HALF and HALF full Episodes 2023🌸🌲The Big Sexism in the City 🌸🌲HALF and HALF full Season

on your tongue and say the first thing that comes to mind grapey good unless it's that hello hello look at all these open balls of liquor am I in heaven on the backseat of my mother's Monte Carlo timing a connoisseur has arrived oh my yes nothing chases my happy pills faster creepy good that's what I said how have things been progressing at the sports agency fine great oh who am I kidding it's crap I'm halfway through the six months I was given to prove myself and all I've proven is that I look really hot in a business suit well at least the three months weren't wasted if I don't sign a client of my own and show my boss that I'm an amazing agent I'll go back to living on a budget and making sensible shopping choices I won't go back to that hellish life when I asked about the agency I was really less concerned with the ins and outs of it and more concerned with the rich NBA players that you're meeting dating and potentially marrying so let's start again who are you meeting dating and potentially marrying through this journey of discover this journey [Music] [Music] [Music] me [Music] hey Brett got a second absolutely let's walk and talk Thorn try and keep up I always do not so far well I put together a list of athletes without representation that I'm gonna go after tell me what you think yeah sure let's see Taylor's rotator cuff is trashed Johnson's career is over next season oh Carmelo Anthony just signed with BDA this morning so you were like this close to getting him that's heartbreaking all right it's Ryan signs white Mitchell that's very cute sounds like a great way to waste your last three months here not only did every agent in the sports world has already gone after this guy and failed well like you know wouldn't technically say oh so brother Mahoney failed something hey hey failed especially when the town possible white Mitchell doesn't trust any agents oh was this before or after he met you his wife Alana is an attorney who negotiated a pretty decent NBA contract for him besides he hates anyone in the suit well his wife can't possibly get him the endorsements that I can and that's where the crazy money is and in your case maybe Dwight didn't hate the suit maybe it was your hanky do you own like a hundred of these you know I don't know why you're trying so hard because it's not likely you're gonna thrive in this business storm I mean generally speaking athletes are more interested in sleeping with women than being represented by them [Music] you think you're talking to there's no difference between the two of us God says there is yeah I'm tired of you constantly reminding me that I am a woman at the end of this week this woman will have Dwight Mitchell as a client and you'll just have your hanky uh you know uh Thorn I mean don't get me wrong I I love women my housekeeper's a woman you know my uh ex-fiance is a woman and the person ending this ridiculous conversation a woman and the person who's not going to be working here much longer a woman [Music] all right here's what I've learned about wines red needs to breathe not all whites need to be chilled and pink goes in a box in your crazy aunt's trailer people on learning so I can keep on sampling look who's here [Music] well I meant your father but whatever I thought you weren't allowed to watch him after big DD found you asleep and Drew trapped under a giant pile of wigs tonight's an emergency these spotted immigracion near the house so she grabbed the maids and The Nanny and they hold up and Neiman until the heat dies down sometimes I think she loves to help more than me don't just thinking my God you would not believe the day that I have had true it's like I'm invisible oh cheesy Brett the person who's supposed to be showing me the ropes at the agency is a freaking pig and not only is there a glass ceiling at work but Brett is standing on it smiling down at me and giving me the finger but you would never treat a woman like that would you would you that's right because you know women can Crush men and you're scaring my boy you're scaring me what happened Brett told me that I will never be a successful agent because between ears he said what you heard that I'm the father of two daughters when you started puberty my hearing improved well Brett's just trying to get inside my head so I'll fail but I cannot fail I will not fail daddy bring Drew by when you're done here so I can tell him the story of the little agent that could wow things are so much different at delicious the worst thing I've experienced is Adam staring longingly at my chest he does the same thing to me I can't believe my little girl's gotta put up with this Brett guy I agree creating a hostile work environment based on gender is cause for action con sent me to a sexual harassment seminar I have to ask how many licks it took to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop hey what are you doing here probably the same thing you're doing here good we'll handle did his little problem together her office is on the 15th floor let's do this Chester my name is not Chester fake name Smart in that case my name is not Charles it's shaft oh Lorenzo hey Mona um long time no see you've been hiding from me last time I saw you you kissed me on the forehead there's nothing more to say except she got a man how you feel about that oh well we're still neighbors uh maybe we can get together sometime I guess you didn't hear me the first time she got a man so it's true what they say you really can't reheat a souffle oh you did anything wait wait we're talking about food right I know your restaurant has a strict policy against interrupting patrons but I really need to speak to Dwight Mitchell it's just that stop hanging up on me hey we came to cheer you up we've got Million Dollar Baby monster and Kill Bill and a box of milk does as big as your daddy's head I wish I wasn't so busy trying to get to Dwight because a movie about killing men really sounds delightful well Mom and I swear by these movie marathons women who are worse off than you a couple of those movies might skip with Mona's life we've used them a lot aren't you uh Didi's friend yeah and I'm Didi's father oh we'll see how nice it is after we're done Didi told us how you've been treating her you must have forgot every little girl has a daddy what's going on here guys you know what this is yeah well bro I'm glad we could work out a little misunderstanding absolutely absolutely I'm gonna have my assistant messing you guys those tickets first thing in the morning Courtside right hey cheerleaders up close you the man Brett no no no you uh both the