I Helped Raise His Kids But We're Caught In a Violent & Codependent Relationship! | KARAMO

so you started your relationship with Brian as the family caretaker tell me about that um yeah so he had just recently got divorced and I was moving home and he needed help you know with his work schedule getting the kids to school and we just became really close as like a little best friends and family and love his kids and as the kids got older he moved to Tennessee and ended up needing help after a surgery and I came over to help him how old are the kids they're uh 21 17 and 14 okay so they're they're older so they're no longer in the house no they they were from Oregon so they felt more comfortable going back to school there and so and Brian he can't you know take them to the movies and do all the dad things he wishes he could do because of his surgery M it's been a lot so how has the relationship grown how did the relationship grow first of all well I mean he trusts me with his life which is his kids and um so we've always been really close and always kind of you know flirt had a flirty relationship kind of but um the kids were young he was newly single I knew that that he needed to go have his fun wild time and I stayed home with the kids and I don't know now that I we were around each other 24/7 too and we always kind of had that and the kids are older cuz at the time they probably wouldn't have understood how long you been together or how long have you been in the house being a caretaker um well since 2015 and then um we had like a short break where I he moved out here and I did my own thing and when I got here in March of 22 mhm um he had his first surgery on April 1st and then it just kind of like got closer and closer and decided like you know our feelings changed like now that the children are gone do you still have household responsibilities yeah I do every housekeeper yeah it sounds like you have all the roles yeah it's a lot and I know he has a lot of stress as well from being off of work he's always been like the provider for his family so why are you upset with Brian well it's since we've been together I knew that there were photos and I know guys will be guys it's not like a huge deal to me but I think because we're around each other so much there's been like heated escal like arguments are escalating and and he has a very loud voice sometimes so I know he's sorry he says things that he doesn't mean when he's upset and promises me he's like going to stop doing those things so it's made me feel insecure well since he's in bed like getting breakfast lunch and dinner served to him um you serve him in bed breakfast lunch and dinner it's like well because he can't walk and so that would cause a lot of arguments in front of the kids I don't like that tell me about the pictures in the phone it's a lot of pictures in the phone yeah and like I know that like he's not just sitting there doing but like he tells me he's going to get rid of them but then they just reappear and he's the one that called the show because he wants to prove to me that he's not doing this on purpose or like he's not like trying to hide them I'm not doing but she's saying I'm doing and it's so do you have explicit photos on your phone to me they're not explicit because I I they were just jokes they were just joking around I got like I was photoshopping I was doing stupid things you know and uh and to me they're not explicit to anybody else in the audience it would they would probably be explicit but they're just they're stupid ones are like my cousins my brothers and just you know dumb things you know and got it so so then what do you think the problem is in the relationship the problem is the the the bickering concept we don't know how to communicate I'm damned if I do damned if I don't you know uh I feel like if I go out there to to be with her on the TV you know like just to hang out with her she finds a reason to be upset over that and then if I'm and then if I'm in the room then I'm getting bit you know bitet for not doing nothing you know and it's like I I I I don't want to be there got it makes sense you tell my producers things escalated in August of 2023 what happened well in August uh so January 2023 I had asked a gal that I messed with back in the day you know and uh to go on the cruise I was going on a cruise and uh April she had wrote back and told me she couldn't go that was it Amy had a chance to go I asked her if she wanted to go to the cruise she didn't want to go so in August 2023 I went down there and my whole intention was just to go meet my my grandkid for the first time and so that's that's all I was going down there for I wasn't going down there to go part you know go to but then I got accused of being at a strip club I never was at a strip club so I don't know where that came from and then it's like Fast Forward I come home on the cruise and the one time I lied about like the porn you know I had a porn on my web on my phone I was embarrassed and I flipped my phone over real quick and uh but then that that's when it just I feel like it went downhill from there said everything off yeah got it and how do you feel about the fact that she has cameras in your room you know I I I I don't mind the cameras in the room what I mind is this the sneakiness