HOW TO CURE INSOMNIA ONCE AND FOR ALL WITH PROVEN SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH!

hey everyone okay so today's video is a slightly different one and it is on the topic of sleep issues and insomnia now in this video um i'm going to be interviewing joseph pannell and joseph is a best-selling author he does one-on-one consultations and therapy for people with sleep issues like myself that's how i found joseph i found his book on amazon i actually downloaded the audible version of it and then decided to have one-on-one therapy with him which was done over online it was done via zoom and things like that and it was and is incredibly helpful throughout this interview um i'll be interviewing joseph but also you can hear a little bit about the troubles that i've had with my sleep as well throughout there is a little bit of muffledness in this video where i'm asking some questions so hopefully i can deal with that with some text on the screen but i really hope you find this this video interesting it sleep is something that we all do and a huge amount of us up to 40 percent of the population has sleep issues mine included and it is no fun and there is help available and it can be sorted and you can sleep like a normal person so i hope you enjoyed this interview all the information on joseph his incredible book the audiobook and of course one-on-one consultations are all available in the description bar and it's worth noting that again i'm not affiliated with joseph in any way shape or form i found him by his book and then decided to book him for therapy and bring him here on this channel to hopefully help all of you who are suffering with your sleep so enjoy the interview hi i'm joe i helped wayne sleep for about two weeks ago yeah so that's why i help people who have insomnia uh but not with the normal sleep hygiene nonsense that everyone tends to know and that's the only thing that people tend to hear because there's so much misinformation around sleep so i had my own chronic insomnia for 20 years and during that time so it started for me when i was 14 started how i see it developed with most people so i had a couple of poor nights of sleep i became very anxious very stressed about those poor nights of sleep and i started thinking well what can i do to try and fix it i started sleeping late started trying to go to bed early completely changed my habits and behaviors around sleep within about um a week or so became more stressed more anxious more worried around sleep and then it just spiraled out of control from there so very quickly i developed incredibly ritualistic obsessive behaviors around there and started eating kiwi fruits before bed warm baths supplements and by the end of the 20 years it had completely taken over and stripped my entire life because i had literally a thousand things to try and make myself sleep a thousand things to try and force myself to sleep spending 14 hours in bed each night moved to america to live in a tv because once i'd stayed in a tent in the uk and slept really well in it and then i thought i had to move to america to live in a teepee for rest of my life to sleep of course it didn't work but that's kind of how obsessive um the focus around sleep and some you can get and eventually it left me out of business um depressed and living in the vans some a very nice story but um i'm through it now um got help from an amazing physiologist using evidence-based techniques which what i now teach people um now worked with sleep charity mana helpline and published a book on insomnia which is where you've found me from and yeah help probably thousands of people sleep now so do you do you find that a lot of people with sleep issues have ritualistic tendencies or things that they do every night in order to try to sleep they don't work but they still keep going incredibly i'd say everyone because i'm not even going to know every single person so they start just it always develops the same way so the trigger it really doesn't matter so people think oh i've got um insomnia because i've got anxiety or depression ptsd i'm going through the menopause or going for a stressful time or they think they drink too much caffeine or they exercise before bed but insomnia it's worry it's stress driven it's the brain learning a new pattern of sleep which i'm going to hopefully talk about a little bit um later on but the obsessive ritualist behaviors everyone starts to do it because they become so focused around sleep hyper aware around them because there's so little information out there they think well i've got to eat kiwi fruit before bed because i've heard that it contains serotonin which one converts to melatonin so i've got to have fat before bed i've got to have one bath before bed because i saw that on a michael mosley documentary so i need to have one bath before bed and i can't drink caffeine after three pm and i can't exercise before bed and i can't eat late in a restaurant i can't stay in a hotel and it just starts stripping and taking away people's entire life and then it just causes so much focus on it so eighty percent of what i do is getting people to let go of these ritualistic behaviors because they are not helpful in any way shape or form but people i think they become so worried that if they stop doing them it's going to make it worse if they say to themselves i ate a kiwi fruit last night and i slept well last night so now i need to eat a kiwi fruit every single night before bed and then that will stop working and then i think oh okay we did work before so now i need to have one box before bed to add to the kiwi fruits and yeah it's just so common and this is what drives and perpetuates so yeah so what causes insomnia so i sort of touched on it earlier with these obsessive ritualistic behaviors people do but that's more that sort of adds to so the trigger as i said earlier it doesn't matter because every