Colin Quinn - Golden Globes Opening Monologue - Jim Norton & Sam Roberts

oh my God look who's outside yet I get in it Colin Quinn is wandering around outside like he's like a homeless person yeah I'd like to get his take on all this good morning all right show businesses Colin Quinn is here show biz show businesses Colin Quinn sit down you just woke up hey you just woke up Jesus it's not that nice no sorry no so you look like you should challenge the day and defeated welcome Colin cool just talking about the Golden Globes we were in the afterglow of the Golden Globes we loved awards season here on the show it's very inclusive this year Oh God you loved that Jim what what about what a crushing bore it is yeah it really is I mean that monologue I loved I loved hearing that monologue because I was that good that's what you want is that what you wanted to show business good that's humour now just all the finding to make fun of not you know but saying hey we're gonna be edgy well we're not really of course you're not right we're making fun of the idea of being edgy yes right act like because that's what we should be doing can you imagine if we insulted you guys let's make fun of that all gone so indicative of what's going on yeah really it's never gonna change them comedy everyone has been saying it's gonna swing back and we've been talking about if it's not yeah never gonna swing back not in our lifetime but uh maybe like if there was a real what we need you know is that natural disaster would really bring back things that I let him brought it back for a little while but then all of a sudden that then it went back again well no but I mean much bigger than that I mean like a natural like a you know like a tsunami level thing where suddenly everyone is like oh you know I have to eat I have to you know survive and then yeah the humor comes back from that from the primal sources no maybe that's because what is it because people don't let's hope people don't worry so much about Rob's got to get by you to adjust the cameras just to make sure that your frames properly come [Laughter] yeah so you think that if there's a natural disaster what people's sensitivities kind of relax a little bit we realize that maybe all this all this other stuff isn't quite as important as we make it out I don't know what else that's just a shot in the dark for what could happen at like Jim said it certainly doesn't seem like he's going back I used to sell everybody's going back I had that conversation with every comedian to look you know it's gonna go I think no it's not probably that it's unfortunate yeah I'm not swinging back I mean it hasn't you would think it would have swung back already because we thought we'd gone as far as we were gonna go the comedians are getting involved with it now the comedians are getting outraged 12:00 - yeah yeah good yeah yeah well you would think you would think like we were talking about when you've got you are we already had it like we had Ricky Gervais by hosting the same award show right where he was making fun of the celebrities wasn't even wasn't brutal he was just he was just doing this funny he was funny but that was looked at like that's what was being made fun of last thing full disclosure Ricky Gervais says folks has also been a serious employee trouble when people start to notice rightfully nothing of interest that right Roland it reminds me of uh Orson Welles in the Citizen Kane he's pulling the strings he's the puppet master years one day that that snow globe will just fall finally you'll realize it wasn't worth it Roland it wasn't worth it but that's what was being made fun of the idea that can you get the idea of mockery right somebody would go on can you believe that somebody would make fun of Mel Gibson to his face all of the audacity of it all yeah did you want we were just playing the clip of Sandra Oh's serious moment after they had had all right and somebody it was so over the top that even in the audience somebody didn't realize that she was trying to have a moment and laughed at her open I know I was impressed by the acting part the same thing I said oh she's being ironic right he can't he can't switch in the middle of some medicine just wait a segment is oh yeah I should have hosted yeah that was that was the opening for never mind yeah what for Anthony to do guys no that's why gestured to him but it wasn't he was always there well that's Tecna and same we're in on the joke I didn't get it it was a radio thing the audience doesn't know the radio thing no but I didn't get it cuz I know I seat you man all right right Jim's like no but it's the wrong seat well no you just didn't get it is I come on we're both right yeah you're right you're right of course oh yeah what about uh meanwhile not to take thee now the what used to be called the gay angle but I'd like to say I am a little angry the Stars no one didn't mean no I didn't see you sorry sir I saw what I did see I heard had a lovely score actually did and I have to say mr. Jim is a little biased he is a little monsters there now that should innominate first of all dice was fine it was it was like oh my god it was a baby was good but then I wasn't doing dirty limericks though so all of a sudden people go like I can't believe he can speak like a human exactly the standards may have been a little over dice man right and then and then but it was cool it was right one movies I'm watching it and I'm uh I was like I don't want to see this movies to law I hate it I hate of the original stars of bones both of them was that Kris Kristofferson and that's it was boring and then Barbara's rising this was good this is better great yell did I heard good things that's it did you watch the Queen movie that one the Bohemian I was in first 15 minutes and it was like he's they put a love story the whole thing first of all together directed as I go serial child molester directed by Brian saying I was like that the same Brian singer by the way I don't know if you stayed up for the whole thing last night no mention of Brian singer in the acceptance oh of course no no no no he wasn't on stage no mention of like it was thanks to Freddie Mercury thanks to the wonderful producers thanks to the two stars of the 30 fainted director no-one's ever not thanked the director now there's no way they're gonna thank him after they should have had like just a footage of like what's-his-name with with with Burt Reynolds in Boogie Nights when he's behind the saloon Jack just so innocent the size small Jack I never touched them I never touched me just look at them they're so small we're friends right yeah there it is I'm here bats do you guess but yeah so you are selling the 15 minutes what's 50 minutes per day I already said it's like this weird movie is not good right honest horrible even when they opened just to have a great song like all up front like bad like whatever I figured but I was loose it was the one of the best songs of Queen right up front during their approved no reason I was like this movie's gonna stink right they spent and that's the thing like they trick people you see movies do this sometimes they trick people into thinking it's a good movie because the music is so good so they're playing these Queen songs and all these people are going oh [ __ ] I haven't heard that song in forever yeah this song is brilliant so this movie I guess is brilliant you go no no no no no yes you're just enjoying the song they destroyed Freddie Mercury's legacy in the movie I think we can safely say that we can first of all yeah did you know he's gay I didn't know that no I when I was going up we never