I Forced Myself to Speedrun Klingon in Duolingo

it's been a while do it do it do it i don't know if i can do it do it the pressure do it the weight the responsibility are my skills up to par am i good enough i just tried it and it's not that hard i have to do this i have to i love peer pressure i'm one of the duolingo speedrun champs debatably sort of i can do this after all it's just klingon so here we are i am so excited yes now a lot has changed in the one and a half years since i last sped run duolingo i'd like to think that i've grown as a person and i would like to begin by issuing a formal apology i made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgment and i don't expect to be forgiven i'm simply here to apologize what i said about klingon was obviously unplanned the reactions you saw in the video were raw they were unfiltered there's a lot of things i should have done differently but i didn't and for that from the bottom of my heart i am sorry with that being said i have not sat idle during my time away from duolingo my friends i have been cultured yes i would like to publicly thank aquarius lover on ao3 for educating me on the star trek universe thank you i know so much now that i didn't know before does that mean i know what klingon is no have i watched a single episode of star trek also no will that stop me from getting the world record for duolingo klingon first checkpoint any percent definitely not i have 100 confidence that this is an attainable and healthy goal that will totally not blow up in my face and cause severe emotional trauma so the rules are simple complete each lesson unlocking the tree as progress is made the clock will begin once i click on the language and will stop upon completion of the first checkpoint exam easy peasy all right let's just rip off the band-aid and get to it here we go learn klingon from english 309k active learners who why um i'm this is going to be awful this could be awful okay choose your path beginners start at the pronunciation lesson advanced learners take a short test okay listen the last time i took a placement test it didn't go uh too well i would say that it was detrimental to the speed run however i've learned my lesson so we're gonna do sounds one but before we do that i have to wait for my laundry alarm to go off in the next 28 seconds so let's go ahead and let's get started yeah it i like how all of them are like kind of like it's like okay this is definitely not english but we just get to like it like it's just it like just like the regular word that's not even how is this a question on duolingo there's no okay okay what a rush like the first time i climbed everest excuse me what what what kind of duolingo lore is happening here also this looks like a man like clinging onto her head if you like look at it a certain way like this looks like the pants and this is like his arms like wrapping around anyways anyways anyways so fast so fast so speedy easy that was easy that was so simple gotta do this four more times hell yeah the klingon letters oh no why odd why oh i literally didn't even answer it correctly and it gave it to me anyways that's just how much duolingo loves me so what what this like okay that went from zero to one hundred what i was getting into the hang of it you know with all like the eyes but like what is this i'm gonna just guess i'm guessing whoa oh my god i'm so good i'm so good all right one more in this category here we go no idea this could be any of these you right process of illumination hold on let's go back to our test taking skills so it doesn't it's not number three it's probably not number one either this one looks cooler so i'm gonna click it you hell yeah i'm so good i'm just wow i'm so smart you know you know here's the thing could i click the tips button yes yes i could would i maybe like actually learn something from it perhaps however i don't want to know about klingon you know i have no desire oh that was it we're done with that oh easy easy we're going so fast how are we doing so far we're only 15 minutes in this is like fantastic children poo poo oh my god poo poo i'm obsessed i'm obsessed so i guess pooh is like uh adding an apostrophe s not an apostrophe s who is like pluralizing the word i see i see i do not see i'm just oh fish oh that's a good word wait say it again i like it i like it a lot you jumped okay okay klingon i will jump a normal sentence that every human being has said i'm starting to get it i think i i i think i understand a little bit you run and we jump wait i'm not gonna look at it i'm gonna think of it oh my god i was right i was right i didn't even have to look at the screen i'm so good i'm fluent i'm fluent put me in the star trek universe right now i'm ready oh apparently i'm not ready duolingo has just told me that i uh i don't want to be clear what's duolingo gonna tell me next i die i die i don't want to die i feel threatened i feel threatened i'm not i don't feel safe anymore you are alive i'm alive for now okay torg lives oh that's good torg is still alive in this scenario tork dies he dies oh my god rest in peace torg if klingon the klingon language is beautiful no it is not no it is not you're incorrect be clip you are stupid excuse me excuse me how dare you my pride i am wounded my soul it hurts how could duolingo do this to me mara died but torg lived oh twerk is alive still but mara's dead no that's fine we didn't like mara anyways torig was our boy he was our man mara no no don't know who she is so that's plural let's see click bet klingons are not stupid agreed well actually no not agreed i'm being like gaslit into liking klingon this can't be true this can't be happening to me all right easy easy easy easy touring is young and mara oh no oh no we finally got an exercise where we have to write and cling on okay okay we can do this we can pull together our two brain cells and come up with an answer oh my god we did it we did it we did it that was loud why did i clap so loud she killed molar who is molar we have more characters now uh wharf all right so we were introduced to a bunch of characters there i mean we have wharf duros candice was that his name candace uh torg and mara admire kayla's what do you mean that's like literally the same thing i'm gonna report that i'm gonna report that my answer should be accepted the soldier all right let's go faster faster faster faster this is a speed run after all the warriors killed kayla's oh my god kayla's is dead say it isn't so all right easy dun dun done another