All right. We're checking out the only game where you get to play jump
rope with limb-severing lasers. It's Stair Dismount. Stair Dismount is one of those games
that puts you in a position to hurt yourself real bad. There's about a million
different ways for you to kill yourself, and you also get to decide
where you spar to kick your own body. So the plan is,
once we get past like the warm-up here, I wanna get 1 million points
on every single board that we play. That's the challenge. I do also appreciate that they tell
you every single bone that you break on the way down. There they are. He's fine. I think I severed an arm. So in order to get
the most amount of agony here, I can already tell what you want to do,
is you need to pick a side, not like, uh, not like here,
the old mafia-style kneecap. And you don't want to hit him too hard. Maybe like right there. That-that right there. Look at how perfect this is,
hmm, lower back break. You can see it very clearly. I managed to miss every
single thing on the way down. I just wanna see what happens
if you like very slowly slides through as it-- there in. Oh, my, ugh, my forearm, come back. [laughs] Oh, this is working out real good. You know what, a million, we may need
to go for 10 million eventually, 'cause I have a feeling
that 1 million is coming out. Yes. I went from missing every
single column to hitting everyone. That right there is the upper rib cavity. I think I broke myself in half. Oh, 1.4 million. Just getting that like it's no big deal. I think the best part is-- What? You can just be a box? You can pick so many different characters. You ready for this? This isn't just jumping into traffic. This is jumping down traffic. Starting off with the rib fracture there, looks like we're going to be squeezing,
ugh, between two vehicles,
worked out quite well. Ricochet off the left-hand side, go ahead and clean out my ear
with my own ankle. Then, uh-oh,
I think we're gonna get stuck here, or I'll just leave the board entirely. All right, starting off at about 400,000. Not bad but I think that we could
do a lot better on the board like this. I love how angry my one limb is. It's like, "That's not enough points
I'm gonna get you more, Gray." Thank you, right femur. Are we done yet? Nope. I definitely want to see
if I can get that first ramp. So in order to do this, let's
kinda like arch ourselves a little bit. Right like that. That should be perfect. Okay, scorpion-ing right away. Of course, I completely missed
the ramp except my toe, ugh. Squeezing through those cars
is so satisfying. I have a feeling we're already
going to be at more points than we were last time. This is looking good, as long as I can kind of careen left off of the blue car just like that,
that's perfect. Then a nice slow maneuver
around the yellow car. Oh, we got it. Hold on. Here it is. We're jumping it. [growls] What happened? I lost both my arms. I don't know why. I love how this sign is just chilling
out here, kinda like halfway down. How am I supposed to get up there 'cause
I've lost all of my momentum? I don't even know what happened. Like my arms are somewhere
back by the original ramp. Not gonna be
happy until I can get this ramp. Okay, now I'm way over to the right. That's got to be it, right, except for the pink car
that got in the way. I've already lost a leg. I love how my leg's just going on ahead. It's like,
"I'll meet down the finish line, Gray." My leg is the thing
that's getting all the points now. My torso's not actually moving. It's like, "Huh,
you broke your leg again, Gray." I know. Actually getting 200,000 points
with one single limb isn't that bad. Here it is. The full jump. This is new height. I don't think I've ever-- Whoa. That could've been so much
better if I would've stayed in the middle of the roadway
and not gone off to the right. Hmm. You see how many flips that was? I'm pretty sure that was
like a half a dozen. We're going straight for the million here. 700,000, 800,000, come on,
900,000 off of this backbreaker. Yep, right there. And then kinda twist around,
heel to the back of the skull, and you've got your cool million. This is called, "Hold on, Rose." I appreciate that it's the Titanic,
if the Titanic-- Puh, was specifically made
to injure people as much as possible. Ugh. I'm not even sure which way
I'm supposed to be kinda moving. I think it slowly yeah, it's slowly sliding knee to the left. There's also the gigantic propellers
just kinda chilling out on the bottom
if I can get to them. Ugh. Yeah. Oh, I got severed
by the propeller right off the bat. We haven't got in a million yet though. We're just at 660. All right. So I think we really
need to pick a side here. I'm gonna go out to the right. All right. There's the backflip. Starting off good. You want time this well, too,
because you want to get, yeah, see, shocked into the air
as high as humanly possible. I'm going all the entire ship. Now, the ship's gonna sink without me. This is like one of those instances
where Leo was like, "Hey, Rose, I'll be right back." And she's like, "Okay, I'll wait." He just jumps in the water. All right. Kick the foot out. We're gonna try and go down a little slower here so that I have time to get to the yeeter. There we go. That's the yeeter that was perfect. There goes a leg. Make sure that my skull keeps me
going down the middle here because, without this propeller, I don't think that there's a way
for us to get a million. Oh, never mind. I just got stuck
inside of the underside of the stairs. This is looking perfect. Oh yeah. Oh, we're on top of the ship. We're riding the smokestacks at this point. Hey, arch around the side
and we should be perfect for the prop. Yeah-yeah-yeah. That's the stuff. 700,000 come on 800,000. It's actually gonna be
kind of difficult for me to figure out how to get this million. Hey, one of my arms just, I don't know if it got
embarrassed by me or what? Hmm. Maybe if I try the back of the skull. Get that forward, that forward flip. I almost caught
that right in the groin too. [chuckles] Hey, off to the side. I forgot about those weird cords there. I missed the prop. I really wanna get my groin caught
right in the middle of this pillar here. Right, like that. Perfect. See that'll-that'll get
you a nice clean 100,000. Okay. We're not starting
off with a lot of points here. So I'm not really sure
that this can be the one. And of course, somehow I make
it through the entirety of the prop losing both of my arms in the process
and still not getting over 750,000. I'm gonna punch him in the elbow just because I think
that that'll get us the spiral effect. Say, lined up for the yeeter. The yeeter just ripped off one of my legs. That's fantastic. It also yeeted me out into the Atlantic. We're going skull first
'cause I haven't done that yet. I thought maybe that would provide
me a bit more control. Also, I haven't done the right side. If I'm gonna get-if I'm gonna get
like mauled I might as well get mauled on all the different sides. No, God. I haven't even started
yet and I just got ripped in half. At this point,
my arm is doing whatever it wants. Well,
there goes my-there goes by lower half. We'll meet up again. Say, look. [laughs] Technically you gotta get twice
as many points because you have twice as many body parts flying around. Right.