you know we people say Queen the gate will I go shut up nobody knows England what are you talking about yeah that's a that's so weird to me that you would watch that in there was a generation that was with Queen that was sitting there going like there's no this is manly a man as can be we didn't know Rob Halford was gay like right you look back at all the old but Judas Priest videos where he's like wearing leather and it's you know hell-bent for leather and all this like you know it's it's like you had a little gay leather hats and like how did everybody not know we had no idea was gay we just thought what a badass leather man right no that's probably the steel dragon scene was based on right right right when he goes oh yes that's right oh right yes yo it's the greatest when he when he goes like he goes like well you know Elvis used to do this and then one of the band mates goes yeah but he was the King and then he goes and what does that make me the Queen yeah very funny and he leaves the band that's the that's rock star well Mark Wahlberg has to replace him one the most underrated great movies of all - dude it's my favorite movie of all and honestly it's better than Bohemian Rhapsody yeah no it's a good I watched it ironically that sounds like a you know you don't admit to people you like it but I've actually liked it underneath rock star rock star my wife I want something more than twice without kind of liking it right my wife is disgusted by mix I'll put it on I'll start doing the lines as they're doing it like I know the entire movie front to back she's gonna poison you exactly say you think you see you know whatever you being it's not cute now they hate him stinks but it was hot yeah she was whoo and so was the other one Jennifer Aniston yeah right who ends up being low with somebody of Jim's taste who does there's this the the you talking about the assistant right the assistant in the movie that's like flirting with her eyes and has an orgy with with Mark Wahlberg and Jennifer Aniston but then after all the sex has happened Mark Wahlberg realizes that in rock and roll not everything is as it appears to be because she's pissing standing up in the morning oh and you go oh man get that whole course she's pissing standing up I gotta watch it again you got to there's a lot of little details you got about a good girl and you know was in it what's his face you know from the affair he's in everything oh yeah yeah yeah what's a Dominic West yeah from the wire yeah yeah he's Kirk Cuddy yeah you say he's one of the leads you know like this movie I'll watch it it's great it's a new right yes in 1999 there's so much about it like I think yeah 1999 2000 first close one 2001 it was the peak time that nobody cared about hair metal anymore no that's right so why it would take place then who knows the cast is phenomenal like it's a whole bunch of a listers and this movie that you're like what the how the hell did this even get made yeah everything about it is amazing that's right right exactly how exact wilder than that alright I know that yeah he's just for him he's in the band I've got like two lines he's got the shotgun out the window that he's like you know he's shooting road signs with it is the tour bus is going through because Timothy roll is wild yeah let me just say let me go back for one second the Golden Globes do you think there's anybody who's not like severely mentally damaged who watch that last night instead of laughing and going this was entertainment and this was a good time people who blog about stuff like that who with it where they hear the word inclusion they're happy like people who think like that enjoyed it there are cues right could you enjoy it or they were just enjoying the idea of it probably sound could you enjoy the actual experience of such a boring I think it's free idea I think there are little cues like there are cue words that when they're said or when a famous person laughs or whatever you go that's funny that's good because Andy Samberg is making the audience laugh do we have any of it the opening monologue inclusion I'm sure it's out there I don't have anything on my board or a lot well it's a long story we'd have to yeah we'd have to you have to del Del T there we go we don't get the opening monologue from other I'll bet we have it check the email that was sent oh yes what maybe yeah there was a perfect yes my man Troy was about to find a control no yahuwah's what is it tough Colin was it are you starting to see the underbelly of this system it's the same thing that happens when you do Stern right me underbelly Stern just kind of stammers around until somebody comes in and find something on YouTube go ahead Troy [Applause] - already bombing they dress that one so we're there were a couple of great that's they addressing queue they don't have a host yet right right but that funny stuff do they're gonna bring up the homophobia or the you know yeah it's edgy you know happy I am a Kevin Hart said not a toy I walked waving it you there are a couple moments in this thing though where even in that room the jokes died like there were a couple of jokes that just got go ahead what's his name Borat Winnie's be himself yeah I thought you're gonna do something outrageous would show you sitting there happy yeah yeah I'm a regular guy shut up character show up in like garter belts or size like that do something crazy Hollywood half marathon because it messes up all the traffic you know oh yeah I hate that race of people it's the worst race of people now we know you guys are stand-up comedians right you touch I'm enjoying I'm enjoying like that yes what do you do good stuff what do you what do you do as a comic performer when there's a joke like that written for you on a teleprompter right and there you have to repeat the punchline several times but the first time it died like gay people were like oh it's stupid and then you realize race of people you're gonna have to repeat even though nobody thought it was funny the first time we don't have to worry about that mm-hmm because we are never going to be in this situation with this teleprompters I disagree I still hold out hope you mean like a televised thing exactly I worry about chicken wings and it's a roasted yeah is the waitress gonna spill something on someone Samberg and Sandra oh the two nicest people in showbiz this thing's gonna be a snooze but not so fast because you fools are all about to get roasted your bass style it's already they mentioned your babies in a way rap jokes over yeah you know they're gonna do well you're getting a rose if the first joke aside all right wrap it gervase style yeah well I'll tell you does the right thing you as a director lifetime fan can't wait to see what you do next BAM face house I can't watch any more why is funny it's good stuff it is fun huh see I'm so glad good it's terrible Jim is walking in cold it's hot even see this is good so with that I was first of all I've been feeling well so I went to bed probably nine o'clock less Philly no I haven't been feeling well oh I was sad you sure took the day off didn't called me hey you want a substitute host I've sat in a couple of times been the second Mike this is really good yeah this is good because Jim okay we're watching it again yeah we're gonna get your fresh take on us you don't want any of this no god it's okay good because he thought you might otherwise she's gonna come from his stomach you think you're sick before you came in here with us you thought they were gonna really yeah and Spike Lee this is nice and they went the other direction after the race through misdirection yeah you