- SO BRUNO MARS IS IN
HIS DRESSING ROOM RIGHT NOW WAITING FOR A NURSE
THAT WE HAVE. WE HAVE HIDDEN CAMERAS
IN HIS DRESSING ROOM. HE HAS AN EARPIECE. HE'S GOT TO SAY WHATEVER I TELL
HIM TO SAY TO THE NURSE, AND, BRUNO, WHEN SHE COMES IN, JUST--FIRST THING,
JUST WHEN SHE COMES IN, JUST SAY, "THANKS FOR COMING," AND "DO YOU MIND TAKING
YOUR SHOES OFF?" THAT'S THE FIRST THING. - GOT IT.
- OKAY. [knocking] - COME IN. HI, HOW ARE YOU? COULD YOU TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF,
PLEASE? - WHAT?
- THAT'S A NO-- - NO-SHOE ZONE.
- NO-SHOE ZONE. - OH, I'M SORRY.
- DO YOU MIND? - AS A NURSE,
I NEED TO KEEP MY SHOES ON. - DO YOU MIND? - I'M SORRY? - I'M SORRY?
WHAT? - AS A NURSE,
I NEED TO KEEP MY SHOES ON. - OH, THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU'RE A NURSE. - OH, THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU'RE A NURSE. - OKAY.
- OKAY. - OKAY, I'M BRUNO. - I'M BRUNO. - NICE TO MEET YOU.
- NICE TO MEET YOU. - WELL, ACTUALLY,
WHEN I'M NOT ONSTAGE, MY NAME IS RAMON. - WELL, ACTUALLY,
WHEN I'M NOT ONSTAGE, MY NAME IS RAMON. - OH. - YOU CAN CALL ME RAMON. - BUT YOU--
SO YOU CAN CALL ME RAMON. - RAMON?
- YES. - OKAY. - OKAY, AND YOUR NAME IS?
- AND YOUR NAME IS? - MY NAME IS DEBORAH.
- DEBORAH. - DEBORAH.
- TELL ME ABOUT YOUR TRAINING. HOW MUCH TRAINING DO YOU HAVE? - CAN YOU TELL ME
ABOUT YOUR TRAINING? - OKAY. - HOW MUCH TRAINING HAVE YOU
HAD? - WELL, PRETTY MUCH,
I WENT TO SCHOOL-- IT'S ABOUT A YEAR AND A HALF. - MM.
- MM. - I'M LICENSED BY THE STATE
OF CALIFORNIA. - OKAY.
- OKAY, YOU SEEM NICE. - YOU SEEM NICE.
- OH, THANK YOU. - SO JUST THE ONE NURSE
THEY SENT, RIGHT? - JUST THE ONE NURSE THEY SENT? - YES.
- OKAY, THAT'S GOOD. - OKAY, THAT'S GOOD. - I'M FEELING
SOMETHING IN MY THROAT, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS. - WAS I SUPPOSED TO ASSESS YOU? - YEAH, I'M FEELING
SOMETHING IN MY THROAT, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS. - OKAY. - I JUST DON'T WANT YOU TO TOUCH
ME, THOUGH. - I JUST DON'T WANT YOU
TO TOUCH ME, THOUGH. - OH.
THAT'S FINE. - OKAY.
- OKAY, UM... ARE YOU ABLE TO SWALLOW OKAY? - NO, I HAVE NOT SWALLOWED
SINCE THE SUPER BOWL. - NO, I HAVEN'T--I HAVEN'T
SWALLOWED SINCE THE SUPER BOWL. - IT'S LIKE A--I HAVE, LIKE, A
CHIP IN MY MOUTH OR SOMETHING. - LAST WEEK, OR? - IT'S LIKE I HAVE A CHIP
IN MY MOUTH OR SOMETHING. - I HAD A CHIP DURING HALFTIME. I HAD A--EITHER A CHEX MIX, OR-- - I HAD A CHIP DURING HALFTIME.
- OH, YEAH. - IT WAS EITHER CHEX MIX... - OR A DORITO.
