Life is a manifestation of where you direct your energy. It truly is. And what we should really start with is to actually look at energy the same way we look at water if I took a water in can and I watered a garden bed will the weeds grow or the flowers grow? Both, right? Water has no ability to discriminate between the weeds and the flowers Whatever I water starts grow. Energy is the same way as well. If I took energy and I invested it into something negative it will grow and become more negative. If I took energy invested it into something positive it will grow and become more positive. Energy has no ability to discriminate between what's positive and what's negative. Whatever you invest energy into starts to grow and manifest in your life. Right now you are the sum total of where you've been investing your energy throughout your entire life So the goal early in life is to figure out what it is you want, right? What's your purpose in life? Who and what's important your life and be able to direct energy towards that so that you can manifest that in your life. So, where do we begin with this? We begin by understanding how the mind works. I'll have to say with you after living 10 years. It's a celibate monk in a cloistered monastery in Hawaii This was probably the most important thing I could ever share with you understanding how the mind works. From a monk's perspective of understanding a monk and experience with the .. ugh Monks perspective of understanding the mind and experience of the mind in my perspective in my experience of the mind There are two things we need to understand awareness and the mind. Let's define what they are. Let's define awareness as a glowing ball of light. So we imagine an orb a glowing ball of light that can float around Let's call that awareness and put that aside now. Let's define the mind Let's define the - a vast space with many different areas within it one area of the mind is angry Hatred jealousy joy happiness sex food art science technology whole bunch of different things, right? Your awareness, that ball of light can actually move to any area of the mind you want it to go to so if your awareness this glowing Ball of light goes to the happy area of the mind it lights up that particular area of the mind you become You become conscious of being happy Are you? No, you're in an area of the mind call happiness If this ball of light goes to the angry area of the mind it lights up that particular area of the mind Are you angry? No, you're in an area of the mind called anger And by using your willpower and your powers of concentration you can actually take your awareness, this ball of light, to any area of the mind that you want to go to. And here's the most important part where your awareness goes, that's where your energy is flowing So if your awareness goes to the angry area of the mind your energy is flowing there It's actually strengthening that particular area of the mind. So this is a theory of it So let's do a little practical exercise to see if this actually works or just some monk talk Okay, so for that, I need some audience participation. I need all of you to sit up straight in your chair. Okay? And put your feet down on the ground and if you're leaning back in your chair sit forward a little bit Keep your spine straight roll your shoulders back and keep your head nicely balanced on top of your spine Your eyes are closed. Don't worry, we're not gonna chant or hold hands until later. Just kidding So take a slow deep breath in with your eyes closed take a slow deep breath in slowly exhale And take another slow deep breath in again. And then slowly exhale. I want you to become aware of the chair that you're sitting on. Is it comfortable is it not comfortable? The temperature of the room..? Is it cold..? Warm? What about your body posture is your spine straight? Your shoulders roll back? You're sitting a little bit forward? Your head nicely balanced on top of your spine? Now I want you to become aware of the most recent wedding that you attended. Do you remember whose wedding it is? Were you happy for the couple getting married Try and think as much detail as you can about the wedding. Do you remember what you wore to the wedding? Do you remember what the bride wore. Did she make a good choice with her dress? How was the food of the wedding? Alcohol did you drink a lot? Was there good music? Did you dance? Did you do some crazy wedding dance? Now I want you to become aware of the most recent vacation that you went on What kind of vacation was it? Was it a surfing trip yoga retreat holiday shopping camping backpacking Try and think as much detail as you can about the vacation What was the weather like where you went? Was it cold? Rainy? Hot? Humid? Dry? Snowing? Do you remember the favorite hotel you stayed in? How was the food? Bland? Spicy? Did you get sick eating the food? Did you shop a lot? What was one thing you bought on the trip that you really liked? Your eyes are still closed. I want you to become aware of the room again Try and feel the temperature of the room. Is it warm? Is it cold? The chair you're sitting on is it comfortable? Is it not? Is your spine still straight? Are you hunching? Are your shoulders rolled back? Okay, slowly open your eyes and you can lean back in your chair Thank you very much for doing that exercise with me. That exercise is really to prove two things to you. One is there's a clear separation between awareness and the mind. Two completely different things. Second is you can actually take your