like that my divorce they've had them drop it they even had him dress up in a foolish purple suit with a purple parade to set him up yeah you think you looked a little silly [Laughter] [Music] Bradley Cooper that's cute you like that I do it's like he's being roasted because he's hot it's like it's watching really the end of comedy this is that's cute this is what they want I'm glad this is what the good are you thinking about maybe shaping your act a little bit like right this is funny yeah that's weird Gina Rodriguez is here yeah why is that weird Sandra last time I checked she resided in heaven I love that that's cute so what they've earned what they deserve yeah this is earned this this is they go back in here to slam each other I like that you like that I do just it is more there's more commentary why don't I go back in here slap each other you're worried more than I know that's funny it's an eight-minute mile but I was shocked at a standing but the hard monologue is that you're worried this is gonna last forever Colin yes it's already - you're in purgatory don't worry oh okay Oh Sandra oh snap Andy Samberg more like any slams nerds ooh I love that what else who else oh I got one Michael B Jordan yeah Oh more like Michael be buff AF you a snack Michael your character's name and Creed is Adonis and it is AB oh oh yes get up go to him crying off that I want to get the meme no you don't like that one is Russian I didn't I Unite's it's it's the idea of slamming like look will be ironic and slam mean comedy like look at weekend like we're making the act like they're making fun of being mean yeah I guess that's right yeah but they're not no they're just being nice because it's it's cute that's it yeah because they can't be funny the other way and that's you're right it almost starts us like we're gonna we're gonna defend against it nobody wants to see that mean comedy anymore right we're here's what we've got then you go this isn't what I mean but they had what I'm saying is there's no other option they had right that's why our culture is there's no option that was a fun joke Dodie just about that Michael Jordan BJ did you hear him calmest you say you a snack yeah yeah I didn't like that no buffet yeah that one that stands for as [ __ ] I know oh you do okay it's me they understand the Internet exactly they're talking to the Instagram crowd I want to see Amy Adams get burned you like because yeah one of my favorite I want to see you get burned quite literally do you mean the roast fashion no do you mean trapped by a seatbelt of an overturned car oh no the door won't open and the hoods on fire I want to see your eggs get burned this morning and have you [ __ ] throw a hissy fit very hungry go for it try wait who's going to get [ __ ] babies next [ __ ] atm I wanted I'm talking about hammy hands now you got me thinking about food you want to get some food cause I got it brings it up because and see you now you got me thinking about Colin I got some bad news what the [ __ ] loaf already left to get the food what without even is [ __ ] without insulting his phone number do you want it I'm even worried sometimes about just the way Jim acts about his goddamn eggs these guys probably spits it on food oh now here he comes up the hall right now he's literate he's already gotten the food Colin we can just go back for you he's coming in if I was 25 I swear to god I'd pick him up and dump him right now he's not asking you didn't even consult where's your breakfast to bodyslam him I'm sick of bringing my own TV the occasion out of this kids a wrestle from Nutley he does have an Utley wrestling oh thank you he's a [ __ ] wrestle back in the day you know [ __ ] love and he's still in good shape there are some of the guests that may be a little hungry and weren't ass I was gonna say I was gonna say now don't bother then I realized he [ __ ] brought me in before he left and he didn't ask you can't you knew Colin was here first thing he brought me down here what's that but I didn't know you owe anything that's a very general question I need plenty yeah I mean is it he says he puts the headphones on but he still stays 30 feet away from the microphone but yeah I guarantee he looks just like the kind of kid he probably spit in your eggs cuz your shitty attitude I don't want it to happen me so I'm gonna put on the Charmin this is like the gold colin is like the golden globes of breakfast manners yeah but I can't result I'd like to get first of all I don't want the show to pay you know I good what is it egg whites it tastes like the thing they grill it on where'd you go sounds good to me that you getting another place downstairs in the courtyard the expensive place what's up with that you all right Metro yeah yes here's a cutting corners oh that's the expensive place that's the place where they yeah I'm paying for my whoa breakfast for the crew on Colin Quinn crew yeah all right give him a credit card haven't ordered all around all right yeah take orders around Troy whatever you want it whatever anybody wants yeah you going to the metro these are these taste like the thing they were cooked on Oh Jim a little why don't we do the Metro anymore yeah likes your scratch Jim is our little extra scratch couple extra bucks Jimmy couple extra bucks is that we don't go there yeah I don't know what you got in your contract but it's a couple of extra I'm paying for it well I pay phone well then you're giving what you pay for because it's a couple extra bucks to go down yeah go down to cafe Metro or whatever the place is called okay these are not good okay so what I'm buying what do you what do you want somebody eating them what do you want Jim stop eating don't engine Collins gonna get you some better food spit that out uncle Collins gonna get you better food he's got cheese something it out I'm buying dinner he's buying dinner for every day after all I'm getting some others do I get to promote my new show when I'm here hey that's true stop eating it's gross even I'm disgusted by his eggs now that I think about the grill Jim do you want different eggs I just save the most it might need it okay hopefully Metro doesn't serve most of it in the 70s I love mustard um I don't think about mustard I think about Jim loves it in every meal how annoying that is to me you don't like mustard I don't like most and I hate that you like mustard hey you both I've always hated mustard but now every time think of must I think it Jim shoveling mustard understand I love mustard you hate mustard you hate Jim Norton so when those things are gonna come on you know when I came in to the cellar and you tried to spoil my pretzel treat oh yeah what did you do Colin I salt it up as mustard and improved the mustard yeah they put lime stuff in a this is delicious reminded know I was great meanwhile he spit in my goddamn team once and I drank his I got my spit no I had a piece of um spearmint gum oh you put your chewed up gum and many many years ago gum and I drink my tea I like mint tea what day were you laughing up gum Jim were you laughing when he said I don't like mint tea I was I've never been happier it's a moment that's right Pete that's my 15 years ago yeah and you look in the company just try and shoot up come and I bottom I peaked about a week later on tough crackers tough grouse on 11th Avenue so you couldn't get up there and Jimmy had his kappa cheese stall box under stage there was no stores within three blocks mornings dogs hadn't even drank it yet he said something snotty and I put my breakfast treat into him this company knew there was no way around it this is like standing there suffering