man now that's how you do it yeah Diddy's gonna thank us when she hears how we straighten bread out Chester it's Spencer it's just me let the fake name go girl you are wearing those floors out but I can't even get close to Dwight Mitchell cell phone blocked email returned home phone click I need a new strategy what would an aggressive conniving ruthless man do you know what you need I'll tell you what you need you need a resourceful smart sexy lady oh do you think your mom is available stop talking about me I can hunt down anybody a little skill I use in one of my crazy skips out on the therapy bill you give me the make and model Dwight's car and I will call my friend at the DMV and get his butt towed right to your doorstep she can do it too that's how she got my prom date to show up good morning I thought Mahoney Hey listen I just wanted to thank you for sending your father and his Thug to Ambush me last night I didn't save anybody and the only Thug my father has is my mother so you don't know anyone by the name of shaft Thorne or Chester oh yes they did yeah it seems they're very concerned with a hard time you're having fitting into our little family here especially shaft you just don't see that kind of caring in the Sports World you know maybe you're ushering in a whole new era you know what's next puppies crying pink uniforms excuse me but I think I hear my phone ringing yeah well don't worry Thorne I assure them things would be different from now on and I also filled the rest of the staff in on your special needs daddy's little girl yeah I swear I did not do that I was the first person to laugh when I saw it though thank you I'm back down I'm still laughing I can't believe dad and Spencer had it in them but if it makes you feel any better and nobody's ever stood up for me like that let me tell you a little story the place the churro Shack the time am I not suffering enough okay the middle class has stories to tell too go ahead baby tell your tail I was a young girl needing dough under the Hot Summer Sun at Six Flags my co-worker artimio would mold his dough into obscene shapes and forced me to fry them now I was too afraid to report him so I just ate the dirty churros quickly so the children wouldn't see them though I gained 20 pounds at summer I was fired for not fitting in my uniform that's it you're my kid and I'm bored the point is I always regretted not fighting back and artimearoo and my love of deep fried dough for a week I can't tell you how many times I was skipped over for promotions because I was a woman but I never did say anything because I needed the job and I was a single mother to miss eyepatch orthopedic shoes cavity and every tooth over here a chance to do what we didn't do got to show the guys in your office that you're not the incapable fragile female they think you are and I'm going to help you because you got me fired up I love it two sisters in a little boys club takedown well how come only mona can help you sit next to the most vindictive woman in town and by vindictive she means crazy and by town she means planet well that was a bust this is my kind of gym the two-year wait list just for a membership if I can't get a membership I can't work out it's perfect we're just gonna have to go with plan B we'll wait for Dwight to come out after he trains then I'll pounce his endorphins will be flowing he'll be in a good mood and receptive to my pitch or he'll be tired sweaty and annoyed at the sight of you hey there's a coffee cart I'll treat okay but let's make it fast oh my god there he is [Music] I mean you ladies are beautiful but I'm happily married here's a little something to remember me by thanks for being fans he thinks I'm just a groupie he thinks I'm beautiful [Music] please let mother take you to dinner and cheer you up don't you and Daddy have to go to your Bay Area Realtors cocktail mixer ah I hate that thing all those snobby Society doing what to do is brag about their Aston Martins their diamonds and their stupid old dogs it's maddening foreign well I'm gonna pass on dinner this whole thing at work has ruined my appetite I wish your father would take me to his chat with Brett I'd have shown that boys Dario what I learned as a Tallahassee Rockette your mother can kick like a horse its job would be challenging but being real that's because you're trying to act like a man and if you keep doing that you will always be at a disadvantage as a woman you have abilities men don't that's where your power lies I've never thought about it that way I've been trying to play this game like a man would I forgot what I'm capable of now you're cooking with estrogen and if you have any left over you should give it to Phyllis she's looking a little Nanny godish around the chin this Spa is amazing but are you sure we're gonna find twice White's wife here yeah pretty sure because she's right there some backup you are you don't even know who the Mark is okay now here's the plan I'm gonna introduce myself to Alana work my magic you watch the door I don't want to watch the door watch the door at the gym you see how that went and clear the room do you think you can do that I've been doing it since elementary school excuse me ma'am it's time for your treatment I've already had my treatment well it's buy one get one free day well in that case should I get the salt water scrub or the seaweed wrap I don't care just get out Alana Mitchell hi my name is Dede Thorne and this is the quiet room let's take advantage of that you need some muscle you want me to throw her off her chair perhaps you two would be more comfortable at the city pool hi sorry we're um sports agent smooth maybe next time you should be the muscle all right and I'll work night and day to make sure that your husband gets the best treatment the sports world has to offer Dwight Mitchell belongs at GMG you don't think we've heard any of that before Dwight gets approached every week by hungry young agents giving him the same line admittedly none of them have ever done it in a fluffy robe well it's my own unique style but the other thing that none of them have is my energy drive and passion I can promise no one will work harder for Dwight than me I'm proud of the work that I've done for my husband everyone who comes to US thinks that they can replace me oh I don't want to replace you I want to work with you he is a powerhouse on the basketball court and you've obviously got the brains in the business savvy I just want to join your team and take Dwight to the next level Alana I know that you have never trusted agents but you can trust me and I'll have all the men at GMG working for us um how much longer are you guys going to be because