awareness and move it to any area of the mind you want it to go to Well, you gave me permission to do it. So I took your awareness from the room I took it to an area of the subconscious mind where the memory of the wedding resided and then I took you to the vacation area of the mind and then back to the room again. How do I know you were thinking about the wedding? Well, I had my eyes open and your eyes were closed and when I asked questions I could see the reactions in your face. Did the bride make a good choice with a headdress a couple of you went .. Okay Did you drink too much a few heads went down? so I knew you were thinking about the wedding, right? So I took your awareness into different areas in the mind. This happens all day. All day we allow people and things around us to dictate where awareness goes in our mind Let's do one little exercise again just to emphasize this point because to me this is really really important. And it's the crux of really managing energy in your life Can you remember your first kiss? Do you remember who it was? Do you remember his or her name? Do you remember where it took place? Back at dad's car? Behind the garage? What was the experience? What was the emotion that was associated with that experience? And if you really think about it, it wasn't that long ago. Were you embarrassed? Were you nervous? Do you remember? Do you remember the person's name? Okay, some people are laughing blushing Did you remember the first time someone you loved someone really close to you passed away? Do you remember that remember getting a phone call being told that this person that you love has just died How did you feel? What was the emotion associated with that experience? Did you have the blessing of being able to see the body before it was cremated or buried Do you remember standing next to the body wondering how it felt knowing that you'll never see this person again How did it feel for you? Do you remember the emotions? Isn't it interesting? In the space of 60 to 90 seconds I took your awareness from an area of the mind where all of you is smiling or giggling or slightly embarrassed to an area of the mind where all of you are completely sad. Or not sad, but just feeling.. The vibration of the room since has completely changed Right? And I could take your awareness now to the angry area of the mind where you all get angry and you get up and you leave And Sarah and a team would be really upset with me and And this happens all day right? All day we allow people and things to dictate where our awareness goes. And because they dictate where our wellness goes That's where our energy flows as well and where our energy flows is what manifests in our life So really the goal in life is not really to control your mind But rather to control where your awareness is going in within your mind So don't control your mind control where your awareness goes within your mind. How do we do that? We do that by learning how so your spiritual practice or your homework for taking away is to control where your awareness goes in your mind throughout the day and that's really it. How do we do this? We learn the fine art of concentration First let's define what concentration is. I define concentration as the ability to keep your awareness on one thing for an extended period of time so if I can keep my awareness on this lady and hold it on her, I'm concentrating. If I allow my awareness my ball of light to move away. I'm getting distracted I use my willpower and I bring my awareness back and I hold it on her Being able to do that allows me to concentrate. Most people can't concentrate for two reasons, right? One is they've never been taught how to concentrate. Second is they never practice concentration. How many of you growing up here in school had classes on concentration every single day that you the same way you had classes on geography on math and science? Anybody? I travel all around the world and I ask this question and nobody puts their hand up How many of you when you were growing up in school were told to concentrate? Isn't that amazing you get told to concentrate but you never get taught how to do it, right? When I was growing up I got told to concentrate all the time. Dandapani, concentrate on doing your homework. Dandapani concentrate on eating your food Anybody wants to show me how to do it? No. How many of you have kids? How many of you tell your kids to concentrate? Have you ever showed them how to? No, right? And then if you don't show them how to concentrate how would they know how to do it? And then if you want to be good at something you have to practice it If you want to be really good at concentration, you need to practice it all day People are good at distraction because that's what they practice all day long. It's not that they don't have the ability to concentrate They've just practiced distraction and become really really good at it. So how do we concentrate. We concentrate by practicing doing one thing at a time and integrating this practice into our everyday life. So for me, I look at my average today and I ask myself. What's a reoccurring event in my life? Every day I speak with my spouse. Every time I speak with my spouse I give her my undivided attention I keep my awareness on her. It drifts away, I bring it back. It drifts away, I bring it back I keep my awareness on her I give her my undivided attention. Now every day I also speak to my clients. I speak with my clients. I speak with my friends family Every time I speak with somebody