How I Manage Post-Trail Depression

hey y'all Dixie here today I want to talk to you about post rail depression [Music] so this topic is a little more serious or maybe a little more deep than the topics that I usually cover but it is a very real thing that I think needs addressing because usually people talk about through hacks or even you know extended section hacks as something that's almost like a fairy tale I mean of course you have bad days and you get rained on and blisters and injuries and things like that you know everyone knows that there are ups and downs but I feel like something that's not address is often as it should be is kind of react limiting to everyday life so today I want to kind of cover maybe what post trail depression is and how it tends to affect people and then maybe some tips to help with that if you find yourself experiencing post trail depression after a through hack or again an extended hack of any kind but before I delve too much into this I just want to throw the disclaimer out there you know I'm not a professional on this topic I'm just sharing what I experienced and what other people around me experienced before I started my first through hike so my hack on the Appalachian Trail I had kind of heard a post trail depression I read about it a little bit online maybe in some blogs and things like that but you know I kind of thought well it doesn't really make sense you know why would somebody experience depression after accomplishing such a huge goal and you know being able to chase a dream and I wonder if myself you know is it even real like it is it actually a thing or you know I I don't know I just didn't think that I would necessarily have anything like that after completing such a major accomplishment but I was definitely wrong in post trail depression was something that I experienced after really each of my through hikes but I've gotten better and better at channeling that and and dealing with it and turning that energy into something else I've heard that sentiment from others who have said you know I didn't really know what to expect I'd heard about it but I wasn't really that worried about it and then it hit me a lot harder than I ever thought that it would the best way that I can try to relate it to maybe somebody who's never experienced anything like that is say you do go on a vacation to the beach and it's wonderful and you spend a week or more out on this wonderful trip and then there's something about when you get back home after being on cloud nine that is just like oh man you know and say a Monday after a vacation feels a lot more rough than a general Monday I mean all mondays aren't great right but like after you've had all of that time off work it's kind of hard to get back in that swing of things so I would say that post trail depression is very similar to that but you know a lot more intense let's talk a little bit now about how or why this ends up happening to folks so you take a person who lives in the normal world and is used to the rat-race of life and everything but maybe they feel like something is lacking or they've had this dream of through hacking for a really long time and you know they just feel like they're not meant to live the life that they're currently living and they want to get out there and do something big like a through hack so then they get out on the trail and there's a lot of excitement to start with because it's it's completely new and every day you're waking up somewhere different every day you're seeing different things even though yes the routine of a thru-hike is pretty much the same but you get to design your life exactly how you want to the whole time you're out there you're suddenly getting plenty of exercise one before you were probably sitting in a cubicle in front of a computer a lot of your day and now you're seeing all these beautiful sights you're meeting new people who are very passionate about their journey also and you're working towards a steady goal every day and you're constantly seeing some kind of progress as you chip away at the miles and then in addition to all of that you're meeting kind people who are helping you all along the way whether it's hitchhiking or trail angels who are out there doing trail magic that are just out of the kindness of their heart saying here have this or here let me help you because they believe in you and towards the end of a thru-hike it's interesting because you know I was ready to be done I was exhausted I was just worn out I was beat up physically you know emotionally I just wanted to see that sign on Katahdin and reach it and touch it and be done with my goal and then suddenly I'm there and I touch the Sun and I've completed one of the greatest accomplishments of my life and in that moment honestly it kind of felt in one way so amazing and and the other almost kind of Numb because I didn't have exactly all of the answers that I had hoped I would have when I touched that Sun you know I was closer I did know a lot more about myself and I did realize that for myself I didn't want to live life you know at the whims of someone else you know I didn't want someone else designing my life and telling me how to live it and so it's almost like you've been awakened to this real you inside of you but now it's like where do I go from here so then a lot of people find they get home and they're actually pretty excited to go back home and see their family and friends but what I realized and and what a lot of my fellow through hackers have realized is that when you get there you suddenly feel like less connected with the people that you love and my friend perk who through hikes also the ATP CT and CDT told me that this feeling to him was the closest thing to the feeling he had when he came home from being overseas perk was in the Navy and he said you know it's not exactly the same thing of course because you know you're not out there risking your life like protecting your country you know but you are out there in a situation where there are minimal stresses every day you know we're gonna have enough food am I gonna have enough water and you're going through this experience with all these other people but the only folks that can truly relate to the experience are the ones who went through it with you and one of my other friends who I knew on the 80 said that he really thinks that this is a reflection of potentially what is wrong with society you know we've put ourselves in this