lesson in the bag i'm like getting so tired of this how long have we been doing this for 43 minutes ugh that's 43 minutes too long the enemies respect warf warf my beloved worf's my new favorite goodbye twerk hello wharf they are going to hate oh my god oh my god i hate this i hate this i hate this haters are going to hate you can tell that this duolingo course was written in like 2014. awesome admired himself excuse me what no thank you melor i don't want to know that about you uh kayla's and lucar admire each other oh my goodness is this like a love triangle isn't kayla's dead didn't we find out that he's deceased i don't remember i'm not keeping up with this the robots repaired each other no thank you that's some no no no i don't want to know about sentient robots no thank you are we okay now we are halfway through and it's only taken us you know 48 minutes that's pretty good oh my goodness this one has six lessons in it ugh should we take a break until i get my laundry no we have to keep going we have to push onwards we have to keep going moving forward speed running let's go let's go let's go let's go start vocab one i killed kayla's oh my god i killed kayla's duolingo killed kayla's the plot thickens tord can't swim oh my god tork what are you doing go down to the ymca torg learn how to swim we are speeding through this which is the point of a speed run so good job me let's finish this lesson and then we'll go pick up the laundry that's what we'll do okay did you see them i feel like my pronunciation is getting better actually the more i get immersed in the language the more i'm picking it up alright nice we finished that lesson time for me to go get my laundry hell yeah pause the timer only took us an hour we only have like one two three four things left easy easy i love the subplot of me like doing my laundry during this you know every good speed run has a moment where you need to go outside and do your laundry like what would a speedrun be without multitasking it was this one right yeah all right see the key to do lingo speedruns is not to actually know the language it's just to memorize the questions because they will inevitably repeat themselves so like are you a robot see like i didn't know what that meant i just you know context clues [Music] it is a targ what is a targ what is a targ in post i will put up what a target because i'm intrigued you know i want to know what it is but not enough to stop this speed run we recognize you but you don't recognize us oh my god the t the drama the telenovela levels of drama in this duolingo lesson oh my goodness are we done with this lesson all right nice nice nice nice two more to go lesson zero three zero of six oh we'll do the shorter one first [Music] i need a nap can we just like pause the speed run for six hours i feel like then it wouldn't be in a nap it would just be like me going to bed what lesson are we even on oh locations oh that's right because they have to use like fake ones because there are no real places that use klingon where is mara's robot mara has a robot is it like a detroit become human situation meet you on chronos who talks like this is this how they talk in the show because if so incorrect oh we're so close to being done we're so so close i just want this to be over is that a mcdonald's oh they have a mcdonald's in star trek the moons orbited the planet why orbited past tense is this part of the star trek lore i would not know i know nothing about star trek i've come to realize other than torg i hope torg is a real character the restaurant is near the great hall i love the strategy that i've developed for this i just like read the thing backwards i'm on my way right now oh i forgot a word whatever listen it's getting late was that the last lesson are we on the no of course we're not of course there's one more there's always one more i hate this i hate this i hate this let me out let me be free the bar is between the kitchen and bathroom all right and that was the last lesson right oh my goodness oh my goodness we're so ready i'm i'm oh my god i'm ready to be done with this i need to be done with this it's an hour 42 minutes in that's like about on pace for a world record isn't it woman uh oh no oh no this is not going well why is it like an actual test i don't know skip did i pass oh oh my goodness i completed the checkpoint somehow how did i pass that i literally didn't even write any correct answer i'm just that good i'm just that good and our time is an hour 43 minutes 40 seconds and 14 milliseconds is that a world record probably has anyone else sped run klingon and duolingo probably not so i count this you know as an absolute win what are the takeaways of doing this this speedrun in klingon well i've learned a lot about uh torg and mara and wharf absolutely love wharf huge fan of wharf we are besties wharf and i and also torg i feel like we've really come to understand each other over this past hour and 43 minutes now would i say that i understand a single thing about klingon no i still have no idea what it is they were talking about kronos and earth and space stations and these animals called tarks are they called tarks the fact that i even know it's an animal now i mean astounding this was such a waste of time this was always a waste of time but anyways thank you guys so much for watching for joining me on this journey um my hate for klingon continues i hate this language i hate everything about it but you know i um do i appreciate the people who made this language yeah i feel like i do because this this took a lot of work i'm sure which is kind of cool you know people put in a lot of effort and even all like the sounds you could tell that it was recorded by people like at their house and stuff which is pretty awesome like that people took the time out of their day to like really make a language that people would be into learning i guess so that's cool but the fact that they chose klingon awful but anyways thank you guys so much for watching i really appreciate all the support on the other duolingo video i hope that you guys like this one yeah leave a comment let's chat about it if anyone has sped run any duolingo language i would love to know about it i'm obsessed with this i hope that this can be a speedrun.com category someday so uh have a great day everyone bye bye

Channel: twin fettuccine

Views: 485,406

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Id: zOHh0h1ITAo

Length: 16min 14sec (974 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 13 2022