I give them my undivided attention If I'm on the phone I give the person on the phone my undivided attention I practice doing one thing at a time by the end of the day I've clocked about maybe six to eight hours of practicing concentration Six months later I'd become really good at concentration. Twelve months later I'd become really good at concentration. The best way to become good at something is to take a tool And insert it into a reoccurring event in your life And this is the best way to become good at something rather than to create another practice in your life Just take a tool and insert it into the practice into a reoccurring event in your life So your homework is to give someone or whatever you're doing your undivided attention pick one person in your life For the next one month that you will give your undivided attention to every time you speak with that person Stay completely focused on them. Keep your awareness on them the rest of the day You can go ahead and be a screw-up But just whenever you're speaking with that face and give that person your undivided attention and you need to practice and biuld in Incremental steps. The other thing we need to learn to develop is our willpower, right? Everybody is born with various levels of willpower But one thing we never get taught to do is to actually develop willpower and willpower is like a muscle I call it a mental bicep So if I could draw biceps around my mind, that would be my willpower. There are three ways to develop willpower: One, finish what you begin. Two, finish well beyond your expectations Three, do a little bit more than you think you're able to do. All of these three ways require effort and that effort is willpower, right? So, how do I develop willpower? I take these three methods and I apply it to things that reoccur in my life What's something that reoccurs in my life every day? Every day I sleep what a great opportunity to about willpower before I go to sleep. I floss I brush my teeth put on my pajamas I go to sleep when I wake up in the morning. I finish the process of sleep How do I finish the process of sleep I make the bed every day So every day I wake up in the morning I make the bed What's something else I do every day every day? I have breakfast if have time to make breakfast I have time to eat breakfast then I have time to do the breakfast dish and put it away, right? So I finished the process that I began and I bring this into everything that I do then throughout the day I develop willpower the more I practice this the better I get. Now I have tremendous amount of willpower after six months I've developed a lot of willpower. Every time my awareness drifts away I use that mental muscle that willpower to bring my awareness back Then I use the powers of concentration that I've developed to hold my awareness on what I'm focused on. And because I'm focusing on that Where my awareness goes energy flows in my now, my energy is flowing towards what I want that starts to manifest in my life that's why it's so important firstly to understand there's a separation between awareness and the mind two completely different things. If you control where your awareness goes you control where your energy is flowing and you control what's manifesting in your life And you use your powers of concentration your willpower to hold your awareness on the priorities in your life The next thing we want to do is to learn to manage energy in our life, right? This is based on the premise that we only have so much energy each day We have a finite amount of energy each day. Each day we have this much energy We take our energy and we invest it into people and things around us We keep investing investing investing until we have no more energy left. We get exhausted. That's usually around 11:00 or 11:30 or midnight We go to sleep our energy builds up again We go out the next day and we invest our energy into people and things so we have no more energy But the one thing most people don't do Is we never evaluate who and what we're investing our energy into. So I always tell people to treat energy the same way you treat money It's a finite resource that needs to be wisely managed wisely reallocated and wisely invested No matter how rich you are. You only have so much money, right? And before you spend money most of us think and evaluate what we're investing our money in. If somebody asks us for five thousand dollars or thirty thousand dollars invest into a start-up or a company, we would ask questions. We just wouldn't hand them 30 thousand dollars. We would ask what's your plan with it? What are you going to do with this money? What's my return on my investment? Because it's a finite resource So why don't we do the same thing with energy before we invest energy into someone or something? Why don't we evaluate if that person or that thing is deserving our energy? Because if you only have this much energy. And if I took 10% of my energy and I gave it to John that's ten percent I could have given to my spouse my business the things and people that I love Remember the law of thermodynamics energy cannot be created or destroyed but it can be transferred or transformed from one thing to another, right? So I can't create energy if I give 10% to John? I want to know he's gonna do something good with it. Because if he's just gonna squander it I'd rather take it and give it to the people and things that I love. So why is it important to manage energy? For me the greatest impetus for managing energy is death. That is the greatest