- [Mel] A Mel Robbins exclusive, the deadly cost of botched surgeries. - I felt like I delivered
her to the devil. - [Mel] Today on Mel. I'm Mel Robbins and I'm a life
coach who has helped millions of people get the life they deserve. It's about small steps
and big breakthroughs, I believe in you. - [Crowd] Five, four, three
- And together. Two, one. - [Mel] Yes, we got this. (crowd cheering) (upbeat music) - Hi everybody, how are you? Hello Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Hi, I'm Mel Robbins and
today's show is a warning for anyone who has become
consumed with their looks and is thinking plastic
surgery could be the answer. The woman you're about to
meet went through extreme and dangerous procedures hoping to achieve their perception of beauty. I have to warn you some of what you will see is graphic and disturbing. And due to the nature of the images, we caution that today's show is not suitable for young children. From face tuning filters
to Kardashian curves, we're constantly bombarded with celebrity and social media images that
have shaped our idea of beauty. And the result, millions
of women traveling abroad to third world countries for
inexpensive cosmetic procedures in order to obtain the ideal body. It's a trend called
plastic surgery tourism and it's become a global
multi-billion dollar industry. By traveling abroad you can save 40 to 80% of the cost for plastic surgery, depending upon the
procedure in the country. From breast lifts and liposuction, to tummy tucks and rhinoplasty, countries like Colombia
and the Dominican Republic are luring women with low cost procedures and marketing ploys. But while the initial
procedure may be cheap, the cost is high. Every year, thousands of
women return from abroad, suffering from complications that leave them permanently disfigured, and in extreme cases have even died. 37 year old Lyndsay traveled abroad in search of the dream body, but woke up to a living nightmare. (plane engine roaring) - In May I went to Columbia
to get plastic surgery because I didn't feel
very good about myself. My dream outcome was to come home feeling good in a bathing suit. I chose a plastic surgeon
that two of my friends went to and recommended. They had great results, I wasn't as lucky. My body, was butchered. After all the complications,
I feel like a monster. I was sliced armpit to armpit, hip to hip and have scars everywhere. When I look at my body
now, I see open wounds, gashes and holes that I'll
never be able to repair. My self esteem is shot. I went there to feel better and came home feeling like a monster. Now I shut myself in the house 'cause I'm embarrassed to go out. I don't feel like myself
anymore, a part of me was lost. And I don't know what
to do to regain that. I thought I'd be living
my dream right now. Feeling good in anything I wore. And now I wake up and have to figure out what to wear to hide what
I see as imperfections, which are now deformities. I'm not sure I'll ever be
the same person I was again. Thank you. - [Mel] This just
happened five months ago. - Yes, it did. - And why go to Columbia, for the surgery? - I went to Columbia to have surgery by a doctor known as
the Surgeon of Barbies. - [Mel] The surgeon of Barbies? - The Surgeon of Barbies is his nickname in medical journals and almost everything I've read about him. I would later call him a butcher. - And how did you find
the Surgeon of Barbies? - I had two friends who had gone and had amazing results with this doctor. I had done a ton of
research with with him. I've been to talking
to him on social media and WhatsApp for over two years. He has over 400,000 Instagram followers. He posts live surgeries daily,
before and after pictures, he seems extremely legitimate. - Did you have a face to
face consultation with him? - I did not, my initial
consultation was via WhatsApp where he spoke perfect English to me, assured me that he could
have me in a bathing suit by my 38th birthday running
around and happy and carefree. - So was it a video chat,
over WhatsApp, or texting? - Texting and some voice. - And how much did he quote you in terms of the cost of the surgery? What we're going to have done? - I was going to have a
revision of a tummy tuck and a butt lift and the total
cost should have been $10,000. - And what do these procedures
cost in the United States? - Anywhere from 20 to 35,000. - Wow, so two to three times
more in the United States. - Yes. - And is that also one of
the reasons why you wanted to go to Colombia because
it was less expensive. - Yes, definitely,
definitely cost was a factor. But seeing the man's work
live in front of me every day, I thought, hey, this
can't be a bad decision. - What happened when you got there? - Much to my surprise, when