like if you're going to record me record me with better equipment you know where you can see you know like you know to see that and that's what I'm not saying that as a a clowning her you know by no means but I got to the point where I put cameras in my room myself so I could put them there but I didn't know how to make three times I asked to see them they there was nothing it didn't work the batteries were dead or like there was an excuse on why I couldn't see something got it that's why you put your own in there it it wasn't even phunny like I was like sit my camera on the dresser and he would know was there you okay do you say hurtful things to each other definitely I have yeah and I'm horrible at it and I've got worse and that's just me turn into that and I hate it that's the reason why I wrote you is because I don't like the person I'm being yeah you know um well listen it's time to un loock the phone first we're going to um go with Amy all right here we go Brian wants to know if Amy has been communicating with her ex Amy says she has not my like the phone investigator search her her phone and found that Amy is telling the truth Brian you want to know if Amy has been communicating with any other men Amy says she's not my un lock the phone investigator searched her text and found that Amy is telling the truth Brian you want to know if Amy has any explicit photos on her phone Amy says she does not M unlocked the phone investigator searched her photos and found that Amy is not telling the truth w we found 21 pages of explicit photos from your phone on Amy's phone so it's the photos that I guess she got from you that is on her phone and all of these photos are nudes from Brian's phone Amy has the screenshots and recording of these photos and that's how I feel like that's this is causing this to come constantly downloading my phone because they're on her phone and then she's hooked up to my iCloud so they're constantly coming back and forth and I don't like don't I don't even touch them I don't have your iCloud password I don't have your iCloud password I had my iCloud these are the photos that you've seen already that are from your phone thank you so much they're probably this stupid like joke you know it's like um Tri they talking about tried it like he like did like some silly Photoshop ones of like to send to his cousin I me see I haven't seen but the ones that are clearly you know what are a joke and ones that aren't a joke like you can tell yeah I mean there's a lot of naked women on the phone but there there are a lot of duplicates too as well you know there's a lot of duplicates as well but even old since our relationship like got to like to a point where like he's made me feel bad like just get it rid of it so I don't have it's not my have got rid of it though that's the thing and it's like we need an investigator to figure out why they're getting there then I mean I don't I don't like I don't well well we can tell you that I don't think that the the clouds are redownloading these to your phone believe that yes so that's not happening um you see the photos um okay well Brian let's get to your phone let's see we unlock here Wham you want to know if Brian has any explicit photos on his phone Brian says he does not my unlock the phone investigator search his photos and found that Brian is telling the truth about he he doesn't have any new exclusive photos Amy you want to know if Brian has been communicating with other women Brian says he's not my unlock the phone investigator search his apps and found that Brian is not telling the truth he has two deleted dating apps Tinder and happen and was last active on Tinder in September 2023 and happened June of 2023 and were you aware of that um I probably went on it and checked it and then I deleted it got it okay Amy you want to know if Brian has been on any questionable websites Brian says he's not my un locked the phone investigator search his phone and found that Brian is not telling the truth truth Brian has been on dating profiles on four dating sites including Amish dating cougar dating dating yeah is that um that wasn't recent though that was recent okay no those were such a long time ago like just when I was wilding out that's what you know so you know about these as well I what what were the other two um Alma dating cougar dating cook up dating and dating fish.com um I think it was I don't okay Amy you want to know Brian has been deleting evidence from his phone Brian says he is not by unlock the phone investigator search his phone and found that Brian is not telling the truth he deleted 1,54 text now messages he has also deleted one from recent context and one from another messaging app text you know about those okay no she could you could show her everything I know I'm the interesting part is to be honest with you I feel like even if you knew what they are it wouldn't really concern you I want to know I know for I I'm 100 50% positive that it was way before me and her be became even an item and then text now is just one of those apps that I would use to communicate with her when she's blocked or you when she blocks me or something like that I never use text now I always use my phone well my producer told me that my unlock the phone investigator also found a video that they