synthetic world if you will then you know that's what I call it everyone on trail likes to call it the real world or you know back to normal laughs when referring to everyday life off trail but I really feel like on trail and the way you live there is more like real life and and where we came from as humans so we've built up this synthetic world around ourselves based around you know comfort and convenience and a lot of those things are wonderful I mean don't get me wrong I really love being able to flush my toilet instead of dig a cow hole sometimes but I just think that he's pretty spot-on with that you know it's it's not normal for humans to sit in these boxes and sit in front of these screens all the time and not experience nature and feel challenged in and just you know passionate about something so I won't say that every through hacker is definitely gonna experience this when they get home but of the through hackers that I've talked to about this I would say the majority of the folks that I know that either attempted or completed a through hack and then came home easily the majority experienced some form of post trail depression so some of the ways that myself and other people recognize this in themselves is that they got home they felt like isolating themselves they didn't really want to get a job they had a lack of motivation they found that everything just seemed so difficult and exhausting and so complicated back in normal life some people notice an extreme longing for that trail life again some folks experience substance abuse or just an extreme sense of feeling down or potentially even suicidal thoughts but now I want to cover some of the ways to maybe mitigate or even prevent post trail depression so the first thing I suggest is just recognize that it is a possibility you know something that you could experience and look for those sons once you're done with your hack another through hacker that I talked to even mentioned that she didn't really feel it until a year or more later so just be aware that it could happen next stay connected with your Trammell II so your trail family the fringing meat out on trail I would recommend finding them on Facebook or other social media swapping phone numbers with them whatever you have to do emails that way when you're kind of feeling down and out and they probably are too y'all can talk to one another I don't know how many times I've called Rigga and Perk and we reminisce about the trail and remember when this happened or remember when that happened or I'm thinking about you or hey are you doing okay you know those things are really important and those are the people who are your crew and they're going to be able relate to you more than anybody else and they don't get sick of hearing your stories because they lived it too and and it's exciting to them also next simplify life so I think that a lot of folks experience this when they get home from a through hack they realize all this junk they have that they don't need you just live for five to six months with a pack on your back that had everything you needed in it and now you get home and you're like do I really need all of these things so Coll some of that stuff from your life you know simplify minimize and even sometimes that means cooling relationships you know if you have toxic relationships in your life that they're really not doing you any good you know maybe it's time to get rid of some of that clutter too you know just whatever you think in your life will help you simplify it because again even the simplest chores and and the things that you were previously doing in normal life might seem excessive or exhausting so again finding a way to simplify and kind of streamline things so that you can focus on you know living and enjoying life keep exercising now for myself I have thought about going on some day hikes and stuff when I got back but honestly I just sorta didn't really feel like it I just felt like it would not quench the thirst of the trail that I actually desired you know I wanted another thru-hike and I just thought you know a day hike is not gonna satisfy me it's not what I'm wanting but it actually does help it really does just to get out exercise be a part of nature again when I finally did get myself out on some local trails around here it really made me feel a lot better and you know reconnected with nature and I realized that I really did miss not just a tee but nature itself you could even start running you know go to the gym do some climbing I know a lot of through hackers who when they get done with that long of a backpacking trip they're like hey I can't get out there and do this again immediately but they end up going to a climbing gym or finding some spots locally and kind of get into a new outdoors activity I would say having some additional financial cushion for when you get done is pretty important I think when folks get off the trail they're broke they're worn out and the last thing they want to do is go straight into another job so if you're able to save enough to kind have some financial cushion once you get home I really think that that could help prevent some stress on you next create some kind of plan to focus your energy on something else so every day you were working towards this goal of completing your through HACC well now you need new goals you need new plans and new ways to channel your energy into something else that that brings you happiness so for myself what I did is while I was on my through HACC I had a list going in my phone and the notes of things that I either wanted to learn about or read about or experience maybe a new skill I wanted to try and so I would list all of those things that way when I got home I would remember all of those things that I wanted to do you know post trail and I could go through that list and just kind of start marking some of them off a lot of folks are depressed when they come home because again they went from you know kind of a blah spot in life to this amazing adventure back to some blah so I think finding ways to implement something in your life that gives you passion every day is important so if that means a career change maybe starting a business you know whatever it is may be a sad hustle but something in there that gives you that drive and passion that you had on trail but maybe not exactly in the same way but but finding a way to put you know that happiness into a daily routine another thing that