Exodus 20:12 NIV

greetings to you in the name of our lord and savior jesus christ i'm thankful that you decided to tune into this bible study today there's a lot going on around us and inside of us and it's good to just take some time and to look up and look to the lord for guidance and comfort and direction in life psalm 96 begins with a wonderful call to worship it says the sing to the lord a new song sing to the lord all the earth sing to the lord praise his name proclaim his salvation day after day declare his glory among the nations his marvelous deeds among all peoples that's the task that god has given to his people to declare god's glory in this very broken and hurting world and to tell of his salvation to all people groups and so my prayer is that we would do that faithfully no matter what we're facing in our lives let's pray today heavenly father we thank you that you brought us together here to study your word and to listen to you lord help us lord to have ears that are open to what you want to teach us today lord help our hearts to be open so that we would follow your will for our lives thank you lord that in these troubling times you are our rock and our refuge and that we can go to you lord at any moment of any day we can pour out our hearts to you because you hear us lord and you love us open our minds lord today as we study your word in jesus name amen in our study of the ten commandments we are on commandment number five commandment number five which says this i'm gonna read it from exodus and also from deuteronomy chapter five so exodus 20 first of all it says honor your father and your mother so that you may live long in the land the lord your god is giving you and then from deuteronomy chapter 5 this the same commandment honor your father and your mother as the lord your god has commanded you so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the lord your god is giving you you know you're apparent when you count the sprinkles on each kid's cupcake to make sure they're exactly equal you know you're apparent when you know the words to every song in the movie frozen one or two you know you're a parent when you have to hide in the bathroom just to get time alone and even that doesn't work very long does it you know you're a parent when you consider finger paint to be a controlled substance you know you're a parent when going to work sounds like a break taking a break from your responsibilities you know you're a parent when you go out with friends and you automatically start cutting up their food for them ah yes as many of us know it is not easy to be a parent but today as we look at the fifth commandment we are reminded that it's not easy to be a child either honor your father and your mother this is something that god has to tell us to do it doesn't necessarily come naturally not in a world that's broken by sin so this morning we're going to talk about what this commandment means why it is so important and how we can do it so the first question what does the fifth commandment really mean it's interesting that in every culture throughout all of history there have been rules about the duties of children toward their parents and the duties of parents toward their children centuries ago the the great philosopher plato said that on a scale of human virtues honor to parents is second only to piety to god maybe that's why the first group of the ten commandments the first four begin with commandment number one honor me as god right and and those four commandments have to do with our relationship with god our worship of god but the second group of commandments starting with commandment number five is a group that talks about our duty to each other to our fellow man and it begins with number five honor your father and your mother people of all times and cultures have realized that healthy families are the foundation of healthy societies there's no way of getting around that and in a way the family is kind of a microcosm of society isn't it it's a miniature version of society so when we learn to live well in the family we also are prepared to live well in society but the other side is true too when we do not learn how to live well in the family chances are we're going to struggle to live well in society the warden the prison warden may have to teach us what our father should have when a third grader shouts obscenities at his teacher you can be very sure that something went very wrong in the home this is why the heidelberg catechism one of the statements of faith wisely points out that there is a broader issue at stake in this commandment than just the home than just honoring your father and your mother it asks this question what is god's will for us in the fifth commandment and here's the answer that the catechism gives that i honor love and be loyal to my father and mother and all those in authority over me that i obey and submit to them as is proper when they correct and punish me and also that i be patient with their failings for through them god chooses to rule us in other words the fifth commandment is a commandment about respecting authority something we don't talk very much about it starts with parents because well that's where we start our life right in the home but it also includes teachers coaches referees policemen presidents elders deacons pastors judges drill sergeants health professionals and many others whom god may choose to put in authority over us at various times and in various places in our lives and what does god require of us in relationship to these people well to honor them to respect them let's take a closer look at those words when it says honor your father and your mother the hebrew word is kavod which means simply heavy weight weightiness the idea is take these people seriously give appropriate weight to what they say kind of like what we say when we when we talk about well oh that's heavy that's heavy right it means that's important i got i got to take that seriously in the new testament the greek word is timos which really means honor or office it tells us that this commandment is not just about people it's also about the position they hold their office their god-given role in society and in our lives so the idea here is that in every area of life beginning in the home god has established structures of authority for the well-being and for the thriving of human community and he calls on us to honor the people who hold those positions of authority over us not just because of who these people are but because of the office because of the position that they hold so when a judge or a president is introduced such as even you know a tv judge those present are instructed all rise for the honorable judge judy and everybody stops talking and stands up or you better you better do that or judy will go after you but we are not being asked to like or disagree or agree with this person we are commanded to respect her office her position her authority now this is an especially important insight for those of us who grew up in particularly dysfunctional families you know over the many years of being a pastor i've often heard people say you know it's very hard for me to honor my father and my mother my dad abandoned us when i was seven my mother was a raging alcoholic she was never there for us and it's very difficult for me to honor them well this commandment does not say that we need to agree with everything our parents say nor does it mean that we need to approve of everything our parents did nor does it say that we should submit ourselves to abuse or to anything that goes contrary to god's will or even the laws of the state it says that we should respect the office the position they hold as mother and father says we should give weighty consideration to what god has taught us through them whether it's good or bad by a good or bad example you know sometimes our parents taught us what to avoid right we say i'm not going to do that i'm not going to do that those consequences are are pretty rotten i'm not going to go that way so maybe you can see now how this commandment can help us deal with difficult difficult and disappointing relationships doesn't mean we have to agree with what a person