Film Theory: Is Miss Peregrine's BETTER than Hogwarts? (Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children)

do you feel different do you have to hide your true self from others are you frankly a bit of a weirdo then let's be honest normal school isn't for you you deserve better you deserve met Pat's guide to young adult schools for mutants monsters and magic users hello Internet welcome to film theory the YouTube show guaranteed to get you a perfect score on the SATs actual number of the perfect score may vary boy the year summer is long over in students across the world have returned to school to reluctantly learn math history and Transfiguration Oh was that a last one not offered to you well maybe you're just at the wrong school as we've learned from the last ten years of young adult movies and fiction magical schools are everywhere there are schools for vampires schools for mutants schools for magicians even schools for magicians who want to get a little action on the side oh they're kids let's lower those wands a bit shall we but with so many options out there how can I find the best school for my needs well fear not because that's the question I plan on answering today which magical school is objectively the best I'm ranking through the most prestigious fictional schools for gifted students of our time Hogwarts from Harry Potter Xavier's school for gifted youngsters from the x-men series and the new kid on the block miss peregrine's home for peculiar children simply because it's different and because the movie is coming out it has just come out whenever you watch this video and because it's actually a pretty interesting series but how do we go about ranking these schools well in real life there are multiple lists like the US News & World Report which serve as ranking systems to compare schools based on criteria like average class size job placement rates classes offered things like that it's like the one type of listicle that WatchMojo hasn't milked dry at this point it's not giving them any ideas anyway in preparing for today's episode I settled on the formula used by one of the most well respected rating systems the Princeton Review which rates each school according to eight different categories so how does some of the world's best magical schools stack up we're about to find out oh and in case it isn't obvious your choice at school will involve a couple of spoilers for these movies so be warned then again your education is too important so let's not waste any more time let's go category one academics the first thing you think about when it comes to a school is how good are their classes and how diverse is their curriculum all academic courses at Hogwarts are in two teaching students about the Wizarding World and will they do a good job of it students only learn about the Wizarding World from what we can tell in the books and movies there's only one class muggle studies that's related to the outside world at all and because of this graduates from Hogwarts can care for a flower worm but can't you know do things like read frigging calculating a tip at a restaurant because they've literally never taken a math class instead the closest Hogwarts students get is a rhythm NC which is predicting the future through numbers basically numerology Illuminati confirmed and that's not to mention everything else that they're clueless about you must know all about Mongoose what exactly is the function of a rubber duck right miss Peregrine school by contrast is much more concerned with teaching students to defend themselves or stay hidden they do teach regular subjects which is why this qualifies as a school but the problem is that the school is stuck in a time loop back in 1940 this means all the students are missing almost 75 years of history technology Game of Thrones episodes everything in fact miss Peregrine's deliberately hides information from her students to ensure that they never leave don't get me wrong I love you miss PE but it might be time to upgrade to some newfangled learning tools like say 8-track tapes cassette decks laser discs by the way do school still use laser discs it was always so random when a teacher would pull one of those things out what's a laser disk you ask well basically the record sized compact discs what's a record what's a compact disc man I feel ancient so that leaves us with Xavier's school for gifted youngsters which is surprisingly designed to be just like an ordinary private school as a student there you'll be learning normal history signs in English in between phys ed classes featuring laser eye target practice in fact according to the x-men Survival Guide to the mansion every student must impart be premed no joke mixing algebra with magnetic satellite moving the curriculum here is clearly the most balanced first point to house Xavier category to financial aid a key consideration in any college decision is how much funding the school provides for its students to less the crippling debt it'll put them in for the next ten years of their lives lucky for our gifted students all three of our schools are set up like safe houses on top of just being places of higher education as a result there's no tuition no bursar bills and no student loans hanging over your head upon graduation come to think about it that's probably the single most fictional thing about these fictional schools you gotta pay those student loans but probably shouldn't have taken that extra course in ethics a but with Hogwarts you've really got to read your fine print because before you can say Petrificus Totalus you're getting hit with all sorts of hidden fees you've got to have your robes your cauldron your wand all those books including the one that literally bites you Hogwarts even has a pet on the back-to-school shopping list and we know that this stuff is expensive a universal studios of Waddell runya $50 thing is even a magic wand it's like a plastic remote control has less functionality than a Wii mote oh look I turned on the lantern thanks for the magical experience Universal doesn't even have a phoenix feather in there I mean Harry is lucky enough to have two dead parents who left him with a cavern full of gold to pay his bills but a middle-income family like the Weasleys need to use all hand-me-down robes books and even rats as a result the points for this round go to both miss Peregrine's and Xavier school categories three and four faculty Princeton Review has two categories here one how qualified and two how accessible the teachers are miss Peregrine's has the greatest disadvantage here since it only has one faculty member and on the experience side miss Peregrine's may be well-versed in peculiar dumb yes for those of you who haven't read the books or seen the movie yet that is what they call their special ability it's a good series of books but it is as ridiculous as it sounds let's be honest her qualifications as an actual teacher are somewhat loose she grew up in the 1920s and deliberately ignores any progress made in science tech art and history I suppose you could say that she's a bit of a birdbrain cuz she's an in Bream which have the ability to turn into birds whatever it's a complicated fictional world okay on the other hand at least she has a lot of office hours and makes breakfast for the whole class it's not enough to get her the points though by contrast the Hogwarts faculty are all actual professors and fully specialized in their subject a lot of them have real experience like mad-eye moody or are known for their academic rigor like Snape even their office hours are pretty good I mean in most movies you can barely avoid these teachers even if you're literally wandering the halls at 3:00 a.m. under an invisibility cloak for crying out loud Dumbledore kept coming back to give area advice even after he was dead and so then what about Xavier 'he's well unfortunately he just seems to scrape up whatever mutants are available and throw them into a random subject sure Professor Charles Xavier has a doctorate from Oxford but do you really think Cyclops is qualified to teach geometry he doesn't even have depth perception and what about accessibility well unfortunately the x-men are only teaching in between major world crises which basically happen all the time at which point they take up their real jobs as you know the x-men I think you're gonna be scorned well on to a CT when your teachers been gone for the last three weeks trying to wrangle magneto back into his little plastic box I don't think so thus its Hogwarts far and away that has the best faculty both in terms of quality and accessibility two points for house Hogwarts categories five and six campus life and safety what good is the quality of the education and the training of the faculty if students are living under constant fear of death a school first and foremost needs to be safe which when it comes to these schools means these categories are just awash sure Xavier looks like this beautiful manner but