anything there's so many variables that can affect your sleep that you know none of these things could be controlled but it's the behaviors people do afterwards which matter which teaches the brain a new pattern of sleep it uh fragments the sleep drive and sleep drives absolutely fundamental when you understand the sleep drive light bulbs completely start going off and you really understand it and why people don't understand it's just beyond me because it's never taught but yeah yeah it's it's it's so fundamental to sleep and yet nobody understands it and um yeah and if you uh so a good an example perhaps say you've missed you've had a really bad night for three nights in a row yeah yeah you haven't got insomnia yeah but then you go oh i've had three really bad nights what if i have four yeah what if i have and then you start to enter the rabbit hole yeah because your mind is messing with you because you're focusing on a problem that doesn't exist yet and if you can normalize poor quality sleep now and again that would be so incredibly helpful to people because if you're going for a stressful time going for a bereavement that is going to affect the quality of your sleep but it is the rabbit hole like you say where people start changing their behaviors around it because they just don't understand it properly so let's start doing things like waking up late in the day let's start going to bed when they're not sleepy all the time people just gradually gradually start extending the amount of time they spend in bed and then they sleep even worse and that's when it spirals out of control and they start doing all these ritualistic obsessive behaviors around it but really i'd say insomnia is caused by four main things so it's the brain taking on a new pattern of sleep it's a sleep drive problem it's the fight or flight response and it's the conditioned response of the bed being a place of worry and wakefulness which is what you certainly experience and that is so common with people with insomnia but so do you want me to break them down one by one all of them okay um so i like to use analogies when i describe things so in terms of the brain taking on a new pattern of sleep so people that go on around the world boat trips for example with solo around the world boat trips they can't sleep for more than 15 minutes at the time because if they did the boat's going to sink they're going to go off course it's going to be pretty bad news for them so they would set an alarm every 15 minutes in order to wake themselves up during the night time which is great when you're on the boat and but what they find is after about a week of doing that the brain very quickly learns that's the pattern of sleep they want and the brain will then start waking them up every single 15 minutes without even having to set the alarm i've actually seen a client who was around the world did the round of a boat trip and the brain had learnt that pattern of sleep when they got home they were constantly waking up every 15 minutes because that is how adaptable the brain is so with people with insomnia it doesn't matter what pattern you've taught the brain it's going to take it on so it might be for taking ages to fall asleep it might be waking up early in the morning incredibly common with people insomnia to say three o'clock every single morning i will wake up on the dot three o'clock and that's because they taught that as a pattern of sleep so every time they wake up they look at the clock they reinforce wakefulness they become anxious become stressed but they're awake they become annoyed that they're awake and then the brain then learns okay well three o'clock in the morning there's this really threatening stressful worrying thing that happens to you i better make sure i wake you up at three o'clock in the morning to respond to this threat which will i'll talk about more later about the fight or flight response but yeah the brain taking on new paths and sleep is key to insomnia and how it develops and you can teach the brain whatever pattern you want and people do it they don't do it deliberately but the behaviors people do is what causes it and as you probably know because this is yeah how you're sort of developed yeah and i know i'm off camera but we'll we'll i'll jump on camera and we'll speak about mine okay later is do men and women get it equally or is are women or men more predisposed does menopause for women play insomnia doesn't discriminate so anybody can get insomnia um so children get it anything anybody can get insomnia but it is more common in in women and in older women and i'd say it's probably people with type a personalities have a much higher prevalence insomnia because they're unwilling to accept poor quality sleep even a tiny bit of poor quality sleep so they start making loads of effort to sleep and it's virus from there and because they want to fix things and it's often that trying to fix things and not knowing how to fix things which is what can kind of cause it to aspire as well certainly people going for the menopause they will experience short-term sleep problems as they're waking up with hot flushes but short-term sleep problems and poor quality sleep isn't the same as insomnia it's how you respond to the hot flushes if you responded really anxious really stressed really worried and it takes you ages to then fall back to sleep again that's not the um the menopause causing that it is the the response to it and that's when it develops into insomnia so yeah loads of things can cause um short-term sleep problems for sure quality but it's insomnia and poor quality sleep is very different and but yeah it's more prevalent in women um yeah certainly i just ask when when people whenever you google anything to do with insomnia sleep hygiene will be the first thing you see yeah yeah and it's everywhere yeah right you'd have your bedroom set at a certain yeah yeah and go to