Fun With Your Narcissist Part 2! Living A Life That Makes Them Ill

hey you to pay subscribers thanks for tuning in by far the most popular and most controversial video on my channel is fun with your narcissus how to beat them at their own game and enjoy it ever since I posted it it has consistently remained in the number one spot it has also consistently garnered the most flack out of all of my videos people really take issue with the premise and I also believe the title and I also believe a lot of folks are commenting on that video without listening to it first so they're just responding to the title now I will take responsibility and say that I don't believe I made it clear enough that those techniques are for situations you can't get out of and for narcissists who operate on the lower end of the spectrum so there's lower level narcissists and there's malignant narcissists I would never recommend anything trying anything with a malignant mark I would always recommend getting away from them if you can but these are for those people who tend to be more irritating and aggravating than draining and detrimental but I digress when I go back and listen to the video the examples I gave were for the long term those situations that aren't easy to get away from situations like work and it looks based on the comments like most people got it like most people understood what I was trying to say but a lot of people didn't so again and for the record that video as well as this one are for those situations you can't get out of quickly living situations working situations social situations where no contact is either not an option or it's not a readily available option it's like number 10 on a list of 10 things and it's not because you don't want to go no contact it's really literally because you can't the next disclaimer is to know your narcissists I say it in the other video that the techniques are only to be considered for lower level narcissus one of the major critiques that I got from people is that you can't know what level of narcissus is actually on and doing anything to screw with them put you in danger fair enough so my recommendation is to consider your whole situation and proceed with caution however I am going to push back a little bit and say that if there's someone in your life who has the potential to be that dangerous just for throwing off the relationship dynamic your issues are bigger than that video or this one because you're basically saying if I don't allow them to monopolize the conversation I'm putting my life in danger if I take notes in their presence in order to keep up with the whirlwind of confusion I'm putting my life in danger if I'm not a good audience member and I don't hit cartwheels and backflips when they are once again bragging about their lives I'm putting my life in danger really think about that so anyway guys here's a follow-up to that channel favorite fun with your narcissist instead of saying beating them at their own game and enjoying it this time we'll say living a life that makes them ill these techniques are a little less direct and have more to do with you than them maybe people will consider these nicer than the other video techniques which actually weren't that mean but that's just my opinion but these are all about you and about what you do in spite of them really so let's jump right in fun with your narcissist part two number one be happy every opportunity you get let the narcissist see you smiling and happy joyful glowing radiant if something is funny laugh if the setting is appropriate laugh loud and hard laughter coming from other rooms or other areas of the house or a very nice touch it's a narcissist shows up to investigate the laughter invite them to join in chances are they will dig their toenails into the floor just to keep from laughing with you because you know you're not allowed to be witty you're not allowed to have a sense of humor that's what important people have and they're the most important people in the relationship so they'll grit their teeth and they might even call what you're laughing at stupid take this as a sign that it's working the key here though is that the laughter has to be genuine it really has to come from the heart don't force it or put it on really it's about not stifling it and more you know because you know the narcissist thinks that's stupid or you know ridiculous or whatever but from now on if you find something humorous and entertaining laugh at it because you deserve to laugh but make sure that you let it come from the heart and that you let it flow freely the narcissists above all wants to see you unhappy and kind of defeated so laugh when things are funny even if you think the narcissist will belittle you for it and if you think they can handle it slide in a oh come on puddin tops life got you down cheer up and they'll probably frown up more and if they do they'll probably make you laugh even harder because is making me laugh right now number two pursue an old hobby bonus points if this is a hobby the narcissist in your life has frowned upon in the past or shamed you for pursuing is there something that you put down or put away or stop doing because of how they made you feel about it and again I'm not talking just about romantic partners is there a family member or a sibling or even a friend who made you feel foolish for a particular hobby well if it's still within your reach and will comfortably fit back into your life I say pick it up again pick it up again and enjoy it if your hobby produces something like a painting or figurines or wood works or something some type of art I consider storing them somewhere else if you can if you happen to live