Final Harem VII Remake (Part 1)

well the Final Fantasy 7 remake is out and you know me the guy who never played the original but hey I know some things like this is a cloud this is an edgy anime white haired boy I've heard some of the music I've seen a gif of Tifa on a channel you wouldn't think that would do that kind of thing now hey but yes I do know in the main game star Cloud Strife and the whole time I was wondering they better answer the question why such a skinny boy can hold such a big sword but instead all I learned is that every single character wants to ride his Buster blade and also his penis he's cut balls he sure does well where else do you think his balls were so the game starts out in the usual square enix fashion with a gorgeously animated cutscene oh no it's the good-looking I can't take it well here we see a girl getting her flowers stomped on before cutting to the pretty boy himself an ex-soldier ie a guy who worked for this company called Shinra who put grain in his eyes and now he's a mercenary hired by an eco-warrior group called avalanche to help them blow up a reactor as Shinra that company sucked the planet dry of its essence to power homes and such and that's no good so this sell of avalanches led by Barret a neckbeard with the machine gun arm followed by these guys you got wedge biggs smalls wide and thirsty he's cut balls now as you make your way through the reactor you sort of notice this group they don't like using their little pea shooters no they want the big sword boy but he ain't cheap oh no he doesn't want money he wants cheddar cheese and also money yes I need that money we're done real joy to look at - I'm watching you okay that's three people on the list ok then so wedge is sort of a loveable goofball character Biggs is literally Charlie Sheen and Jesse will get 12 later Falls Barrett though well he really believes in the cause of blowing up the reactor to send a message to Shinra me you gonna stand there and pretend you can't hear the planet crying out in pain I know you can Brad get help say that if you get help you should have asked for more money so after almost dying we smoothly make our way through the reactor we finally make it to the end goal where Barrett is like hey I need some liability you blow it up so they can technically say you did it fine I guess we set the timer huh that long enough for you when all of a sudden a giant mech comes to attack us but be easily win see I told you but in its last breath it almost blows up the reactor setting off the bomb and ernõ we better get out of here okay that was pretty cool the game thing cuts to these two the head of Shinra and his commander who secretly blow up the reactor without explosion way that's your own equipment why would you do that I wonder so the reactor explodes leaving our group trapped on the ground and we make our way outside to see the destruction the absolute chaos and panic of blowing up something this important to the people although that doesn't bother cloud since all he cares about is that glorious cheddar you can have back yeah you don't know how to use it right you do know what I was right well we make our way through the broken sector hearing the voices of the people oh well I was planning to commit insurance fraud by blowing up my house but this will do but one thing you'll notice is that all these characters are voiced but the game does this thing where it doesn't load up every character so when you walk past them they whisper their words but the other characters are quiet till you run away and come back which I guess is good because otherwise it would be non-stop yelling over each other both of you around speaking of which yes so throughout the game so far cloud has been acting a bit odd as wave another character so much as sneezes he gets these headaches and I guess the road sneezed quite a bit he starts to imagine the place on fire with the man the myth the legend he's like following me if you want some cheddar cheese well I'm trying but the game handicaps me because they want to be cinematic but this also helps a load in the fire textures why by talking about the technical aspect you're not real you're dead yeah I don't know what you're smoking cloud he looks pretty not dead to me Sephiroth then I guess shocking to me you know the guy who's ever played the game goes on an environmental speech and I guess Claire has had enough of that from Barrett ah ha you missed but also remember to recycle now as a newcomer these scenes are kind of weird because he talks about things that are going to happen or they're in the past it's kind of confusing at times I guess what I understand is that cloud somehow Authority killed the tall man while Sephiroth killed his mother at one point okay well it's good they still have pizza in this place hello so this flower girl named Aerith you know the one from the beginning starts tripping balls Falls but then is fine then isn't because Sephiroth uses his stand on her so apparently she thinks we saved them so they are then asked are you okay nevermind alright then keep your secrets I guess since I wasted your time I'll buy a flower then how much well that depends on the customer in your case it's on the house alrighty add another one to the list okay then look I'm involved in things dangerous things I'm sure you are god I love a personality so much I mean no no I'm very impartial to this waifu war we still haven't met the other combatants you shouldn't be out here trying to sell damn I guess midgar's flies really are something but no Aerith grabs our hand allowing us to see the Dementors watch out Ramses you can't say Erica's best girl because the tpho fans will get to you how odd however this commotion brings the Shinra guards who I guess can't see the literal death cloaks and are more interested in our big sword Aerith after stealing our lunch money takes the opportunity to flee well thanks I guess I know she left us to fight the gods all the line well this then leads into a big rush from us escaping the clutches to meet the Avalanche group on the train out of here and here I guess I can go into the combat