bed at the exact same time a whole host of of things that you need to do is it all just nonsense so it's not nonsense but it is not designed to fix a long-term chronic insomnia problem and when you try and use it to fix a long-term chronic insomnia problem it backfires because it just erodes your confidence that you can ever sleep again so people with insomnia that have already tried having a caller bedroom but i've already tried stopping drinking caffeine after 3 pm and i think well every time i do this it just never seems to work so there must be something incredibly wrong with me they go to the doctor and the doctor will say oh have you tried not drinking caffeine after 3pm you've tried it a thousand times and it just erodes your confidence but insomnia can be overcome but that's because insomnia is incredibly misunderstood because doctors on average receive one and a half hours of sleep medicine training throughout their entire career and that includes things like sleep apnea parasomnias which are unusual sleep disorders and yeah it's such a misunderstood thing but what you did say about setting yourself fixed bedtime is complete nonsense because you cannot sleep unless you are sleepy and if you set yourself a fixed bedtime you just go to bed when you're not tired which actually will bring me on to one of the second major driving factors of insomnia is the sleep drive so the brain takes on a new pattern of sleep that's number one cause insomnia another is a poor quality fragmented sleep drive so the only thing that makes you sleep is your sleep drive and the only thing that builds uh your sleep drive is wakefulness so in the same way the longer it is since we last drunk the sleepier um but the longer you've been awake for the sleepier you will feel much stronger that drive to be at night time not people insomnia never feel sleepy there's a couple of reasons behind that but the real simple way to explain the sleep drive is say you've got a good sleeper that wakes up at seven o'clock in the morning and they need 17 hours of wakefulness to produce seven hours of sleep they're gonna start feeling sleepy uh 17 hours after their wake time which is seven o'clock at midnight but if that same person wakes up at 10 o'clock instead they still need that 17 hours of wait for us to produce fast seven hours of sleep so it means they're not going to feel sleepy the next night until 3 a.m so when you understand the sleep drive you sort of understand why setting yourself a fixed bedtime is complete nonsense because if you're not feeling sleepy there's no evidence to say but just by lying down in a dark room you're going to magically fall asleep it it is i wish they would stop it and it goes on something that i quickly want to ask you whenever you google anything on sleep you will see eight hours of sleep yeah that is the recommended and to me that sounds like everybody should have a size 10 shoe but for some reason and i even as a child i have never slept eight hours yeah and because i never needed it yeah yeah i think if i needed it i probably would have slept eight hours yeah yeah but i is it damaging to hear stuff like that when say you feel great on sex is it damaging to know that well actually you should be getting eight yes and if you don't well what's going to happen to you it's very damaging and i don't know where this come from because yeah there are averages so there's an am and i don't even like to say what the average because average doesn't mean anything because like you know like you said the shoe size which you nicked from my book was um yeah eight and a half for men is the average shoe size and if if everyone tried to squeeze themselves into an eight and a half some people are going to have you know massive clown feet and some people are going to be hobbling because their feet aren't going to fit in the shoes so it is complete nonsense so some people can need nine hours of sleep six works for you six and a half works for me and it's really damaging because people think well i need eight hours of sleep so because i think i should set myself a fixed bedtime complete nonsense i'm gonna give myself eight hours in bed to try and get that eight hours of sleep but if you only need six hours of sleep what are you going to do for two hours in bed you're gonna spend two hours in bed awake so that might be at the start of the night that might be in the middle of the night that might be waking up early but at some point in the night you're going to be awake for two hours because you cannot get more sleep than the body needs so it's a really damaging thing to think that everyone needs eight hours of sleep so yeah which that weight fullness during the night time brings me on to my third point which is the fight or flight response as well but yeah i'm glad you mentioned that because i hate that when you say fight and i know i know this for myself but what do you mean when you say fight or flight so as i say so and i'm going to use another analogy for this so we've got a good sleeper i'm going to say catherine so catherine is in america and she's going on a camping trip to the national park and then she pitches her tent because she's got a strong drive to sleep strong regulated sleep drive she normally starts feeling sleepy around about 11 o'clock so she's just about to drift off to sleep and then she hears the howl of a wolf next to her tent so a heart rate body temperature adrenaline court so they basically spike through the roof because there's something incredibly threatening to her safety and the brain wants to make her alert to keep her safe so she can either fight the wolf which isn't a good idea or run away from the wolf which either way you're gonna get gnashed but that's the fight or flight response so when people have insomnia and they've got such fear around sleep such fear around not sleeping such fear around being in bed in the bedroom which