Honest Trailers | The Transformers: The Movie (1986)

[Music] you're so burned out after 10 years of Transformers bayham she's a minor we'll protective mother Romeo and Juliet laws statute 2705-3 let you kind of skip the only good one but before Paramount resorts to bestiality return to a film so 80s two different robots turn into boomboxes and their cassette tapes fight each other [Music] Bodacious the Transformers the movie buckle up for a film that feels like Game of Thrones but for cartoon robots that turn into things two opposing sides of murder Bots murder the out of each other for 90 minutes great that doesn't even pause to mourn the deaths of long-running characters until they force children to watch the live slowly drain from Optimus Prime's body because the only thing more ruthless than this script is the Shameless corporate breed that inspired it the reality is at the time it was a toy show we just thought we were killing off the old product line introducing the new products gnarly you're used to a world where Transformers movies are 90 Josh dumel 10 fighting robots now watch them flip that ratio for better or worse [Music] in this Timeless Adventure about a new generation of Autobots tasked to save Cybertron and wow it does not go over them tremble and fear at the dawn of Unicron a planet eating God that's part Galactus and part Mega made from Spaceballs he's voiced by Cinema Legend Orson Wells or at least the dying wheezes of Cinema Legend Orson Wells buried under layers of sin [Music] in a performance he couldn't have cared less about if it were a Paul Mason wine commercial action please ah the French champagne has always been celebrated for its excellence are you ready to rock because this movie has the best 80s music since Rocky IV featuring the composer who scored Rocky IV with enough hair metal jammed into every second to kick off a combiner's worth of 80 satanic Panic featuring hits like Stan Bush's power Rock ballad the Touch You Got The Touch Stan Bush's powerock ballot the touch again you got the touch and Stan Bush's power Rock ballad the touch one more time for good measure a Rock ballad so powerful Stan Bush wrote it for Sylvester Stallone's Cobra and is probably why Mark Wahlberg doing the franchise down the line We Salute You Mr Bush tired of modern Transformers franchises that take forever to get to the fan favorite cash heads I mean characters well strap in as Hasbro desperately tries to hold the attention of an eight-year-old audience all hopped up on New Coke I'm trying to get them into the shuttle Ultra Magnus because I know he can't watch the shuttle until I get into the shuttle I can't from the insecticons to the Dinobots Dinobots destroy devastation radar to the Constructor cards the shark decons the courtesans and their cruel mastersounds to a living version of the junkyard where all of these toys live now [Music] go let them all no seriously by law we're not allowed to finish the trailer until you go buy a toy after the film is done killing childhoods me the replacement parts like Ultra Magnus another big truck but without the nuts cup and hot rod just bought it I can't deal with that now blur a cocaine what does that means what about me RC the only female Transformer who raises all the same uncomfortable questions posed by the existence of Smurfette wheelie a weird rhyming homeschooled kid Judd Nelson's hot rod who's not the stepdad but the dad who stepped up fish are jumping today hi Dano and Daniel widwickey a child both adopted and abandoned by the Autobots what do I do creating a bloodline so traumatized it would one day produce Shia LaBeouf no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no so returned to the year 2005. it is the year 2005. for a toy commercial that has no right to kick as much as it does I got better things to do tonight that may be kind of light on your actual favorite Transformers soon I shall be one with the Matrix but hey look it's Astro train he turns into a train that's also a rocket that's pretty cool right I mean you never know when you're gonna need a old-timey space train who's also a rocket why don't we kill this guy off again catch the surprise return of Optimus Prime coming soon to the Transformer oh thank Primus starring dogs like a truck truck truck we have Optimus Prime at home I think I'm a gun now orbit Wells unsolved matrices is that Canon I'm the Scatman people G is for Grimlock they're good enough for me ancient aliens that are also robots the storyline energize is a hell of a drug real Autobots have curves my name is Danny the D is for dingus King for a Day and okay the cool charismatic guy with a sword is right there and he's not getting the Matrix the assassination of Optimus Prime by the coward Hasbro hey if you thought this movie was too much for kids wait until breast force and Headmaster show up Transformers can be weird man here's Optimus Prime my name is Optimus Prime and I like to say things like no matter the cost give me your face by the power of Grace call I have the power I am going to turn into a truck now

Channel: Screen Junkies

Views: 774,326

Keywords: screenjunkies, screen junkies, honest trailers, honest trailer, the transformers trailer, transformers, transformers the movie, optimus prime, honest trailers transformers, honest trailers transformers the movie, honest trailer transformers the movie, honest trailer transformers

Id: ub12DkmRUnI

Length: 6min 52sec (412 seconds)

Published: Tue Jun 06 2023