so you press square to win yay okay but that's pretty much all you need to know oh and you also have a Kingdom Hearts menu sort of thing you know Nomura made the game etcetera etc and if you press X you can open up a command menu which slows down time for then pick which spells or attacks to do next these cost AP points which build up over time or with more attacks and you can get abilities that are unique to each weapon you use you can also swap between party members mid battle which I'll get to later on now cloud himself has a normal mode then a Punisher one you know like a Berserker anyway using this makes you move slower but also allows you to counter enemy attacks and to get the most out of enemies you want to build the stagger meter to do massive damage I'll just burn them either way or occur always new cloud loved fire now outside of this the areas are massive with many winding parts but controlling cloud can be kinda clunky ignoring the clunky sword you can't dodge roll or jump which raises the question of how we anime leaped earlier then there are breakable objects in the field you press square to destroy them but it kind of slows down everything and doesn't feel fluid like if you miss you have to wait for him to put the sword away to use it again then in these areas you will come across these narrow pathways for the games oh down so much and you're wondering hey what's the holdup oh what's that the game is a hundred gigs on the PlayStation 4 and this is a trick to load in the next area can't wait to see you Marlene I mean ok I'll take this over long loading screens any day well okay then I guess I can read what it says aha I see I see hey just gonna cut me off like that okay and I have another little thing with these screens so they tell you some tips and tricks but also they'll go hey this is the Evo final boss of Shinra okay and I'm like wait are we gonna meet him next chapter I guess not yes I know it's meant for people who played the game already I get it so we make our way battling grunts door goes riot shields and the laws of physics to make it back to the Train [Music] giving public security the runaround that's why can I just say after being stuck with so many silent JRPG protagonist I loved cloud not for the reasons you think but how he's still silent for player representation but also is so sassy and charming and strong and charming and hot and blood so we go further into the train careful not to bump into the passengers because you know we brought a large package when Barret seems to have bumped into some Shinra employees did your masters we will not submit to intimidation or violence but work together for peace and prosperity that is how civilized people change the world [Music] at least two really want a promotion huh Jesse then calls us over and somehow hacks the security to give us Lord yes Lord so mid guy is this giant city that's powered by reactors at points around it and it split up like a pizza with each sector housing people so we just blew up one of them all so it's actually floating in the air because the poor people live underground while the rich lives on the plate on top boy do you mean to tell me there's an entire system of people living ok my reaction to this was utter amazement I love worlds that show a huge environment and this dead star looking place was just so cool seriously amazing work square realizing these visuals from the PlayStation 1 because ok I mean PlayStation 1 clout can't hurt me and what a mood okay let's keep going to the Avalanche hideout and when we finally reach it it's also a bar which I guess is great because they can get free booze and we see Barrett's daughter Marlene and also yeah fan favorite ads I mean T fur how sweet when did you get so thoughtful Oh fine another one on the list cloud however remembers his mission goal was a cheddar but it seems like Tifa ain't have that cheese so distracts cloud by offering him a free apartment next door to hers mind you then says oh hey say like this is all I have at the moment but if you do some side quests for me I'll give you the rest teehee okay I mean I'll do anything for the moolah I mean cheese so cloud you dude The Big Sleep but not till that other neighbor rudely interrupts him alright I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind this can't be happening it's just a creepy old man with a tattoo wait no can I have the hot anime dude choking me instead please tight let's get down to business shall we her these water filters won't replace themselves although the next five Jessi put her mind to every home in the hills honestly because most of this place we 300 think Jeff sees what are like what give me a break I'm not a soldier I'm a Salesman so the next day begins a sidequest time this is where the game lets you hang out in one area for a bit talking to as many people as you can doing the side quest and it's also where we find an item shop for all the healing also music because you can't spell JRPG without collectibles wait a minute then a weapon shop to swap out the characters weapons because you know nothing says ff7 like cloud and his ok you know what this actually it looks really phallic we also see yeah I sure hope we never see this character again oh yeah we also meet this kid called Chadli to work for Shinra but now helps us by giving us quest to do yay with a new recipe then we finally meet our landlady mall mom if you ever need a vent anything I'll lend you - loud and clear no charm no wit big sword but no skills I'm doing my best also after Biggs grabs our sword he teaches us about materia these balls made from the marker that are pretty much the magic in this game so you can equip them onto weapons and armor to let your characters use that spell or ability some of these near the end can get quite crazy and also there are many tactics with this but pretty much you want to swap out the spells you need against the boss since enemies have type advantage weaknesses also this means you're not locked into a character using one spell the entire game meaning the skill tree is just a place to increase attack magic stats almost lots for