there's a group of angry women out there and they're threatening to snap me with their towels so Alana what do you say give me a shot [Music] good morning Lord hey should I hide my office any more of your family on their way in sorry Mahoney you can't get to me today give it time hey DD Alana Dwight thanks for coming down my office is right over here you look familiar have I turned you down before well you know I wouldn't technically say it yeah yeah I thought I recognized that uh fancy uh pocket thingy you got what do you have like a hundred of those um why didn't you two wait my office and I'll be in in one second hey Brett would you mind getting my clients some water they may get a little dehydrated from all the paperwork they need to go over thanks hey hey how did you land Mitchell never underestimate the power of women now if you'll excuse me daddy's little girl needs to sign the unattainable client and feel free to spread that around the office thank you [Applause] [Laughter] back to work okay Chef Thorn and Chester Stan your male instinct protect me and I know there was love behind that but if you ever get involved in my business again I cannot be responsible for my actions honey I was just trying I know what you were trying to do try less is she so dreadless I think she did talking to me now your daddy Brett mentioned something about courtside seats she knows about this hand him over show some mercy woman show some tickets shaft cheerleaders dancing in front of you and hot dogs brought to your seat you're taking away all that's good in the world now that's how you do a Shakedown [Music] foreign [Music] hibiscus I wanted to congratulate you on your recent success let me show you how proud I am I want you a little something to wear to the Showcase my daughter doesn't need your fancy designer dressed it's amazing I'll take it Blended your father may be out of town but I'll be there I mean we can't have you wearing an outfit your mother whipped up out of old curtains why not you married what I whipped up out of old husbands [Music] wow TD that was really nice of your mom that's one less thing I have to worry about for the Showcase oh well one of my class loads really light right now I can be your executive assistant thanks I need all the help I could get I've been so stressed out I can't remember feeling this paralyzed about making a decision moon are you pick Talon all the time why are you suddenly freaked out well I guess because I'm so invested in all the artists I mean how am I going to choose just one of them maybe it'll help if you just keep an eye on Jimmy and Terry and see who they're leaning towards that's not a bad idea you're saying that like you're surprised why is she saying it like she's surprised should be real fun man yeah I got the five envelopes right here we'll go ahead and do what I think you have any early favorites well since we haven't heard anybody sing yet I'd have to say no right smart that's why you're jamming Lewis I want to welcome everybody to what we like to call our domain and that's the recording studio what we're going to do is we're going to have each of you all take one of these envelopes and in these envelopes there's going to be some songs now we know y'all know how to do your own songs but what about some other people's songs let's see what kind of style and Grace you can put on somebody else's song Yes Grace envelope shuffling by Terry Lewis my partner thank you Terry Lewis you do a wonderful job shuffling those envelopes you will have five minutes to prepare your rendition of whatever song that is happens to be in there y'all work it out we'll be back yes all right we won't Perfection yes [Music] my goodness [Music] [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Applause] oh man well that's okay we're gonna get you five minutes you do your thing okay you want that secret decoder belt buckle you got you know send out his SOS or something yeah [Music] Let Freedom reign Let Freedom Little Star one more time [Music] I wonder what you were definitely made that choice [Music] all right chip how you feeling dude yeah I'm all right all right have fun man [Music] I know what I was gonna say you know we can always fix notes if the notes are wrong but we can't fix emotion there's no machine that does that only you can do that so give me the emotion even if you're gonna miss the note still give me the emotion okay can I say one thing you can see have you been in love oh yeah it's that like what would you do to keep her from walking out that door that's deep [Music] great job man appreciate it how was that you like that was that good what are you feeling I like that if I was your girl I would have had to walk back in [Music] all right well I will be all right too yeah oh here's the thing though I like that laugh because see that's what the song is to me the course is very rejoiceful I'm gonna be all right and when you say that if you smile when you sing that we can hear that okay okay trust me okay so just remember everything you said don't remember it just yeah and now forget everything I said and just have fun and sing that's the key you have anything to say uh your your song is beautiful you are beautiful um and you sound great so know that and and like they were saying just let it shine okay yeah thank you Paula yes can I say something no hello ladies hello which one is Tiffany and which one is the other one I'm about to say I'm surreal what's wrong with me I'm Tiffany here we go give it to us [Music] [Applause] you got the concert if y'all hit it real nice thank you yeah lovely Greg and Zayna hello yes I like when you all do stuff together I mean that's part of you know being a Duo so while he's rapping go ahead and inject your little stuff in there while he's rapping you yeah just do your little just co-signing [Music] there you're we're looking at you too the way of looking at you the way you looking at me make me wanna Fleet of rule 112b I know you feel the same damn way you need a ride to the crib on the way we can stop fill up your belly damn your boyfriend blowing you up turn off your silly girl that's when I'm Pokey this works [Music] yeah yeah you were getting ready to do it now you hit it at the end yeah that's what I'm talking about right there that's it right yeah that comes up quick Genie you sound good there cut out drums and bass all right great love you cool here we go okay I was cool and y'all just follow right along and that's good okay broke a string in the middle sorry man ask what you do when you play aggressive I brought you a protein shake extra soy extra carob oh my God that's exactly what I wanted how did you know it's my job to anticipate