it's great they've been amazing that those little things those are the memories that last forever it's like 15 years later you click remember that time I put a coin I can't believe is that many years ago yeah 15 years yeah [ __ ] how old were you 15 years ago Connor what do you want [ __ ] love to pick you up um whatever you want it's on you I want what are you getting at the same thing I'll get the eggs with yeah we're kind of exited yet hey actually being a regular scrambled eggs yeah buddy it's a Monday party day I haven't eaten much this weekend so I wasn't feeling well no I want egg whites because I might had a heart attack I'm supposed to eat egg whites all right now is that bad for your heart to have regular like sometimes no once in a while it's fine you know what I've found moderation cats like really eight is the key you know you guys are so wise I want a a tee a plane let me write it down I'm smart yeah this is not good radio what's giving our breakfast orders well that's okay no we can't be having to the last stopped you before oh yeah we can be having some laughs oh that's true that's true okay Colin you're gonna write down your order we'll get back to the monologue the comedy monologue from last night's Golden Globe Awards and we can't forget Amy Adams fill your shoes tonight hey Amy save some for the rest of us you make a talented piece of dog crap take your lives and then of course there's Jeff Bridges right mister I did get the feeling that Jeff Bridges might have been on under the influence of something like I hate the faces all the actors are make you and they go to it like me right bridges that no he'd be too with his dumb monologue why I didn't mind Jeff Bridges he just kind of rambling about writing the [ __ ] that's but that's what I'm saying it's this idea that these people are like you especially you know important I'd love to hear his take like we can do it like we can all we can change things if we want to but like they're these unique like special people oh my god right so psychotic in our system it's true we'll go back to it [Laughter] [Applause] Lorne Michaels can't really think that this is funny he's probably doing it probably proud of Andy Samberg he's one of his guys but he can't really be sitting there going like oh yeah I got to do a bit like this on SNL maybe is maybe maybe at this point he is no no there's a lot more Black Panther is nominated tonight for Best Picture Drama it is the third highest-grossing movie of all time in the u.s. movies the characters ride around and rhinoceroses like our horses I have been saying that for years Hollywood she really she slept over that one didn't you yep right in rhinoceros [ __ ] butcher that joke it's still funny to watch someone trip they ride in you ride on her right laughter you wouldn't right insider right now he certainly wouldn't now hey get out of me was Black Panther better than Bohemian Rhapsody I'm sure it was yes I didn't see it yes Black Panther was better I mean I Black Panther was good but it it was a superhero movie it was like a good superhero movie it wasn't it didn't I don't I don't think it did anything I've never seen a good superhero movie in all my life I haven't seen very light you know like Marvel movies I hate them I hate DC and Marvel I hate it all I don't love but what about the Batman on culture what about the Christian Bale Batman movies those are good I saw one of them was okay okay was it great all right you mean a bit of a curmudgeon yeah and was the was the Black Panther movie who were the villains in that just other people over there in the continent in Wakanda yeah know who the villains just absorb Black has two other villains I guess the villains came from outside of Wakanda but they did what they the villain is an african-american actor yes yes it was it was it was di knew where you were going yeah know that you thought the white man was being victimized right the hero of Wakanda wanted to share the wealth that Wakanda had with the world whereas the villain of Wakanda wanted to keep what was in Wakanda wakanda's right so but both both were both right by African American of legitimate arguments by the way it's actually great take you know keeping the wealth in the places you know to mean well you know they say not keeping the wealth in Africa's probably led to the destruction of the continent it's not Africa it's Wakanda what kind of what kind of forever not keeping me not keep them all then probably helped destroy the well they say that every great villain might has to believe that they are not a villain yeah you know you have to be able to go yeah I could see where they said why they still away if you've got to secretly go I kind of sided with the villain you know why are you saying that you don't think comedy is doing well when you watch this this really I'm so happy because this is where this is exactly what Hollywood is wanted this is what they deserve yeah humorless comedy when I was fake his stuff 1953 they did a jokes at war they said this great that they don't want to do away with comedy they could do away with humor yeah so they're fine doing humorless comedy right right right comedies good yeah the humor part we don't like what it's all led to is this monologue yeah yeah well let's have some oh I'm enjoying it great well know who's here rolling here comes rolling with a spot of tea knowledge win that's nice it's very nice it's nice I - honey you know me wrong I have a very good relationship in many ways do you take your tea bag out to text we have a few laughs no it's been in for a long time I can see just by looking thanks Roland why don't leave it in when you drink your tea I always get I always leave my tea bag in well you're used to like Roland walking in silently in giving the tea and then leaving he's the most hostile it would be worth it would be better if he came in cursed us all out and left oh yes it is it's a man that's I'm telling you he's a please pulling the puppet strings he's like goddamn Citizen Kane right like Foster Kane like I have no regard for whatever's going on in this room whether you're doing a show but I have no regard for I just dropped me off because I decided it's time right I'm big picture and I'm and he's also kind of digging that you guys let you know like this is how it's done which that I agree with you a spot readies literally never brought a beverage inferred and myself or Jim well because yeah I mean that's you guys have a long all much deeper relationship with Roland then all of a half and thank God man but I just feel like rug first of all no shows except for the only show is when Kelly Regis and Kelly were together then you go there they give you breakfast treats fun time no show I've ever been on in this big metropolitan city of New York ever has fun breakfast treats the morning shows it's really a business turn no they have nothing after they have catered food every catered breakfast there I'm having been Anson said the new thing I guess maybe but they didn't advocated breakfast didn't nothing that's just the legend they're just rumors they circulate the whole you know there's a bouncy castle back there behind those doors it's amazing breakfast for guests no at least now when I was there maybe certain guests ooh yeah a listers you're an a-lister to us Colin but that really says more about us than it does all right let's go back to this yeah I mean they're not done with the monologue yet this is great stand you like to joke I love him right good-natured right first of all one last thing yeah I don't like that Roland gives you me this much honey this is like one sliver of honey