impetus for me to manage energy I realized that life is finite that I only have one life as me and regardless of my beliefs. I know I have one existence as Dandapani and what happens after death I'm not quite sure. We all have different upbringing different religious beliefs Some people say when you die you go to heaven or hell. Some people say when you die, it's game over. That's it nothing happens afterwards Some people say when you die, you get reincarnated as a man or woman another say you get reincarnated as a man woman maybe an insect of an animal But no one really knows. We have our beliefs and we hold strongly to them But no one's ever died Gone to have and taking the selfie comeback posted it on Instagram and say look at me here in heaven. Hashtag pearly gates, right? so we don't quite know but the one definitive thing is that we know we're gonna die and I know I have a finite amount of life I don't believe life is short, but I do believe it's finite and because my life is finite I want to be extremely clear where to focus my energy There's no point learning to concentrate if you don't know what to concentrate on. So along with learning concentration it's really important to also learn what to focus on So what I would recommend as a homework is to be clear what your purpose in life is. One way to do this is to spend five minutes each morning reflecting on what your purpose of life is. Get to know yourself most people are happy to spend time with other people and things but very few people actually make time to spend time with themselves So when you wake up in the morning take a shower go to a quiet place in your house sit down and ask yourself Questions about you. What do you want in life? What's my purpose in life? Why am I here? What do I love? What am I passionate about how many people can genuinely answer? ... say this is my purpose in life. Very very few people Once you're clear with your purpose, you know what to concentrate on and you know what to direct your finite amount of energy to it Right. So the next thing we want to look at is energy consumers right. People and things are two of the biggest consumers of energy and people and things also give you a lot of energy since the subject is vast and time is short Let's focus on the people that consume energy and how we can deal with them. I call these people energy vampires. All right. That's what a vampire that's right bites you in the neck and sucks the life out of you. And some people consume tremendous amount of energy Essentially speaking, there are three types of people and let's keep this simple monk simple There are uplifting people there are neutral people and there are not uplifting people Okay, let's define what this is. Okay. What, they are. An uplifting person.. I spend five minutes with an uplifting person I walk away I feel great and go like wow, that was an amazing conversation a neutral person. I spend five minutes with them I walk away I'm still the same a non uplifting person. I spent five minutes with them I walk away and I go like oh my god, that was exhausting. All right, and you've probably experienced that in your life So then the next question is to ask is are they an energy vampire? There are two ways to figure this out one is I can judge or I can evaluate right? What's judging and evaluating judging is this I'm at a party in New York City in a penthouse There are 200 people in the room the door opens this guy walks and he's got white shoes a purple suit He's got a cane and the top hat. He's wearing a chain with a big clock hanging off his chest I look across the room and I go he must be a pimp or drug dealer. That's judging, right? I didn't get to know him. I just judged he was a pimp a drug dealer Evaluation is this I spent 50 occasions with John over a period of two years 49 of those I walk away from and I go like oh my god, that was exhausting It's safe for me to evaluate that John is an energy vampire. Okay, then there are two types of energy vampire The next question is are they a transient energy vampire inherently an energy vampire? Right. What's a transient energy vampire? Lets just say John is going through a hard time in life because his dad is dying of cancer for example. And for 3 years he consumes a lot of energy, you know, he's always down you need to uplift him he's feeling very sad It's ok. You give him that energy because he's your friend and that's what we do We express compassion empathy and love and we support our friends during difficult times Whats someone who's inherently an energy vampire? Someone who's inherently an energy vampires has always been this way, For decades this haven't changed. They're just not an uplifting human being at all. So how do we deal with someone who's inherently an energy vampire? So before I go there quick question for all of you How many of you in this room feel like you have someone who's inherently an energy vampire in your life? That's a lot of people in this room. Right. So how do we deal with someone who's inherently in an energy vampire, right? My guru taught me the best way to do this is to practice the art of being affectionately detached But always kind gentle sincere and loving towards them. What does this mean? So lets just say John is inherently an energy vampire I live in New York City. I'm walking down Fifth Avenue. I see John walking towards me What do I do do I cross the street? That's not very nice. I meet John John meets me What do you say when two people meet each other? I know what you guys say in