your needs besides daddy taught me everything there is to know about handling a woman on the verge you know the thing you asked me to do well I did it you finally took the brothers do it mo better bumper sticker off your Cutlass that's actually what connects the bumper to the car so it looks like Jimmy's leaning toward and Terry's digging damn I thought that'd have the same favorite and then I'd know who to go with now that they're split the pressure is even worse Mona I've been thinking you've earned the right to be the lone voice of delicious in choosing who we're gonna sign so I'm stepping aside and I'm leaving it up to Jimmy Terry and what precious on girl don't let me down could you find me a couple of efforts okay that's starting to scare me Mario the Showcase is supposed to be fun why are you so miserable well this if I wasn't feeling enough pressure kind goes and makes it worse by trusting me to make the decision without her what kind of twisted freak of a boss does that that believes in you listen just a week ago you told me to trust my instincts and believe in myself it was good advice you should take it I do know everything I need you know this kind of moment could really help us sell this yeah especially if you can give him a kiss for working [Applause] should have thank you for hooking a sister up tonight is the culmination of a nationwide Talent search and one of these artists is going to be signed to our label honestly if I didn't have music in my life I would probably just go crazy [Music] when the rain comes tumbling down I can't see the tears and when it seems all hope is gone Something in My Heart shows me the way [Music] twice cause I paid the price so the Warriors will be fine no matter what the story I'm still Gonna Shine situations will happen [Music] so many many changes there are many roads I could have taken I found the peace within now I'm ready for anything but when I realized that my work was more I would hurt no more I wouldn't think twice [Music] should win because we hot to death you know what I'm saying [Music] yeah [Music] [Music] I don't really know just what it is [Music] [Music] I like [Music] thank you for getting me past that beefy security guard I hope you told them who I was I certainly did and he was a grin to have mistreated RuPaul the way he did you make about uh Tiffany and I is our sound we sound like no one else [Music] [Applause] too much [Music] [Music] and sometimes [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] I'm nervous you know so I'm kind of Blown Away already so if I pass out yeah somebody just wake me up [Music] happy eternally there more times [Music] but there's one thing that I know [Music] before babe walk through that door no more I'm strong enough [Music] can't do the things [Music] I'll be right here I'll be right here for you oh wow [Music] yeah oh tell me you love me baby you love me I love you and I love you too I do take me back [Music] apart from us something we won't miss [Music] oh baby [Music] thank you thank you what if I picked the wrong artist and Kai hates them a month from now they're waiting for you I just need a minute to calm down you look so at ease at the judges table I was fronting for jam and Louis you want to lose my cool in front of jamming Lewis the Showcase can't continue until you're out there really oh I think our greatest strength is is um working as a unit together to get what we want to get across and and do it passionately [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] my face [Music] [Music] okay Mr Dan and Mr Lewis it is time to decide and the first one up is Chip I thought chip did a nice job overall I really love the appeal that chip had especially with the ladies jumped down off the stage and had them screaming Craig and Dana in the studio Zena kind of carried it a little bit more but here live it seemed like she fell into the back I'd love to see her come out of her shell a little bit she's a better singer than I think she even knows I agree all right now yes I mean her tape was absolutely wonderful one of the one of the best of the bunch in the studio it seemed like she was a little too nervous when you get under the microscope you really have to hit it because what's most important in the record business is the record I know we could use all these artists that studio was fantastic now excellent Studio blew me away unfortunately I didn't think the live performance was white up to the par of those others elements but I will say they ended really strong that's a song that if it was on the radio I would say oh wow who's it who's this right exactly I didn't delicious science right but we are looking for an overall act that can pull it off in the studio and can sell a tour now we have our band jambalaya that is a great looking groove right here that's right a lot of diversity I thought they had a lot of energy you saw how the crowd reacted to this the energy gets energy energy does get energy but does energy make hit records and we are a record company what don't you need yeah I would like you to start Mr Lewis you're a true record executive mode I can tell now thank you I know why you got the job because you just so diplomatic so what are we gonna do we're gonna eliminate one yes one at a time I can't let go huh you start okay one at a time thank you very much everybody here is super duper super duper talented and nobody should give up on their dream this is just the first step for everybody including the person that we ultimately sign without any further ado I would like to announce that the signing for delicious records to be produced Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis delicious is [Music] foreign [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you for believing in me oh that that was a test I wanted to see if you could handle the pressure is if I had the money I would have signed them all so there was no wrong decision because to get to tonight you made five great ones thank you come owner you should be really proud you know what for the first time in a long time I really am they just saw it like Beijing is why we think that this is this is our time [Music] foreign [Music] and I'm hoping the British chick got really fat why do I ask personal questions when I really don't care why do we keep coming here in spite of the service let's put a short stack extra bacon stick me on the tip just like old times [Music] this journey [Music] so what do you want to do today I'm doing it well we have to get up eventually so we can come back and take a nap I love our weekends I love you too and our weekdays aren't bad either that reminds me my parents are coming up from