I arrived at the office, nobody spoke English and I had
to supply my own translator. - You had to supply your own translator? - Yeah, I had hired a
driver and he spoke English. So he was my translator. - Did you start to feel concerned? - I wouldn't say I was concerned. I knew going to another country, there would be a language barrier. I always knew that. But everything seemed legitimate. I mean, there was when I showed up, there were 45 women waiting for a consult. - So now let's go to
the day of the surgery. What do you remember? - I show up very scared and
nervous but also excited, thinking I'm going to come
out with my dream body. I am not dressed laying
on the table being washed with Betadine and they bring in some additional forms for me to sign. - In English? - Not in English. - And what were the forms? - For what I found out
later, for other surgeries. - So how many procedures
did they end up doing? - Just the three. - Wait, I thought you
went down there for two? - I went for two and then
when he saw me at the consult, he told me, he saw my boobs and he said, they're horrible, they need to be done. And I trusted him, he was
the medical professional. - So you didn't go down there to have any kind of breast surgery? - None at all. - Was he gonna charge you
more or was it an included? - Nope, Same price. - Same price? - Same exact price. - Okay, so how long was the surgery? - It should have been three hours, it was a five hour surgery. I woke up feeling extremely
nauseous in a ton of pain. I asked one of the nurses
to take me to the bathroom. She dropped me. I was then put in an ambulance
and sent back to my hotel, where I would wait three to
four hours for a person to come and install an IV for pain management. - Did they have somebody
attending to your care 24 hours? - For up to 48 hours they provide a nurse, I then had to pay, I learned I then had to pay for the nurse afterwards on my own. And I kept her for the whole entire time. - So this was a lot more than $10,000? - Oh yes. - So when did you realize that things had gone terribly wrong? - Say the very next day when
I woke up, I saw black spot. I contacted him, I contacted
people within his office and everyone told me that's
fine, it's just blood. I knew that it was not
blood, it was black. - Did you go back to the
office for a post op? - Yes, I did. I went for the second day
forward until the day I left, I went to the office for
all the post op procedures. The odd thing was I didn't see the doctor for at least five days after surgery. - And you even saved phone records. Let's take a listen. - [Doctor] Listen to
me, is not easy for me to have a patient like you. - [Lyndsay] Think it's not easy for you? Imagine how I feel doctor. I'm in a country by myself,
I'm scared to death. I have asked multiple times for help. I've asked multiple times for someone to tell me what's going on. - [Doctor] You are breathing normal. You are not in danger. You are just getting a little infection. - Hearing his voice what's coming up? - I'm angry, I'm sad but
mostly I'm scared of him. He would come to my room late,
try to get into the hotel. Security had to remove him multiple times. He would try to take me alone, places I later found out that he, that there are cases against him. (crowd mutters) - Allegations? - Allegations yeah, cases. - So the pictures of your
body are really disturbing. I mean, you can hear the audience gasping that's why we told you at
home that this is not a show for you to watch with young kids. I wanna focus on this one. This is a photo where you
had to have a vacuum pump put inside your rotting breast tissue. - Yes, so once I got back to, before I left to come
back to the United States, finally my sister spoke to him, I found out it was necrosis,
which was dead tissue. They removed everything
down to my milk docks. To be honest, at that point,
all I wanted was to be home, I needed to see a doctor here. I needed actual help. And I needed him to sign a
medical release for me to leave. I get home and I go right to wound care. So what you saw in that picture was what I've been dealing with since. I was put on a wound vac. It was in both of my
breasts, in order to suck out as much of the fluid as they
could, for them to start... - [Mel] And how long did
you have to wear the vacuum? - Almost three months. - I mean, I still cannot believe this happened just five months ago. - Yeah, I mean, I've
had two surgeries since because I had an E. coli infection in my breast and my stomach. So everything that they
had done in the stomach has been undone because it had to be open for the infection to be washed out. Because at that point I could have died. - How has this desire
to change your outside in order to fix the inside
