Internet Comment Etiquette: "Soy Boys"

you know what up [ __ ] it's me bad boy salvia I'm coming at you again another combat etiquette lesson now some of you might not know about me is that in addition to being a bad boy I'm also a SOI boy that's right I love SOI fact the only thing going in this mouth is soy feminist kisses but hey that's just life brah so why don't I take you around the block a little bit today throw back a couple sauces and really just learn what it means to be able to hold up what the [ __ ] is this the truth about soy boys by Paul Joseph Watson nah brah soy food consumption turning men into [ __ ] and making them more likely to adopt left-wing beliefs why is this dude talking so much shitty only man who seriously watch BuzzFeed toefl eating male feminist virtue signaling betta orbiter soy boys I've seen it like that Joey boy stop saying that hi boys shut up so you bought oh [ __ ] with me probably by instead of like that bro surgeons are also conducting an all-time record number of operations to reduce man boo such so you be one of the cool all right that's it man I can't take it anymore I'm gonna show this guy what it's like to have a SOI boyfriend yeah this [ __ ] don't apply to me I'm a bad boy SOI boy I took so many red pills that I overdosed my mom had to call an ambulance brah so he makes me such a [ __ ] then explain all the threesomes I have with my 98-pound Instagram model girlfriend and her other boyfriend I'm okay sharing her with hey nice beard by the way how many months that take to grow out I'd sure love to see your testosterone numbers but the results might come back inconclusive because kissy pie twink isn't a recognized scientific value bra I don't know how they do it over there on fancy accent Island but this is America where we have a long-standing tradition of putting whatever the [ __ ] we want in our mouths without worrying what Paul McCartney's [ __ ] nephew has to say about it I wonder if Paul Joseph Watson could have ever guessed his career as a no-nonsense champion of independent journalism would lead to him bitching for eight minutes straight about dudes eating soy for a website that makes all its money selling homeopathic boner pills just in case you were wondering soy did not give me these tits the beer did that and tes toss the bouquet it look at that my beard just cried a whole bunch well that's [ __ ] crazy Bravo [Music] now as you can tell there's a lot of misinformation out there about SOI boys and like what we do what we're like bad dog I'll tell you man we're like the same as you would just eat different foods and we date hotter chicks so let me take you step-by-step through like what a day of a sewing boy looks like well first of all I wake up and I get some Fairtrade percolated coffee and then I go read pitchfork reviews that I disagree with yeah now that album sucks I can't believe they gave that a good score and I definitely want to complain about that but they don't let you leave comments on these articles so I got to go check out their YouTube channel make sure that everyone else who likes pitchfork actually hates pitchfork top ten best songs of 2017 show for real I bet these are all wrong mmm and play in a year full of disasters both natural and man-made music seemed to be the one place where unpredictability was actually a good thing I've even seen the video but wrong there it is Hurley XCX is a pop artist who loves to poke fun delete this YP pitchfork terrible is the [ __ ] list literally every song sucks baby TF was this list it's like before it even started pitchfork as [ __ ] opinion hate the substrate they list that mirar loss dislike songs are all trash this sucked on some penis JW's lol oh [ __ ] we got a real spicy bullet meat boat tofu going on in that comment section yo let me show you how a real soy boy leaves a pitchfork comment hey [ __ ] you pitchfork I'd rather stick a Morsi album up my ass bro I need a steak at the same time so I can listen to them scream at each other when they meet in the middle of my guts and before it's to spend another second watching this but all of a video I haven't seen a list this made up since reading about the negative effects that soy supposedly has and making you grow titty balls like big oil titties that commodity balls and have nipples you can milk and make titty juice come out is anyone else heard of this [ __ ] fat titties hanging off your balls that you slap around and if you cut them off they just grow back anyway keep your eyes on the skies people because that's what the government's hitting you from with the brain lasers that makes you enjoy superhero movies and father John misty songs your dumb [ __ ] balls whoa that got a little weird the end there huh I guess I'm just hungry well it's good thing I got this bullet at a momma kid haha snapchat all right now what I like to do is check in on Facebook on a political spin you know what I mean straight white men are a disease and Cher see that way we're in the revolution and I won't be a target that's just self-preservation brah now one other thing that soy boys like to do that people make fun of is yoga I'll get it check it out I do a downward dog like that for like a half hour and I'm feeling dope see yoga is important like not only for your physical health but for your mental health as well like studies have shown wait a second what the hell is this guy doing over there ah man oh man I loaded a porn video yoga anal hard [ __ ] teen that title really should have tipped me off though yeah that's my bad guys but hey while we're here let's meditate on the comment section very sexy but she needs better dick to satisfy your harsh kid it Now or Never ass looks great in this pants I say little [ __ ] Buddha is so beautiful and man that's cool and all but I think this is missing the real message here you know kind of messages only soy boy like me can put forth hey I tried to pop a nut to this but couldn't concentrate because I'm so furious served the treatment of farm animals next time you sit down for some Tyson Foods chicken or whatever just know that those chickens were grossed mutants bred and allowed to have six extra breasts and thighs grown from their torsos before someone walked into the room and kicked them to death for their weird green dr. Seuss meet your [ __ ] blood mouths anyway here's what my ding-dong does blow a little bit that's jizz and post oh there it is yeah Oh problem-centered so you know I know there's still a lot of people out there making fun of soy boys for like their diets and stuff and like I get a kid you know like it's the internet things get heated and all that but well I got your attention I thought I'd show you some of the health benefits of soy play that John hello I'm mark Messina I'm an adjunct associate professor at Loma Linda University and on behalf of the soy fruits Council oh [ __ ] this guy works for the soy food council that's tight men don't have to worry about the feminizing effects of soy because the plant estrogens and soy beans are very different from the hormone estrogen yep yep preclinical research clearly shows that soy doesn't increase estrogen levels or decreased testosterone in addition there's very intriguing evidence indicating that soy foods may reduce risk of cancer yeah that's why I shoot it in my ass bro try to find a few soy foods you enjoy try to eat about two servings per day there you go now let's check out how many soy boys are in the comments down here soy's garbage and you know it shut the [ __ ] up and go home you're a liar yo what's up with everyone hating soy man let me show homeboy how I do it hey little [ __ ] I eat so much soy that my [ __ ] has developed ovaries and I get periods on my butt once a month but I get still not on your face so fast that I forget what you look like there's a special nightmare waiting for you and your slip that are just awesome our trip something took over me for a second there brah I think I got some soy rage going on well that's all cool hey let's check back in and see if there's any more soy boys out there fighting the