i'm going to get onto a little bit later why that occurs they get the same physiological response as if they were to have a wolf in their bedroom so people insomnia they always say i feel really hot at night time i feel and hot um or i've seen it feels like i've got a really racing heartbeat and i've just got a race in mind and this is all the fight or flight response so this is that feeling there's basically a wolf in the bedroom and the brain's saying there's something incredibly threatening to your safety do not sleep i want you to be alert i want to keep you safe so a lot of my work is around reducing that anxiety reducing that stress reducing that worry around sleep and there's a load of different techniques i use for that but as a with you a lot of them a lot of stuff that i would usually teach i didn't actually use any of that because everyone responds differently to it so i need to constantly change and adapt how i do things but yeah with so yeah i did i did change quite a few things yeah because i i think with me because i'm quite type one yeah with the way that i think yeah yeah like a good example would be writing things down for me wasn't the best idea not focusing on something for me worked much better um in terms of just trying to distract my mind from something that was already preoccupied um with you know sleep um now i know better yeah but at the time i didn't and you know all i wanted to do and read and look at and think about was not sleeping yeah and the more i read it and studied it the worse it got yeah because i was just horrified yeah everything i did was i'm gonna i'm gonna spend the next four hours looking at youtube videos and horrify myself even more and you know and that was a ridiculous thing to do but i would imagine incredibly common for somebody who's not sleeping yeah i'm going to google it because google never lies yeah it was um yeah you i i enjoyed actually uh work it was good it was different [Laughter] so if you could give three bits of advice three tips that people can take action with today yeah in order to improve their quality of sleep yeah what would they be so the most the most important thing is to get up at the same time every single day so that covers um the the sleep drive which i was talking about earlier just anchoring that body clock anchoring that wake time so that you the brain knows when to feel sleepy the next night that's not going to fix someone who's got a lot of worry and stress around their sleep but just for a huge amount of people and you don't need to do it ritualistically you don't need to do it obsessively because good sleepers are normal sleepers they don't always get up at the same time every single day but just knowing having an awareness of why it's so important it's the first step to setting anchoring that wait time incredibly important i think it is the most for me it was it is the one of the most beneficial things i can do is i'm i know what time i'm going to get up and i don't care that i don't have a lion because i feel good yeah yeah um and it for me it takes stress away because i i just love it it is the most simplistic ridiculous thing ever why don't you get up tomorrow eight o'clock and stick to that time or six a.m or whatever it is it doesn't matter whatever time people go oh well you know i'm not to become become you know just as long as it's as long as it's regular and it works for you it's it's it's fine it works really well and it is the most important piece of advice i can give and it's ridiculously simplistic but you would never think of it because if you are not sleeping well you don't want to get after the alarm goes because you've probably just gone to sleep yeah yeah you want to stay in bed for another four or five years so that's the trick it's about when i'm working with people shifting that focus away from trying to get as much sleep as they possibly can in the short term to creating new behaviors and habits in order to sleep well over a long time and i'm also tackling the anxiety stress and worry around sleep as well but that's that is the trick of doing that not going yeah so going to bed when you can't keep your eyes open sleep you're not setting yourself a fixed bedtime incredibly helpful people with insomnia never feel sleepy but that's the fight or flight response and which i haven't talked about the conditioned response of the bed being a place of worry and wakefulness which causes that but when people work with me very quickly they get that sleepy feeling back yeah and with the sleep so just to be clear yeah go to bed when you are sleepy is different from going to bed when you're tired so sleepy is when you know your eyes are going to close yeah so tiredness and sleepiness is not the same thing so you can be tired from being on the internet all day or time so i suppose fatigue and sleepiness are not the same so you can have that sort of wired feeling like you've had loads of coffee that's fatigue sleepiness is when you know you can't keep your eyes open and you you're drifting off you feel calm you feel peaceful that's sleepiness and people inside may just never get that sleepy thin because there's so much background anxiety i mean they do guess because they every time they do sleep that's because they're sleepy so people insomnia they never you know you won't meet someone that say i literally haven't slept for 10 years occasionally you meet that person and that's a that's not insomnia that's called um that one set that's not insomnia that is packed paradoxical insomnia which is a different sleep disorder but that's incredibly wrong i won't go into that but yeah people insomnia every time they slept it's because they've had that drive to sleep but because their sleep drives so unregulates because the pattern of sleep is unregulated it's just never consistent and it's never regular but i always i find with myself that my sleep drive would be strongest