he's got a small little container that you would put a side of guacamole the honey and he looked he literally looked like a little baby bear it's less than a quarter is about an eighth full of honey it really does look like a little pause but dipped in there do you eat honey look who's been sleeping in my bed now I don't usually eat it but I appreciated the effort to gesture it's a natural sweetener Roland is one of the guys you just like because you know he's not he doesn't play games you know I mean he's you know he does like a lot of jobs around here that we don't know about rolling literally plays games yes he does no it does not do other jobs you don't know about he is a gossiping political monster yes Roland ahead bones of Roland's of [ __ ] public backstabbing him he does nothing but like South American like socialist like minor officials yeah just suddenly he's on top for a couple of years it doesn't last that long you just [ __ ] take some old now because nobody realized that he allowed the coup to happen right which would put him in a position right yeah Pinochet says they killed a lot of bad people good people never got yeah yeah I guess a that you know what enough of this talk is too serious it's hilarious you gotta get back to the lab there's a comedy show we want to get and it's a comedy show for today's audience Colin we don't wanna live we're trying to get a younger demo exactly exactly let's hear some more Troy ok it was another huge year for director Ryan Coogler a fellow Bay Area native watch watch the look he gets watch the thousand-yard which you don't watch do you hear that audience that's like I don't know if we can laugh it yes I don't know like that that that line is there's a little chip yeah yeah not even the joke this setup was like oh I don't like where this is going yeah members of the actual Black Panther Party saying like an audition just kidding they were all framed and murdered for wanting justice inequality the world isn't always happen yeah his face his face is just looking at him like the [ __ ] do you know about the Black Panthers where are you going guys where you going the Sanford where are you going with this do not have a fake amused look on his face no so you know this [ __ ] that I've had to deal with in this industry to even get this movie made where you going with this Samberg where you going we didn't need the politically correct yeah exactly but go on but you you you really are in a mood over this college you didn't like Sam's little uh racism like sibs cold cries for justice in the middle of this crash a monologue know you don't want comment maybe you need to realize that you're able to trash this monologue from a place of white privilege that other people are not able to trash it from okay once you can get there I do not go for speak on this yeah time to listen you do not get to speak on this Colin what is that from it's just like I think it's your answer because the question is asinine oh I've heard that started on Instagram you know you put the clamp emojis okay make sense thank you yes you did answer me you didn't want to ask me but you did yes but that is you didn't deserve an answer I know I meant well now that I know now I don't know why you're right but even that is telling like it started the way teenage girls talk yes and now it's like appropriate for adults to like try to make a political point yeah you know well I mean that's you don't get to talk on this yeah speak on this but then I want to talk on this term that's how I speak I say just coming from his feelings right now doing my thing can we go back just a little bit cuz I want to hear Andy Samberg cuz as we're watching Ryan Coogler face you also have to hear like Andy samberg's like he's just cramming in like just an apology for the white race for everything that happened to the black dancers like you know the Black Panthers yeah did some good did some bad yeah yeah but Andy it's just like s Ryan Coogler it's just staring holes into him yeah these apologize yes chemistry is good though it's good well you always know before you go into a Golden Globes you always know you're in for a treat when they have an actress as the host instead of a comedian yeah you're like this is gonna be a memorable one this is gonna be a good one yeah I want her take when are they gonna stop having them I guess you have to read off cue cards but it just never works when they're going back in for um yeah no never worse because the chemistry is not real it never works no maybe they need more hours of rehearsal Jim ever think of that no no no I think that's what it is that's a great that's a great point there's the thing about chemistry it can be rehearsed yeah yeah just what just rehearse it yeah do you think he rushes through the good part of this I love it listen to him rush through cuz he's easy yes he's nervous about this one yeah he's tap dancing excuse the expression for this Thank You Colin you do not get to speak on tap dance Panther that starts off in Oakland this is not what I would have imagined Ryan were there like a bunch of old members of the actual Black Panther Party saying just kidding they were all framed and murdered for wanting justice and equality in the world isn't always has been a nightmare it just seems worse now because of our phones what else happened this year and then everybody's comfortable like did you hear people wouldn't laugh when he said the Black Panthers couldn't get an audition yeah and then people like whoa I don't know about all that the word black isn't it we don't know what to do and then when he says well the world's always been a nightmare bad we're bad we're bad oh all the Whitey's were just like we approve let's go sign off on this continue Bradley Cooper and Lady gaga [Applause] and their performances were incredible and he just proves and I'm just coming up with this now that there can be a hundred people in the room and 99 don't believe in you and you just need one to believe in you that's what he said to heart I figured that out stupid it was a meme lady Lady Gaga said it in all of her interviews in other news and Madonna called her out because what Madonna said that she copied that quote from her like she copied all her songs oh yeah I mean there's several layers deep Lady Gaga's sexy yeah I think so too actually yeah anyway by the way it has the HOS nice shoulders I don't like that dress [Laughter] it's just downstairs Wow has the host given up on the well these have but have the hosts of the Golden Globes given up on the premise of the fake roasting thing because now they're just complimenting without pretending to roast anymore oh I'll drink your tea instead of Roland's just to piss him off alright let's go for it I was just thinking you know totally off-the-cuff there could be a hundred people in the room and 99 don't believe in you and you just need one to believe in you and that quite frankly was Bradley Cooper so true so true yeah crazy meanwhile what's-her-face Lady Gaga is the only one I like is they interviewed before uh-huh and she goes they go you like the character in the movie character movies gets taken out of nowhere and just becomes a stalkers Bradley couple pushes as she's nothing and she goes no that was just the opposite she goes I was like everybody get out of my way she that's elbowing she made it in business like a little honesty was yeah yeah yeah [Applause] it is the first studio film with an Asian American lead since ghost in the shell in Aloha oh boy but he explained look explain those to Jim to this square I'm guessing those from movies relations wrong Colin those are movies