hello it's built over the x-men headquarters it's like building Harvard on top of a nuclear testing site in the span of a few decades we literally see the school overtaken by the military ransacked and completely obliterated in the comics the place gets destroyed like every ten issues and while Hogwarts may seem like the better option with its secluded campus and great extracurricular activities like Quidditch hogs meat and dances it also has a tree in the front yard that can eat cars a basilisk in the plumbing a troll in the girls bathroom as well as deadly spiders and angry centaurs just off of school grounds and that's not including the time Death Eaters snuck their way through security murdered the principal and destroyed the castle in the middle of what amounted to a Wizarding race war miss Peregrine's seems like it should have the easy win here right they literally repeat the same sunny day over and over what could possibly go wrong well that's sunny day that they repeat over and over again happens to be the one where the school found itself in a direct path with a world war two bomb dropped 4head the only thing saving the students every 24 hours is that it exists in a time loop that resets when the bomb is inches from landing that said if the loop isn't reset that bomb will literally demolish the school and all of its inhabitants oh yeah I forgot to mention if any of the students decide to leave the loop everyone will age forward by the 80 years they've missed and immediately die so yeah no winners in these categories geez it's a miracle anyone seems to even graduate category 7 job prospects what's the point of a school if not to get a job after graduation I mean a school that can get even their English majors lucrative work is definitely doing something right well even though Xavier students learn normal school subjects most of them are encouraged by Charles himself to rejoin the world or stereo and teach others and yet most students end up just doing that second part becoming part time teachers and full-time x-men neither of which are particularly stable jobs considering the health risks we covered back in categories 5 and 6 as for miss Peregrine's because of that pesky time loop students never age and considering that they're all under 18 those babyfaces are gonna hurt them in their long term job prospects but honestly it's not like any of that even matters when you're stuck reliving the same day over and over again it's not like you're ever gonna make it to payday in the first place and again there's that whole leave the time loop and you die things so let's just say that there are a few hurdles to long term job security on that one meanwhile most students at Hogwarts graduate and settle into magical jobs like ministry officials dragon hunters Quidditch players which easily puts Hogwarts at the top of this category Hogwarts gains a point in job prospects which means that our score going into the final round is Hogwarts 3 Xavier school for gifted youngsters to miss peregrine's home for peculiar children at one point and since there's only one category left does that mean that this is basically over that there's no way the other schools can take down Hogwarts well don't be too sure let's look at that last criteria category 8 selectivity of admissions now admittedly at first glance this doesn't seem like much of a game-changer Xavier school for gifted youngsters never rejects any mutant they'll even admit mutants whose powers negate the powers of other mutants or mutants who have formerly destroyed the school or muse that seduced the students seriously they seem to accept everyone Hogwarts too is open to Wizards from all walks of life even if their parents are the Mort supporters I'm looking at you Draco and miss Peregrine's home is open to anyone who exhibits peculiar symptoms or is pale enough to star in a Tim Burton film but when you really look at the admissions process two of these schools kind of suck institutions that at their core are fundamentally discriminatory ageist and ableist they exclude people based on attributes they have no control over like their genetics and their physical abilities which would be like Harvard only allowing men but not just men only white men who are also blond-haired and blue-eyed not born with a peculiar soul well then sorry but Peregrine's doors are shut Tia in fact not only can non peculiars enter the school's loop if they somehow manage to enter campus grounds they would actually lose their mind that's no exaggeration they will literally lose their mind and if you think that's bad Hogwarts admissions practices are actually illegal you see according to the Pottermore official website Hogwarts Admissions is dictated by the quill of acceptance and the book of admittance and the book has a perfect track record of keeping squibs out of Hogwarts this is also confirmed by JK Rowling on our old official website that no squib has ever attended Hogwarts no as a refresher scripts like Argus Filch or non magic children born to witches and wizards basically their wizard born muggles and being a squib is like the single worst thing that you can be in the Wizarding World in fact the word squib is basically like a racial slur to them so then why is it such a big deal if they're kept out of Hogwarts they're not magical anyway so the decision to send those children off to muggle schools makes a lot of sense rights well with the exception of race private schools can discriminate on the basis of things like religion or ability but that's only if they don't receive federal funding if a private school receives even a dollar of government funding they're subject to anti-discrimination laws including things like the Americans with Disabilities Act here in the US or disability rights in the UK that's the one that would apply to Hogwarts and Hogwarts receives funding from the Ministry of Magic JK Rowling even confirmed the funding herself on Twitter and even though it's barely mentioned in the books in the movies I can confirm that the Ministry of Magic gets its money outside of what it receives from private donations from Lucius Malfoy types from taxpaying wizards and witches as evidenced by the existence of the hexing tax you see right here so what we have in Hogwarts is a school that receives funding from taxpayers that willfully discriminates against the wizard born children the squibs and that quite frankly is illegal based on the letter of the law as such Hogwarts technically should be shut down by the government or be required to open its doors and here I thought that you were a guy who would appreciate diversity Dumbledore and that leaves only Xavier school which believe it or not allows non mutants to study there took some digging across a lot of fictional yearbooks but for 10 issues a non mutant by the name of Walter Lambert speaks about how he earned his way into Xavier school off of academic merit alone a non mutant in the mutant private school why you would want to go there considering your school gets destroyed every few months and half the curriculum doesn't apply to your skill set is beyond me but hey you could totally do it you know on second thought though I guess getting taught pre-med by Wolverine would be pretty awesome the guy is an expert on healing after all but all in all when the dust settles Xavier school is the number one gifted student University based on the Princeton Review rankings which brings us to the moral of today's episode what we think these schools would be great to go to in real life the fact of the matter is that none of them would want the rabble like us well you know what they can keep their potions I'll see the rest of you in home act today we're learning about how to clean grout now that is a real magic trick but hey that's just a theory a film theory and cut alright so you might not be learning the most practical skills at any of these schools but if you're eager to get yourself some real-world useful learnings then head on over to the wisecrack channel we're constantly doing fun insightful analysis of all your favorite movie franchises in fact if you're still watching this video it means that one you probably liked it and two you're probably here for more x-men goodness hence me recommending to you their analysis of x-men first class which has some super cool insight into Magneto's transformation throughout the movie into the monster that he always sought to destroy man just saying that made me feel like ten times smarter plus when it comes to their videos you can by those sick eyebrows love those things it's like a toupee for the upper eyelid so anyway click here to check out the wisecrack channel and then tell them I sent you so I can rub it in their faces that I sent a bunch of viewers over to them it's all part of a friendly little rivalry that we have it's not friendly at all it's actually bitter bitter rivals now if you'll excuse me next week we kick off scary October by getting dark and green see you then