during the day because night time i would just suddenly spring to life because of the fight or flight in the day i wasn't concerned i was tired in there i could go to sleep because i wasn't stressed the way i i would be at night and the night would come by and i'd be like ta-da suddenly i've just been powered up with electricity and you're ready to go for another four hours yeah so it is the fight or flight at play and it's also the intention as well so in the daytime you're trying to stay awake so you want to be awake so so wakefulness isn't something that's undesirable when you're in bed at night suddenly waitfulness is incredibly undesirable because you want the sleep and that shift in intent as well as the fight or flight is what is driving that as well but i i don't know if i stole this from you so i probably did but it's it's great for me so a good example would be when i'm watching telly and it's relatively late at night i am trying to stay awake because i i'm not trying to go to sleep right so i'm actually just i'm trying to stay awake to watch this film yeah and i'm finding it difficult i never thought of it before in ever yeah when i'm sat down watching telly it's because i'm trying to stay awake is this i know it sounds mental yeah it's and that and it is the effort around sleep is so much and everything is around effort all these all these things you're doing to avoid um all these avoidance sleep efforts which i call them so not drinking alcohol not not drinking caffeine not doing this not doing that those are sleep efforts all the things you're doing before bed to make yourself sleep the yogurt and meditation which are fine you know there's nothing wrong with doing these things but when you're doing them with the intention of making yourself sleep that's when they become problematic so it's it's just yeah it is effort and it's a funny thing because five-year-olds they know how to sleep everyone's born with that ability to sleep it's the things that people learn afterwards which is what caused insomnia and perpetuate insomnia over the long run and yeah but the less effort well once you've fixed your sleep pattern and out of the anxiety stress and worried about it and got your good uh sneak pants in place then once the less effort you make to sleep the better you will sleep at night yeah um so where are we up to so we've done two so far haven't we um yeah set the time to get up yeah and go to bed on sleepy very good and it's kind of ties in with the first two which is to spend less time in bed and if we go back to the eight hour sleep meth the the best way to teach the brand new pattern of sleep is to spend less time in bed it doesn't mean you sleep less it just means the quality of your sleep massively improves and that's where you want to shift your focus to getting good sleep quality rather than sleep quantity the quantity will come once you've fixed your sleep quality but to get better sleep quality the less time you spend in bed the better you will sleep which is incredibly counter-intuitive and no one can get their head around it because there aren't many things that that apply to so if you think language learning learning instrument normally the more time you spend there the more you tried it the better you get there so to shift that focus away from less effort you make the less time you spend it the better your sleep is incredibly hard for people to do but once they understand sleep and understand how sleep works that they then do go down they can then take that on board but yeah spending less time in bed incredibly helpful so insomnia can it be cured i mean yes because i had it for 20 years and you know i try not to speak too much about you know how bad mine was and everything but from what it kind of yeah it i had it pretty bad it's not a competition but i had it for 20 years and there were nights and weeks where i just completely lost hope but that's because i've been doing all the wrong stuff because i've just been on the internet researching sleep hygiene and learning about kiwi fruit and warm baths and all the other nonsense but michael mosley who has no business to talk about sleep is telling you to do and so i've helped clients that have had it for decades and within you know a few months people are better yeah i'm not i'm not talking slightly better it's something that you can go on to sleep like a normal sleep but once you've built that pattern of sleep once you've dealt with the anxiety stress and worry around it then you go and sleep like a normal sleeper and a normal sleep is really someone that just pays no attention to their sleep whatsoever which is lovely when you get to that stage when you're just not focusing on it when you're not thinking about it and you just go to bed and then the bed instead of being this horrible place you don't want to be in is a place you look forward to going to a place that's incredibly relaxing just yeah have it just have what everyone else has got you know let's sleep well and yeah i've helped yeah thousands of people with the books with the one-to-ones with the youtube channel yeah people had it for decades yeah so how can people find you give us your best um so the book you know fantastic book um amazing um whether or not it will be enough to get you all the way to the end you found that you had to to go see me one-to-one because i everyone's different and it's just lovely to be able to chat to someone and get all your questions answered and then have that advice tailored to you because i can't cover everything in a book because i'm everyone's different and yeah with you there are things in the book i thought that's not going to work for you yeah and so i didn't i didn't have you doing that um but yeah the book is a fantastic first step um my youtube channel which is called insomnia talks you're going to put the links in the description for everyone yeah yeah and get help