that they whitewashed with dance called Johansson and Emma Stone is in the back and she goes I'm sorry she did Aloha right that was her lo hot and ghost in the shell' yeah Emma didn't do both of them didn't know but I mean she yelled I'm sorry from the back of the room right well it wasn't there I guess otherwise who would have expected one from hers yeah she was out with chip Collins eating his entire eggs in one pipe this monologue shippin cringe yeah do you think so uh-huh Wow right Jim crazy region chip has better jokes on his mouth let's go I don't know about that let's see I bet it's gonna have real tight I'll bet it's gonna end strong TV changes made over 200 million dollars at the box office said Asian moms everywhere she makes like a disapproving face because you know Asian parents are historically very hard to impress Tiger moms that's right but you know that's a joke for Sandra Oh to make not the rest of of course you know I think if it's if Sandra says it's okay to laugh we'll laugh but beyond that I don't I don't feel terribly comfortable I agree you know and also to generalize like that is not my cup of tea no me neither right I don't so this this joke rubbed me the wrong how's it going though you like that know what she did no pun intended rub me the wrong way okay Colin you're really stepping over the line with that one yeah jobs on the line Colin Quinn makes Asian masseuse joke whoa all right let's go back to it [Applause] hey she didn't seem so impressed so cheers to crazy adjacent you guys deserve a drink before we start getting sloppy Oh take care of my people so they don't get the Asian flush gasps all around a pepcid ac right there hey pause Jim you're loving this aren't you right the guy walks in with pepcid ac and it's written in big letters with a giant jar of pepcid ac and camera-friendly letters well guess what that when he can't blame their directors like what's his purpose IG make sure the perhaps it is big at the lab oh hey but it's not the most sophisticated scroll back just a little bit Cassandra Oh kind of explained by the way my favorite part you guys could even see that as the director Colin has I'm holding a cigarette here's to crazier changes you guys deserve a drink before we start getting sloppy I gotta take care of my people so they don't get the Asian flush now so around a pepcid ac right there wait a minute wait what's the Asian flush don't worry this job jokes not for you copy that but I will say if we've got a bunch of they're not even did you notice she tripped on it yep she's tripping on a lot of chunks isn't she poor Sandra I don't might even gonna say imagine doing it the other way I'm not even comment but by the way the table of Asia people they weren't laughing you know they weren't like ah finally somebody brought up the Asian flush they were like what is this yesterday see ya over there you know it's the greatest Alan Ark yeah it's just sitting there going this is not funny I don't even pretend to be a made a joke about the old is because they're old right the old guy Alan Arkin doesn't want any part of this shivay Schoen no I didn't stunk did Christian always a bad huh yeah Christian Bale was amazing did he win anything I know he won Best Actor okay in a comedy or musical or whatever they say how's that comedy or musical it's done in a comedic fashion okay it's not like a straight-up comedy but it's certainly you know I'm gonna say this Christian Bale I think he's great at a lot of his movies whoa hot thing do we have the sizzle sound effect cause Colin just dropped some flame wait wait wait whoa yeah he's really good he plays a lot of different characters too yes he does that's he is amazing his chaining very amazing go back to it Troy the boys have invaded the wrong category based on false intelligence you know man you remember from the early 2000s Jim Iraq yeah never been there you know go ahead Andy throughout the entire film can you imagine how hard that must have been I mean first of all you have to get the family's permission to exhume the body I don't even know where you would begin with that conversation first oh they were explaining to him that's my favorite thing on awards when the person pretends to be stupid yeah because they didn't you know they didn't want to actually make fun of Freddie Mercury's teeth because Brian May might have been offended by that yeah you know Brian May is just sitting out there he's like you better not make a [ __ ] teeth joke right now well they're the ones that ruined that movie I was reading Oh Brian May Brian May and uh what stay because they just wanted to be about the band and not bring up the Freddy's you know which gay and the AIDS thing too much I mean they brought it in but the movie is very kind it's a very nice movie to everybody involved is the best kind of movie you like that I do that would be fine if they made it good I could see that just wasting that song at the beginning I had to turn it off right what was the song this is somebody to love yeah I think so I mean I told my the best songs and they're just it's over him marching around it's really green growing up nobody liked I liked Queen you know I told Jim they reenacted the entire live aid set at the end of the movie what they did like the full 20 minutes that's all that piece of bagel corny well you don't want this bagel it's a delicious poppy seed delight get eggs yeah it's when a little piece yeah take a little chunk you guys are such great friends I love having it we go way back yeah you're like Alan Arkin and Michael Douglas just the two of you wacky adventures come kick Minsky whatever all right let's go back to it first man is also house studios look for directors first man available then pair of man then team of man then eventually maybe woman right on somebody had to say it Lady Gaga she's like whoa apparently she doesn't get out much no she's a no I've never heard that what is it 1995 I mean I got idiot people hate every day it's commonplace is that edgy I have to believe that some of the people laughing at this joke our laughing at it as in like I can't believe this is happening but the laughing at the joke dollars no you know hey so go away why a lot of money and a good looking they're dumb Colin you make you crazy you make a really bad nose bully they're dumb yes just a bunch of stupid people people laughing it's lines yeah yeah because you have no choice they that you have to put yourself into a spare brainwashed state in certain totalitarian societies right you go okay if I'm gonna survive here I better start thinking this way and living this way yeah in order to survive in Hollywood you just have to submit to the to the way the the thinking to the will of Allah that's right using expressions away sorry mom let me hear yes very good that was that let me get a little rant again I was important directors right on first man if no man available then pair of man then team of man then eventually maybe woman hold on Travis what are you gonna say you look uncomfortable it goes on for so long with the same voice yeah well mainly mainly studios are run by cavemen bad men man woman man she's doing Tim Allen in the 90s the thing the punchline was not clear when she first said that's how Studios also look for direct no right it needed yeah it needed a funny voice and a nice long exposure pair of man you know what a man wasn't available why would a pair of men be available and maybe woman yeah okay yeah a pair of men you know what the Coen brothers should have stood up and said what are you just saying a pair of men with the Coen brothers somebody do the [ __ ] work we did shut