Draw My Life | LDShadowLady

hey guys what's up LD tality hair i don't really talk about my life much in my videos but after reaching 1 million subscribers this apart from you all was overwhelming and it finally gave me the confidence to share my story so I put together a collection of significant moments from my life that I think have made me into the person that I am today and created a draw my life video once again thank you for all the support throughout the past few years of my life and I hope you enjoy this video so it all started with two human beings my mum and my dad my dad was a doctor and my mum was a nurse and they fell in love they got married and a few years later my mum thought she had the flu because she was feeling really ill but it turns out she was actually pregnant with me and they gave birth to a little baby girl and they called her Elizabeth and they actually nicknamed me Beth and that's still a name that my family uses for me even though now most people know me as Lizzy they also decided to have another little baby and when that came into the world it turned out to be a girl and it was my little sister Maddy Maddy is just over a year younger than me so we've always been pretty close in age and therefore we were quite close growing up and we were really good friends and we always did stuff together between being born and until the age of about eight or nine I don't really remember much but we did get a cat somewhere along the way so like most people I went to school and in the UK the first school that you go to is called primary school and you go there until you're about 11 years old I didn't really like school much so I used to pretend to be ill a lot of the time and sometimes people would actually believe me and I would get to stay home and stay in bed and watch TV all day I made some really great friends when I was younger called Emma Sophie and Jade and Jade was really really tall and of course I hung out a lot with my sister Maddy as well and we were all one big group of friends and we always had sleepovers but instead of pillow fights and talking about boys we used to play video games and make movies together and I still have some of them on video tapes now and really embarrassing so growing up I always knew that my mom was a little bit weird she was always really eccentric and her behavior was a little bit unusual but that was something that I loved about her however my parents used to argue a lot there would be shouting and crying and screaming and this happened a couple of times a week and really late into the night so it would keep my sister and I awake all through the night on school nights sometimes my mom even threatened to run away from home and that would always really scare us because we thought it was true at the time we were too young to really understand and we didn't know what it meant but the reason for her behavior was because she was an alcoholic but I didn't really know what it was like to have a mom that wasn't an alcoholic so it was kind of just normal to me and I thought everyone had a family that was like this so life went on so when I was about 11 I took an exam called the 11 plus and that test did whether I was smart enough to go to a grammar school and at first I really didn't actually want to go to the grammar school because none of my friends from primary school were going and they had a really dorky uniform compared to all the other schools but looking back I'm really glad that my dad encouraged me to go there because I got really good grades and it was a really nice school there wasn't a lot of bullying even though I was kind of a late bloomer and I always considered myself to be ugly in school I was never bullied for it throughout my years in school I was always really shy and I would hardly ever bring friends home because my house was such a mess that would be plates piled up in the kitchen and mess all over the floor and it was really really disgusting so my mom would just usually drink a lot throughout the day and then sleep so most of the time she was always asleep and my dad was always at work so my sister and I would just kind of left alone to do whatever we wanted to do but we were also kind of sensible about it and I think that's one of the reasons why I'm so independent is because I always have been but since there wasn't much to do and my life kind of sucked I used to escape from reality by playing video games and going on the Internet then I used to play a lot of ecology to the Sims rollercoaster tycoon and I used to play on a website called Gaia online where you create a character and earn money and you post on forums and I just loved being part of the online community so about half way through high school my dad moved out from our family home into a small home on his own shortly followed by my sister who moved in with him which left me alone with my mum I didn't mind because I wanted to stay home and look after my mum coz she wasn't really able to look after herself anymore she didn't cook and clean up after herself so I had to do that for her and she would have a lot of accidents because of her drinking she would often fall over a lot at home and sometimes she would go out in public and she would hurt herself there and quite a few times she had to have an ambulance called for her because she hurt herself quite badly so that was always really scary and I got a bit of paranoia about her leaving the house all the time I always thought that she would hurt herself and not come back I finished high school when I completed my GCSE and I did pretty well I got some a stars A's and B's which was pretty good considering that I spent most of my revision time playing Call of Duty 4 but I decided to go to a new college where I didn't really know anyone and it turned out to be great I made a load of new friends and it was a completely different world from the grammar school that I'd been to during this time I kind of came out of my shell and I became a little more confident because I got braces which started out my teeth which I was really self-conscious about and I found my style how I wanted to dress and how I wanted to style my hair my new friends were really into partying so I actually went through a party phase and I used to go out almost every week with my friends to a house party but after a while I got a little bit bored of all the partying and I settled back down into playing games on my Friday and Saturday nights instead I also decided to get a job at Toys R Us my dad me that I didn't need to get a job because he was a doctor so he could give me money instead but I just wanted to get one anyway because I wanted to earn my own money and get some work experience and I enjoyed it so I'm glad I