that's a fledgling youtube channel at the moment but it's a very helpful one because yes prior to contacting you i had already subscribed and was watching videos yeah okay so it's an incredibly good chat with huge amounts of information that don't leave you terrified when you're trying to go to sleep oh so much on there and people i just need to so many videos are being created that people who don't understand that they've obviously never had insomnia and and you listen to them and it makes it worse because it makes you obsess and worry around sleep and it does frustrate me that they've got a million views i think it's horrifying because if you have never ever had a problem going to sleep yep then any information you're giving somebody yeah no matter how good it may be to a normal sleeper with somebody with a sleeping problem it can make things ten times worse yeah and make you worry oh i'm gonna have a health issue yeah i'm i'm gonna die early yeah and and that all that horrifying thing none of that none of that's true um so all of this stuff so you can't run studies where you have um to prove that insomnia causes any long-term health concern you need to have 40 people a thousand people give 500 of them insomnia for the rest of her life which is incredible yeah just give them insomnia so they've all got to start as normal sleep give 500 of them insomnia um give 500 of them perfect sleep for the rest of the life and then follow these two groups of 40 years to see whether or not one group has a higher prevalence of a certain health concern and that's all the data is that's out there and correlation is not causation and all of this stuff is just so damaging to sleep anything that creates that fear anything that creates more effort i just wish people would stay off it if they don't understand it but yeah okay so just to reiterate before um subscribe to the youtube channel because it's very helpful yeah the book there's also the audiobook version which is what i purchased yeah yeah yeah and of course there's the one-on-ones once yeah i mean that's gonna be if you've had it a long time and it's something that has you know really chipped away at your life deal with it and all the information um on joseph will be in the description box so you can check out the channel the books and of course one-on-ones more than once yeah thanks all right so i i didn't have any sleep issues yeah pretty much until 24 25 when a doctor put me on amitriptyline and that was basically a misdiagnosis for a bladder complaint that was getting me up in the night yeah but once i'd taken that glorious tablet within half an hour i wanted to go to sleep and of course the next day i felt like absolute death from the hangover of this this pill right yeah yeah and over the course of years on it um 15 actually probably 17 years on it with my age now um the dose increased to sort of 50 milligrams which is still a low dose i think i've seen people on 200 so i guess i was still on a low dose but it was high for my threshold yeah yeah and that's when the sleep issues came and with it came something called hypnic jokes which i'd never ever heard of in my life until i had one and i didn't know at the time what it was either and for me i would feel them in my legs and my chest so i would be jolted awake like a lightning bolt would hit me yeah and i would be grabbing my chest thinking oh my god what's happening i'm dying um and that's when i started to have trouble with sleep because once i'd had one well then i needed to have two and if i had two well i think 20 in a row would be a fun thing to have before i go to sleep and because i was freaked out about them that made them worse and the worse they got the more i thought about them the more i researched them and you end up i ended up going into you know just a spiral of being horrified and terrified of going to sleep because i was scared i was going to get these these hypnic jerks and i was still on i'm a trip to lynn because it's just a joy to be on and what would happen is i i never slept in the day for whatever reason my mind i guess always knew it wasn't good for me to go to sleep in the day but whenever i tried i would get this electricity noise in my mind and i paid no attention to it other than it being a warning please don't sleep in the day your body doesn't like it and i never paid any attention to it until i decided to google it and it was at that point that my whole body just shut down even though it wasn't harmful to me it was annoying because sometimes i'd like to go to sleep in a day but when i so the the name of it is called exploding head syndrome and i wish they wouldn't call it that it's a horrible name yeah it's a terrifying name and i knew deep down inside it was a form of a hypno yeah just in the brain and it was the transition between trying to go to sleep yeah and as you are i guess entering sleep right but then i googled it and there was this name and i could no longer get the name out of my head so i decided that what i would do is i would stop the amitriptyline just like that and that would be the end of my trouble and that's when i stopped sleeping so i remember getting three hours the first night because i was i had a clock right next to me so i made sure that watching which yeah you get rid of that yeah and it made it made the night go so much quicker yeah just looking at the cockpit yeah second night i had two hours and then i didn't sleep at all and it was at that point that i that i started to go downhill really quickly in terms of how i was thinking i'm never gonna get better i'm gonna have this for the rest of my life there's all these problems with my sleep these hypnic jerks and this these noises in my head when i'm trying to go to sleep and it just became a nightmare because i was not only was i not sleeping but i was afraid to try to sleep because i didn't want to experience these noises in my in my head