Ego vs Honesty: My Everest Story | Adrian Ballinger | TEDxSouthLakeTahoe

ego a person's sense of self-esteem or self-importance or ego the main reason that I am better than you now why am i starting this talk tonight about this beautiful iconic and powerful place Mount Everest with definitions of ego well the tie-in between Everest and ego it's me that's me pretty nice photo right so this photo is my climbing partner slash National Geographic photographers most liked photo on Instagram ever thirty one thousand two hundred and one likes last time I checked about twenty-seven minutes ago not bad right that's me and my world the world of climbing the world's tallest mountains and helping others to reach those Heights as well it's a world it's an easy place for your ego to expand you stand on top of the highest points on earth you help other people to do the same for the last ten years I've chosen my stage to be Mount Everest the most visible of climbing locations and in those ten years I've summited seven times and helped 52 others to reach that summit as well while around me every year 10 to 20 climbers lose their lives based on their decision making I was married once there was a long time ago it didn't work out so well maybe this slideshow will give you just a little sense of why that might have been but I have my wedding my new father-in-law gave a toast and he was a great speaker and he opened that toast with this quote I'm not sure he was too convinced about his daughter's choice in a life partner he said what's the difference between a mountain guide and God God doesn't think he's a mountain guide so right there that's why you need to notice that one took a moment you're tired I got it right there that gives you a little sense of the perspective the mountain guides often have and I was lucky for the past ten years as well as guiding others to the tops of these tall tall mountains my visibility also grew as a professional athlete as a professional climber and skier I chose objectives in the Himalaya to test myself on in 2011 I am my two Sherpa teammates became the only people so far to summit three 8,000 meter peaks in less than one month I became the only person to ski the eighth tallest mountain in the world mana slew from his true summit I became the only American to have skied three 8,000 meter peaks from their summits of course I had the hot blonde professional famous climber ten years younger than me as a girlfriend no cliches for me and big-name sponsors started doing major ad campaigns with my expeditions first Apple then Porsche then avid pharmaceuticals Samsung CBS this morning actually called my partner Cory and me the kings of the mountain an ESPN decided for the first time to feature climbing on its show Sports Centre during a one-hour special of our expedition calling it Everest no filter and on our chosen social media platform snapchat yep snapchat we ended up on expeditions having millions of daily views hundreds of thousands of daily comments and snaps sent back to us and that makes sense it makes sense because we were doing super important things on snapchat things like this I almost forgot the hair by Everest competition so I took my hat off I think I'm crushing the quarry right now you can't beat this hair by ever saving ballinger you can't I'm gross I'm grosser than you I'm grosser than you'll ever be yuck he is gross so by 2016 I was in the lucky position that I could I could suggest any project I wanted in the mountains and be very confident that I could get funding to go and do that climb and so I decided I wanted to return to Mount Everest but this time I wanted to climb it without supplemental oxygen there's been a little over 7,000 a sense of the mountain with supplemental oxygen and all of mine up to 2016 were with that bottled oxygen there's been less than 200 ascents without supplemental oxygen and over 90% of people who tried failed I chose Cory Richards as my partner he was a strong competent capable alpinist and importantly a National Geographic photographer so for the next few minutes it's just one thing you need to remember any incredible beautiful iconic photo you saw Cory's any photo a little bit blurry maybe a finger in front of the lens this guy here's your first example definitely a Corey photo and the process of climbing Everest without supplemental oxygen it's a long and painful one not only at home for the months before the trip where your training and fundraising but also on the mountain itself it takes at least two and a half months to climb Mount Everest without oxygen and that time it's not just going from the bottom from base camp to the summit right that takes about six days if I just walked out of my tent at base camp went to the summit six days but we'd all die if we tried to do that we need to do what's called acclimatizing we need to build more red blood cells to make our cardiovascular system more efficient and the only way to build those red blood cells is to climb up as high as our bodies can survive spend as much time there just suffering through it as we can that cause our body to release hormones to build more red blood cells but then we need to descend back down the mountain to an altitude where a body can actually make Changez and then we do it over and over and over again and during those six weeks in 2016 acclimatizing I felt incredible I was strong I was a fastest climber on the mountain I was out with the Sherpa fixing ropes carrying loads always in front leading and really that's been my career on the mountain and in the big mountains always in front always the fastest looking down on my teammates below men until I reached 27,000 feet camp for just 2,000 feet from the summit of Mount Everest from this dream I had had since I was 14 years old with millions of eyes watching us through social media and our other media partners I reached 27,000 feet and I couldn't get my body warm we spent about four hours in a tent there not sleeping just resting and hydrating and even inside a sleeping bag and my down jacket I just couldn't stop shivering I still left camp with chlorine at 10:00 p.m. as we had planned in our only possible summit window and started climbing but immediately Korey started pulling away from me I saw I was like disappearing in the distance as I got slower and slower shivering by 5:00 a.m. I've been shivering uncontrollably for hours and I couldn't feel my hands to behind my wrists that meant a couple of things number one it meant I couldn't work my radio and anymore number two and then I could no longer clip a device into the fixed line the Rope that's meant to keep us connected to the mountain as we're nauseous and dizzy and exhausted from the altitude with 9,000 feet dropping down on this side on this knife-edged Ridge down to Tibet and 4,000 feet dropping down this side to Nepal at 5:00 a.m. I made the decision to turn around Cory continued his quest and is 6:34 a.m. on May 24 2016 he stood on top of Mount Everest for his first time without supplemental oxygen meanwhile I returned to camp four and put on our rescue oxygen hoping to save my fingers and not lose them to frostbite and I'd love to tell you that once I descended to base camp I immediately began analyzing my failure what went wrong but it didn't work out that way I had sponsors I didn't want to lose I had fans I didn't want to