- OR DORITO... - OR A FRITO.
- FRITO. - PRINGLE.
- OKAY. - PRINGLE.
- IT WAS NOT A PRINGLE. I WAS WANTING A PRINGLE,
BUT THEY DID NOT-- - I WAS WANTING A PRINGLE,
IT WASN'T A PRINGLE, ACTUALLY. - THEY DID NOT GIVE ME PRINGLES,
AND I'D ASKED FOR THAT. - THEY DIDN'T GIVE ME PRINGLES.
I ASKED FOR PRINGLES. - NO PRINGLES
IN MY DRESSING ROOM. - THERE WAS NO PRINGLES
IN MY DRESSING ROOM. - WHY DO PRINGLES COME
IN A TENNIS BALL-- - WHY DO PRINGLES COME
IN TENNIS BALL CANS? - LIKE, WHY DO THEY DO THAT,
DO YOU THINK? - WHY DO YOU THINK THEY DO THAT? - PROBABLY BECAUSE THE SHAPE
OF IT. - OH, YOU'RE RIGHT,
YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU'RE RIGHT.
- YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU'RE RIGHT.
- YOU'RE RIGHT, THE SHAPE. - OKAY, THIS HAPPENED ONCE
BEFORE WHEN I WAS IN CANADA. - THIS HAPPENED ONCE BEFORE
WHEN I WAS IN CANADA. - IT'S A FUNNY STORY, ACTUALLY. - IT'S A FUNNY STORY,
ACTUALLY. [audience laughter] - ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS, THEN? - OH, I WAS JUST THINKING IT
TO MYSELF. - NO, I WAS JUST THINKING IT
TO MYSELF. - OH, GOT IT. - YOU HAD TO BE THERE.
- YOU HAD TO BE THERE. - OH, OKAY. - HOW MANY THROATS HAVE YOU
LOOKED AT? - HOW MANY THROATS
HAVE YOU LOOKED AT? - QUITE A FEW. DOES IT--WOULD IT FREAK YOU OUT
IF I ACTUALLY TOUCH YOUR THROAT? - YOU CAN TOUCH MY THROAT.
- TO CHECK IT? - YOU CAN TOUCH MY THROAT. - OKAY, DO YOU MIND
WITH MY HANDS, OR WOULD YOU RATHER ME PUT
A GLOVE ON OR SOMETHING IF IT FREAKS YOU OUT? - TWO GLOVES.
- CAN YOU PUT TWO GLOVES ON? - THAT'S FINE. - DID YOU SEE ME ON
THE SUPER BOWL, BY ANY CHANCE? - DID YOU SEE ME ON THE SUPER
BOWL, BY ANY CHANCE? - NO, I DON'T WATCH
THE SUPER BOWL. - OH, I NAILED IT.
- I NAILED IT. - IT WAS SO GOOD.
- IT WAS SO GOOD. - SO, SO GOOD.
- SO, SO GOOD. - [singing] OH, YEAH, YEAH
- [singing] OH, YEAH, YEAH - OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH
- OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH - ANYWAY.
- ANYWAY. - WHY DID YOU GO
ON THE SUPER BOWL? - WHY DID I GO
ON THE SUPER BOWL? - WHY DID I GO ON THE SUPER
BOWL? - WHAT WERE YOU DOING ON--
WHAT DID YOU DO? - I SANG. - I MEAN, I'M NOT FAMILIAR
WITH IT. - OH, I SANG. - I THOUGHT IT WAS
JUST FOOTBALL. - OH, OKAY.
- YEAH, NO, I DIDN'T PLAY. - NO, I DIDN'T PLAY. - I JUST--I SANG.
- I SANG. - OH, OKAY. - I'M BRUNO MARS.
I DON'T HAVE A FRAGRANCE. YOU DON'T KNOW ME 'CAUSE I DON'T
HAVE A FRAGRANCE. - I'M BRUNO MARS.
