If You've Ever Been Ghosted or Lied to, Watch THIS

a guy promised uh he'd talk to me again but has ghosted and disappeared for months now how do i stop feeling defeated and move on after someone leaves me clinging on to their words like that look no one can leave you clinging on to their words never ever ever give someone else that power over you never give someone that responsibility of giving you closure closure is overrated you're sitting there months later waiting for closure no don't ever wait for closure from anyone else because you may never get it you may waste your entire life waiting for closure from someone why did they do that why would they just disappear why would they break my heart why would they why did they do what they did even though they said that they were had completely different intentions why did they do this instead never ever wait for somebody else's closure what you have to do is give yourself closure give yourself that closure you know what the only closure i need is that in this particular case a guy promised that he'll see me again and then didn't you may sit there how's that closure the closure is you had it confirmed that this person is not a person of their word you had it confirmed that this person's actions don't meet their words and try being in a relationship with someone whose actions don't meet their words it's going to make you deeply deeply deeply unhappy so you should be glad by the way that you're not in a relationship with that person because you know what's worse than someone not keeping to their word and you lost them someone not keeping to their word and you still have them someone you're still in a relationship with who continuously breaks their promises who continuously doesn't show up that's worse this person gave you a gift this person showed you they weren't who they said they were or that their intentions weren't what they stated and has now given you the gift of moving on and meeting somebody else but you can only give yourself that gift at the end of the day because if you're sitting there waiting for closure or clinging on to something someone said going but what happened the reality didn't match what they said then that's the reality that this person doesn't mean what they say and that you're lucky to have them out of your life anytime someone go for anyone out there any time someone ghosts you anytime someone doesn't show up for you that is a form of closure people are always showing you who they are you know maya angelou said when someone tells you who they are listen if someone tells you they're a selfish person listen if someone tells you they're a workaholic and they're never going to have any time for you listen don't ignore the things people tell you and don't ignore what you see if someone's telling you something but their actions don't match it don't ignore their actions either and by the way some of you might say well how do you know whether to pay attention to someone's actions or their words because their actions weren't saying the right thing but their words were well here's an interesting scenario imagine that well firstly when someone is telling you lots of lovely things but their actions don't match that it's your is their actions you should pay attention to right if so i'll repeat this because i'm about to flip it so watch this this you're going to remember this for the rest of your life it's really really fascinating if someone is telling you i love you i want you this that blah blah blah but they're not actually investing in you watch their actions not their words because their actions matter more but what about the situation where someone is doing all of the right things where they're almost like playing as if they're your boyfriend showing up spending time with you doing all of these things that you would think someone would do if they were really into you but they tell you i don't want a relationship you may say matt what do i do in that scenario their actions say all of the right things but their words say the wrong things you said pay attention to their actions not their words but their actions say the right things pay here's the caveat okay i want you to remember this rule because it may sound a little complicated it's not it's very simple pay attention to someone's actions more than their words unless they're telling you something that is inconvenient for them to say imagine a pharmaceutical ad i live in america now the pharmaceutical ads here are hilarious right you watch three minutes of you know two old people who used to have back pain who are now skipping in a meadow feeling fine feeling great dancing away and it tells you about all the ways this pill rid them of their back pain right at the end though as quickly as they can possibly say it they tell you all of the ways that this pill is going to make you depressed and unhappy how it's going to make give you suicidal tendencies how it might create a massive rash all over your body how you're going to have constant nausea all of these things that the pill might do to you it says very quickly at the end and it's a pharmaceutical ad wouldn't say them unless it had to it says those things because it has to say them not because they want to but because it has to say them not because it's convenient but because it's that's the the liability waiver right that in a relationship in when someone is playing your boyfriend but at the same time telling you i just really don't want a relationship that's like the disclaimer at the end of a pharmaceutical ad it's like don't look at this thing i'm saying enjoy us skipping in a meadow together dancing having the best time ever focus on that focus on that focus on that focus on what this pill is going to do for your happiness in the short term focus on that focus on that focus on that by the way i don't want a relationship and probably never will that's the part you have to listen to because that part wasn't helping him in that moment it didn't not going to make you more likely to sleep with him tonight not going to make you more likely to think he's a great guy it's the thing someone says because it's truth if someone says something that's difficult to say you can consider it as truth if someone tells you what you want to hear that's when you have to watch their actions to see if their actions actually back them up before you go did you know that i have a members club that a lot of people belong to where every month i coach them much more directly than i do here on youtube where i'm simply spouting an idea for a few minutes this is real coaching answering questions working with people in their lives and the things they want to solve if you want to come be part of this immersive experience with me go to askmh.com for a 14-day free trial you

Channel: Matthew Hussey

Views: 634,319

Keywords: Matthew Hussey, Matt Hussey, Get The Guy, How to Get the Guy, Dating Advice for Women, attract men, keep your man, dating coach, relationship coach, relationship tips, what men want, make him like you, make him love you, how to talk to men, how to attract men, meet men, get the guy, tips for women, flirting tips, texting, calling, love advice, relationships, matt hussey, matthew hussy, mathew hussey, how to flirt, ghosted, ghosting

Id: 4PQm91TH_l4

Length: 7min 52sec (472 seconds)

Published: Sat Oct 02 2021