and then i'd go on google and that just made it worse because google inherently you type in the word headache and cancer comes up on the screen is the first thing so it was just a spiral of misery of trying to sort something that was relatively easy to sort but you were i was so hyper-aroused by everything i was reading and thinking and so aware of the time and how long i was going to sleep for and it just wasn't enough didn't matter if i felt okay it wasn't enough um and then i found you and i found your books i was googling insomnia cures insomnia please help i need help anything to do with insomnia and i saw your book and i saw the reviews on it and they're all verified reviews so the first thing i did was order it because i wanted to listen to it in the car so i was on audiobook and what i found helpful for with me and the way that my brain works is i like a story but i really need a bullet point i need something to follow that will give a breakdown of let's start here and we'll work in each chapter we add bits and pieces in right that worked really well for me because it gave me something that was actionable to do and then i contacted you i would imagine a few weeks after the book and to start one-on-one consultations because mine just wasn't the sleep issue in terms of not getting to sleep which was a really big issue but mine was also the fact that i was getting this exploding head syndrome and the anxiety around that bloody noise that likes to tingle yeah whenever you're tired at night do you do you speak to a lot of people that have these kind of issues with hypnic jerks or exploding heads in drugs yeah yeah but they are actually quite common yes so so good sleepers they're going to be having hypnic jerks if they were to to have them in a speed lap they'll be having all these things it's just that because they've not got this attention and this type of focus on sleep they just don't remember it it's just a normal thing that's happening but they're not so focused on it it's not something threatening to them it's not something worrying to them so it's a non-event and it's something that they don't even even register or even remember that they've done it but they were to look at the data from the lab this is a normal thing to have but it is that this i'm not gonna say it's create [Music] yeah what you focus on you certainly attract and just that focus and all that attention you were putting on her was just driving her and and to me before i googled it this was not a threatening issue i only ever experienced them in the afternoon if i tried to see never ever at night right so this wasn't a threat to me until i googled it or until the thought entered my mind i wonder if i could have these at night and it was all i needed to do was put a little tiny seed in there for it to just explode into something that it wasn't ever throughout those all those years of having them sporadically just by being ridiculous with my own mind and thinking you know silly thoughts i wonder why i could i wonder what could happen if i thought about this a lot and then suddenly yeah you think about it a lot yeah yeah getting you to do nothing was was quite a hard thing okay i need to detach from it and and let go of it and then it then they go away yeah and but you don't i think you don't want to let you want to let go but there's a part of you that likes to be in control of and as you said for me it was do nothing as best you can that's what works best for me um the the number one thing that helped me with sleep was set your alarm and i love i love doing that even though i'm up at a certain time every day it's great for me and the other thing was not knowing what time it was that i went to bed yeah you may have guessed i may be able to kind of guess but it was i didn't have my phone next to me so i would be on my phone all night long all night long and now i don't have the phone from 10 o'clock at night so and there is no clock on the telly so whatever i'm watching i'm no longer aware necessarily what time i'm going to sleep but i know i'm getting enough sleep and the sleep i'm getting now is way different to what it was on the tablet because then i was being put to sleep and now i'm going to sleep because i'm tired yeah and i'd never experienced that in in all the years i've been on amateur and i've never sat here you know with my eyes nodding off in my head nodding off i said that's a good thing people are afraid of that oh i can't be sleepy but you won't sleep here sleepiness is a is a great thing and people are kind of afraid of it but that's that's a really good sign that you're having that and you were going oh i sometimes fall asleep on the sofa isn't that a dreadful thing i fell asleep on the sofa but you know it's it's and also whether you're i'm falling asleep here which is often yeah yeah or i'm just going straight to bed i'm i am going to sleep without you know being [Music] aware of it yeah i know i'm tired now and and i'm also not waking up in in the in the morning feeling like i've been drugged because i'm no longer on a drug that's making me feel absolutely horrific and i can't remember the last time that i felt well now i feel completely normal when i wake up in the morning i do not feel bone tired all day long i might feel for the first half an hour like where am i but that's a normal part of going from being asleep to sort of waking up yeah i'm sluggish in the morning yeah again it's a weird thing and you know 17 years on a tablet yeah to no longer it's the weirdest feeling to have a normal amount of sleep for me yeah and i again i mentioned earlier on i don't get eight hours i've never had eight hours of my life i'm much better well there's no hour really because i do still track things so i can see how much i'm getting and how little but all of it seems about right yeah you know i can get five hours some nights i feel absolutely amazing and other