Fugget about it season 3 04 Confetti Deathblow

greetings you know me as Petey mcdougal Canadian nerd you also know me as Petey Falcone New York dork like other misfits of my ilk I never really felt like I fit in hello this was especially apparent in our old life among the family angels singing in your mouth no thanks I'm lactose intolerant and pastas not good for my gluten sensitivity you know what makes me sensitive jag-offs with no manners it's a fool you Mook hey have some wine I won't tell your folks you need to loosen up Cheech I've seen what alcohol does to people namely you and what are you doing the bride gave birth to a boy this morning we celebrate smoke up KITT it's bad luck if you don't really Elif I know now that we are in Canada I finally feel like I fit in and I'm sure in time the rest of my family will learn to love it here as much as I do [Applause] let me tell you something bout a friend of ours named Jimmy I made the wise guy and the couple with the Gambini a when we found each the boss he threw him from the keep jerking it Jessie relax cookie it's not what you think I'm sure there's a logical ID okay you went to a Catholic school this kind of thing happens all the time Oh God listen to yourself you pricked me spit that out you do not want to swallow it what do you think Cheech we're trying to keep a low profile here so you go and swipe a boat swipe give me some credit I got it at the police auction let's start the bidding at 505 Oh it was a steal Jimmy except I pay for it we live on the prairies what are we gonna sail on seas of wheat there's a lake near here we'll go fishing like the old days except without the dead wiseguys clogging up the water Cheech I'm married I can't just take off whenever I want I was married I took up all the time and how'd that work out for you I'm gonna die alone I gotta clear this kind of stuff with cookie I got a drop remind us sweet talker negotiate terms peace in the Middle East to take less diplomacy hey cook we're going fishing great idea absolutely go fishing get out of here far away from Petey huh never mind justo oh no wait there is something we need to talk about so I think your brother might be gay and if he is I want to make sure neither of you gives him a hard time about it what do you take us for he's a brother I know we bust his balls but we got his back apparently so does jet see Theresa what did I say MA I'm just playing what stop I'm having a hard time with this get over it you want to wind up like mrs. Scavo so she rejected her boy because he was gay died alone Kat's a two-faced you want that ma you want a cat eat in your face cuz I know a guy I don't know what I'm supposed to do you can act like a mom and never buy a cat you're right I can do this I'm gonna be the best damn mother of a gay you ever saw you know he's not right oh god of course he's not cool enough to be gay if he was at least you'd have a personality this is fun what are we bonding now shut up you you I'll be a cookie good cuz I don't know how to tell him he has my support can you help me out I can do better than help you cookie I can refer you to a qualified colleague and no I'm not deflecting your requests because it makes me uncomfortable here in Canada we pride ourselves on our pride by the by how's Jimmy taking this Oh God Jimmy doesn't know anything yet he's gone fishing with Cheech fishing I got no idea what Jimmy will do when he finds out did he mention being angry with me because I've told him I'm an avid fisherman but he loves peds so who knows I'm sorry what just checking for texts from Jimmy no nothing here do you think it would be weird if I just showed up showed up we're at the fishing trip I thought we were talking about Petey oh right I'll get my colleague to come see you or Canada where friends are supposed to tell friends about fishing trips [Music] don't move don't move I said what the hell look at me look at me I am the captain now oh no no no no I don't look at you you look at me look at me look at me look at me look at me look at me look at him look at me look at me don't say look I mean just look at me look at me look at you being off look at me I am giddy this is Johnny we on the spot now understand hey I own this boat pal you want it make me an offer I'll shoot your fat friend and dump him over the side hey Jimmy quiet I'm negotiating here alright so you shoot fatso what's in it for me so are you sure this isn't going to be too intense for you maybe but it's something I need to do well why don't we just ease into it then take it nice and slow what's going on with the hand down there uh foreplay isn't this what you wanted no I need advice about helping my son come out of the closet oh my god I'm so sorry I thought this was a booty call McCool kept talking about it I think he said fishing he's all upset my husband went without him oh it was hard to understand McCool he was so distraught oh this is embarrassing don't worry about it and a little disappointing Oh why well you're gorgeous oh stop so about your son how about this is it this gorgeous oh just curious but uh what would you do to a guy like me Jimmy uh for instance wow that is something so where are these scissors I keep hearing about come into it you guys are not gonna believe this but I think mom might be gay hey this is huge who'da thought mom was a Lebanese can you imagine what it must have been like for her in the old neighborhood carrying the desire that