feelings impacted you? - It's horrible because
I was chasing a dream that, you know, that you can't accomplish. If you're not good on the inside, it doesn't matter what
you physically look like whether you look great
or you don't look great, you're never gonna heal
and until I can heal that part of myself, that
doesn't like who I am, some days when I look in the mirror, I'm never going to feel whole. (applauding) - Well, that's that all the research says. that, a lot of psychologists
say that plastic surgery can make you feel more attractive, but it's not clear at all as to whether or not it actually makes you feel happy. I personally feel that just what you said, it's about the inside work, that there's no doctor no procedure. There's nothing that
you do on the outside, that fixes the things that
need to happen on the inside. When we come back, your
perception to achieve the perfect body stems
from something deeper, we're gonna find out what, and we're also gonna be joined by a friend of yours. That's next. (applauding) (soft music) Next, when did you first start feeling that you weren't complete? - I was teased when I was younger for how I looked or for my weight. And you know if you hear something enough, I think you start to believe it. - [Mel] And later her daughter
paid the ultimate price for her plastic surgery obsession. - She goes I'm sorry,
but you better hang on to something because I
have bad news for you. And when she told me that
I just fell to the ground. - [Lyndsay] Something is wrong with me. I feel it and nobody is
communicating with me. But I need to understand
what's going on with me doctor. I'm very scared. - That's Lyndsay pleading with her doctor, just five months ago after a botched plastic surgery in Colombia. We're talking about
dangerous plastic surgery and the extreme lengths that women go to to be happy with their looks. Lyndsay's best friend
Christina is also here, and she flew to Colombia to support her. So Lyndsay, you had
already had a tummy tuck and you did not like the results and that surgery was done here in the US. - Yes, it was. - What was going on in your life that made you want to fly down to Colombia in order to change the
appearance of your stomach? - I had just gotten out of
a three year relationship with someone who was very verbally abusive when it came to how I looked. Anytime we had any issue
in our relationship, they would attack my scars,
my physical appearance or my need and want to look better. So once that ended, I think I did it to try to make myself feel whole. - What was the emotional
outcome that you wanted? - Emotionally, I just wanted to feel good. I wanted to feel complete. To be honest, I really
wanted to feel complete. - When did you first start feeling that you weren't complete? - I probably felt like
that most of my life. I was teased when I was younger for how I looked or for my weight. And you know if you hear something enough, I think you start to believe it. And if you don't break
that cycle yourself, then it becomes your day to day life. - Christina, when you first arrived in Colombia, can you
describe for us what you saw? - Lyndsay was in a lot of pain. She was just dealing with it every single day and to see your friend
in that amount of pain is really upsetting. - Now, it's been a little over five months since this happened to you, and what are your doctors
saying now about your prognosis? - They are telling me that in
order to alleviate the pain in my stomach because I constantly feel like someone who's ripping me apart, I would need another surgery. Also, eventually, the implants
will have to come out. But in order to take them out, I need to wait for the
holes in my breast to heal. And I still have, of the five open wounds, I only have one left but it's still about a good three inch gap,
that needs to close, so they're telling me another few months, or I can do a skin graft,
but if I do a skin graft, I have no chance of my
nipple regenerating. So it's been a difficult, you know, it's a difficult road waiting to heal. 'Cause the pain that I feel every day like still the physical pain is immense. - Well, you're still
in the middle of this? - Yes. - And I don't think
you're gonna have any kind of emotional closure until you get past the part where your body actually heals. And so you've gotta have
some patience for yourself. And you know, the other
complication is that all of these are allegations and we did
reach out to the doctor and he didn't get back to
us in time for the taping. If he does respond, we'll be sure to add it on the
melrobbinsshow.com website. What is it that you want to say, to anyone who may be watching,