balls you know that sort of thing I will say the assessment area is really good because using it tells you how to defeat most enemies although it's kind of hard remembering what defeated enemies as you would need to use it every time to see the weaknesses and as I skimmed over the button you could just press so then this is where Tifa also joins your party for a bit and unlike Barret who is a long shooting range boy she's the close range punchy Superman she also has this ability where she does this thing Dragonball and allows us a pretty much stagger enemy's quicker I didn't use her much at the start but late-game she was one of my favorites since it felt really fun using her in combat also to regain health clouts it's yeah this is a big do not disturb moment this sucks so Clare returns the tifa's room you know what we should totally celebrate let's dress up and hit the town really I mean why not it'll be fun do you even have fancy clothes not like fancy fancy but I'll figure something out what do you think would suit me huh ah well she's very sporty so uh something sporty I don't think that'd be so different from my usual be sure to pick an outfit that goes okay so are we actually going on a date or we then return to the bar and Barrett calls Tifa to magically go down for the avalanche meeting four before that Tifa asks us another tough question what'll it be and away she goes making um a drink I don't know man are you sure this is okay hmm needs more alcohol anyway teather goes on down well we just sit there amazing gameplay ten out of ten okay fine I guess I'll go and play darts goddammit I'm still no good anyway teeth eventually comes back up not to talk to us but to uh you know it's kind of nice to have a JRPG that isn't about high schoolers but actually adults who can get drunk well T for drinks because she said that the plans ever Lynch wants to do actually hurt people if he couldn't tell and she's not sure if she can handle it however the gang come back up seemingly happy with their next plan which let me see below I yeah here it is blow up another reactor methinks there isn't much planning in this group Farah tells us to take the money and get the heck out of here cuz you know we are a mercenary and they don't want us with the next job Tifa abandons us to sit with the cool kids while My Chemical Romance plays as we exit the load so after we play knife it's burn you it's a hoodlums we go home and say took your sweet time psych right wait so what's your personality again is all you think of her cloud tonight you and me together just Hill Jesse yeesh so I guess in a weirdly paced section of the game which really felt like the low point to me MacLeod is asked by Jesse to get material for the next mission to bomb the reactor but the whole time it was just to flesh out her backstory how she wanted to be an actress Bret is pretending to work in a theater to help her parents while she also does his eco-warrior job and yeah more uncharted walking into houses segment while we also see a sick father before robbing him off a key card to a Shinra base since it works for them and that's where we had to distract the guards while she gets the explosives well here we get another flashback to baby cloud with a not so baby voice I'm gonna be a soldier the best of the best like Sephiroth making a promise to Tifa locking her in as a childhood friend in clouds growing harem so to help Jessie we make our way in fighting Shinra grunts and with some wacky anime hijinks we then have a mini boss and this is where we get summons which are the big crazy god things we can bring into battle whenever the game feels like it I guess because we shouldn't waste them on small grunt and the first one we get is Ifrit eeeh angry firey boy however after winning the battle we are seemingly stuck but let me take you back a bit after jesse gives us some hip thrusts we meet rosh I like you ooh I like him a lot and even though he works for Shinra I guess he bursts in to have a one-on-one duel with cloud you turned the key the engine roars with excitement hungers to be set free are you serious now the one on the list wait a minute so this game it ain't an action JRPG reimagining of the beloved turn-based PlayStation 1 classic it's a harem game I mean okay the persona games a harem games danganronpa a harem games even Bob the Builder festival of fun is a harem game but ff7 the highest rated JRPG of all time was really just a game where people wanted to bang a blonde anime boy so after a cool boss battle heats on out and the other side of avalanche since our group is just a small cell in a big organization helped us escape burn up before this is like a bruise or a mild burn it works and we just get out of here please so we find that wedge that loves them cats bigs I don't know has a nice jaw and Jessie well coming over tomorrow night my roommate should all be out for a while ya know this is seriously a whole character okay's I have someone else waiting for me also it actually it's kinda refreshing to have an anime protagonist who ain't into that sort of thing like it's kind of weird I'm finding so many things this game does really uniquely with these characters but this game is technically a holder than most of the others so I get it okay ff7 is amazing alright so then we head home not before saying Tifa fine I'll stay because you're Yoda Yoda childhood friend promise and so on but in the night all is not as it seems oh no it's the Dementors sucking our souls I think Oh more like giving us road blocks we had to try and get around say cloud and Tifa run to the bar where we see Barrett and Jesse battling the cloaks because I guess they couldn't see them now then okay so in battles there's other feature because you can't actually pause to change your loadout and such so a neat thing the game does is that in the cutscene where you get new party members if you hold square it opens up a menu just after the scene ends what the actual heck so we fight magical spooky cloaks and win in battle but of course lose in the cutscene with Jesse breaking an ankle well what a coincidence you know tithi asked me to