dare not speak its name yeah you weren't big on that back home and they hated people who said stuff like dare not speak its name so what are we gonna do give her the love and acceptance she deserves duh yeah yeah but uh don't come right out and tell her we know a machine might not be ready for that good idea I'm gonna show her I'm behind her 100% since I switched your birth control pills with huh that's why I've been so minty down there is there nothing on this boat but beer and grappa cuz Jimmy says cocaine and boating don't mix this is pointless we need money for a jolly pirate crew you guys ain't - jolly Jolly pirates we did it to survive a brutal civil war we fled to Canada for a better life but now we are being deported we need money for an immigration lawyer fast problem is you cruise too small you need a few more hands on deck what could I possibly find experienced hijackers in Regina Beach you thinking what I'm thinking honestly I don't even know what I'm thinking what I'm thinking ever hear voices Jimmy ma there's a secret living in this house an elephant in the room if you will i NOPD a big gay elephant that elephant needs to know they're loved and supported I couldn't agree more what about Papa elephant will tell Papa elephant when the gay elephant is good and ready and when the time comes that elephant is not going to be alone know that elephant isn't I'm glad we cleared this up it's good to get things out in the open it sure is I feel sorry for families that don't know how to communicate lovers what are you doing this is not some dress-up game ah come on who doesn't want to be a pirate you boys need our help and you know it fine we're desperate and you're Canadians are very helpful rise away your Pirates don't dress like that pirates gotta have a hook quickly where is the Hat now we must put it on ice immediately here it is all right all hands on deck oh sorry teacher I'd come to terms with my choice uh mom yes PD there's this pride rally downtown this afternoon and it'd be an honor to be beside my boy now that the elephant's out of the closet let's paraded through the streets [Music] [Laughter] so what you're not gay and the little Dutch boy wasn't poking his finger in you Dyke how are you doing I told you it was nothing that was not nothing young man spit it out Oh fine but I think it'd be easier if I showed you it becomes back in a dresser what a [Music] the Elven spellcaster mage i don't understand a word you just said I'm a larper what is that Swedish Kaluza no it's live-action role-playing LARP we dress up in costumes oh it's like when you dress up as a french maid or put on a leather suit right now that's good wholesome fun I got no freaking idea what this is problem is you've been picking the wrong targets Getty what you want is an RV then things have packed with a king's ransom that's right what about your uncle's house we need to go to a hospital baby fine he said so many peers he can't feel nothing that's better there's a galleon on the port bow or is it stopping which one's left I used to know this get pirate insurance I said you never know I said but would you listen I'm going to watch TV and I don't care if it drains the battery prepare to be boarded yes scurvy dogs place to visit what sits on the wibblewobble Oh where'd he get those it's standard now an all-american made our beasts God bless thee Anna you that was really close to my eyes so mom what you think I think I'm gonna confetti deathblow you we should be those next so what do we do with this scallywag thank you wanna play go away father the power of Christ compels you lightning bolt lightning bolt see father what did I tell you he's all wrapped up in the occult I'm not possessed I'm a larper that's not a sin but it's an abomination isn't it tell him father oh heavens not at all it's not as though he's gay get outta here you intolerant jagoff I'm still not having this under my roof tell your friend to leave shut seize my apprentice and he's staying I said scram DJ Jazzy wait I don't care what she says we're a team you of course we are we're pirates for chrissake no you're not you're idiots consider yourselves fire ha we just got Jolly Roger you know Jimmy I don't even think them guys was real pirates hey cool ooh Casey and Finnegan what happened to teach his hand fashioned action we got it oh nice I knew you shouldn't have gone fishing without me hop on gentlemen Oh Canada where universal health care even covers stupidity [Music] this just feels stupid now maybe mom's right we're just a bunch of losers and bathrobes tossing paper balls at each other whoa who is that red hair and purple robes where have I seen that color scheme before cluster fee eardrum shatter you cookie the concubine you mean conqueror I just picked a word PD what the heck is a thunder purse I don't know but it just saved your life you little prick thanks mom that was great I thought about what you said and you were right but for God's sake don't let your father know about this he's not gonna like the idea of his son dressing up in costume a vaster it's a sea gremlin get him Jimmy Oh God thank you for knowing what I was I there be the booty I've been craving [Laughter] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music]

Channel: defblazt duboise

Views: 434,763

Rating: 4.351161 out of 5

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Id: Ubnxx_o2sAI

Length: 22min 32sec (1352 seconds)

Published: Sun Oct 08 2017