that is looking in a mirror and not liking what they see? Because that's the genesis of this. That's the deeper issue. - You're enough. Everything you are no matter what you see or don't see, you are enough. (applauding) I'm so blessed because I have
all these people who love and support me and all of these
wonderful things I can do. And I don't want this to
be my defining moment. (applauding) - I don't either. You know the other thing
I wanna say to you, and this is something
that you can hold on to, is that, if you look back, there were major red flags
that I know that you saw. Make sure from this day forward, the second that you ever see
another one that you listen. Because you knew, and that's the life changing lesson for you. I'm really proud of you for being here, and for sharing your story
and for speaking out. And I want to hear back from you in terms of how you're doing,
- Definitely. And Lyndsay was lucky
to escape with her life. When we come back, a mother's anguish over her daughter's mommy
makeover that killed her. We'll be right back. (soft music) - [Mel] Next. - We in pool Sacana (mumbles)
they tell me talk tomorrow. - I waited for hours, I was pacing back and forth for hours, hours, hours, and she goes I'm sorry,
but you better hang on to something because I
have bad news for you. And when she told me that
I just fell to the ground. (upbeat music) (applause) - Welcome back, we're talking about dangerous plastic surgery
and the extreme lengths women go to to be happy with their looks. Alexandra Medina went to a plastic surgeon in the Dominican Republic
for a mommy makeover, but she never returned home. She died from complications
just four months ago. And now her mother is struggling to come to terms with her death. - We in pool Sacana (mumbles)
they tell me talk tomorrow. - My daughter Alexandra
was only 33 years old when she died on an operating table. And I think the doctors are to blame. She was beautiful, kind, a good mom, a loving wife, a loving daughter
and the light of my life. She wanted a body that
society deemed perfect. So she went to the Dominican
Republic for a mommy makeover. And now she's gone. I want justice. She didn't deserve to die like this, and it's torn my whole world apart. It's the hardest thing to
wake up to every morning, knowing that she's not here
and I'll never see her again. I hate my life and no one should ever feel what I'm feeling right now. No one, no parent. I will find justice if
it's the last thing I do. - Thank you. - I can't even imagine
what you're going through. Especially since this is so recent. And your daughter went to
the Dominican Republic, because she wanted to have a body that society deemed perfect,
that's what you said? - Yes. - What do you mean by that? - She had really low self esteem and I don't understand why
because she was gorgeous. Men would look at her and say, wow, you're beautiful, you know. So I don't understand why
she wanted to do this. - And I know she talked
to doctors in the US, but they said something about her BMI. Actually, she was going to go
to the surgery in Columbia. But, they told her her BMI was too high. So then she went online on Facebook, and she found a group,
plastic surgery groups, - [Mel] Okay. - There's a bunch of them on Facebook. And she found a woman there and this woman told her that this doctor will accept you, with your high BMI, he doesn't care and then she goes, look, mommy, this guy's the diamond in the rough. You know, I mean, look, look at these pictures, look at his surgeries
before and after pictures. You know? I mean, these groups what they, I feel like these women do
is pimp out their doctors, they try to, you know,
make them look like, you know this like a god, like they could do anything to the, you know their bodies, but it wasn't at all like that. - And I understand when she
got to the Dominican Republic, she tried to call the surgery off. - Yes, she called me and she goes, mommy, I want my money back
because this lady told me this doctor has a death and I just, and I begged her and I said, please Alexandra Come
back, come back home. I told you not to go
there in the first place. I begged her, just come back. And she's like you know,
don't worry, whatever. And then she calls me
back 15 minutes later, and she goes, oh no, it was a mistake she thought I was talking
about another doctor. I said no. I'm sorry. - It's okay. - It's just that I'm,
you know, remembering how I waited and waited
and this woman told me she was gonna be in
good hands and she lied. She says, don't worry,
you know, we were in touch through WhatsApp the whole time, you know. - You and this other lady? - Yes, the lady that Alexandra contacted, her caregiver, that's what
they're called, caregivers. That she had a recovery
