Drew Carey's Improv-a-Ganza - Ep. 34

from the panelists Hollywood Theater at the MGM Grand Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas Nevada it's drew carey's in chroma Gansa starring Jeff DeVos Bob jerk-ass chef esta Kathy Kinney Colin Mochrie Brad Sherwood and your host Drew Carey welcome to the MGM Grand Duke Carrie's improv again so let's get the show started shall we let's go I'm just gonna go to the audience here just cuz uh no tired of being on stage hi how are you what a lovely looking audience hi hey how are you come on up with me and um we have a seat here for our lovely lady oh it blends in with the stage hello let's get the with a short skirt on a nice high stool and I didn't plan that well there's a whole different show going on in the first up well oh hi how are you what's your name Christy Christy is that Swedish yes it is oh thank you um I will guess the nationality of any name in the audience all right Christy nice to have you here and what do you do for a living well I'm brand new back in the workforce I'm actually I was a mom my husband and I have four children that we had in five minutes well done yeah you look great thank you I would just be swearing and my ass would be around my ankles um quiet uh of course motherhood is a very important job but what is it you do your back doing I'm uh connecting people with jobs oh all right so uh legitimate ones well done what's your husband's name Jack what is it that first attracts you to a man I like handsome men all right and anything less shallow I love bald man I'm a bald man I love you then if you could do anything in the world say the kids are grown up you're healthy you have lots of money you can do anything you and Jack what would you like to do you know I always wonder what do you call the coyote ugly girls I also wish that I could have done mad you want it to be a coyote this is your dream once the kids are in college you want it to be a coyote ugly girl well what's gonna happen is these three lovely gentlemen are going to serenade you with a song based on all the information you have just given us and guys since there's a three of you it to me it just screams out that this song should be a doo-wop Oh Christy is so strong I hear you had four children in just five minutes five minutes eight long now well you have four children that is what you say and if you could have them on five minutes I guess there was no foreplay Oh Christy Oh Christy I'm so in love with you job placement I have a job I'd like to do with you in my basement you and me cut you know who knows I like to cease women Oh Christy you move so fast when it was time to have that family at last you were so quick you know just what I mean it's just five minutes almost a basketball team just fine you give me five minutes how did you die I know that you could have more fun your loving your little fat for Christie Christie you're a star I'd like to see you in faded jeans I do Oh Oh Christy we know that you give a job and we would like to steal one because the kind you jobs you give unlike ours they're a real one I'd love to see you get in the barn poor drinking dance and I'm sure that tonight you probably wish that you had worn some peg pants really make it Chris I'm glad we got the food order out of the way what do I need right now is a couple who's very much in love and it raise your hands if you're a couple that's very in love right now huh a couple of couple in love couple in love oh right over here what are your names Matt and Matt and Sharon come join me on stage everybody met and Sharon all right this is one of my favorite games of all time this game is called first dates Matt and Sharon sit over here if you would Matt park it right there Sharon right there Cathy and Drew Carey are going to portray a reenactment of your first date so start off where did you guys first meet at a Mexican restaurant at you met at a Mexican restaurant by accident you'd never met before no we met online in it you met online and then we met in person how to make so your first associate you agreed to meet at and Mexican restaurant and what was the name of the restaurant can you say el sirs el sirs whose idea was ulcers mine is it's a regular hangout for you it's cheap all right what do you do for a living if you don't mind I'm in the military you're in the middle say what Branch Air Force Air for everything we're Jason last place I was at is Djibouti Africa tell us how the date transpired what was the first thing you thought when you saw him uh-huh how about uniform looks good on him you know you were uniform you old smoothie oldest trick in the book how did the date go um what happened first well you guys left in the parking lot and sorry in the car and because we drove separate right you know cuz in case you didn't work out right you got yeah I can drive Riley yeah and then just kind of take off yes hop in a c-130 and get the hell back to Djibouti exactly you like the hood yeah didn't the beans look like poo but the beans look like poop but that sounds like a nice place else arisen to Sun everybody the beans look like poop they tasty they taste good though they taste good and it's our place we go back there all the time oh good oh so now here's was gonna happen because they don't know you guys very well they're going to make some mistakes are gonna get some things right based on what you've told them they're also gonna say some things that probably aren't right now what they need you to do is whenever they do something that sounds accurate I mean that sounds like Matt or something that sounds like Sharon would say or do you need to let them know by ringing the bell the ringing the bell means they've got it if they're way off the mark and they get something wrong give them a hawk a hunt means no end of the key if they keep trying something else and still wrong honk the horn until they get it right ring the bell so they know and that way they can more accurately depict the first date of Matt and Sharon I'd Sharon its back hi Matt I'm not wearing any clothes me neither I've so enjoyed talking to captain