I hope the speakers before me just
relaxed you a little and... ...you are not nervous any more.
Here is what I am going to tell you: I don't like puzzles. Never liked
them. Never been a huge puzzle fan. In the 39 years of my past life, I have never opened up a magazine
or newspaper to work on puzzles. That's how I felt. But when I
grew up I realized I was wrong. Actually what I do for
a living is like a puzzle. I find an idea,
a joke and then I pack it,... ...send it to you through media and
you work on this puzzle, ...you work it out and having
worked it out you smile and... ...you become happy an
you are glad that... ...you are able to understand it,
you are able to open the package. I also have a presentation.
I have done my homework. I am going to talk about a few
processes which lead to the joke, to the comics. "Look different"
This is the essence. What we call is taking an overturned
look at the way things are. Look this is not a joke.
This is just some graphics... ...I am going to use to explain
to you what it is all about. We have Umit Usta, our chef, he is
going to cook fried chicken with eggs; ...here is a list of ingredients,
this is the recipe,... you break the eggs and you mix them
and do this and do that and enjoy. I am trying to find a way to make it
look funnier. What can I do? I can replace the chef with something.
Maybe the chef could be a chicken. It may give some of you chuckles, this
is not finished humor but let's see: Here is the recipe.
First you kill a chicken. And then without getting
caught by the police, you dismember the body of the chicken
and then you take the children... of the dead chicken and put them
against one another. You break it. After that, you fry the pieces
of the body with hot oil. Maybe this is not the
ultimate humor but still by replacing man with a
chicken chef you can make it funny. Here is our imagination of hell.
Here is the demons. It is a place you go and suffer
punishment forever by being burned. I think it will take me only 15
minutes to burn out and disappear. This is the concept.
Now it is a puzzle for me. I have to create a puzzle
out of this concept. Maybe I can send someone to hell who
will actually enjoy it. If I can solve this puzzle then maybe
I will be successful. I think of all the possibilities. Like a detective in time, in place,
one thing that you find... You are going to work it out... Eskimos. It is like paradise for them. They say "Oh my, this must be
paradise,finally we are warm" Another thing is the teachings...
the teacher says, all of them are talented but one...
and the second one says, "I can use my mental powers
to levitate the whole class" This is one part of the puzzle. Another part is
"never accept what is imposed on you" because we are given so much crap
from the day we are born,... from the parents, from the schools... Once you start growing up
you start questioning... Internally you say, no,
it can't be that way. Humor is similar to that.
We know the girl,... ...we know the guy, this is
the frog prince and the princess. What is the story there?
She is supposed to kiss the frog and he will turn into a
handsome charming prince. Do you think she would act that way if
she lives in Istanbul in 2010? She would say, "you are going to
give me the title deed of the palace" I want a prenuptial otherwise
I won't marry, I won't kiss you. This is I think how it would work these
days. Here is another thing... And they lived happily ever after. When I say happily ever after, I mean
like 20-30 years. When I say happy, I mean they lived happily
for 3-4 years and... ...then they divorced and remarried. Do you know this guy? Hulk?
I used to call him Houlk. When I grew up and learned pronouncing
in English it became Hulk. This is the guy who was exposed
radiation and when... ...he gets angry he mutates into a
giant. Very strong...Tossing around... Tanks and cars...
That sounds fine but what happens... if he just turns into Hulk when he is
making love to his girlfriend in bed? Maybe she would enjoy it but anyway if
this guy was an ordinary guy,... ...if he lived in Turkey,
what would happen to him? He says "don't shit in the toilet while
you are Hulk otherwise it gets too big" Now I am going to use some comics to
explain how I come up with jokes. The subject is important. Usually,
if I don't have a lot of time,... ...I am going to choose an idea which
is easier to produce of course. So I can use a desert scene because it
is easier to draw a desert you know. Several lines, several dots,
there you have a desert. This is not one of my best jokes but it
is a very good example. That's why I chose it,
what can be in the desert? Maybe you can talk about
an unfortunate Bedouin,... ...maybe a penguin, maybe an
astronaut falling onto the desert. Desert in the stone age... Desert in the future...everything
through time, through cultures... when I was looking for this joke, the
TV was on and there was the TV show- Lost, it was showing the plane crash in
one of the flashback scenes. Here I thought, ok,
I will have a plane crash. This is not enough for a joke. There is a need for something maybe
somebody survived the crash,... and he is just walking.