house, which is illegal, by the way, because I found out later. But anyway, the other red flag was that, they rolled her in at 8:30 at night. Who operates at 8:30 at night unless it's a matter of life and death? It doesn't make sense, you know? And she went in and
then I waited for hours, I was pacing back and
forth, hours, hours hours, the lady told me that it took four hours, but it took longer than that. I didn't hear anything,
anything from anybody. - And when did you finally
learn what had happened? - I had to call the Dominican
Republic Police Department. And I gave information to the sergeant who I got in touch with. It was a lady Sergeant and she goes, okay, I'm gonna find out for you. Minutes later, she texts
me back and she goes, I'm sorry, but you better
hang on to something, hang on to God, because
I have bad news for you. And when she told me that
I just fell to the ground. (crying) She told me that my daughter died. I couldn't believe it. Now my baby's dead. They killed my daughter. I had a bad feeling from the beginning. And I told her not to go,
but she wanted to go anyway. - I know you said you
blame yourself but why? - Because when my daughter
got to the Dominican Republic, she didn't have WiFi, you know? - And she said, mommy, can
you call this lady for me? And tell her that I'm here. And I felt like I delivered
her to the devil himself. That's how I felt because (crying) if I would have never
told her that my daughter, maybe she would have turned around or something and went back home. (crying) But I want justice for my daughter. I went over there and
I got the doctor who, the "gynecologist" who
operated on her arrested. (applauding) - Wow. - I got him arrested. Meanwhile all these other
people that were involved in her death are still walking free. It's nothing because the
justice system over there isn't the same as ours here. It's really hard, you know. - When we come back the
premonition Alexandra had before leaving for the Dominican Republic and the US doctor fighting
plastic surgery tourism head on. That's next. (soft music) - [Mel] Next. - It was really hard to watch that. It makes me embarrassed about my field, because this is not what it's for. - The last chance to say
I love you or a last laugh or a last hug was taken
from me by those people. - [Mel] And later, she's had a
record 40 cosmetic procedures and she's not even 30. I also understand you
had six ribs removed. - I did. - [Mel] Why? (soft music) (clapping) - Welcome back, Connie's
daughter Alexandra went to the Dominican Republic
for a mommy makeover and died on the operating
table four months ago. Connie's oldest and now
only daughter Maxine, joins us as well as
Atlanta board-certified plastic surgeon Dr. Myla Bennett. Alexandra clearly knew that
there were some red flags because there was a
premonition that she had before she left, what was it? She said, mommy, if something happens to me, please tell Maxine that I'm
sorry, and that I love her, because they weren't
talking for six years. They had stopped talking for six years. And I told her nothing's
gonna happen baby. She kind of felt something you know. - Maxine, how are you feeling? - Overwhelmed, enraged,
tired, sad, grieving. The last chance to say I love you or, a last laugh or a last hug was taken from me by those people,
they took it from me. And I feel like it's just all tied into this crazy society and where we're meant to look like the Kardashians or Black
Chyna or Nicki Minaj, and these are impossible beauty
standards and I feel like if it wasn't for these things constantly being put out there for
everyone to like, you know, try to achieve my sister wouldn't have even bothered because I mean, everybody, even I was jealous of my sister. I'm not even gonna lie. I always admired her beauty, her strength. She was so strong and so smart and witty and passionate. Like she was just a light
in a room, you know? - Well, I wanna go to you, Dr. Myla, because there's something bigger going on. When we hear the words
plastic surgery tourism, and you hear about these websites. Can you talk to me a little bit about the larger organization
that's luring women in. - Yes, so first I want
to offer my condolences. It was really hard to watch that. - Thank you. - It makes me embarrassed about my field because this is not what it's for. You couldn't have stopped
it, because those groups they, the SX groups or the surgery groups, they lure women in and
the women have no clue that they're being
manipulated and brainwashed. - I'm covering that,
I'm exposing them now. - That's right, and
there's the administrators of the groups are behind the scenes like puppeteers, manipulating
everything that the women see. Our phones are in our hand
for the majority of the day, and they're watching
before and after pictures and people at their consultations