I DON'T HAVE A FRAGRANCE. THAT'S PROBABLY WHY YOU DON'T
KNOW ME. - OH. - YOU KNOW WHAT HURTS THE MOST? WHEN I GO BEEP, BEEP, BEEP,
BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP. - YOU KNOW WHAT HURTS THE MOST? IS WHEN I GO BEEP, BEEP, BEEP,
BEEP. - LIKE A TRUCK BACKING UP.
- LIKE, BEEP, BEEP. IT'S LIKE A TRUCK BACKING UP. - BACK UP WHEN YOU DO THAT.
STAND UP AND BACK UP. - IT'S LIKE WHEN I'M GOING
BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP. - YEAH. [cheers and applause] - AND, ALSO, IT HURTS WHEN I GO,
KA-KA! - IT HURTS WHEN I GO... [caws] [audience laughter] - OKAY, HOW LONG AGO
DID THIS START? - UM, LIKE,
AROUND THE SUPER BOWL TIME. - LIKE,
AROUND THE SUPER BOWL TIME. - JUST SUPER BOWL? - YEAH.
- AFTER THAT. AFTER YOU ATE A CHIP? - YES.
- YES. - HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR DOCTOR
AFTER THAT? - I DON'T HAVE A DOCTOR.
- I DON'T HAVE A DOCTOR. - OKAY. YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE DOCTOR
BEFORE? - NOPE.
- NOPE. - START CRYING. - MAYBE IT'S TIME TO...
- [sniffles] - CRY. JUST... - [sniffling] [audience laughter] - OH, IT HURTS SO BAD. - [crying]
IT HURTS SO BAD. - RAMON IS SAD.
RAMON IS SAD. - [crying]
RAMON IS SAD. - I'M SORRY. - OKAY, YOU CAN START
FEELING BETTER NOW. - AH, I FEEL BETTER. - EVERYTHING'S FINE? - [sighs] - [laughs] - YOU DON'T HAVE ANY PAIN? - NO, I'M COMPLETELY FINE. - I'M COMPLETELY FINE.
- IT'S WEIRD. - IT'S WEIRD.
- WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME? WHAT DID YOU DO?
- WHAT DID YOU DO? - NOTHING. - YOU'RE SO GOOD.
- YOU'RE SO GOOD. - YOU'RE SO GOOD.
- YOU'RE SO GOOD. YOU'RE GOOD. YOU...
- YOU ARE GOOD. GOOD, GOOD, GOOD, GOOD. - YOU ARE GOOD. - GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.
- GOOD, GOOD, GOOD, GOOD. GOOD, GOOD. - YOU ARE GOOD.
- YOU'RE GOOD. - THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
- THANK YOU. - THANKS FOR BEING HERE.
- THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE. - NO PROBLEM.
I'M GLAD YOU'RE FEELING BETTER. - OKAY.
- OKAY. - I'M HERE, ACTUALLY--
YOU KNOW THE SHOW, RIGHT? "THE ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW"?
- IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE? - YOU KNOW "THE ELLEN DEGENERES
SHOW," RIGHT? - YEAH.
- YEAH. - YEAH.
- WELL, YOU'RE ON IT RIGHT NOW. - YEAH.
- WELL, YOU'RE ON IT RIGHT NOW. - THERE'S CAMERAS IN HERE.
- THERE'S CAMERAS HERE. HERE, HERE, HERE. - SHE WAS TELLING ME
WHAT TO SAY. - AND SHE WAS TELLING ME
WHAT TO SAY. [laughter] SAY HI TO EVERYBODY
AT HOME. SAY HI TO EVERYBODY AT HOME. YOU GOT TO SAY HI TO EVERYBODY
AT HOME. WASN'T SHE GREAT? - WE'LL BE BACK.
Imagine if they never told the nurse it was a prank. She'd just live the rest of her life thinking Bruno is such a weirdo.
I'm not crazy about his music, but he's a good sport and likable.
Is it possible to dislike this guy right now? Damn near everything he does is so great and he seems very genuine
I will call him Ramon from now on
This is genius. I'm not a talk show kind of person, but this show really makes me laugh every time I watch clips.
Ellen is just the best
Fantastic