Still there is no joke here. This is not enough. I need to introduce
something more. Some kind of a conflict. A question.
So that I can build a joke on. Some other guy survived
the plane crash. What happens? He is usually met by
someone at the airport. He says, "Ercan Bey, I am here
to meet you", here is the problem. If I can solve the problem,
how does he know that the plane would crash at that exact point and who
is this guy and what happens... This is the problem.
If I can solve the problem,... then I have come up with a joke.
Anybody read this joke before? Anybody can guess what it is?
What can it be? I found it before... that's for the meeting of mediums,
the psychics meeting. He says yes, I know, he says,
yes I know. So he is all aware of the situation.
And people were not like the psychics, so I just tried to modify it a little
bit so that... they looked like psychic mediums. I am
going to talk about one more thing. I like using the hell scene.
I have never used this device before. Since I like the theme of hell,
I am going to talk about a joke which transpires in hell.
If you are drawing hell,... you must have, kind of
a gatekeeper here. A demon. I'm sorry if I'm obstructing the view.
Here you have one with sharp teeth... They are usually cool...
Because the people in the hell,... the prisoners were always
going to ask for something. Is there a cooler place around here?
Here is the pitchfork...The fork... Normally I draw better. This is a goat
with a belly. Goats with hooves. Just like this. Tail.
Just like that... Devil... A little fire here and there. Funny.
This isn't enough. You need something. Somebody must come here to say
something. I think about a lawyer. I mean if you tell many lies in your
life, that's where you will end up. One person was saying to the demon,
I want my lawyer and the demon says... he will be here in a minute.
That's the joke I remember. I have to create a problem here.
A guy is thrown into hell. He is a lawyer. Maybe he is not
aware that he is dead. He is there, coming with a laptop, he
is a workaholic apparently,... ...I haven't found the joke yet.
Let's see a funny man... Kind of a business person.
By the laptop... I don't know where the laptop came from
maybe they died together... Just like this. He has the laptop.
When he goes somewhere with a laptop, the first question is
"is there a wireless network here?" It is funny but not a full
grown joke yet. If he says, no, then he will have
his purpose. It won't be funny. Everything is ready but no wireless.
This is not funny enough. You can say
"Yes, we have 300 MB connection" Super. Let's write it. Now it looks a little funnier but
it is going for the better. If it goes for the better,
it is not always the best result. I have to introduce something which
brings it all down. I am going to cover it first and then
you will see it at the end so that... ...it is funnier. I haven't done that
since grade school, it is very funny. Can you see it? "But your laptop
will melt in 30 seconds" So we brought it down again.
We broke his spirits. When you smash it like this into
pieces, I mean if you see... Adriana Lima in an autopsy, you won't
think she is beautiful, I guess. I want to talk about resetting. The
greatest reset we use are swear words. And there is the political
discussion going on. You know... When somebody is talking
for hours on politics,... ...and then he just say,
when somebody says... "this political party will be coming to
power with 30% of the votes", and the other person says
"get the fuck out", ...you will have reset
that person suddenly. We hear from many people. Why do you use swear words? Children
are reading the jokes as well. I say it is necessary. It can't be your
only material of course. But whenever it is necessary
you have to use the slang. It is just like the Hollywood
movies you know. There is a guy whose family is killed,
whose house is burnt down and... so many things happen to him and
he just says "fuck you, you son of a bitch",
but in Turkish, the translation reads different:
It is something like "Goddamn it", it doesn't give the full sense.
This is the same about comics. Sometimes you have to use it.
This is another joke I drew. Family bear, the dad telling the stars,
to the sons, the father says this is the Ursa major and
this is the Ursa minor. And he says where is the Ursa Tiny? And the middle son says
there is no Ursa Tiny. And the other one says "Faggots". If you doesn't use this word like
"faggots" or if he says "oh damn", the joke is not that strong.
It is just like the TV translations. Damn it! I think it is not as good. Here is another one: "who wins the fight,
is going to be with me" "I will sleep with both of you"
And then he says "bitch!" Slut!. She deserves it. This one also deserves it. You sons of bitches! If I am a bird,
I am going to look for a worm... ...for couple of hours and
I get back to my nest,... ...only to find my children having
ordered takeaways from McDonald's. When I was in Leman, comics magazine, there was a story of Can Yücel,... the judge asked him in the court, "why did you use the word ass in your
article", he said to the judge, "I don't know judge, in our village,
they call an ass, an ass" that's why I used the word.
Thank you very much.
