Emotional Intelligence and Music | Maria Iturriaga | TEDxBerkleeValencia

my mother once told me Maria don't have kids I wasn't sure she was kidding or not in fact I'm still wondering the truth is the more I think about what my parents had to go through in order to raise a family of seven kids the more I understand my mother until be honest I'm not sure whether my parents had a perfectly designed plan in order to provide us the seven of us with a well-rounded education but they definitely had enough subjects to experiment with I was a six out of seven kids so by the time they had me they already knew what strategies were more effective there were three disciplines that we all had to go through music languages and swimming but on top of that they sent us to boarding school yeah well we're 13 two years in England and one year in France I remember my mother saying Maria you're going to love it they have a fantastic music program and you were a uniform and you'll drink tea she was really trying hard to sell it to us but I think she just wanted to get rid of us when I think about it I'm not sure whether my parents were totally aware of the consequences of their decision maybe not those two experiences music and studying abroad became capital in my life and arguably the best thing that my parents could have done for my education what good have these two experiences been for me I learned to successfully navigate in different environments throughout my life or sometimes the conditions were favorable but sometimes not obviously I'm not saying that everybody should be going through these experiences it's not always easy to be taken out of your comfort zone but in my case they became instrumental and significantly contributed to developing my emotional intelligence what did I gain by studying music what did I gain by studying abroad what did I gain by doing both I learned discipline resilience resistance to frustration I learned about myself and i learned about others because the most important thing was not my academic performance which of course it was important the most important thing was that all of those experiences helped me become more emotionally intelligent it is thanks to the experiences that I have always felt better equipped to make informed decisions in my life that have helped me become the person that I am today but what exactly is emotional intelligence and why has it become such a popular term is it really that relevant research on emotional intelligence has started with the studies of Salome and Mayer in 1990 so it's only about 25 years old but it became most popular with the publication of Daniel Goleman's bestseller emotional intelligence why it can matter more than IQ when I read this title I thought this is interesting don't give me hope think when you were young me younger so who in this room could multiply in their heads 55 times 44 anyone would you be able to do it now no definitely not me and that's because numeric aptitude is not a very malleable aptitude however emotional intelligence is a lot more flexible you can practice it and improve it every day emotional intelligence is the capacity to perceive understand and manage your own emotions as well as others Daniel Goleman outlines four capacities to describe emotional intelligence self-awareness self-management social awareness and relationship management shall we take a look at them I already told you that I am the sixth of seven cakes in my family any evidence of weakness meant death there was no room for errors an understanding my emotions was key for survival if I was fighting with my brother I had to know whether I was feeling fear or anger if my sister took my clothes without permission was I feeling envious was I insecure or was it jealous the first capacity in emotional intelligence is therefore to know what you feel and that is self-awareness and I can assure you that self-awareness I'm sure I'm I can assure you that music it's a great way to learn this for me getting used to performing the piano in front of an audience helped me develop my self-awareness and it strengthened my self-confidence you can't ignore the rollercoaster of emotions that goes inside you but just like with any discipline the more you practice the better you get at it music also became an emotional shelter for me or I sometimes think about it as an emotional translator that helped me understand my emotions and express my feelings what is the second capacity it is the ability to develop discipline and self-control Goldmann refers to it as self-management and let me tell you music for me has been the most demanding discipline in my entire education practice practice practice the great pianist Arthur Rubinstein used to say if I miss one day of practice I notice it if I miss two days of practice my manager notices it if I miss three days of practice the public knows it it's also thanks to disability that we learn to redirect and control our disruptive impulses and to be more prudent with our own judgment in other words to think before act and here's a funny story when I was in boarding school my first roommate was really and friendly and pretty but she was one of those Mean Girls so the first day we were having breakfast and she told me Maria you talk in your sleep really what do I say you were saying you are impolite that was my subconscious betray me and what happened was that throughout the day all I wanted to tell her was you are rude you're impolite but I had to exercise my ability my self-control my ability to redirect my impulsive I just wanted to talk to her face but of course when I know my self management of course when I fell asleep it all came out now you know what can happen if we share a room now what about the others gomen talks about a third capacity but it's called social awareness and it is the ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people and to treat individuals according to their emotional reactions music is probably the fastest and the most direct way to connect with emotions wasn't it great the performance that we saw before with Olivia see yeah it's impossible not to feel anything with music any musicians here well you all know that the first thing that you need to do when you're planning a band aside from not being late and knowing your part you really have to be listening to one another you have to understand when you're doing your solo and being the protagonist versus when you're accompanying or let's say you are the leader of the band leadership and the art of diplomacy are key to keeping the band together and to successfully develop your musical project and that is social awareness the fourth and last capacity and emotional intelligence is relationship management and it is the ability to create networks and to find common ground and to build rapport I already told you about my first day in boarding school now this is what happened on the second day in boarding school I went to the practice rooms to play the piano and this guy comes in and he was a singer from the school choir so we started chatting we became friends we started to play together and he introduced me to his other friends who were also musicians and we all became friends and then they introduced me to their other friends who were also positions and we became friends and I built a network music creates bonds between people and between cultures music is democratic and the people here in Valencia knows this very well there is a fantastic phenomenon happen in this region where in every family there is a musician and in every town the recessing phonic band and everybody plays together in a symphonic band from grandparents to grandchildren we all play and practice music together and this for me is an excellent example of how music being played and practiced together can be a unique tool for social cohesion today I have the honor of leading the Berkeley campus in volunteer and now I realize how all of those experiences during my youth were more important and deep than I would have ever imagined when I see all our students that come to Berkeley from more than 50 different countries it is they're so different from each other and it is absolutely amazing how in a matter of minutes they can start playing together and magic happens somehow they're able to quickly find a harmonious balance respecting each other's contributions and celebrating their differences listening to one another they all become one in a beautiful and spoken consensus music can be more than a technical skill for our students just like what it did for me it can serve as a catalyst to improve the relationship with themselves and with others music can help our students become smarter better people and more emotionally mature in fact scientific findings show positive correlation between emotional intelligence and cognitive abilities social functioning mental and health well-being and academic and workplace performance so if this is the case the question is simple why don't we learn this in this schools why don't we incorporate lis incorporate this in our education systems why do we always give priority to subjects like like maths science or technology which of course are important well why do we always find at the very bottom or sometimes even in existence the courses that precisely help us develop our emotional intelligence I think it's quite remarkable that we have invented the internet that we have phones with more computing power than a computer from the 90s that we have discovered embryonic stem cells we're launching spacecraft to Mars and yet as a society and as individuals we too often react just like gamma puts it with too often reacts to conflict and life vicissitudes with an emotional repertoire tailored for the urgencies of the pleistocene let's be aware of this big deficit in our education systems and let's address it let's foster Anakin academic and education model that expands her horizon and develops our human potential I have thought a lot about what my mother told me but I wouldn't recommend her advice let's have kids and let's teach them music because perhaps despite this world that we live in with all of these difficulties these difficulties they will face with music and emotional intelligence they can become wiser and happier thank you

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 58,147

Keywords: TEDxTalks, English, Spain, Education, Emotions, Higher education, Music (topic)

Id: WDSL1x9lnos

Length: 13min 54sec (834 seconds)

Published: Wed May 25 2016