did it meanwhile at home my mom would have good days and bad days she started falling over and hang herself more often but she ended up trying to get help and going to rehab a couple of times which always got my hopes up that she might stop drinking but it was also really bad for her because she would have withdrawal seizures which meant that she would have an epileptic seizure because she was suffering from withdrawal symptoms from the lack of alcohol and they were equally as scary as her falling over drunk and getting hurt and I think they scared her too because then she would just start drinking again now you might have noticed that I haven't really mentioned romance at all up until this point and that is because I did not really like the idea of a relationship there were a couple of guys I liked in college but the idea of intimacy and actually being in a relationship with them really freaked me out and I just was not ready for it during college I started off my YouTube channel and I played a lot of Call of Duty did some vlogs and I started playing Minecraft sadly around this time the cat that I'd had since I was really young went missing and he never came back I didn't really expect it to hit me as hard as it did but I was really sad my cat was something that was always there and always consistent every single day even with all the changes that were going on around my life with my dad moving out and me changing as a person my cat was always still there always the same and I found that really reassuring and when he was gone I felt like I lost a big part of me and it took a long time to get over it but time heals all and I'm now at peace with his passing and I'm just happy that I had him in my life for as long as I did so when I finished college I didn't really know what to do with my life I've heard about this summer program at Disneyland where you basically go and work there for a year in between college and university so that was what I wanted to do however I did not get the job so now I had a year before starting University and I didn't really know what to do so I just continued with my hobby which was my youtube channel as my youtube channel started to grow and I made my friends in the YouTube community I decided to go to a convention called game fest with some of them and there was a huge group of youtubers there some of them I knew and some of them I didn't and one of the youtubers that was there that I didn't already know was called smallish beans I was drawn to him and I decided to spend the whole day with him and we went round the entire convention trying to collect as many free things as we could from the different stalls I thought that he was cute funny kind and he had the same interest as me however he was not single his heart belonged to another but he was really cool and he seemed like someone that I wanted to be friends with anyway so we exchanged contact info and we both went home to our separate lives but pretty much as soon as we both got home we started talking to each other on skype and we would talk every night until the early hours of the morning about anything and everything I would have all these inside jokes and we became really really really really really good friends so since I was on my gap year I actually decided to spend some of my time traveling so I flew to America to live in Alexandria Virginia with my aunt and uncle and their children and it was actually kind of lonely because I didn't have any friends there so I talked a lot to my online friends that I had been making YouTube videos with and I also talked a lot to Joel who was back in England again even with the time differences we used to stay awake all night talking to each other and after a while I started to develop feelings for him and I really really liked him I felt like if I didn't tell him sooner rather than later then I would never have my chance with him ever again and I just had to try it and see what happened but unfortunately he rejected me because he didn't want to mess up the relationship that he already had with his current girlfriend now obviously I was devastated by this he was the only guy that I'd ever like I really wanted to have a relationship with so I was really sad but my friend Ali started to teach me how to play World of Warcraft which is an MMO RPG game and I became a blood elf hunter because I was so upset by the recent rejection I got really immersed into the game and I played it a lot and I brought the obsession back home with me to the UK I still remained friends with Joel all this time and a few weeks after I got home back to England Joel's girlfriend dumped him and he became a single Pringle but he told me that he actually liked me and we decided to try dating and it went well whilst I was away my sister had been living with my mum to take care of her so when I came back the three of us all lived together my mom was still really difficult to live with but at least this time I had my sister to help me through it and I also had the help of YouTube which was my hobby at the time and it was very rewarding to have people appreciate the videos that I made and that really helped to cheer me up and I also had Joel to keep me happy and cheer me up after a while my dad decided to move back into the big family home with me and my sister and my mom moved out to a smaller bungalow on her own but very shortly after my sister and I both went off to university for three years I went to go study computer animation and visualisation in Liverpool I actually really disliked University and I had a really miserable time I didn't really like the cost that I was on and I hated living with flatmates who kept the kitchen really dirty I wasn't really interested in a lot of the partying that my classmates were doing so instead I focused my time on my hobby of doing YouTube and I made more videos more often by the end of my time at university I had almost a million subscribers and I graduated with an upper second-class degree I'm really happy with where my life is at the moment and I even fulfilled my life goal of getting a cat but even though quite a few bad things have happened to me in the past I think that they have played a big part in making me who I am today I just hope they're any of you guys are going through a tough time in your own life then my story will help you to see that you can overcome it and become a stronger person at the end because of it and I hope that you will get the happy ending that you deserve

Channel: LDShadowLady

Views: 13,096,186

Keywords: ldshadowlady, funny, walkthrough, draw my life, draw, my, life, lizzie, sad, story, such, cry

Id: f4ruioYbQiQ

Length: 13min 2sec (782 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 19 2015