Matt I think it's time we meet with our clothes on well I don't I don't have a lot of money let's go to this cheap brush Mexican restaurant I know and I'm not sure if I'm gonna like her I believe anything you say so let's wait in our cars first I'll tell you what when you get there you text me and if you look handsome I'll get out of the car okay see you there see you there you look alright I don't mind you either you're wearing a uniform you're making me hot already hi Sharon I'm Matt I'm Matt captain that you can call me captain do you mind if I order for us uh go ahead thank you we'll have the poo beans and cheese should be Chagas uh poo beans good choice I'm glad we got the food odor out of the way I'm sorry I only do that online Wow I know I've had cyber sex with you several times I haven't had any cyber sex with you oh my god oh my god Matt what's that bro sub-province up man all right yeah what's good oh my god lucky me my new lady Sharon I've never seen you with a girl before okay I'm sorry we've never met have we no we haven't I was sitting at a table nearby and I couldn't help noticing you're on a first date yes and I have something of a clairvoyant and I can see that this woman is so very much in love with you and hopes one day to me sorry I had the pooh beans I'll be back I was always a popular girl and I'm still a popular woman and I only went on the website because I was curious well I'm not that popular that's why I was on the website to begin with standing there Kings nose-picker what took you so long I'm sorry said the Queen had a bit of a booger the first we're going to start with chip and Brad chip and Brad what's gonna happen is chip and Brad will be in a physical position they will start a scene in that position using those positions at some point someone from the back will yell freeze take the position take the physical position and start an entirely new scene you won't get it at all tonight alright for our Brad uh ma'am do you play any sports yeah what's your favorite sport baseball do something that would make us think of baseball no more yeah all right and I are you sir a letter of the alphabet si BSC and go right uh yeah take the picture all right sir I'm trying to squeeze the shutter button but it seems to me look I can't believe the wind is blowing you away in your beautiful kite costume hold still hold still I know it's tornado season freeze and then I told you if you stayed out late you'd be grounded I'm 84 years old Oh elders ladies I want crazy Quasimoto it's almost 9:30 ring the bell for God's sakes please you're fired Yahtzee thank God I thought you were doing something completely different I am a Yahtzee champion there's no way it will take my title away from me let's try this game then Oh all right I'll get nope I win again wait yeah damn you oh damn you game masters um stop pointing at me I will not have your child send in the king's nose picker what took you so long I'm sorry sir the Queen had a bit of a booger I bet I haven't been able to breathe for a fortnight all right ladies so uh explain this whole birds and bees thing to me again birds get hungry so they need the worm go parakeet get sleep rabbits return parakeet I the only trained hunting parakeet in Overland Highway from Las Vegas I'm Terry Peters cousin Jerry faders how loud we go on listen water why my gummy things the star-spangled banner Oh shake all right I've had enough crease hey guys seriously where's Roosevelt I want you to give me broader shoulders and a nice future I want you to think of a number between one and thirty Richard I want you all right this game is hurry Collin and Kathy and this game is called new choice they're gonna do a scene keep it down they're gonna do a scene right now and whenever I want to I can say new choice and they have to come up with a brand new choice whatever they've just said they must come up with something else until I like what they said and they will use that to propel the scene forward so to start them over you miss what was the least fulfilling job you ever held beautician not fulfilling for you all right I've seen about beauticians the game of new choice Oh make me beautiful you got ten minutes okay uh first could you fill out this questionnaire new choice first can you drink this cocktail new choice I don't think I can do it new choice uh I'm gonna do it this could take me 11 and a half minutes oh that's good I just did it really quick because I'm the Grand Marshal of the Rose Parade new choice I'm the semi mediocre captain of the turnip Guide I've heard of you yeah yeah uh well I have a vision I'm thinking you know we're gonna fluff it up and we're gonna give you some tips and possibly a perm good luck to you okay so if you could just uh we have a new way of dying things you just drink this die new choice okay I can't help my notes you have claw hands yes it's where we'll put anybody's hair here though don't ever mention my claw hands they happened when I was involved in a horrible thresher accident a choice I got my claw hands from a renegade chicken don't ask listen I want you to give me a complete makeover with rosy-cheeked new tourism I want you to give me a broader shoulders and a nice new choice I want you to think of a number between 1 and 30 new toys I want you that was easier than I thought oh wait a minute you were in here last week new choice ok you can have me right here new choice wait a minute nutrition you're my husband jeez Louise I'm trying to make that relationship exciting I'm sure I got the pirate costume now this this role-playing thing is not working I don't know what to do with you anymore losers I know exactly what to do with you Louise new toys candid new choice a choice new choice all of those choices together oh my god new choice epi a new choice I'm in cement

Channel: Nurse Harley299

Views: 212,647

Rating: 4.8780489 out of 5

Keywords: drew carey, funny, humor, comedy, improv, episode, 34, gsn, game show network, drew carey's improv-a-ganza

Id: 9cNhw4oPg3k

Length: 20min 2sec (1202 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 06 2012