Carmel for a few days I really want you to meet them oh please tell me I am the only reason they're coming into town because that's a lot of pressure my eye is already starting to Twitch relax they're coming to see me but I do want to show off my twitchy-head girlfriend are going to meet Nick's parents I am one step closer to getting me some grandbabies and it's a good thing too because you ain't good in any younger I can hear your eggs cracking in my sleep thanks ma you're my rock sounds like this thing is getting kind of serious I mean you only been dating for three months two weeks and four days foreign you know I've never met anyone's parents before all my old boyfriends claim their folks were either out of town or in the witness protection program well don't worry just act like whatever boring thing they say is the most interesting thing you've ever heard like I do with your mom I'm glad I don't have to play these silly games my man's parents are dead you're a man Whitman man who said man not me down with your bad self that's why you were asking me if thongs are comfortable okay okay I have a man why does everyone act so shocked when they hear I have a boyfriend well when you got the fifth cat we kind of thought you were done with men no I was just done telling you people about it you meet one of my men it goes to crap you're not meeting another one until we're on the dance floor at the wedding reception doing the Electric Slide Phyllis you wear thongs [Music] Alice have you seen my new extraordinarily large diamond ring just a little token of Charles's love you know when you say little token I do think a child no you can buy yourself baubles it's not wrong it's uh but not wrong oh it's so nice to have a man I know my man is sweet and handsome and he doesn't have to buy his blazes in the little boys Department if it was thinking you might want to stop want to stop control tops then cutting off the circulation to your brain go get the olives please quick here goes I'm sorry we're looking for Mona [Laughter] well um hi I'm Bob this is my wife Joan and uh and honey she's Mona so nice to meet you both come on in here you are Mickey you didn't tell us she was to a cosmopolitan well I read Cosmopolitan I drink cosmopolitans and sometimes I do both at the same time well she's a multitasker Joan yeah you've been lifting weights you look good thanks Dad I feel good I'm happy thanks to Mona [Laughter] why Moni a very beautiful girl oh curly hair you should see it in an electrical storm so how do you like San Francisco we don't streets are too narrow it's not Buick friendly I beg Nikki not to move here but he loves big cities he always had Urban taste well the city is great on the weekends we walk everywhere unless it's raining or cold or foggy or uphill we stay in a lot [Laughter] Nick excuse me could you help me with the mushroom caps oh my god did I lock the car oh well it's going great they're gonna warm up to you do you say so I mine but a lot of wine won't hurt deity deer if you ever catch me listening at your door be a good girl and put me in a tasteful Sanitarium I thought I smell Chanel number five and vodka shouldn't you be out with your man tonight he had to work late clever you've given your pretend man a pretend job I hope you at least made a pretend CEO honey my man is real and he is h-o-t really so what's his name I already told you I'm keeping him under even lying to the children I think your majesty is a serious cry for help ciao Bye Mom what you're doing is wrong I know can't hear a thing back starting to ache anyway my man's coming over later nothing kills a mood like the smell of Ben Gay back Katie what a pleasant surprise to run into by Nature Hall yeah I'm guessing it's not going very well if you're taking out the trash I've tried everything you told me with Nick's parents but nothing is working all right how about I drop in see what's going on work a little in my magic great let's go let's look a little tip when you go to take the trash out it's weird if you walk back in with it hey everybody look who I bumped into my sister Didi Didi these are Nick's parents Bob and Joe hi oh it certainly is a pleasure to meet you both Nick is such a great guy you must be so very proud of him well he hasn't disappointed us yet uh so have you tried some of Mona's delicious onion dip oh no thank you ethnic food doesn't agree with us uh mom I forgot to tell you I have a surprise for you Neil Diamond came into the studio and I got you an autographed picture tell me does the same to Joan Forever in Blue Jeans love me oh my God yes and he's wearing his American flag shirt it's with my stuff in the bedroom I'll be right back his stuff's in the bedroom [Laughter] oh uh Dede is in her second year at bolt law school yes I've loved the law since I was little they tell me that I use my rattle as a gavel well that's that's quite an achievement you know I think it's just well that colleges are giving everyone a chance these days oh what an adorable baby picture Mona is this you with your Nanny oh actually that's me with my grandma Sophie wasn't that interesting life must have been very complicated for you only at Temple Beth Malachi daycare complicated mom ENT an idea for the staff excuse me since when is onion dip considered ethnic food oh onions are consumed by a multitude of cultures no no I think I figured out why these people aren't warming up to you I think I have two I should have spent the money on the shrimp kebabs I don't know what we're gonna do Bob I thought he was out of his face well you know it's our own fault who should never have let him put that Vanessa Williams poster in his bedroom you still thinking it's your food Vanessa [Laughter] sorry Mona you all look alike to me so unreal I mean I'm Charming and I'm smart enough for Nick's parents I'm just not white enough too bad they haven't seen you dance sorry but let's keep it real believe Nick was raised by such narrow-minded people well haven't you Nick ever talked about the fact that you're black and he's white no well it's never been an issue between us until now wow talk about a big elephant in the room or in this case it's more like a zebra Panda or a skunk did I get it Mona you have talking ruins everything I just want this to work out well it's never going to unless you talk to him it's either that or give up all your favorite ethnic foods like sour cream and celery wow this is a really nice place so quiet and intimate you know it's a perfect place to talk about things like us and things about us I know that's why I picked so Nick there's something I wanted to talk to you I ordered it when I made the reservation I love this song I know we listen