nights i can get seven and a half yeah but i feel really good on all of those hours of sleep the body would get once you've not got that anxiety stress and warm the body would get the sleep it it needs so as long as you sort of stay out of its way it's going to do its thing so yeah this when people obsessing about you know sleep sleep duration [Music] it you know if you're waking up and you're feeling refreshed and you're feeling good that's all that matters so it really doesn't matter and some nights you're not going to get yeah if you can normalize occasionally not sleeping as well as you would like and just carry on the next day and just have a fantastic day you just get better quality sleep the next night yeah but as long as you listen to the body and go to bed when you feel sleepy and allow that to happen you don't try and control anything oh it's not dreadful that i slept really you know not as well as i would have liked last night and just carry on i know that's normal i understand sleep incredibly well and i still get pulled out to sleep and don't have perfect sleep all the time because everybody does everyone does and that that's again why i love and i i get up at the same time and even in the beginning where i was just wired the whole time and just ease i like completely wired at night right so i'm i'm like this in the days i'm so tired yeah but then at night i've just done nothing but shots of coffee all night long so i'm completely wired but no matter how little sleep i got i woke up at the same time and after two nights of that that's when i like the magic starts happening because now i've got a true sleep draw i mean i really i'm starting to feel what it's like to feel truly tired at night because i'm doing these really small little things in the day this i'm going to get up same time and it's having this effect where i'm building upon this sleep drive yeah so people think insomnia is tackled at nighttime it's not tackled at night it's tackled the second you wake up in the morning so the better quality day you can have the better quality sleep you can have at night so if you can shift that focus away from trying to sleep at night time and doing these really reactionary things you know half an hour before bedtime and just focus on having a great quality day you'll get that great quality sleep at night yeah i did all the really ritualistic things you know different to other people perhaps but i was still at doing them i was still reading about them and i was still looking for well what about this herb i reckon this will work and never realizing that you can't be put to sleep yeah you have to go to sleep because your body needs to go to sleep naturally and not be pushed into a coma yeah yeah and that is not restorative sleep and all these herbs and things they just sort of go okay well i've got something wrong with my brain i need this herb which increases dopamine that means i must have a dopamine problem or this one increases so i must have a serotonin problem chipping away chipping away at your innate ability to sleep i had a wicked basket i in my videos on youtube i used to have them in the background it was probably 50 supplements i've probably spent 3 000 pounds on supplements probably more over 20 years i could have bought a house in my supplements i bought it was it was a cocktail every night it's desperation too yeah and yeah and also it's looking outside isn't it for something to fix you because you're broken yeah something has to fix you when really there is nothing broken it's just your mind being absolute nonsense um because your mind's just going haywire yeah because you're reading and doing all these things that are creating this shitty sort of atmosphere of staying awake yeah it's weird isn't it see everything you say i just hear so it's just so when everyone probably watching this now is going to go i do that i do that and they and they think that their insomnia is incredibly unique and then they'll just be hearing this and go oh joe was doing those things you're doing those things everyone's doing the same patterns and this you know they might vary but the intention behind them and the effort behind them and the but just always for safe crazy yeah and there's just no one and i think just to so i don't want to say that i overcame this within 10 days yeah or anything like that but i started to sleep normally very quickly after we started working together and that was because the program for me was tailored towards me and my personality yeah and what would work best for my brain yeah i went off book with you so i had my book and i went i'm not gonna i'm not gonna do it for you i went completely out i just thought ah but you remember it yeah it worked for me because that's what i needed to do in order to calm my brain because all i needed to do was calm the brain yeah and then everything would sort of yeah your your behaviors were pretty you know they weren't too bad you know you know there are there are a few things i thought ah you know just real simple but it's weird you know you probably knew that it wasn't helpful to you but you just need someone to point that out and just say make you aware of it and then you went oh yeah that's that's probably not helpful and then and i think just being given permission to not do that and to let go of it was just incredibly helpful because before if you if you don't know that it's it's it's because if you've been taught that this is going to help you and actually it's not i'm going to just get someone actually saying no because i've been shown that right path yes it's good yeah happy days thank you so much thank you i enjoyed it yeah you

Channel: Wayne Goss

Views: 50,311

Keywords: YouTube, Beauty, Makeup, Tutorial, wayne goss, insomnia, insomnia cure, how to cure insomnia

Id: nepvzXhoDTk

Length: 54min 41sec (3281 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 06 2022