good fight oh [ __ ] faith goal B is soy feminizing the West doubt it son but let's play today more and more men are enrolling in Women's Studies classes more men are becoming stay-at-home dads totally so why is this happening Gerber - Mills sperm count is also way down widely publicized Danish research has found that the number of sperm in each milliliter of semen has halved since World War two if she says the word sperm one more time in front of the sperm background I am definitely gonna come why is this happening I don't know why well researchers aren't exactly sure we're down on darkness laughs oh I'll bet even your brain is beautiful oh there's one ingredient baked into most of our foods that might be causing the uptick in girly men soy yeah there it is sword boy what a beautiful thing to see a sexy women defending man's soy is chemically similar to the principal female hormone estrogen it's not soy it's j-wro New York is full of silly boys for a fifth Goldie sucks of me dick why are we still going bald maybe it's time we consider more than just our politics and our culture and ask if what's in our fridge is feeding the feminization of our society I am ready to vomit perhaps looking to whom is behind the prescription opiate epidemic and I mean Jews I mean Jews by the parentheses Jews damn imagine my surprise that this comment section would suck dick good thing I've been looking for a video to leave one of these on looks like I'm not the only bad boy in this comment section what's up dudes how about them Eagles huh yo I the worst date the other night this chick asked to borrow my phone she somehow found a way to look through my youtube comments that I've left at bro I've left some crazy [ __ ] about suck my dick this and sit on Daddy's lap and so she freaked out at me now I'm his red pill does the next guy here so obviously I smoked her with a left jab and dumped it down a trash chute before changing my name and moving to Belize hit this comment with a thumbs up if you want to talk about how cool sex is or if you want to talk about these big-ass titties coming out of my balls 9/11 and toast all right well the sun's starting to get real low so I got myself some dinner here in the form of some tofurkey these tofurkey sausages also got some little tofu cakes mmm the best thing is you don't even you don't even have to cook and Brock all right anyway so I'm just gonna kick back and relax with a couple video games and because of my dope ass soy diet I got the reflexes of a cheetah brah check this out Oh gotcha [ __ ] noob I got this guy for sure yeah the way next time you [ __ ] blood mouth isn't one for the soy boys what the [ __ ] hey what's your problem the soy Broncs like okay so like the theory right is that there's too much soy in our diet and creates testosterone imbalance wow man that's not cure it makes you grow tits oh you're wrong wrong Carl's got [ __ ] tents made of soy it's just stuff we dogs got two genders it's okay to be one in gender spectrum Mexican people I know they're very good people nope of all I mean what's a country without borders too much toys make me a sandwich Froy oh hello again my name is skelter I am the messenger of chaos eater of hope and I come to you whenever I can commandeer this young man's body to do my bidding whenever he loses control of his but I said I can tell he's not quite young anymore or a man what is all this soy sauce leave for one year this is unbelievable anyway yes I am skilled and I come to you victorious in my mission to infiltrate Hollywood oh what fun we had a hell yeah yes he has so many reputations in shambles but now just you I'd like to play with dear viewer so allow me to take over this lesson whatever it was about and then twisted into a robe of torments let's see solid boys boys sweet soy that's what this lesson was on ridiculous well there must be a way to ineke I'll see someone head still don't buy or work around money the most chaotic causality of boys eating solely online on the health of Red Queen hi there we go BTS fans slammed youtuber who called k-pop group lesbian pop group oh haha oh good and what do you know it's mark Dice himself one of my favorite little chaos angels saw now this has potential blog has caused quite the row and there's a delicious amount of hatred pouring over the whole situation like a thick gravy that was amazing tonight y'all sign the petition urging the band to sue me for what they said where racial slurs because I said they're a bunch of soy boys and said they looked like lesbian scooping or still this under his bed BTS fans respond to youtuber who insulted their AMAs performance I think you messed with the wrong fandom bro no this is the sort of soy Boy news that scale deluxe held you how shall we respond to this version why yes I do have a story from my mother that I can share yes yes it's 10 tweets long the tale of woe and despair I wonder what Mark dice would think of it witness me now mark closed his laptop with a speck and only a few tweets he had managed to put himself on the lips of the entire Korean Peninsula with the next few days bloodthirsty liberal hound dogs would blog about it spreading his name and fair mark resigned to a night of celebration he woke the next morning holding a note he didn't remember write to swirl the black pen on the yellow square thread on my way it was his handwriting perhaps amid sleep rumination withered away to nonsense by the morning light mark focused instead on angry Koreans the next day brought even more outrageous BuzzFeed and pitchfork took turns bleeding like sheep about it it also brought a new note again in his handwriting I'm closer now it read he flushed his ambience in liver causing him to act out to the doctor tonight the latest note was written in Korean and Mark only nervous because he was suddenly able to read the words I'm giving you a final gift it answered his unspoken question that night he installed the webcam in his room and slept nervously in fear of what he'd see on the tape the footage played back in night vision before him the blogs were still complaining and he was gaining followers mark released at himself full screen writing agreeable designs I'm here at red and with that came of milk in his blue the knocking continued throughout the day always three soft patient knocks mark certainly knew what would happen in that door she's spoken it it is fine laughing through bursts of static and for the first time he thought the humbling silence of regrets mark quickly said that studio equipment this would be the video that makes him famous no matter the cost as he prepared his video blending kpop fans for sending him a Korean ghost he wondered if there was a smarter play in all this for she was in his head now as the knocking grew more and more violent markets seeded that his own words got him into this mess so they must get him out he found those words coming back to and now forming the tunnel with which he could escape this madness he hit record and began speaking his film apology was accepted as a rare moment of grace for mark bloke with a grumble from where he passed out at his desk the note in his hand read you just missed me his front door was wide open what footprints leading from outside anything right half of arm's reach was it truly aa box slept soundly that night to the solace of not knowing the answer for once the next day with no no waiting for him he decided it would be best to leave the Koreans alone and stick to pissing off black people the end happened threatt yep that's just 10 tweets my mother used to tell me at bedtime all right well I guess Eric was doing a video here about the benefits of soy or something like that so it was my pleasure to ruin that and don't forget to pick up my new book tales of woe and despair by still de I mean that's not the reason I'm showing up here and [ __ ] you eat beef oh yes are you coming after mark dice like that sure who the double you know about that Betsy Davos [ __ ] what I don't know what the buns you exported you say man I'm like a ghost [Music] big money salvia big money