to this on our first date oh that's sweet but Nick there's something I need to talk to you it looks like there's something floating in your sangria hello you know what this means free meal and if I swallow it lawsuit it looks like there's something tied at the end of a string foreign it's a little key that's weird because I have this little box why don't you see if the key fits okay oh Nick you know I realized the day that we met that I'd fall in love with you but you never know how these things are going to play out like I didn't know how much I'd love standing next to you I'm hearing you laugh and then snort and then laugh again I love those moments and I can't imagine a day without them or you [Music] I want you to ride off into the future with me oh [Music] Mona will you marry me yes [Applause] yes [Music] hey guys sorry I'm late I guess you're wondering why I've called you all here yeah let me just say up front I need both my kidneys no I'm getting married that's a spirit you just keep saying it to yourself and one day it'll come true yes Nick proposed to me see oh Lord have mercy my baby is getting married I'm happy for you [Music] congratulations so that talk with Nick must have gone well actually I didn't get to it oh well yay for you I've gotta run and get my ring sized it almost slipped off this morning while I was making it Sparkle into oncoming traffic [Music] congratulations great okay Angel first this is some serious bull Hey listen he's some grand babies but I am not happy about this and you want to know why I'm not happy about this she's only been seeing Nick a few measly months three months two weeks and six days roughly wow you're a pair of binoculars and a photo collage away from being a stalker yeah marriage is a Shin too if I'd known your father better I never would have married him hell I never would have let him pump my gas yeah I mean is Nickerson me the person who knows her better than anybody the guy who stood by her year after year since their freshman year in college is Nick that brother well to be fair there's not many people who fit that bill but I do agree that something about this isn't right when this whole thing Falls to pieces and it will because hey it is her give the pretty boy my number I know this may be hard to believe but I'm desperate [Music] what are you doing up it's like three in the morning I have to get this off my chest Mona I've watched a lot of people get married and some of those weddings were wonderful and some I just knew weren't right but I kept my mouth shut and now those people are bitter divorces surfing for Love on the internet if you're talking about my mom she's doing the best she can think about you life would be with Nick's parents who clearly don't celebrate MLK Day are you sure you want to marry Nick if I were would it be up in the middle of the night watching The Facts of Life wondering what advice Mrs Garrett would be giving Tooty in the situation then why did you tell Nick yes there was a man who loves me on his knee with a ring and a horse and a carriage and I got swept up in the moment I don't know am I just an idiot yes you are nice outfit did your new man pick it out oh is it a frequent buyer gift from the Salvation Army say motherhood agrees with you Victor you are absolutely glowing why are you in such a good mood no reason just had a romantic lunch with my boyfriend have a lovely day ah oh my gosh she does have a man I forgot to mention your hair looks especially nice today bye and she says sex with them too [Laughter] hey hey where do you want to go for dinner tonight Thailand China Morocco and who says I don't take my baby places [Laughter] we need to talk to talk you know I've never liked those four words together in a sentence Nick I think we need to slow things down we what do you mean slow things down have you checked your hand lately we're engaged I know but we've only been together for a few months and there's something else great because I love the first thing so much your parents don't seem to like me very much I told you they were conservative that's one word for it Mona every relationship has its challenges for us it's my parents you're not marrying them you're marrying me but marriage is supposed to be the union of two families who start off loving each other and then grow to hate each other over time not the other way around so what exactly do you want to do I don't know but I don't want to lose you so can't we just keep on dating but I want to marry you think that could happen one day can't answer that question I think you just did I'm sorry Nick I'm sorry too I hope you find who you're meant to be with Mona you can't marry Nick he said hey oh yeah uh catch the game last night relax we're not getting married goodbye mom [Music] you okay no you want me to go no yes can't believe I just let Nick walk out the door believe it's over I'm sorry Mama I'm glad you're here I don't know why you're here but I'm glad you are we've been friends for a long time I guess I just know when you need me it's okay if I cry on your shoulder that's what it's dead for [Music] it for [Music] smell is coming from your refrigerator but you hardly keep anything in there except batteries and mayonnaise I also keep the occasional box of baking soda although I don't find they work after three years well hello lovely lady that is a wonderful perfume you're wearing it's called Dove you might want to try some and she's funny too I like that you know what else is funny you trying to waste time and drive up the bill so you can keep the compliments flowing but the clock stops here okay just had to replace a coil here's your invoice great and my friends wonder why I do white women sorry what are you apologizing for fix his game because it's weak at least he's in the game you're not even circling the stadium [Applause] I dated this year and you remember what that got me a broken heart and I went up a size of my eating pants even more reason to get back out there look at me I've dated guys who don't have jobs guys who lie guys who lie about having jobs and still I'm committed to going out every Friday night and you should be too not all men are bad I know that just the ones that are drawn to us [Music] [Music] I want a daily report on the situation until it's resolved I would tell your father to wrap it up but I love seeing him so forceful somewhere other than the bedroom how some things are better left unsaid that would be one of them I can't believe this tenant downstairs he's three months behind on the rent at Mysterio Theory I've never actually seen him but I know he lives there because Mona steals his Sunday New York Times she likes to take it to