- I have this friend, we
do everything together. We go to networking
events, we work together and we party together. My dilemna lately is I feel like I'm kind of being the person who
initiates everything and I'm not getting, like, reciprocally, like, asked to go out. So, like, I'll find stuff to do and I always end up being
the designated driver because she wants to
get really really drunk. And, I just kind of feel like
friendship should be 50/50. And, I kind of don't know
if I'm being used or not. So, whatcha got? - Well so you are in a
one-sided relationship. You're her friend. She's not really your friend. And, you know, you have to decide if, let me ask you a question. If you didn't do any of
these things with her, would you miss her? - No. (audience expressing bewilderment) (audience laughing) (audience clapping) She kind of just like, she's
one of those people who's, like, we started our job at the same time, so she's kind of just
been like a coworker. And, so we've hung out together and like, she seems to really care, but at the end of the day, like does she? And, that's like, kind of where I am like, no, she doesn't. But... - Here's how you know you've gotta friend. Call 'em up, tell 'em your car broke down. Tell 'em you need a ride
to work four days in a row. You're going to find out right away. If I got a friend that ain't
there for me in the clutch, if they show up, showtime players. Then, dog, we not friends. 61 years old, I have two show up for no matter what, dude. (audience applauding) I gotta pawn that car, right now. He'll come for me. (audience applauding) Two. 61 years of living, two of them people. Two! But, no matter what happen they coming. Two. You're young. - Yeah. - How many do you think you got right now? - Um, I think I have five right now. - Five? Whew. - (laughs) - Five is a big number. I hope you're right. Five, you can ask most grown
people, five is a big number. In the clutch players? Who in here has five go to friends, do anything for you no
matter what you ask? Five, how about four? Cool, four. How about three? There we go, see now we starting
to get into that number. Two? Now, one? Who in here ain't got nobody? (audience laughing) (laughs) (audience clapping) Yeah, and I gotta tell you something. That is so true, man. Don't feel bad. You got five, cut her loose. Cut her lose, enjoy yourself. Hey, let's have a good time today, y'all. We'll be right back! (audience cheering) (upbeat music)