up yeah wouldn't that be great they stood up what the [ __ ] did you just say you seen No Country for Old Men yeah you know the marvelous mrs. nasal is nominated again for multiple award it's the show that makes audiences sit up and say wait is this anti-semitic you ever see the marvelous mrs. Mazal no no you nerds how was it ah it's like anything else it's like it looks good and you're like you know the sets are gray looks like the 50s kind of cool idea but then the stand up is [ __ ] there's not a [ __ ] funny line in a show about calm and that's not just that show everything I see what setup I'm like it's all good where's the [ __ ] jokes right where's the good [ __ ] jokes man that's the only value we [ __ ] have right otherwise I don't want to watch anybody and stand up living their life unless you go you know what that person whatever they are but you know what when I'm stage I'm [ __ ] laughing what the [ __ ] right like you watch them live this shitty existence I mean they go on stage and they're not that funny and you're like what we do I get tortured they're all tortured man right I'm [ __ ] want to get to my real self you know then they get on stage and it's like their real self is not funny so it's just it defeats the entire idea of why we've grabbed any value whatsoever yeah it's just an embarrassment cause it's like no no but I don't give a [ __ ] tortured be fine but when you're on say Jake that person's goddamn it has to be fine to be their personal [ __ ] life because it's an excuse to not be funny like hey that person was real guess what Mitch Hedberg he wasn't [ __ ] telling you his real person life he was [ __ ] hilarious right you know I mean whatever it is it doesn't have to be one category but it has to be funny Rock oh my god it makes me mad you don't like some of the just the the drive storytelling of comedy because guess what writing jokes is [ __ ] hard so everybody you know fill in all the [ __ ] around but then on stage time you like oh see that's why it's [ __ ] hard come it can't be funny you know what can sometimes comedians have a responsibility to just speak truth to power you know that is true don't punch down but if it's not now sometimes truth to power is more important absolutely punching up is always more important to me yeah you don't punch down as a philosophy right Jim I can't [Laughter] Darren Criss of Ruth's Chris Steakhouse is here his name's Darren Criss yeah [ __ ] chip joke it really is [ __ ] steakhouse yeah [ __ ] now you're playing for kiss yeah I hate drama you thinking of peanut up we know Peter Criss I don't like that this [ __ ] in the middle of a chip thing so I better explain it to get the laugh you think was it coming either way chip it was chips explaining it you think reached in there and said ship you got explain this one chip I think I think we'll get ahead of you change your chips wrong chip is not an obsessed with kiss Jim is the one who even with the fans to be left you know high and dry the other two middle-aged oh my kiss [ __ ] just chip let him know who he is I know you're talking about chip yeah that would be great to see an actual like a like an episode or like why lights on with chip and Jim's like directing chip right you actually go like that Disney move you like the Pixar movie where you go in the head that Lewis Black was playing anger except it's inside chips head and Jim is controlling everything in the brain or you can do altitude was like a psycho like the movie psycho huh what Jim goes up hey how you doing and he goes up and starts yelling a chip and chips in there good I think it could be - there's a lot of potential yeah yeah Jim early is a horror movie character when you think about he's a [ __ ] murderer yeah it's true so is Jim yeah let's go back to it Darren did you guys see Versace by the way yeah I thought like half the series I think yeah how could you stop watching it it's funny it was this [ __ ] was amazing I thought so too Jim you would love this guy's before he was great he played watch any goddamned this [ __ ] thing's amazing he played the killer he played Andrew Cunanan yeah yeah it was unbelievable he was amazing yeah amazing what this is a great [ __ ] is he nominated or is that yeah I think he was boy Lorillard he won yeah case you had to show DVR'd for us [Laughter] Golden Gloves it's [ __ ] gym you will [ __ ] love this so a comedian shouldn't make certain jokes cuz they're mean but he wins an award for playing a guy who murdered someone great well no I didn't murder multiple people Oh to be fair call just-just-just you're gonna love this [ __ ] thing it's amazing right right but you know I mean but don't make fun of this he didn't make light of it don't be mean he played it in a serious waging right yeah but nice play the guy who murdered a bunch of him he didn't play he's played it funny who's funny yeah he's great he was great way around show he's great I love that most of that stuff what's his name who does that who did Glee and his tuxedo was asinine through the show creator Ryan Murphy does a hell of a good job making TV shows oh yeah he does well you know with this tuxedo well it just bugs me because it's trying to be funny and in 1989 at the MTV Music Awards I tried to be funny and more like wacky tuxedo what you wear and I went out with this girl and she she was disgusted with me why cuz she didn't want to go out with me anyway you need to wear the funny tuxedo outside of the award oh now you gotta go out and she couldn't [ __ ] wait to get rid of me what was the tuxedo I forget her name um when she went as your date she was my date and she was just like I showed up with the tuxedo I saw the face she was like disgusting I just look like a real [ __ ] [ __ ] but you give the [ __ ] what's that no I didn't get to [ __ ] her let's see that I probably wouldn't have got to [ __ ] her but the tuxedo killed kibosh any chance that's when comedy was comedy though when a comedian would walk in and be like you know what I may not get to tell jokes tonight but my suits gonna be hilarious it's funny because I remember seeing Robin when he was in like 1991 wearing suspenders like mime suspenders right and I was like yeah man we don't have to be dressed up the comedian like you know I like these comedians if I could now the earth you know can I start business I used to like fun outfits you know what was fun about your tuxedo what was wacky about it um it was just it was like this it was like that only with yellow it was a floral there's a yellow floral tuxedo yeah when did you realize that it wasn't funny and then it kind of stung when the girl's face just looked disgusted when I came to all you went to pick her up with that yeah we got to present me and Ken over presented to Madonna the UH some award and can tried to give her a kiss I didn't at least I didn't try to kiss her she was like disgusted by us from a game show we were like you know big in the MTV world of course do we have that I would love I love this maybe just do Colin Quinn VMA yeah VMA put Madonna maybe in there there might have been 1990 or 1988 it might have been 1988 it was really early you know yeah wait no I don't see I want to see your tuxedo yeah it's pretty unfortunately Colin Quinn's appearance at the VMAs did not go down on MTV's top 100 no it's unfortunate that's really that's too bad let's watch there was another joke coming up though yeah you look like a million bucks at the SNL thing that wasn't that was a good tuxedo yeah thank you yeah it's true I did look all right let's go back to it but you know enough with the fashion talk this shows about the jokes you're