breakfast to look smart yeah well she's gonna have to start getting her own subscription because I'm about to begin eviction proceedings oh long drawn out eviction proceedings well it's not all bad I have been itching to transform one of these apartments into a closet devote some great investment this building turned out to be now I have three tenants that don't pay rent safe and happy and developing a loving sisterly Bond can you really put a price on that yes Ramona's and 26.50 for yours since the remodeling well I can't help with the rent but I can't help with the eviction we just covered this in property law I can deal with this situation aggressively and with big scary sounding words there is no one more aggressive than Didi when she is backed into a corner she growls shows her teeth arches at back wait that's Coco it's nice of you to offer baby girl but I think I need to get somebody that knows what they're doing yeah excuse me I know what I'm doing I know you're disappointed but remember sometimes we must smile throughout sadness just like your father did when he was married to Phyllis yes check out this cool eviction notice I just made dad is gonna take me so super serious after this I don't know Didi dad told you to stay out of this and this isn't the first time you haven't listened you're remember the fish incident dad told you to stay away from a saltwater tank fish sandwiches oh where'd you get this I scooped him out of the fish tank just like at the fancy restaurants my yellow goby you're gonna get it Mona how many times have I told you not to let your little sister out of your sight when I'm not around yeah Mona how many times well you were supposed to be watching me look I know what I'm doing with this tenant if he listens to reason I won't even need to use this phony eviction notice well this whole process wait till after Sunday I don't want to have to pay five bucks just to find out the answers to last week's crossword okay I wouldn't normally ask for compliments but I am still recovering from jamming a mascara wand in my eye how do I look you look good enough huh well luckily I'm meeting Sammy at Bar deluxe which is dimly lit therefore very Mona friendly well I hope there's a repairman in here because I got something that needs fixing Phyllis you look hot sir go ahead at him while he's talking I bet Lily he seems to always be complimenting you and creeping me out besides I'm good enough and she's hot what's up with that hey I agreed on the Curve so where are you going with your fancy sales wherever you're going I'm taking you up on your offer to go out Friday night and it's Friday night so let's go out go out like you'd go one place and I'd go another well that's not what I thought so let's go oh and you're driving Mama might want to have a drink or two come on Mona go out with your moms you're the one who encouraged her and who knows maybe she'll pay and she did dust off her Matrix outfit but if I don't take her I'll never hear the end of it and I'll never get to watch all the stuff I recorded on your TiVo okay Ma let's go I can't wait to get down with my bad self it's times like this I'm glad my mom lives 30 000 miles away Phyllis what an exciting Ensemble what are you doing 1983 yes and while I'm there I'll say hi to your original nose jawline and teeth ah the baron can be so bitter and the fertile can be so fat I'm pregnant Phyllis at least one of us can prove they've had sex this year let's go mom are there free hot wings a far before nine so what do you drink a palm teeny it's made with pomegranate juice and vodka always order a vodka drink more bang for your buck that's my Thrifty baby hey a table's opening up let's sit over there so we can watch people come here to watch We Came To Turn the Beat Around hey don't date yourself and nobody else will and second don't leave your drink unattended I might drink it I can leave by 1 30. and why is this because after that a fight always breaks out over the last single guy at the bar and I'm tired of losing I guess this is a lot to learn in one night honey I was working the scene before you were twinkling your father's eyes how do you think you got here unplanned pregnancy don't remind me of sex with your father to kill my buzz before I even get it so what do you do next well I'll wait for my first drink to kick in then I make a lap around the bar to check out the perspectives and let them check me out as I wiggle the goods all while holding in my stomach and it goes a little something like this [Laughter] see it's easy easy to make a fool of yourself you didn't look like you were looking for a man you look like you were looking for a bathroom really what would you have done differently my version goes a little something like this [Laughter] well if you wanted attention you got it George Jefferson let's give it time I couldn't help but notice that unique walk of yours you'll love my dance watch and learn newbies Ian Rogers Diddy Thorne fellow tenants second year law student oh yeah your sister steals my paper I have no knowledge of that but I was hoping you might have a few minutes to chat absolutely come on in this place is lovely and very well decorated for a deadbeat ah cutting to the chase are we yes and I see you've got a disconnected smoke detector you pulled up the carpets and you've got faux painted walls all which violate your tenant agreement but came out beautifully if you find rental infractions such a turn on you should see my kitchen I have an indoor gorilla no vent maybe later like tomorrow when you're moving out I've got an eviction notice right here but I'd rather it not come to that I wondered how long it would be before you were here doing the Daddy's Dirty Work but then butting in really is your way isn't it have you been spying on me oh please you people play out half your lives in the hallway you might want to try solving your family drama in your own apartment this isn't about me and I suggest you cut your losses rather than face my father in court well then I guess I have no choice wow fix this in 60 Seconds myself to a manicure you leave me no choice but to report your father to the Housing Commission what I know all about the violations committed to redo your apartment I have no knowledge of that Daddy Let me refresh you turned an attic into a one-bedroom apartment without permits for a full kitchen jacuzzi tub or skylights and how do you know this you're not the only one who's nosed around so let me tell you how it's going to be you back off or you're going to be sorry you ever showed up at my door the fines for your father will be plenty more than a few months rent and I'd hate to add fraud charges for that