was interesting because I didn't realize I just started doing the standoff then I didn't realize what a big thing it was to do the warm-up on your show no it is though isn't it because you get an opportunity to to see people walk past you like Robbie Williams I remember land that there was Victoria Beckham but I heard you'd given up The Comedy I thought that's why you wouldn't do it anymore they told me you'd gone back to your property no what happened is I'd started doing the comedy whilst having a job and I had no plans to be a kid you worked for a pharmaceutical firm yeah yeah it was a sales director in a pharmaceutical company okay and uh so you went back to that for a while oh no what happened is I kept it going I kept the two things going and that's why I couldn't commit to doing the warmer because I had sales meetings which is just ridiculous I'm saying no I don't want to be on the show with Robbie Williams there because I've got a graph to show so yeah so I I couldn't commit to it and then and then I just kept the two going along and then I just reached the point where I thought I've just got to make a decision but you know I can understand that must be a tough thing because you you had kids already didn't you oh yeah responsibility of like you know I've got a proper job here and I guess you were doing pretty well uh in the company and then you're going to try and had a comedy which is a fairly fickle business and it's quite a tough decision to make well it was but it was also not something that I ever planned to do because it didn't plan to do comedy I never really took it serious it was just that I was getting asked to do more and more at least the points I thought well maybe there's something in it so how did you get into that if you hadn't planned it because most people I know they they seek on me they fall in love with the idea and they want to give it a try but you it was more of an accident was it yeah well I never seen comedy I've been to two comedy clubs in my life but what happened is a split up my wife and then uh and so I was depressed and so I did what most men do when they're depressed I got drunk we've got no one else to talk to like women at all right they'll phone their friends up and say I'm depressed and she'll bring a few friends around and then some ice cream ice cream Bridget Jones Butler Chardonnay then they'll watch the film one of them will start crying they'll hugger she'll get hot take a top off pillow oil massage if you just want to be invited camping yeah uh so you so you went out and you decided to drown yourself traditional no what happened is that I used to have my Lads every weekend and so that meant that every every because of the job I couldn't guarantee better be so every every Monday I dropping back at school in the ocean he wouldn't see him for a weekend not that anyone who's done that so horrible so I used to go out and then it's it's sad because I'm fed up and you know I need to do something tonight and they don't come for the first week or two but you know what a blogs like when you say I'm fed up to go oh fancy game of darts you know what I mean so I was looking for somewhere so go I could call me on I went to a comedy club in Manchester thinking I could just sit in the background and when I walked up to the door the fellow said look it's four pounds again but it's an open mic night I didn't even know what that meant he said and that means if you put your name down you can get in for free so I thought well you know for quit I'm getting divorced that's four quit she's not looking at him so being down put me names that I'd been to two comedy clubs won't be in The Comedy Store in London one be in the same place for four years before I'm expecting it to be filled there was seven people in there five it put the name down and literally you've only been in there 10 minutes longer at the left but my name got called out a second after a fella doing chicken Impressions I'm honestly you stood down thinking well what have I got to lose there's only seven people here and one of them things to use a chicken though so I just got off on the stage and because it was getting divorced I just started talking about getting divorced and how miserable I was and I was meant to do seven minutes I did 35 minutes [Applause] if someone gives you 35 minutes to talk with those Interruption you just grab it don't presumably then uh you didn't want to get back together with your wife because that would have meant uh the end of the material well what happened what happened there was a frightening more I've never told her this what happened was that I used to do this joke where I say hello and it's the comedian's joke where you're trying to chat up the whole room so that there's a chance of getting your leg over so yeah yeah kind of go oh ladies and gentlemen a little bit sad you know I've just split up with me partner and you say look I'm just blissing me away from people go obviously bit more I didn't normally didn't have to milk it like that but I'd say I've just flicked with me wife oh sorry don't worry about it we're not divorce or anything I've just killed it I knew I was going to miss it so I kept it out in the fridge for three months it's really very very handy not a great job what happened was I used to do it because I didn't want anyone though to know that I was there I used to do it under a made-up name and stuff it wasn't for tax reasons so what was your name what was the name Jesus just say open spot Billy Bishop boy Eddie Bishop who's me brother my brother's gonna get hammered for attacks one day and then what happened I was on the stage one night and I'd say I never went to Comedy you never did my wife and I did that joke and on the stage and only see a few people in the audience and I looked to the left in the head that was meant to be in the fridge it was in the audience she was there she was on the wigs dude she didn't know I was going to be on we were we were well it's place up there nearly two years the divorce was going through because I had the kids of a weekend that didn't really share so and I was expecting that I come off the stage seriously so I thought that's going to cost me another 20 grand I walked off the stages you stopped by the band I'm expecting that out to come off and it was lovely because she just said you know that was great I said what she said just just seeing you the way you used to be with that little glint in your hand the the smile on your face you said you know what happened to you I said I married you foreign and it and I'll I'll say this publicly because people should do it she said you know let's go talk to someone I mean not anyone you can't get on a bus and say to a fella listen mate we've been having a few