helped me was feeling kind of bummed out from being off trail was trying to find a way to stay connected to the trail without physically being on it every day and this channel helped me to that so being able to kind of give information on others or help other people achieve their goals in backpacking or through hacking you know it helped me stay part of that community so I would suggest you know starting a channel or a blog or if you don't want to do that then even joining some of the backpacking forums online so you can answer questions for people who are wondering how to get into backpacking or maybe even have a thru-hike plan in their future another way to potentially stay connected with the trail is to talk to some people about your experience so maybe some Boy Scout troops Girl Scout troops some of the schools locally around you I know folks have given talks at their local libraries you know any of those ways to share your experiences and maybe even inspire other people while staying connected with the trail and getting to talk about your experience I think that that helped me a lot you can also do some trail maintenance so if you live near one of these trails or you know even local trails I'm sure they're always looking for volunteers for trail maintenance and another way to stay connected is to do trail magic and if you've ever experienced realm a trek it's pretty wonderful but I think the feeling that I get when I'm giving trail magic is even better so I went in 2016 the year after I finished my through hack and did trail magic at brown gap where I had received some pretty epic trail magic and I did this trail magic with part of my tram Elise so you know again staying connected with the people whether it's the current through hackers or your past friends you know but I think maybe even doing an annual trip like that to do some trail magic with a group of people you were friends with would be a really cool way to stay connected with one another and the trail in general and one through hacker that contributed her experience with post trail depression said that it helped her a lot to look back through her pictures and videos so she really recommended taking a lot of pictures and a lot of videos that way you can always review and kind of reminisce the good times that you had one thing that really helped a lot of folks who experience post trail depression was planning their next adventure so yeah you might not be able to get done with one adventure you know take a couple weeks off and hit it on the next one again but you can go ahead and start planning whether that's saving up some money or just mapping things out you know learning more about the next trail you want to do or whatever that is putting that energy into planning the next adventure but something that I think is important to add here is to recognize that nothing is ever going to be like that first through hack again even if I went myself and through hiked the Appalachian Trail again it's not going to be the same people it's not going to be the same experience in the same weather and you know all of the new experiences again it will be different so you can never go back to that same thing and so I think realizing that like this experience was amazing and it was wonderful and I enjoy reminiscing about it but that is in the past you know it's not going to happen again so while I can appreciate that it happened and enjoy the memories it's now time to move on and make new memories and have new adventures with potentially new friends or even some of the same friends from you know the old adventure but just realizing that that life does keep going forward I think is very important finally something that I like to do and try to you know really be conscious of is the way that I bring lessons from the trail to everyday life so one example of that is realizing that there are certain things that I cannot change and I've mentioned this before but for example if it's really windy and really rainy and I'm having a backpack in it and then I have to set my tent up in it and I have to be in it for two or three days straight that's a pretty miserable experience you know it's real easy to get angry and frustrated and put all of this energy into this emotion that it's not gonna change anything so I think for myself learning to really put my energy and efforts into something that I can influence or potentially change instead of wasting it on things that you know I can't change so I don't really like to get political but for example politics and there's so many people who get fired up and and I'm not saying you know don't pay attention to what's going on in the world or anything like that but you know how much energy are you placing into something that you can't change versus you know your family and and and how happy they are and how happy you are and the things that you all do together or even growing a garden you know cut off the TV quit being mad at it and go outside and plant a garden you know I'm just saying that for myself I like remembering those lessons that I learned on trail and finding ways to implement them in my everyday life so those are my suggestions and the suggestions of others on how they dealt with post trail depression if you have been through this yourself whether it was with backpacking or some other wonderful experience or adventure I would love to hear your experience with that in the comments below you never know who you might can help and before I go the last thing I want to say is that if you're experiencing post trail depression or any kind of depression for that matter you know sometimes the things that I talked about today won't help all the way you know it's not enough so if you're feeling that way please please please do not be afraid to let somebody know that you are struggling and seek the help that you need because I know somebody loves you more than you could possibly know and cares about what you're going through even if you don't feel like they do so again you know if you're if you're having some struggles please do not be afraid to seek out the help that you might need and with that I think y'all so much for watching and we will see y'all next time you

Channel: Homemade Wanderlust

Views: 124,955

Keywords: depression, post trail depression, thru-hiker, thru-hike, backpacking, hiking, travel, self-help

Id: J32b4G_eEQ8

Length: 18min 37sec (1117 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 23 2019