and right before surgery, selfies with their gown
on in the pre-op area. - [Connie] Yes. - And then, like it's just constantly and it's tens of thousands of
women inside of these groups. And so it creates an
obsession within the person who's looking at it and
they don't even realize it. So when they start to see the
red flags when they get there, they're so obsessed with the
outcome that they've been fed that they will do anything to make sure that it it goes through. - Well, I wanted to do
this show because recently, the New York Times called
this entire thing out. It's a social media
phenomenon, plastic surgery, Instadram dolls, and in
particular, these SX pages. And so Dr. Myla, why don't
you talk a little bit about the fact that there are so many people looking to do medical procedures outside of the United
States because of cost. - So if you're in these groups, and then also they normalize getting six surgeries at
one time, which is absurd. - Yes - You know, they normalize it. So these women will go and
get these literal overhauls. And if you go and do a
consult in the United States for all the stuff that they want that, that might cost 40 or $50,000. So then even though you may say, well, I'm just gonna get surgery
in the United States so I can be safe when you go and get that, that estimate for $50,000,
and somebody tells you they got it all in the
Dominican Republic or Colombia or wherever, for 8000,
including a 10-day stay in the recovery house,
you're gonna be like, well all these girls were
fine, so I'll probably be fine. - These are major surgeries. - [Myla] Yes. - And what are the complications
that women are facing that lead to death and that
lead to the deformities that we heard about Lyndsay's case? So excessive blood loss is
one, fat embolism is a big one. So a lot of the women
get Brazilian Butt Lifts or the fat transfer to the buttock area, and there's large vessels
in the buttock area. And if the fat is
transferred inadvertently into one of those vessels,
it essentially goes up to your lungs and suffocates you. - That's right. - If somebody is right
now, 'cause I'm sure that there is somebody
watching and it may be you, that is dissatisfied with how they look, and they're in one of these
groups or thinking about going overseas to get a surgery. What is it that you want to say doctor? - I'd say get out of the groups. When I do consults in my office I ask them if they're in those
groups, the groups are bad. - Yes.
- Yes, thank you. (applauding) It changes the way you make decisions, it changes the way you perceive yourself. So I think first remove
yourself from the group. The doctor should be a board-certified plastic surgeon not cosmetic surgeon. - So big difference between
plastic and cosmetic surgeon? - Yes. - But how do you know
'cause if you're dealing with other countries, how do you know if the license is legit, if it's been bought, if it's fake? - You don't. That's the problem, if you can't elucidate these things because they have, everything's different. The rules are different,
there's a language barrier. There's so many things. You can't like with certainty
figure any of that stuff out. That's the problem. That's why it's just best not to do that. - So that's what I think, don't do it. Don't do it. (applauding) When we come back, a different extreme. A woman who has had 40 cosmetic procedures and she's only 28 years old. We'll be right back. (upbeat music) (clapping) - [Mel] Next. - I was a 32B and then when I woke up I was a 32DD and I'm now a 28L. - A 28L? I also understand you
had six ribs removed? - I did. - Why? (upbeat music) (clapping) - Welcome back, my next
guest got her first surgery when she was 18 years
old and 10 years later, she's had a record 40 procedures,
spending over $200,000. Let me list this off stuff
some of the procedures. Two breast augmentations,
two Brazilian Butt Lifts, butt implants, cheek implants,
facial reconstruction work including three rhinoplasties,
jaw reshaping, brow lift and the most shocking one
to me is six ribs removed. And so Chrissy, I wanna
start off by asking you probably the question, most
of us are thinking, why? - Well, when I was younger
I was I was bullied a lot. I was flat chested,
and all the other women in my family were full chested
and I always wanted that. So around the age of 18 I decided to have my first breast augmentation. And beforehand, I was a 32B. And then when I woke up, I was a 32DD, and then since then I've had a second breast augmentation
and I'm now a 28L. - A 28L? Can you talk to me about the obsession with getting these surgeries
and with the way that you look. - So I sort of, I've have
always viewed my body as sort of a canvas. And I feel like I, you know,