says or does but we respect the position that they hold understanding the concept of honor also helps us understand our changing responsibilities at different stages of our life when we are children to honor means basically to obey this is what paul says in ephesians 1 is 6 1. he says children obey your parents in the lord for this is right when we become adolescents and young adults honoring may mean respecting or cooperating when we become adults honoring our parents may mean visiting or calling them listening to them encouraging them maybe even at some point caring for them and even after our parents are gone honoring them means remembering them speaking well of them and passing on the legacy of faith to the next generation and for those of us who came from broken hurting families maybe the best way that we can honor our parents is simply to forgive them and why is this so important well two reasons first of all because it honors god paul says in romans 13 verses 1 and 2 everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities for there is no authority except that which god has established the authorities that exist have been established by god consequently he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what god has instituted and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves let me give you a couple examples of that principle from the bible in genesis chapter 9 there's a story that could be entitled god dad's gone wild noah plants a vineyard and he makes wine and he gets drunk he stumbles home and he passes out naked in the middle of the tent and one of his three sons ridicules his father for which god punishes him two other sons walk backwards and cover their dad up they respected the one who held the office of father even though that father acted in an unrespectable manner that's one story it's another one from first samuel 24. it's a story about david who had a chance to kill wicked king saul who was actually at that time trying to kill david but david refuses to seize that opportunity and he says this the lord forbid that i should do such a thing to my master the lord's anointed or lift my hand against him for he is the anointed of the lord david respects the office of the king even though that king behaved in a very disrespectful way even jesus when he stood before pontius pilate said you would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above given to you from god and jesus submitted to pilate's authority as bible teacher andrew kivenhoven says the honor that the fifth commandment requires is religious we obey for god's sake obey your parents in the lord ephesians 6 verse 1 thus we obey our parents not because they are the wisest and fairest but because they are the parents god has given us and we pay our taxes and honor presidents and prime ministers not because they are of our political party but because god demands it the second reason for obeying this commandment is this it's good for us life goes better for us and for those in our family when we respect authority in ephesians 6 2 paul notes that this is the first commandment that has a promise attached to it and what is that promise well deuteronomy 5 verse 16 says that it may go well with you in the land the lord your god gives you that's a promise you show respect for your teachers and you're going to learn something you show respect for your boss and well chances are you're going to keep your job who knows maybe you'll even get a promotion you show respect to the police officer and the law and the judge it's a good way of staying out of jail you honor your parents and your children will learn to honor you they'll follow your example and that blessing will be passed on for generations to come it will go well for your people but the flip side of this blessing is a warning when we practice or when we tolerate disrespect whether in the home or in society things do not go well for us families break down schools don't work the streets aren't safe and we can't build prisons fast enough the consequences of disrespect are chaos and anarchy society falls apart when people don't respect each other so what can we do about it how can we obey the fifth commandment and enjoy the blessing that it promises the best place to start is in the home and at an early age i recently read that the cause of juvenile delinquency is not always apparent sometimes it's two parents it's a little joke people parents parents begins there mom and dad demand respect from your children god has given you a position of authority that your children need to respect so don't tolerate disrespect because ultimately it will damage your kids but on the other hand don't provoke them to anger either don't abuse your children in the name of discipline they they may disagree with you they don't have to agree with you but they may not disrespect you do not entrust the training of your children to the tv set to the streets to the internet or for that matter what they see in their friends explain the difference between our family and what they see and hear elsewhere it's okay to say you know we don't talk that way to each other in our family no matter what other families choose we don't do that here provide them with specifics about what constitutes respectful behavior they've got to learn that you need to teach them that we have to ask ourselves what do we want our children to be like in 20 years what seed are we sowing in their lives who do we want to send out into the world and what will it take for them to become responsible respectful members of the church and of society responsible and respectful employees employers parents or citizens because that's what we're aiming for secondly you and i need to model respect at every opportunity do you show respect to your parents or to their memory if they're no longer here do you show respect to your spouse how do you talk to your spouse what do you say to your kids about your spouse you know even if you don't have a good relationship with your spouse even if you two are not living together anymore show respect for that person even if you're divorced maybe especially if you are divorced watch how you talk to your kids about your ex watch that are you sowing a blessing or a curse into their life by the way you speak we always need to remember that that's the only mother that's the only father that our kids will have so respect your spouse you know sometimes the best choice is not to say anything rather than saying something negative or disrespectful about your spouse third respect your kids talk to them in the tone of voice that you would like them to use when they're talking to you communicate to them your love and a sense of their worth and their dignity remind them who they are in christ that's why paul says fathers do not exasperate your children but bring them up in the fear and discipline of the lord fourth respect those who are over you your boss your church leader government officials watch your language avoid using derogatory labels about anybody we need to remember that everybody's made in the image of god live a life that honors god above all in every circumstance you know i believe that if you and i develop a deep respect for god it's going to spill over into all our other relationships if you cultivate a deep respect and honor for god you will have what it takes to respect god's servants parents teachers authorities public health officials spiritual leaders and that's going to lead you into a full and rich life of blessing because that's god's promise let's pray heavenly father forgive us for disrespecting those whom you have placed in positions of authority help us to develop a deep respect for you and for your servants thank you heavenly father for parents teachers government officials for in first responders and and many others whom you have used to guide direct protect and bless us in jesus name we pray this amen receive this blessing from the lord now may the god of peace himself give you peace at all times and in all places the lord be with you all

Channel: New City Church North Long Beach

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Length: 27min 39sec (1659 seconds)

Published: Wed Nov 18 2020