disappoint I had professional climbers to compare myself to including Cory's standing right next to me who had summited on the exact same day that I had turned around so as we left the mountain and headed straight to New York City for three days of media and interviews the story I created was one to protect my ego by the time I hit New York an interview after interview I actually became the hero of this story I turned my failure into success I was shivering my hands were numb I was above 28,000 feet soloing I turned around so I didn't become a statistic on the mountain I didn't die up there and not only that my turning around is what enabled Cory to go to the summit because he didn't have to turn around and rescue me on the Charlie Rose show we got we got to share the stage with General David Patraeus and he loved the story he actually told me Cory's job was the easy one yours was the hard one you showed discipline and I liked that my ego like that it felt good but here's the thing the story I just told you it wasn't true here's what really happened between 25,000 feet and 27,000 feet on the mountain between camp 3 and camp 4 getting to that last camp before we'd make our summit push my speed exponentially flows at those altitudes as the pain becomes so much greater and I'm trying to manage it meanwhile Cory it's hard to describe it's like claw read into a phone booth rips off his Clark Kent glasses throws on his cape and steps back out a superhero he just doesn't slow down like I do and like the rest of us do and it doesn't really matter whether the weather that's because of genetics or because of his incredible ability to suffer it's true it's incredible what matters is I couldn't handle it my ego couldn't handle watching this story that I've always told myself flip all of a sudden I wasn't the strongest climber on the mountain Cory was stronger glory was faster and so on that day what I did I decided I had to keep up I poured everything into staying up with Cory getting to 27,000 feet all of my energy all of my willpower and you know what I arrived at 27,000 feet camp for fried on Cory's heels I had done it I had made it to 27,000 feet but Mount Everest is 29,000 feet tall and I had nothing left that's why I couldn't rewarm that's why I couldn't stop shivering I basically had this massive bonk just like you might in a race or a run at home except I had done it at 27,000 feet and Mount Everest doesn't give you second chances you can't recover from that I had nothing left to give I'm standing here tonight in the red circle I'd love to tell you that I came up with that self-analysis myself I'm that self-aware that I figured out this issue but that too would be a story the truth is the credit goes to Emily Harrington my girlfriend who's here tonight somewhere Emily is also a professional climber but she's never done the whole storytelling for ego thing a social media in person in slideshows she's incredibly honest and open and vulnerable she's also got a pretty interesting relationship with Everest which she's also climbed we actually met on Everest in 2012 she calls Everest Steve because she tries to help she really has a clear sense of perspective of what the mountain is and isn't and it is taken so much of my time and of my relation ship with everything else in my life to pour into Steve so for the next few minutes we're gonna call Mount Everest II I think it'll help Emily helped me work through that I needed to figure out what my weaknesses were why I hadn't stood on the summit why I had turned around and I went to a sports performance lab to start in the middle of the summer of 2016 to try to figure out my weaknesses it took them all of about three hours of testing to show me exactly how weak I was as an endurance athlete and very specific areas that I could work on to improve if I hired your coach if I hired a nutritionist if I sucked it up and was willing to be weak to get stronger that process of training combined with me really trying to get a hold of this perspective to keep my ego in check and my father really helps with this as well he reminds me on a semi-regular basis and my sister who teaches special needs students in some of the hardest school districts in the country can barely pay her bills and gets near no recognition meanwhile I walk up hills for a living and get to be on national TV and he's right I get paid to walk uphill I get paid to walk uphill really slowly really really slowly that clip this clip this was taken as I was moving in 2017 when I returned to the mountain with cord this was taken getting to 27,000 feet and this day for me moving to this camp it was as hard as any day on the mountain once again chlorine turned into a superhero and took off once again all I wanted to do was follow him and keep up but I didn't I held back I remembered what Emily's told me well my dad's told me keep it in perspective I slowed down I made it to camp four and I wasn't wasted it's 10:30 p.m. like I get to sleep a little bit more cuz he's faster than me having a coffee wait for you guys I'm about to take a step here gotta happen there it is it's riveting TV right I have 43 hours of this footage so if anyone wants to check it out later let me know the wild thing about this final push the last three hours to the summit I remember almost none of it that's one of the things about climbing this high without oxygen I can tell you this last section three hours of climbing I probably went for about this red circle right here to the doors at the front of the auditorium that we walked in and the one thing I do remember is Cory Richards he actually put oxygen on so he could slow down stay warm enough and go at my pace and he just kept encouraging me on and on and on until finally May 27th 1053 a.m. 2017 I stood on the summit of Steve without supplemental oxygen thank and and this is where I want to end my show right you guys just applauded that was awesome I'm the hero it feels good but you deserve one more slide one more picture after the summit and it's this one Oh summit day ended up being 43 hours long to get up and back down and this photo was taken about 28,000 700 feet that's me on a ladder massive exposure behind me sound asleep yep asleep and this is the truth of my expedition I made the summit it took every bit of energy I had every bit of will I had but that wasn't enough it took more it took my teammates I don't know if I would have gotten down back off the mountain without them they kept waking me up kept pushing me kept encouraging me to continue down and down and down and that's the truth honesty it's something I find so hard it's hard on social media it's hard when people are watching it's hardest for me to myself but I truly believe the reason I stood on top of Steve without supplemental oxygen it's because of my honesty it's this simple simple concept we learn as kid just tell the truth I believe that concept will help each of us to achieve some of our greatest dreams and my ego it's just gonna have to deal with it thank you

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 75,599

Rating: 4.2861805 out of 5

Keywords: TEDxTalks, English, Life, Achievement, Adventure, Behavior, Extreme Sports, Health, Learning, Passion, Social Interaction, Struggle

Id: st45xOABhuk

Length: 19min 6sec (1146 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 03 2018