I have an image in mind, and I'm sort of working towards that. - What was that image? - Well, so I've always been
very sexual and very open. And so my... - What does that mean? - Meaning that I'm a very
sexually open person, I have this image in mind where I want to further sexualize my body. I want that sort of Jessica
Rabbit extreme hourglass shape. After I had the first
procedure, I realized, you know, this is a means to an end. And if I research it, and
I do everything right, that I can get there, that it can help me reach my goals. - I also understand you
had six ribs removed. - I did. - Why? - So I work out all the time. And I've had liposuction and there wasn't really anything else that could be done. I of course had trained all of that, and I wasn't getting the
result that I wanted. I went to a friend who had had six ribs removed as well in the United States, and she informed me of a
surgeon who I then researched and found out that he does it. He explains it very well. And he is also very, very cautious about how he does it. He gets in and he feels
like he can't get more than two or four, then
that's what he does. And he makes sure that
you know that beforehand. - So Dr. Myla, you're
sitting here listening, what is the first thing
that you wanna say? 'Cause I'm like struggling with, there's so many things that
concern me about the way that you're talking about
achieving a certain goal, but I want to hear from
your professional opinion what's coming up for you. - It makes me sad for her that because of what happened to her being bullied when she was younger. She thinks it's like she's trying to get the opposite type of attention. There's nothing wrong with
plastic surgery, obviously, I'm a plastic surgeon but
perhaps you could have gotten the helps you need psychologically
from the scar she endured from what happened to her growing up. So then she could have made healthy, safe decision for herself. (applauding) I feel like people failed her. - Do you feel that way? - No.
- She doesn't feel like that. I have a psychologist that I
see, I have a psychiatrist. - And what do they say? - They told me that initially,
when I first started out all this that I potentially
had body dysmorphia. - Potentially? - Potentially, and I have
to I have to actually go to my psychologist and let
her know what I'm having done. And she has to let me know
whether or not that's like... - What if your psychologist said no? - I wouldn't do it. - But your psychologist said
six ribs removed is okay. - When I explained it to her, yes. If I had gone to her and said, you know I have a small waist already. And I want to have six ribs removed, because I think my waist is too
big, she would have said no. And I would have said,
okay, then I won't do it. Because I don't want to do something, that I don't wanna to hurt myself. - What are the red flags for you Dr. Myla, like when is enough
enough, with a patient? - There's no cut and dry answer for that. This talk that you're having with her is the type of talk that
I have with every consult. I do all my own consults myself so that I can just
figure out the intention, the endgame and see if I think
that there's some sort of psychological pathology
going on that needs to be dealt with prior to surgery. Some women I'll send to a therapist and they come back and we move forward. Some women I just say no, if
I'm uncomfortable with it, if it's something that's gonna make me not be able to look myself in the mirror, I just will say no. (applauding) - How do you not like, 'cause to me this feels, this is an obsession. - Yes. - Would you agree? - I would. - Does that scare you? - No, 'cause I know when to stop. - Does anyone in your
family worry about you? - Oh, yeah, my parents of course. - Do you talk to them about this? - Yeah, I do. - I mean, you're an adult. So that's the thing about being a parent is that you can be worried, but you can't control
what your kid is doing. And it's pretty clear that you
have what you have in mind. - Right. - You were going to figure
out how to get it done. And you're not going to stop until you do. - Yep. - When we come back, how
is social media to blame for extreme plastic surgery? Find out the connection when we come back. We'll be right back. (upbeat music) (clapping) Welcome back. We're talking about
dangerous plastic surgery and the extreme lengths women go to to be happy with their looks. Now I personally worry about
how obsession with perfection has trickled down to
our girls, eight, nine, 10 11 years old who are using filters all day on social media. In fact, one in three
Facial Plastic Surgeons say they've seen an increase
in the request in procedures due to people being more self conscious of their looks because of social media. That's what has me concerned. So I've brought in clinical