Channel: Internet Comment Etiquette with Erik

Views: 1,985,178

Rating: 4.8632841 out of 5

Keywords: internet comment etiquette, commentiquette, etiquette erik, horrible youtube comments, letsgotoclass, salvia erik, driving on salvia, soy boys, big money salvia

Id: ArAQxXJPD3Q

Length: 15min 12sec (912 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 05 2018

Reddit Comments

[u/Indiburger]

Are people really so insecure about their masculinity that they make fun if others for consuming soy?

Anyways bounced on my soy boys soy bean to this

[u/Staross]

Banned from r/videos from being "political" LUL.

[u/Nekoromantic]

Oh fuck yeah Thick Daddy Soylvia is back!

[u/zethien]

How much planning ahead does Erik do?!

[u/zebington]

the drinking soy sauce out of the bottle gag made me gag

love you daddy

[u/Snakeoilsage]

I guess "cuck" has run its course in the "we're projecting so hard the glare leaves a permanent shadow" crowds, so now it's off to Soy Boy Town. I don't wanna laugh too hard at this, considering soy is a big part of Asian diets and none of them seem to have seen their nutsacks invert into a fleshy crater that excretes shampoo advice, but sometimes these guys are so pathetic I just can't help myself. I've seen more machismo from a $15 "anything goes" Laotian Ladyboy than from this entire group of sweaty untouchables begging for manpoints and circlejerking each other raw in wherever everyone formerly from /r/incels goes to excrete its waste the days.

[u/Nekoromantic]

It's a good thing Skjöldr took over. I don't know that mere mortals can run head-first into the kind of idiocy of Mark Dice.

[u/YutakaAoki]

we’re just soy boys doin’ what soy boys do

[u/CelticinSeattle]

SOI BOI!!!