How Your Fears Prevent You From Reaching Your Career Potential | Gerald Walsh | TEDxMSVU

I'd like you to imagine for a moment that you're 82 years old 82 being the average life expectancy of men and women in Canada when you're 82 years old if you thought about it for a moment you'd realize that the amount of time you have left well it's growing short and when things come to an end like a relationship a job your time and university or for sure your life it's natural to reflect back and think was it was it really worth it when you're 82 years old reflecting back on your life in particular the career section of your life you think you might take one of two paths might go like this yep I had I had a pretty good career I did interesting work I was given lots of opportunity to grow and learn I was always proud of the organizations that I worked for I respected my bosses my co-workers they were great as well many become great friends I had nice balance between my home life and and work and sure I would have liked have made more money but you know I was adequately paid for for what I did I'd give that kind of an a minus B plus sort of grade actually 82 year-olds are not as anal as students about marks just so you know or your thinking might go down a second path something like this holy you know what I did spend 40 years doing that half my life I remember getting a pit in my stomach every Sunday night thinking about going to work on Monday morning and I live for the weekend by far my favorite day of the week was Friday I couldn't stand my bosses and my coworkers they weren't any better and I remember that cartoon I saw once where a bunch of factory workers were going into a plant and punching their time cards and there was a big sign there that said remember to check your brain at the door that reminded me of me my work was so boring but what could I do I had miles to feed mortgages to pay and then I turned 40 and you my desire for a great career was gone because I had all those years of pensionable servers accumulated how could I leave now and that's why I started counting down the days to retirement yep back then 25 years times 365 days didn't seem like that much even bought when I was big wall calendars every day at 4:30 when I left to put a big X another day gone did that 9120 times then I retired unfortunately there are a lot more people like that than you think I read a lot of personal growth books one I keep close by is this one five secrets you must discover before you die bye bye dr. John is oh and in the book is or talks a lot about regret regret that people have at the end of life and he and other researchers have concluded that you will not regret the things you may have tried and failed at but you will regret the things you always wanted to do but never did so I've been very curious about that given my profession as a recruiter and a career coach why do people have regrets about career at the end of life and to me it boils down to a four letter word it's fear in fact most of you in this room if you're like your parents and others before you you will lead what I call a fear-based career meaning that most of your actions and your decisions throughout your life will be governed by some underlying fear that prevents you from achieving the things that you want to achieve so I want to learn more about this I sent an email no to her email lists a couple of months ago Tomasz doing this TED talk on fear and ask for some examples examples of how fears have held you back and the few minutes we have today I want to share some of their stories with you where's personal wanna tell you about is Jennifer Jennifer is actually a professional accountant you know late 30s now Jennifer grew up in less than stellar circumstances her father was an alcoholic her mother held a series of menial jobs because they're in a rural community the family had a personal bankruptcy in the past of the experiences economic hardship to her credit Jennifer told me that at age 16 she decided that she didn't want to be like her mother she knew that if she stayed where she was and did nothing she'd be working her whole life at the gas station or at the convenience store so without family support she came to the city applied for university get in the business program did well learn she liked accounting when she graduated she should have joined a small CA firm did her normal studies and then it came time to write what are called the uniform final exams now the uniform final exams are national exams written by professional accountants very rigorous exams in fact was so rigorous the only one and two people who write the exam actually pass and many professional accountants take two three or four times before they actually pass jennifer passed on her first try and to this day 15 years later she still believes that was a fluke she thinks the marker made a mistake so I asked her why she told me that because like her mother Jenna she believes deeply that she's not worthy of success she and I asked her further to explain that she asked her how it has impacted her career that not feeling worthy of success she told me how she's behind career-wise right behind her peers because she doesn't apply for jobs that she would be qualified for thinking she's not going to get the job when she does apply her self-doubt and lack of confidence shows through she performs well and doesn't get the job kind of confirming her first point salary wise she's making far less money than her peers mostly because she's reluctant to ask for raises along the way and she even told me that at one point she was looking for some performance feedback from her boss but she couldn't bring herself to ask her boss for a meeting because she was afraid of what the boss was going to say to her so Jennifer to her credit I mean she's she's a pretty dog a person she's gonna struggle her whole life she's she's come across some strategies that are mitigating some of these fears but I suspect she will struggle this her whole life next person while I tell you about is Joe Joe has an ordinarily high fear of being judged by others so Joe like Jennifer's well-qualified person he's a marine biologist masters in environmental science he worked ten years with an environmental consulting firm and unfortunate because of the industry downturn Joe lost his job it was really only is his only job after graduation and he's out there being interviewed and he has this very high level of interview anxiety that's him comparing his his performance now being anxious interviews is normal but if it carries on too far it's problematic so one thing where Joe was very concerned about he told me when he met that he is afraid of looking stupid you know they think he's not qualified and he won't get the job so this equation that he's he's working through so what he does to prepare for interviews he told me he writes the anticipates every question is going to be asked writes down word-for-word all of his answers to get ready now that's not a bad strategy but the problem is is when Joe gets in the interview if he gets off script a little bit forgets what he's supposed to say or if he's