Australia g'day, how's it going mate? Right? Do I say that? No, do you know why I don't ask "how are you?" Because I don't want to know It's true You have to understand. I'm in the Munk business when I ask somebody. How are you? They tell me the entire life story? It's the confession time so I don't even ask. How are you John asked me. How are you? I say I'm doing very well Thank you very much. And then I reply what a beautiful day in Sydney, right? It's true. I'm being sincere I'm being kind. And then I say to him, please, excuse me I have something really important to do. It's true My life is finite and I'm very clear what my purpose is Right. I'm not I'm not lying. And then what do people say at the end of a conversation? It was a pleasure meeting you. Actually it wasn't. Let's do lunch. Why? See you later. Not really. Don't want to Why do we say the things we don't mean and ask the questions we don't want answers to So at the end of a conversation I say have a wonderful day, which is true. I know he's inherently an energy vampire, but I do wish ya it's a wonderful day So the concept of being affectionately detached is to not engage with someone Right is to be kind to be gentle to be sincere and loving towards them but not engaging with them What's another way to protect yourself from an energy vampire? Is to place the burden of responsibility on them? What does that mean? I'll give you an example. I have a client of mine who's an expert in social media. (Right?) So a lot of people want to get together with him have a cup of coffee a glass of wine Let's catch up for lunch. Let's do dinner Why? Because they want to pick his brain. (right) And get information from him. And he can't sustained this because everybody wants a little bit of his time. And he just can't live this way. So I told him this is what you need to do. You need to tell this person who wants to meet with you to read your favorite marketing book Read your favorite marketing book write down seven key points and email it to you Once you receive the seven key points from the book tell them that, you know, you want to see what stands out to them in the book? Once you receive these seven key points you email them and say let's meet up on this day For a couple hours and we can discuss A marketing strategy for you. You know how many people actually read the book and email him the seven key points? Nobody. As soon as you place the burden or responsibility on someone they don't do it I travel all around the world. I speak people come up to me and want to ask questions I always give them my personal email address. I tell them please don't share it with anybody can you put your question down on this email and send it to me. (one) It will give me time to reflect on it and I can give you a proper response And they always say for sure. I'll put it all down an email I'll send it to you. You know many people email me. Nobody emails me Simple little tasks right? I'm not asking them to do yoga to meditate to breathe out of one nostril You just send me an email with your problems and they don't do it So place the burden a responsibility on someone if you're somebody who's developed a particular skill You're an expert in a particular niche in a particular area. And you find that people want your time They want your energy the one simple way to protect yourself is to place a bit and responsibility on them give them a simple task to do and See if they do it and if they fulfilled that task and come back to you then go out of your way to help them Okay Another thing I want to talk about so your spiritual practice is to every year evaluate the people in your life So go through a process evaluation and reallocate your energy between people who uplift you and people that don't uplift you And this is something that I do all the time. (right) Another thing I want to talk about and wrap up with is mental energy vampires. What's a mental energy vampire? Mental energy vampire is an unresolved emotional experience that is sitting in our subconscious. (right) Most people's subconscious mind looks like this Indian flower market. Its just packed with stuff Because people don't resolve stuff as they go through life (right) Everything that has once passed through your conscious mind in the form of experience is resident in your subconscious mind. And all these experiences have emotion attached to them (All right) One simple way to deal with unresolved emotional experiences is to do this exercise called abatana dahad tantra That's the Sanskrit name for it. And what it really is is to take a piece of paper and write down the problem on it Every experience has emotion attached to it. And I want to share with you a quote from Tesla, which I think really encapsulates the philosophy that I believe in or that I was trained in the monastery Tesla says: "If you want to find the secrets of universe think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration" Everything is made up of energy and it's vibrating at a certain frequency So if I have an experience, it has emotion attached to it, it's vibrating in my subconscious mind My goal is, I can't do anything about the experience because it's already happened. But what I can do to help myself is to remove the emotion that's attached to experience. So I take a piece of paper and I write down the problem. As I write down the problem something really interesting happens: that experience moves from my subconscious mind to my conscious mind because I'm reliving it The interesting thing that