want me to see Brian I said leave me alone and look at you keep breaking in you fat get the away from me I am miserable because of you get I am in 30 you can die and get the this is my room I've been here for two years you can leave watch you will be the one to go bring them here and watch when everything is broken from the so so you two get violent it's that's fine I don't care you two get violent it's gotten where the doors are broken yeah it's got it's gotten to that point where like when you yell at me I instantly shut down and leave and walk away and I'm leaving you I don't want to do this no more to the point where like I lock myself in a room and it doesn't move so I'm going to tell you this before I even saw that video this only confirmed what I was about to say you two are in a very codependent relationship but both of you are holding on to something and getting something from each other that is completely what you're codependent to but you're so unhealthy and the saddest part for me is that it's breaking down both of your self-esteem I even just watched your body language Brian in that video of how you walked away and I'm not saying you didn't say horrible things to um I'm sure that you said completely horrible things right after I heard that I know I'm horrible and you know like I that's the reason I like emailed you is because I I wanted so let me show you what just happened right there and I appreciate you emailing me so what I'm going to do is try to identify the behavior for you so you can see how you can be better you know you're horrible see that codependency is making you horrible and so every time you say I know I'm horrible you just start to bring your self-esteem down more and more which then makes that fear of what else could be out there bigger and bigger and you don't get out of it and you're basically breaking yourself down every single day you as well I mean you're in a cycle of making yourself feel worse and I feel like when I was working you know before the foot thing is like everything was perfect and then it's like ever since I've been stuck home it's like I'm I it it sucks you know I get that and it just it's made it worse and you know it's past worse now it's past worse because to see your doors broken to see how y'all are communicating with each other y'all are one step away from one of y'all making a rash decision and one of y'all ending up in jail and I totally agree and I've told him that I was like I'm either we have to go our separate ways because I feel like one of us is going to end up in jail or her and I don't want that do you have do you have the courage for one of you to leave I that's the question I want to make it work like I really know like I know him and I know him before like this when we're around each other like I want to make you my question you don't have the courage to leave do you have the courage to leave I I got the I got the courage to do whatever makes anybody happy like I would do whatever question do you have the courage leave to make yourself happy I don't I don't want to know what life is without her you know because I've always been around her and you know if we have to be friends that you know i' would rather be friends and see the thing is is until you two stop feeling like you have to be responsible for each other you're never going to start learning how to be responsible for yourself I agree and the thing is the thing that makes me sad about this is that you're it's really truly affecting your self-esteem I'm watching it I'm watching it and it breaks my heart because I see two people who used to be vibrant who used to be happy I still see the glimmer in both of your eyes and I see it slipping away I really do and it breaks my heart because you shouldn't have this you shouldn't have this yeah I know you know it has it's like it makes sense when in the fact that I've been I'm like I love you so much I don't want to take care of your feet for the rest of my life it makes all of it make sense to me I'm not again I don't know if you've noticed I haven't blamed one of you for being the bad person he's not a bad guy at all and you're not a bad woman either you've just gotten to a place where you're so codependent that you're now hurting each other you're hurting each other over and over again both of you have tears in your eyes well because I love him and like I know like that's why we're like reaching out for help because like we want to I promise you I'm giving you the best help I can trust me if I thought y'all could stay together I would give you some tips on how to do it that is that is what I would do for you so do yourselves a favor and talk about how you're going to work together and be intentional about getting out of this codependent relationship and the step to doing that is y'all got to separate notice I didn't say break up because maybe you might be able to make the love work but it's not going to work with you all being responsible for each other in that same house I wish you both the best of luck I'm going to talk to you some more backstage so we can really talk but I really wish you the best of luck all right seriously [Music]

Channel: Karamo Show

Views: 78,321

Keywords: Karamo

Id: QvzBIbX0V54

Length: 15min 20sec (920 seconds)

Published: Thu May 02 2024