asked a question that he hasn't asked a question that he wasn't hasn't anticipated he panics essentially so he doesn't have strategies built up to be cold composed calm and not panic so in his interviews he told me he's stilted he's structured his authentic self is not coming through and he doesn't get hired for the jobs I spoke to Jacqueline to Jacqueline Jacqueline's a very seasoned media relations public relations communications specialist she advises senior level businesspeople government people elected officials politicians on high-level policy matters and strategic matters they appreciate her bite she gives good advice I just told me that when that she hears that being conveyed in the public forum such as in press conferences or in in the newspapers and other media releases she begins to doubt herself and she has what she has self diagnosed or defined as what she calls unsubstantiated influence I thought that was a clinical term at first but it turns out Jennifer's issue is that her Jacqueline's issue is that see she is five years of university education but she doesn't have a degree she doesn't actually think she's smart enough to be giving advice to people who are more qualified than her she went on to explain a situation was really arose about a year ago she was working for actually a politician he was running for election she she gave him some advice and he spoke about it publicly he picked up in the media and was heavily criticised in the media so normally communications people are behind the scenes there unnamed and unmentioned but this case the reporter picked up Jennifer's Jacqueline's name and kept illustrating that in fact she didn't have a qualification so she couldn't actually stand the ridicule in the embarrassment she quit her job she went into his shell she's been actually unemployed for a year and she's now applying for jobs as a receptionist because quote/unquote they are safe no one can actually really kill me in these jobs even employers are asking when she applies for these jobs why you're well qualified based on your experience why are you applying for these jobs and she told me she lies she lies them she basically says it's an easier commute better work/life balance and so on so I'm not sure what's gonna happen with Jacqueline I learned about Cory Cory was a mid-forties vice-president distribution for a print media newspaper company he'd been there for what ten years had a great job he was making about $200,000 a year and that industry went through some downsizing also he lost his job and Cory could not accept the fact that he was fired he because his whole status and identity was tied up in his job he he he didn't tell anybody we told very few people that he'd actually lost his job which is not a smart strategy when you're looking for work we should be as widespread as possible he would only apply for jobs that were at his old level or above and he had received a severance package and he had some savings but what happened since he also didn't change his lifestyle he still belonged to all the clubs and so on that he blew through his savings in three years and so he now is about fifty years of age broke living in his parents basement so his his whole status identity was tied up in his work there were many jobs that he didn't even apply for that would have paid they're a good job as 125 or 150 but he couldn't bring himself because his whole identity was was tied up in his work there were many others there was Linda who always feels a sense of powerlessness the root of that primarily is I think in her in her childhood were her father was she told me very verbally abusive and belittling to to her and even though she's mid-career now well-qualified has an MBA and has held some fairly senior jobs any time she has a boss who's a bit more aggressive than they should be she she backs off feels powerless that things are gonna be taken from her because Brian who's had a about 50 years of age had a whole career in business development in sales he's only recently discovered this about himself he's like he's had an average career performance-wise but he's discovered this that he's feels sales is a disreputable profession you even though he's doing it he's actually ashamed of what he's doing there's Julie who's a director of human resources for an organization was invited to sit at the leadership table with the president and the owner and the and the vice president's all the time and although she's only a director but whenever conversation got to a level that she didn't understand or couldn't comprehend she wondered why she was there she was feeling like an imposter and in fact she told me that the president said you know I'm happy to promote you to vice president of human resources but she declined that offer saying I'm not quite ready yet and there's Alan who's had a very very successful career in retail store management his stores are always hit through sales targets and achieved the profitability targets yet he's got a very very high level of fear of being fired at all times there are a lot of these stories but I'll leave you this question are you are you going to let your fears prevent you from achieving your career potential and as you contemplate your answer it asks you to consider three things first how you define career potential it's totally up to you you own the definition not your parents not your bosses not your peers you you might define career potential as making a lot of money working for a big company you might define it as working for a not-for-profit in a third world country you might define it as working a regular nine-to-five job where you can leave your worries at the office so your evenings and weekends are your own it doesn't matter one definition is not better than the other many of you in the room are early in your career so you may not have a definition identified yet but please start to work on it before others to find it for you the second point is about your fears what you have fears I have fears we all have fears even people who we think are fearless have fears the question is what are we going to do about them so like some of the people I mentioned here acknowledging your fears is an important step identifying in particular how those fears are impacting your life and your career and then developing some strategies to overcome them is important and the final point is I'd like to bring you back to your 82 year old self you don't want to be that person who has regrets at the end of life when you're 82 it's not impossible but it's hotter than likely that you're gonna write that book start that company or go for that job remember there's a great temptation to play it safe through your life it's familiar it's secure it's comfortable but you will regret the risks you never took so please eat courageous deal with your fears leave no regrets thank you [Applause]

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 1,655

Rating: 5 out of 5

Keywords: TEDxTalks, English, Canada, Business, Career, Fear, Life, Psychology, Work

Id: ik6FAJPuvPk

Length: 15min 29sec (929 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 24 2017