happens is the energy and the emotion actually comes out of the experience flows through my hands into the piece of paper Now I crumbled a piece of paper and I burn it in a fire It could be a garbage can a fireplace it doesn't really matter. Does the fire destroyed the emotion? No, because you can't destroy energy. But what it actually does is transform the emotion in the paper into heat flame ash smoke and a whole bunch of different things I remember the first time I ever shared this exercise was with a group of entrepreneurs in Perth actually about five years ago. And one of them said to me: "Look Dandapani, I realize that experiences have emotion attached to them. And I realize as well when you relive it or you're writing about it. It goes from your subconscious mind to your conscious mind But this whole concept that emotion comes out of the experience flows through your hands into the piece of paper I find it really hard to believe. I find that it's a little bit too spiritual. I said: "Fair enough" So I asked him: "Do you have kids?" He says: "Yeah, I have a couple of kids, a four-year-old and a six-year-old" and I said: "On Father's Day or on your birthday did they ever make you cards?" They said: "They do that all time" Can you describe the card? Well, they say usually they go to the back of the house They find an old piece of cardboard they draw on it They stick a bunch of things on it stars and and a bunch of ribbons and then on last day on my birthday they hand me the card. And I said: "How does it look?" They go: "Oh well doesn't look that great, it's made by a four-year-old" But I said: "Let me ask you this way if you saw it in the store, would you pay money for it?" And they go like: "No! No way" "But do you keep it?" He says: "Yeah, I keep every single one." And asked him: "Why?" He said: "Well, it's so full of love". So wait a minute. You're telling me your kids know monk magic Because two minutes ago I told you about putting emotion on a piece of paper And you looked at me like I was a crazy person and now your four-year-old son knows how to do this (right) Because he's taking a piece of paper and puts his emotion in it. A piece of paper that you don't want a card board you didn't want. Puts his emotion in it and now he's giving it to you and you hold it So you can actually transfer emotion from inside of you into another matter How many of you have kids and have one of those not so attractive drawings at home? Do you keep them? Why? You'd never be able to sell it to anybody. Nobody would want to buy it, right? You keep it because they're so full of love. It's full of emotion, right so you can move emotion out of you So the exercise here is really if you ever find that you have unresolved emotional experiences sitting in your subconscious. Consuming tremendous amount of energy. Take a piece of paper write it down and then burn it in an ordinary fire How many times should you write? Well, depending on the emotion. If it's an intense experience you might have to write about it three or four times if it's not so intense, maybe once or twice So just to wrap up over here To know yourself is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself it truly is. (right) Most people don't really understand themselves they don't understand what they want in life and therefore find it extremely difficult what to focus their finite amount of energy on. I want to leave you with two quotes one from my guru The first one is proceed with confidence (right) Proceed with confidence Believe in your ability to manifest something in your life. Because you can. How do you manifest something in your life? You take your awareness you focus it on that thing You know how to develop concentration now you keep your awareness on it when your awareness is on it That's where your energy is flowing when your energy flows there It starts to manifest in your life. And believe in your ability to do that and proceed with confidence. The next thing is: Life is meant to be lived joyously. It truly is. And if you're not happy with life then something needs to be changed. If you ask most people what do they want in life? They'll always say most people often answer "I want to be happy." Happiness should never be pursued. Don't pursue happiness. Pursue a lifestyle that results in happiness. And that's for me what I do. I never chase happiness I pursue a lifestyle where the byproduct of the lifestyle is happiness. In order to find out what that lifestyle is I need to know what my purpose in life is. In order to do that I need to spend time with myself each day to find out who and what is important in my life Take that finite amount of energy that I have each day Focus it into those things. That starts to manifest in my life. The byproduct of that is happiness All right, so I want to say thank you and I want to leave you with a small gift If you go to this website address You'll find a five-week online course on understanding the mind and also on how to develop concentration and willpower You're welcome to sign up for it. You just need your name and email address and you'll receive that every Week on email. Thank you very much everyone. I hope you enjoyed it
Listened to the whole talk, not something I do often with 1/2 hour videos. Thought it was a bit basic. Would have liked to hear more about manifestation. Also, did not know there was a monastery in Hawaii? Will have to look that one up
Thank you for posting this, I was really struggling with how far away my goal is. It's just a huge goal.