Channel: The Film Theorists

Views: 6,257,597

Keywords: harry potter, miss peregrine's home for peculiar children, miss peregrine, x-men, xmen, x men, professor x, xavier, hogwarts, wizard, mutant, film theory, film theorists, film theory matpat, matpat, matthew Patrick, matpatgt, harry potter and the goblet of fire, harry potter and the sorceror's stone, xmen apocalypse, xmen days of future past, days of future past

Id: E0-Coza3z2E

Length: 16min 3sec (963 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 27 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/daysofchristmaspast]

Lol yeah MatPat always pulls stuff out of his ass. He's one of the worst examples of declining quality with increasing popularity

[u/paperplanes101]

Was about to post with "nope, Hogwarts received more points and they both lost anyways".

[u/frostedWarlock]

Xavier's allows non mutants

Xavier's allowed a non-mutant

once

as a PR move

but no say he got in cuz he earned it

[u/KingKunter]

I remember when Ransom Riggs , years ago, announced Miss Peregrine on his youtube channel, I bought it, read it, thought it was awesome but I thought no one was going to notice the book. I just found out with this post that it was really well received, and he even got to do the movie!

He is a great filmmaker and I want to share with you the short film by him that got me hooked to his work, if you haven't seen it: The Accidental Sea.

[u/FondSteam39]

I used to love that channel at the start of the year. But now it has declined in value so much. He puts no effort at all into his videos and from what I've heard he gets pissy when someone says he doesn't want to pay for the videos.

[u/gzintu]

MatPat's clickbait yay

[u/Wertz_McSchmertz]

Matpat is always like that. (Cue rant about Overwatch vs. TF2 debate)