stay behind there like I can help you out on your bombing mission if you pay up consider it done d now he seems happy to spend money on us I'm counting on you soldier boy say yes now begins the next section where the game tells us we won't be back here for a while so let's head to the reactor by running endlessly on a train line from closer into further out B C D and so on up to what to Eve during this we also see that commander called PI dig sure he goes on about how they are monitoring us to use the group to blame for another reactor blowing up for some evil plans they have I he's a very angry evil man so we make our way through fighting mechs and bugs we then find ourselves on a walkway trying to turn off these giant lights I divert the power to move forward and this was where I really started like the game as he had most of the main characters together and I don't know I didn't find this puzzle too challenging or anything but yeah okay square you did really good with the sky images but I don't know does anyone feel like this is literally a flat 2d image still kind of cool being up here but so we make it to where Biggs is giving us the equipment we need before he eats out then heading through the reactor cloud randomly gets a vision of cowboy Tifa holding several sword yeehaw and during our journey tefa also gets the courage to continue the mission pushing away any doubt she has because this is the right thing to do but then around this time the trio kind of realized why wasn't it really easy breaking in wouldn't they be on high alert since we blew a reactor up already oh no you don't think Shinra the powerful company controlling Mitka might have set a trap and that yeah because the president appears before them telling us that our actions have consequences being broadcast live on TV showing to every civilian that we are the ones who caused all this mess blowing up their power supply and to give everyone a show he sets about building a huge magnified us live on TV however Barret is like hey wouldn't it be cool if we actually managed to beat the mek on live TV then everyone will see how cool we are yeah sure why not okay listen up y'all y'all got a rise up ferret who are you talking to the people put me on TV I will drop some truth times like these you gotta save it oh no if you're about to ask me to dance then don't come on don't be shy how about you cloud I don't dance now before we continue I'd just like to mention some things about this game so far one holy moley this game is attractive not just from the character designs but to how the models look in game although it is weird seeing these realistic models cycle through animation sets which I know is just to save time but it just still feels a bit odd the game itself is stunning with amazing detail in the world with a particle effects the atmosphere and I'm just so happy square seems to hit their stride with the Unreal Engine secondly the voice acting okay so like wow these are amazing now interesting to note I don't know the main character voices as I don't recall them hearing them in other JRPG roles they actually sound distinctly new I mean Aerith is even voiced by a youtuber and they just fit so well like these voices are perfect I love them so much I will say some of the side characters can be a bit odd like you hear a voice from another game a wedge but yeah with all that this really just feels like how a Final Fantasy game should be in the modern era you hear that 15 I love everything about this game so much from what I've seen now in a cool way in this part of the reactor you can actually get key cards to take out parts of the machine the Prez was building that's handicapping it right before your big fight I actually like this a lot and the party take out give you rewards which you first have to obtain by doing a minigame it's simple really we move the levers at the same time shake it off three two one shake it off hey I think I should lead after all oh hell no how about this we're doing it my way 3 2 1 we really did it great timing right on the money yeah however before we escape Prezi boy gives us another speech saying how even though we are an ex-soldier we won't have long to live due to whatever they pumped into us Barrett tries to give an environmental speech but the president is like you do realize people don't care they love electricity it helps the gamers play the games also I'm gonna commit fraud and say you're best friends with our sworn enemy the Wutai so thanks for furthering our war efforts since now the public will be on our side believing Wutai are blowing up the reactors this is of course false but before we can speak we have a really tough boss battle the tree are stuck on this grid and have to dodge its huge lasers but thankfully since we took out the key components they easily win so after refocusing the group wind it do a big explode separating us from the - and even though Barrett could shoot the machines cloud tells him to take Tifa and escape he does so the reactor blows up and we Falls to our death now while cloud is dead let me say it's kinda weird how this game is not really the full story as it was a big deal pre-release how this isn't the full story of ff7 which I mean this was just part of the game and that's crazy to me since this thing is a hundred gigs so because they split it up I'll do the same yes if you want to see me talk about a certain dress event and get this video to 2,000 likes and the next one I upload will be part two so with that I hope you enjoyed this one and I'll see you all next time also by the way you better type in the comments Aerith is better than t4 I swear to God [Music]

Channel: Ram Revie

Views: 147,595

Keywords: ramzaes, final fantasy, final fantasy 7, final fantasy 7 remake, ff7, ff7r, playstation 4, cloud strife, tifa, aerith, barret, comedy, funny gameplay, review, final fantasy 7 review, final fantasy 7 spoilers, final fantasy 7 remake gameplay, the completionist, theradbrad, asleep in the fantasy, one-winged angel, illuminat3d

Id: tq5833Z4UKk

Length: 29min 37sec (1777 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 29 2020