Getting a million on this is super tough. I think what we need
is a different character. I don't know what I'm looking at here. It's called Mr. Stalwart, but it looks like a guy
with a tic-tac has a chest cavity. All right. Let's see how stalwart you are. Not too stalwart considering he got
ripped in half the first 10 seconds. Vitamins. What are those? All right.
I found the guy who I think can do it. He basically looks like a slice
of American cheese with legs, but he definitely scores
points very quickly because all of his limbs
just decide to nope out. You can see all I have left is one leg. All right. We're at 300,000 already. If I can hit a prop, we can get 700 easy. There it is. That's the last leg by the way. [chuckles] Okay.
This is-this is easily my best one yet. We're at 400,000. We haven't even gotten to the prop. So this is looking good. 500. Come on, baby, give me that million. 700. Come on, come on 800, 900. This is happening-this is happening. No, look at the distance. I've almost made it all the way
to Norway for God's sakes. I don't know what limb is still breaking,
but I'm giving them a raise. Whichever one it is 'cause
we're past a million. Yeah. I love how that one limb
is actually still racking me up points. You're ready to see something insane. It's called mosh pit. It's a gigantic eye chilling out in the middle of a violent-
a violent speaker. And all it does is just keep vomiting
you and your limbs up in the air. This is the stuff nightmares are made of. It may sound like getting
a million on this is easy, but it's actually kind of hard
because the problem is it's constantly trying
to throw you out of the ring. So you kind of have to ricochet
back inside somehow. There we go. But I think we're gonna get
the million straight off the bat here. 700,000 multiple flips. I'm gone. I'm completely Is this-is this like the home
of the devil down here? Oh, come on. I love how every
once in a while it doesn't even like-- I don't even know
what bone it's talking about. It's like you broke something
and I'm like, "Well, what bone?" And it's like, "Does it matter?" Okay, now we've got
our million 1.3 million actually. Okay.
This one is actually gonna be very hard. This is called bird watching. You have to murder yourself by landing
on top of a bunch of gigantic seagulls. [laughs] [ding] So, that was-- Wow, that was. Like, a perfect landing on the wing there. I'm using the dude with a gigantic head. I figured if there's more skull
to annihilate, I would get more points. Ah, my head just went into the ground. Where is it? Oh, I'm just traveling. The weight of my brain is carrying me home. Uh, I, um-- I think I broke the game. I think that my head is too heavy
because I'm still just sliding along, and the game won't end. [beep] Okay. There's gotta be
a way to get a million on this. Oh, that's a terrible start. I've gotta hit, like, at least three
seagulls to have any chance. All right. How about the full power hit? If I can hit that first seagull,
that would be great. Okay. that's two seagulls. That's not bad. Unfortunately, all I have left is my head. There comes the rest of my body. Pulling in about 500,000,
but, yeah, my head just, like, evaporates down to the underworld. I need more surface area to get murdered. All right, dollar store Gumby,
get back in there. All right. I got plenty of-- [laughs] No. Hips, come back. The entire top of my body
just stayed behind. Alrighty, let's try that again. Uh, let's arc over to the right. Here we go. Yeah,
that's gonna get that first bird for sure. Perfect. All right.
Give him a little pat on the head. You're doing a great job, and second bird. Nice. Now, as long as I can, like,
slide on off this bird, we'll be fine. Okay, I'm riding the bird like a dragon. All right. First bird right on the beak,
and I managed to miss everything else. Go a little bit higher. Go by the arm. Do a nice spiral. Here we go. Okay, there's the first bird. Nice. Florida would be proud. I think we're gonna get
this wing over here with our pelvis. [shouting] Oh yeah, that's nice. Okay, and then ricochet off of the stone. The entire body just disassembles,
and we've got our million points. Okay, that was actually a little bit
easier than I thought it would be. Okay. The time has come
for the most ridiculous board there is. This is called Reach for the Lasers. Oh, all the laser's do is bring me agony. Look at that-- Look at the spins. Yeah. This one actually might be more difficult to get a million points than, I think-- And you have to land in the center. All right. Starting off with about 600,000. That ain't bad. [ding] I'm gonna do a very light hit. I wanna be right in the middle for this. Ooh, yeah. Oh, these lasers taste like Capri-Sun. So good. And beauty. Hmm. Haven't even lost a limb yet. How about that? Okay. Come on. Get in the middle. Get in the middle. Get in the middle. No. Getting inside of that is gonna
be super tough. Okay, but we're getting closer. We're at 660 now. Do, like, right on the top of the head. Maybe I can get
more downward force like that. All right. Yeah. Looking good. I think I'm hitting, like,
every single laser on the way down. Multiple spirals. That was my leg and my groin. And, okay. Doing good. 640. This is gonna be it. Oh, this is it. This is it. Oh. 1.3 million. And just because I said I was gonna do it. There's the million,
but I'm also inside of the cup. I'm gonna go ahead and take the human
slurpee I've been made into and drink it. Anyway, folks, hope you enjoyed
this episode of Stair Dismount. Until next time, stay foxy and much love.