psychologist, Dr. Ramani, she's here, along with board-certified plastic surgeon, Dr. Myla Bennet. So Dr. Ramani, this
whole topic overwhelms me as a woman, as a mother. And why is it that we are
taking so many risks for beauty, and can we talk about
the connection between what's happening on social media and our obsession with perfection? - You know, over the years, even before social media was a thing, 90% of women would express some level of dissatisfaction with their appearance. You know, I don't know what it is about the socialization of women and how we look and how much self worth
we get from our parents, but that's now on steroids. It's completely out of control. And you gotta remember what young women are doing is they're
comparing, forget young women, all women are comparing
themselves to things that aren't even human beings
anymore, they're edited. It's like comparing
yourself to a painting, and saying, I wanna look like
something that's not real. And so whether it's filters,
whether it's edited images, and it used to be you
might compare yourself to the lady next door,
- Right. Now you're comparing
yourself to the whole world. Nobody can win at that game. And maybe as we get older,
we're able to think critically, but an eight year old
is not able to do that. It's not like we teach this in school. - As a mom, I'm constantly concerned about my own daughters and
young women in particular, and the impact that this
pressure of the perfect photo and filters has on the
developing brain of a young girl. What the hell do you say,
'cause they don't listen to half of what we say anyway. How do you start to implant
what I call grenades, so they drop in and they
go off maybe a little later that makes them stop and think? - Well I have two teenage
daughters too, right? So I live with this every day. And I think that number one
is when you're a mother, you have absolute
responsibility to be mindful in everything you do and say. It's on us to not use the filters. It's on us to not look
in the mirror and say, does this make me look fat? (applauding) - Like I also started to think today, am I over complimenting
that their outfit is cute or that they look beautiful,
and that that's now like rewarding the way that I look, - Absolutely. - Versus, okay so give me advice. - 100%. So really, what we don't talk about is we don't talk about
feelings and experiences. How are you feeling today? I'll tell my little one,
little one who's 16. Sweetie, how are you feeling today? It's not like you look great. And I really really steer
clear of the love your outfit. Don't love your outfit, love your hair. It's like how you feeling today. What's today about honey,
what is gonna be about? And it changes the conversation to this is what I'm doing in school
or I have a new radio show, instead of oh, do you think
should I change the color? We're the mothers. We
have to be responsible. We're the gatekeepers.
- I bet I don't even realize how often I'm going, oh, I love that sweater or cute jeans or I love those boots versus awesome. - Yeah what's today about? - Yeah, great advice. - I don't think it's bad
to do it a little bit, because then they'll starve for it. But I think it's important
to infuse, you're so smart. You're so funny, things
that are inside of them. So that we're not just
focused on what's up. (applauding) - Awesome. As always, I love both of you. Thank you for being here. We'll be right back with final thoughts. (applauding) (upbeat music) Welcome back. Well, today we talked about
women who took extreme measures and underwent dangerous and
even deadly plastic surgery in their search to be
happy with their looks. You know, it's easy to judge
people who ignore red flags, risk and even logic in a
desire to be beautiful. But until we address the deeper issue, this is actually only going to get worse. And the deeper issue is
loving yourself as you are. Because there's not a surgery, a procedure or a single filter on Instagram
that can do the deeper work that you need to do in order to learn how to be truly happy with yourself, happy with who you see in the mirror, and happy with the photo that
you post on social media. Which is why I do this
show Monday through Friday, to remind you that you are
perfect exactly as you are. Because there's only one you and there's never gonna be another one. So remember that before you
slap a filter on your face. And finally, in case nobody
else has told you today, let me be the one to tell
you that I believe in you and your ability to change your life. Not your physical
appearance for the better. That's why I'm here. Cheering for you five days
a week and reminding you that whatever you're facing you got this. I'll see you next time. (applauding) (upbeat VFX)