with your narcissist the reason I say this is because narcs can be very very Petty and they can arrange accidents to try and sabotage whatever it is that you love to do now if you really want to have fun with your narcissist leave whatever your hobby is you know the products of that hobby leave them at home and allow these little accidents to occur and when they do and the narcissist is looking at you for your reactions say something like I guess the universe wanted that one back and move right along with your day it will completely short-circuit them number three improve yourself so very similar to pursuing old hobbies start to work on yourself again go back to school pick a night class learn a second language get better at you if your job or company offers some type of training program that you're eligible for apply for it and complete it start reading books again if you put that down if it's within your budget get some new clothes and some new shoes don't break the bank just freshen up a bit there always some old items but don't throw away items just to be hurtful towards the narcissist things like gifts the goal is not to be mean the goal is to illustrate the disease and the dysfunction and really the ridiculousness of the relationship dynamic because think about it normal people either have neutral or positive feelings towards people in their lives bettering themselves if you're lucky they're very encouraging and supportive the reason I say some normal people feel neutral about it is because their friends and family are always bettering themselves in some way so for them it's nothing new but for narcissists anything that changes you from what you used to be or from how they need you to be in their pretend world will be very upsetting to them it feels like a total loss of control so the fun in employing these techniques is in showing them and showing yourself how easy it is to bring their narcissistic colors to the surface it's so predictable that is actually funny it's kind of sad but it's also kind of funny the final tip could really be the first one or it could be the only one and that tip is to bounce back if you've had a long-term exposure to a narcissist chances are you've been really really worn down over time you're tired you're exhausted you may be feeling like you'd love to try these things but you just don't have the energy anymore so my first tip is to check with your doctor to make sure you haven't crossed over into clinical depression and also research the symptoms of PTSD which are very very similar to what survivors of long-term exposure to narcissistic abuse can experience but get that professional help if you need it so you can start to replenish your internal reservoirs for the fight the assumption is that you're in a situation you can't get out of easily so rather than just getting vacuumed over every day get your head back in the game if you can't free yourself you can work on neutralizing the threat you want to become unfun to the narcissist and set their wheel spinning trying to keep up with the newer and better versions of you now I want you all to be prepared because when you start being happy and the narcissist presence they might try to find new ways to make you frown or to make you sad remain aware and recognize that you actually have someone in your life that hates to see you happy it's kind of pathetic this ability to stand outside of the situation will help keep you calm and make their attempts to bring you down comical and that's the goal the goal is for you to be able to be in the moment and be like wow you're really actually trying to make me sad just because I'm happy right now you are so pathetic and hopefully that revelation will get a chuckle out of you because it's funny it's funny and it's sad when you take up that old or new hobby the narcissists will suddenly have a major need that requires all of your attention stay calm and just witness it like fireworks or like the Sun setting on the edge of a beautiful mountain or an ugly Mountain observe this person and their little attempts at sabotage and just speak to yourself and Steve Irwin's voice is necessary saying something like blimey this one's deep with the crazy something like that if you love to be able to recognize a child that's in front of you and turn and walk away if you can as you start to make those self improvements expect a lot of commentary from the peanut gallery you can use their critiques and possibly even their ridicule as feedback that your improvements are working and noticeable if they've gone quiet you're not working hard enough my friends finally as you start to heal and bounce back from their abuse expect them to ramp up their efforts to put you back in the emotional state you were in come up with several strategies beforehand so when you see it happening you know what to do so recognize that their attacks are not real but rather displays of their gross dysfunction kind of like a psychotic monkey in a zoo alright you guys I hope you've enjoyed the second edition of fun with your narcissist as always no contact is the best option it's just not always the most available options you've got to have some tools in your toolkit when dealing with these people otherwise you're just a sitting duck with a psychotic monkey get away if you can but if you can't fight back and have a little bit of fun while you do it I hope you're all having a great weekend take care and as always I grant you the permission to exist bye-bye

Channel: Permission To Exist

Views: 147,209

Rating: 4.9284649 out of 5

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Id: hFXQGpGxOV0

Length: 11min 29sec (689 seconds)

Published: Sat Jul 15 2017