problems we went to a thing called release yeah that is the marriage guidance Services which you know if you'd ask people an end or admits to it but it's like dogging people must be doing it when was this when did you get back together yeah so we've been together now about eight years and you're still together now yeah yeah that's a genuine story that actually happened a genuine story and that's why in many respects I feel so grateful for the fact that comedy was there because it was a way for me to get it all off my chest it was like counseling lately with people laughing at you and uh is there anything to do that uh now how old are you got boys is that why yeah boys how old are the kids 15 13 11. wow that's quite a handful well yeah I've got an older girl and then a boy and a girl to have boys running around with energy that must be quite something but do you talk about them on stage still I do and it's it's funny because it's it's all you can't imagine anything more embarrassing than your dad's trying to be funny yeah especially if you're a teenager exactly you know what teenagers are like they should 've been through it and I don't know if anyone really has been through but I I have to look a full Secret Life often when they were babies to remind myself I used to love them because they're not the same people they're different people all together they should even have to be you know like the other stroke victims to warn you what the symptoms are you should do the same and say see this show look your Ted's going to one side now he won't look at them so there is that little bit where I'm not sure how how much she enjoy putting it to the faster the show comes to the part of my life and in a playful way I have to say to him I I gotta tell you this because when I did the Apollo this brought it all over to me the problem with having kids and doing this job when I did the Apollo you do live at the Apollo and I come on the stage I glanced at the clock and it was a couple of minutes short and I was doing about being married and growing old with someone and these joke jumped into me I don't know where you're from and I said I said you know Pastor the difficulty is you reach a certain stage in your life and you know you're getting old and for the manage when you look down and see your face gray pubic here and I know when it happened to me I looked down and I was disappointed I have to say to me Mrs listen love you're gonna have to tidy that up I'm doing me best here I'm just as a fireman that's that's the guide and then merely so Marilyn he misses so look you know you're on live at the apologies it's a great thing for you it's a great it's a good opportunity I think we should watch it as a family I'm not so sure about that she said no let's watch it as a family so we sat on the couch and obviously I didn't know what was going to be in it yeah so the sander counting is emailing I had to accept it and I could see that joke it's like watching a character and I'm waiting for the punch to come and I said yo oh listen love you're gonna have to test it up and I'm expecting air to go hey and hit me she's laughing at head off goes what you say that I said I said it's just a joke I'm just having a joke it's not true that's just a joke he's gonna do it right for you he said when I go to school everyone's going to say your mum's got a bunch of funny [Applause] he must have been studying badges did you I didn't see this I was told that you went on Celebrity Mastermind oh Jesus how'd you do on that how well did you do it disaster I should say what I'm doing I've got a phone call of the agent she said obviously yo it's been a Gautier and the BBC seem interested in your device is to go on Celebrity Mastermind and I said no chance and she said well I said well I'm not a celebrity and I don't know anything and she said well will it off you know it's a good thing the producer wants to speak to you so the producer for me off and said will you come on I said look I'm not into I don't want to be in anything with celebrity and that's like I'm not really interested she said well it's for charity and I'm sat at home watching the television you know when something happens in the an advert came on for this charity called a smile today it was too brilliant I know they fixed yeah fix cleft pilots in in the third world do fantastic work changes kids lives and the voiceover comes on saying you know put a smile on a child's face change the child's life and I'm like that and this producer's saying to me look we do this for charity you don't get a fee we give you an enhanced fee but it all goes to the charity will you do it and I said I said all right I'll do it for the smile thing yeah she said what's your specialist subject I said holidays I've been on and she honestly set up for you back in 10 minutes I don't know what she was doing and then seven minutes she must have been following me mum going where's your jumping on holidays so then she Fallen back and said what subject I said Liverpool Football Club she said you can't ask that and then and then I said I in fact I never even said it I know I didn't say but I made my own voice saying the Irish potato famine and how well did you do so I'm sorry I didn't see the show I was just told you oh disaster I got me eventual score was 18. well that's not too bad not too bad Anika rice got 88 in the first round yeah because normally people get 14 or 15 in the first round and about 10-12 yeah so so what did you you did I got nine in the face I'll put to be fair I only got 30 in questions because the quest I don't know if anyone here is interested in the Irish potato fam well you can't do a quick question everything's everything's done listen John's on tour are you on tour right now is that right I am on social may I mean this has been a great tour it was supposed to finish at the Liverpool arena in Maple that that's all that's what we're doing the next saw which is a bit more bigger venues it's Wembley and all of that in at the end of the year so I'm really loving it hey what a great guest ladies and gentlemen uh I'm sure you'll agree just Charming company very funny I'm looking forward to seeing you properly live Mr John Bishop ladies [Applause] [Music] thank you [Music]

Channel: Friday Night With Jonathan Ross

Views: 251,307

Keywords: the jonathan ross show, british talk show, british tv, jonathan ross interviews, jonathan ross funny moments, Itv, bbc, celebrity, friday night with jonathan ross, how to get your comedy career started, john bishop comedy special, john bishop full show, john bishop jonathan ross, john bishop wife hears head joke, john bishop upsets sons with live at the apollo

Id: A4cKKYJwWQQ

Length: 14min 19sec (859 seconds)

Published: Wed Oct 19 2022