Dave Is Going To Fight Tucker Carlson | Letterman

hi I'm Barbara gain this the Barbara Gaines show  this is Mary Barclay this is Dave Letterman hi   Barbara hi Mary good to see everybody hi hi great  to be back are you okay there dud well you know   it's the dumbest thing and I'm telling you my  life is one dumb thing after another I'm just   that guy I I don't know what I did but I hurt  my shoulder so I'm driving into the city today   yeah I see this big sign shoulder work ahead and  I thought I'm stupid if I don't go in and get it   worked on so I get out of the car and the guy said  what are you doing I said I don't know I is it   maybe Frozen and then he hit me with aing shovel  did it fix did it fix it no it made it much worse   oh you know what was great news the other day did  you kids see this I know you did I in the morning   I get up and have a little coffee and I scan the  headlines sure that's what you do you get a like   an actual newspaper or like the wish it was an  actual newspaper they don't make those anymore   no I feel like they do still make the New York  Times is in business but I only get the times on   the weekends and it's so heavy on the weekends I  can't really bring it up to the house that's how I   hurt my shoulder exactly right good uh a couple of  weeks ago and this was the best news of the week   Michelle bunin was seen in Brazil oh kissing her  boyfriend uh some Judo instructor yeah and that   was the like the big new yeah and I just thought  oh the world is great it we're all back to normal   her boyfriend I don't know an area publication  she her boyfriend is a judo instructor and for   the life of me how many in the world there's 8  billion people in the world honestly how many   raise your hand if you're a judo instructor what  is that like four guys well anyway I was so happy   that she's in love with the Judo instructor but  I bet he's hot she's hot I bet he's to be hot I   mean Judo is where you go for heat well I'm very  excited I have some special announcement to make   I have finalized a deal to fight Tucker Carlson  yay that's fantastic let me give you a little   backstory on this I I do my own research and what  I have come to understand about Tucker Carlson uh   he's he's being uh silly he goly he's being he  goes over there pretends oh I'm Mr journalist   I'm going to go over and talk to Putin and he's  over and then we see him shopping in a Moscow   grocery store and he's holding up melons oh look  at these Russian melons you don't get melons like   these in the United States it's he's pretending  it's all an act he's just doing this because uh   if you're a contrarian as is Tucker you make the  money that's where you make the money look at us   for example we're not making [ __ ] no we just  try to get along but Tucker he's a showman right   and and he knows it and he knows that I Know It  uh so what what I've decided to do to prove that   it's all an act with Tucker he and I are going to  fight and uh I will fight him anywhere he wants   I'll come to his house we'll get a hotel and fight  I don't care he can come here and we'll fight like   an actual fist fight not like a fight of words no  no no good Lord no no this is going to be fun now   I will tell you in my lifetime I've been in three  fist fights I've lost uh all three I'm prepared   to get beaten silly because look at me I don't  know what I'm do but you're throwing out this   challenge it's all said it's we just got to have  the paperwork signed but he's I'm waiting for him   to call back uh but he has to beat me unconscious  oh that's that shows the end what does he get out   of this what does Tucker get out of this he he  uh well he gets a little publicity a little he   gets the publicity of beating me to unconscious  uh and who wouldn't want that on their resume   so anyway that's going to happen and I and I hope  we're going to cover it here and he he'll cover it   up it'll be simal cast on X so don't worry about  me I'll be okay uh but when you when you see my   lifeless body doesn't sound okay bleeding on the  on the floor or the table or the couch wherever a   Tucker has beating the crap out of me don't worry  I'll be fine I'm very excited about this this is   I'd like you to be Tucker personally I can't look  first of all I'm twice his age he's he's fit he   he look soft I'm telling you get one punch he has  a boyish charm but I by by agreeing to this fight   he is he is announcing to the world yet again that  he's just making this stuff up nobody thinks the   way if you can describe his thought that he  presents himself uh and this is this is Grand   it'll be good for him and good for me and he'll go  back to hosting game shows no money involved and   and the fight will last until I'm unconscious all  right uh I guess that's what we have today pretty   good show today fantastic yeah don't forget to  snash it's too late it's too late supp do that   at the top you put no thought into this do you  no very little it's a freefor all it's easy Brey   loose thanks thanks for watching we'll see you  goodbye next time you see me I'll be lifeless   on the floor Fight Club that'll be too bad for  everyone yeah all right then talk show Fight Club right

Channel: Letterman

Views: 87,784

Keywords: letterman, david letterman, dave letterman, interview, letterman interview, letterman official, letterman late show, letterman late night, late night, stupid pet tricks, stupid human tricks, top ten, late show, top ten list

Id: XL6QPI8oQOU

Length: 5min 40sec (340 seconds)

Published: Wed Feb 28 2024