fake eviction notice you wouldn't want to visit your daddy in jail now would you guess all I can say is see you at the tenant potluck hey Mona what's popping another thing Sammy unless you count all the people my mom's hooking up oh you're hot with your mom what's up with that does she only have like two weeks to live or something no such luck oh this is worse than when she stood up at graduation and yeah that's my baby baby you go girl get that 10 minutes ago no now she's trying to hook me up I have somebody who wants to meet you Ma I can meet my own Men first of all no you can't second of all I was talking to Sammy Sammy this is Jason oh I always thought your mom was really cool going to the bar with my mom was the worst night out I've ever had come on Mona we've hung out with your moms before and had a good time well going out to dinner is different than when she's playing Matchmaker me writing her number on the bartender's arm or Yelling to the busboy to back that ass up damn I can't believe I stayed home catching up on the sex ed Channel just making sure there's nothing new I didn't know about there wasn't now what did you do while your mom was partying I guarded the purses you guys are not gonna believe this I really screwed things up with that tenant in 3B and now that Squad is threatening to send Daddy to The Big House have you people all you need to do is tell Dad what you did the first step is admitting you're wrong I have no training in that this and Dad will always question my abilities see this is what helping does it messes everything up one second you're giving innocent advice and the next thing your mom's in her skin type pants wearing her Saturday night ponytail Mona guard at the purses tonight [Music] about something hypothetically sure so I have a friend who's created a bit of a mess so this friend was doing his or her best to please his or her parent and now his or her behind is on the line so you got involved with that tenant huh I thought I could get the guy out but he was sneakier than I am and now I'm wondering if I have what it takes to be a lawyer of course you've got what it takes Little D remember when I ran for chairman of the yacht club charity Bazaar but then Laney Grimshaw the prune with the Platinum Walker stole it from me do you recall the advice you gave me I told you that she was old and if it meant that much to her you should let her have it but I didn't listen instead I snooped around until I discovered that Laney was using the Walker as part of an insurance scam and to get the big stall in The Boathouse bathroom you see what I'm telling you I think so sometimes you can't follow the letter of the law you gotta follow your gut and if you're dealing with dirt you gotta Play Dirty so I should dig up something on Ian and find a way to use it against him if that's not lawyer thinking I don't know what it is hahaha so if you ever had a palm teenie no but I like to nah I didn't expect to see you at our spot two nights in a row well I was hoping our spot wouldn't be so crowded tonight and who is this handsome stranger this is Chris Chris this is her friend Phyllis you set up my friend with that chick Sammy excuse me for a sec Chris so how is that going anywhere Ma I really like this guy so would you mind leaving us alone fine there are plenty of eligibles here all I have to do is walk by and let my Gina take work its magic when I said leave us alone I meant leave the building why I don't want you here this is my spot not our spot that is no way to talk to your girlfriend friend you're my mother and I wish you would act like it sorry I thought a mother could be a friend Katie come in I would say this is a surprise but there was no denying the vibe between us the other man you're right about picking up on a vibe it's the vibe of a girl who gets what she wants and I want you out of here I really thought you were a lot smarter but you're obviously not if you continue to annoy me I thought you were a lot smarter too but if you were you would have worked a lot harder to cover up your secret that you're an illegal alien that's ridiculous rent paid in money orders got me curious and then I noticed that your phone bill was in someone else's name I guess those pesky bank and phone people require a social security number that you don't have uh it sounds pretty flimsy to me rental at ambition and Cod your last place of employment it seems someone's work visa expired several months ago that same someone stopped paying rent soon after I think I need to sit down I think you need a new place to live by Friday by the way illegal immigration status Trump's building code violations you know you're not a very nice person I don't have to be nice I'm gonna be a lawyer don't worry I'm not staying I just can't get my hanging out slippers since we're not going to be doing that anymore I figure they don't need to be here Ma I'm sorry I didn't mean for what I said to come out that way the thing is as much as I love you you're kind of cramping my style and the little style I've got can't afford to be cramped look you were the one who told me to get back out there but I didn't know you were gonna go there with me and you were Never Gonna Leave imagine Grandma out clubbing with you oh baby can you ever forgive me yes and I love the fact that you're still a vibrant fun-loving woman I just think that you could be vibrant and fun loving somewhere else and to that end I did a city search online and compiled a list of all the bars for people over 40. it's called the last stop I appreciate the effort but I think I'll do my own search in fact I think I'm gonna start right now you got all those phone numbers from the guys at Bar deluxe yeah and a few at Baskin Robbins hey I was really upset about what you said to me well while you go through those how about if I still keep these here these are washable right let's check the smoke alarm in the bedroom hey Dad ah there's my future attorney nicely done you know I'm gonna have to stop thinking of you as my baby and start seeing you as a grown-up professional woman I like that but you realize you're going to have to be a grown-up professional woman without an 800 square foot hat and Shoe Closet [Music] thank you

Channel: 90s Old Movies

Views: 41,860

Keywords: What's Happening, What's Happening arthur, What's Happening full episodes, HALF and HALF, HALF and HALF Full Episodes, What's Happening then and now, 227 then and now, What's Happening theme, 227 tv show, 227, 227 2023, 227 full episodes, 227 pilot, ONE on ONE 2023, best of ONE on ONE, ONE on ONE Full Episodes, HALF and HALF 2023

Id: hrcA-RNpuRE

Length: 87min 41sec (5261 seconds)

Published: Tue Aug 22 2023