right let's get some laughs man yeah all righty then yeah you're gonna like you remember this bit calm your horse yeah you're gonna like this is you know mind a bit popping into a monologue dude you don't know I prefer it okay good and this bit the good thing about this bit is it it's a 30-second bit that's stretched into four minutes long one yes a long [Applause] and I gotta say I knew Jim Carrey's paintings but I had no idea he had done acting he was really good although I am seeing that Jim Carrey sitting up front tonight in the movie section even though he's nominated for a TV show oh yeah that's not gonna work I'm so sorry Jim but we're gonna have to ask you to vacate the movie section and go sit with the TV folk you're kidding right you know what city much married it's very lucky is that you know yeah you're right Jim that he was miked okay somebody saying when I say the TV folk I don't like the fact that people use folk ironically now write another little [ __ ] thing in comedy the folk it also I blame it all on [ __ ] David Letterman I'm telling you let him in as funny as he was he also brought this folksy irony to comedy that just [ __ ] makes me sick moans you don't like it no I hate it do you like when people call each other sir as like kind of like they're not actually meaning it respectfully there's just like I don't know about that sir um I don't know because we do that in comedy it's such a natural thing we like you sir yeah I mean that's kind of annoying yeah I can't help myself I still do it I mean it's like I say hey guy hey miss yeah you have to say what you do say miss that's a bad thing we say missus yes what I'm saying that hey miss or man yeah but so I know I think I know what you're saying yeah I don't really mean hey sir I mean like the people at bow yes sir that whole [ __ ] org well no sir or like it'll pop up in like when people are kind of having conversations with each other like friends are having conversation for the throw serves in Kevin Smith does that but he's been doing that that's how he's kept watch for his whole life this is why bothers me Kevin Smith was the first person that I noticed doing it and I was like I don't mind when Kevin Smith because him but then all the disciples and all the fans of Kevin Smith yeah starting to pick up on that yes a good point sir but that like well played yeah oh wow it's really good well played kaolin well played two shades another favor well played sir Touche Touche what's he talking about I like to shake hold on I want to say something bad this this this discussion today is expose something you're a square I happen to like to share you're out of the loop are you starting to get annoyed at Jim Norton's irrelevant talk about one thing - Shay's not part of that yes it is it's people who use those stupid expressions well played yes he said well played - Shay you here - Shay in your day to day no but I've heard you stand by that yes I do I think Colin is being a bit of a bully that's exactly what I would say if somebody said lying - shakily but you know I mean I I don't know but either way it's that whole school of like oh yes I mean Smith probably did [ __ ] started but I didn't actually but yeah Kevin Smith wasn't doing it so he copied Letterman and David Letterman the same I love David Letterman I love Kevin Smith I like David but you guys are only like that's basically huh just because you like them and they started and they were organic and it's their thing right doesn't mean we should forgive them it's like saying hey the first the [ __ ] Montreal flight attendant well you know he liked to have unprotected sex in 1978 mr. Ground Zero Touche all right let's try to get through this this model was good I can't believe I liked it more than I thought can't believe but we're going through the whole thing I can't believe it but you're on kidding and that's on TV so yeah even then they have to say you're our hero they can't [ __ ] commit to the baby [ __ ] it's it's positivity man right great for comedy positivity and comedy go together well it's good stuff makes people feel better I just finished the film it's called Sonic the Hedgehog comes out in November Wow well you know come back next year I'm sure we'll be nominated all right I'm going should I take my dinner too I wouldn't want to leave any of my DNA in the film section I see your lips moving but there's a delay see how long as good as Jin long it's long I was hoping for more there is one JEP good good yeah they're not they're not they haven't really driven in a hole by the way now that they've done the nice thing of pointing out that the really important people sit up front as soon as the monologue was over of course Jim Carrey was right back to the front meanwhile poor Lucy hi poor Lucy Liu is on camera in the second section going like what the [ __ ] why would you bring up that all the important people are up front and then show me and it's a joke from a different time TV is bigger than fascinating yes of course it is he's putting up two glasses on his eyeballs like their glasses isn't fair like um binoculars right likes yeah it's good he's a physical guy you saw some props he decided to go for it yeah you know yes decided to go for it there's just he said there's still some juice left in this Barry [Laughter] [Music] [Laughter] now I I know we're up here joking but on a serious note good this year we saw black panther crazy rich Asians feel street could talk okay we're starting to we're starting to skirt into the area that we've already heard earlier on in the show do you want to go all the way I do you do it so you wanted stuff you wanting here Sandra Oh's heartfelt speech again oh my god yeah did you hear Jim I did even though you didn't watch this no I played him just one little clip it was until you got here that we decided it was necessary to play the entire goddamn opening monologue for an hour again now does does rollin ever come in and just go like hey guys you know like just pick it up like get rid of this model move on to something right he'll come in and say like a Colin came in to promote something I don't think he wants to sit here for an hour watching the Globes from well he's right in that you guys are very rude to not promote me but I this is much more important I agree I haven't been invited to assure you neither have I to tell you the truth I got invited to Mike Birbiglia show Nach I did show my text at me invited me yeah you guys we invited the opening night if you want to go to stupid opening lines opening night two weeks you would I we would have gotten invited doing reviews now that's not true we haven't invited anyone to opening night yes all right I got me an invitation should be a big event I'd like to go I'd like to go around the corner from the cellar yeah at Minetta perfect location sure is it seems like the place to see and be seen so so yeah I'm so happy to be around they're going to the cellar you like yours better than the cherry lane I love it the best of its but my dream was always to just work as close to the cellar as possible but look we can get to sell it's all it's all family life we can't get too deep into promoting Colin's new project because we're not down with the monologue yet but we haven't even said it so don't even worry about it okay yeah it was around the corner from the cellar let's go all right let's continue on with the monologue I'm at the Blue Note [Laughter] [Applause] they're not just here tonight because they resonated with audiences Hollywood often ignores they're here because they told stories that resonated with everyone and that is truly a beautiful thing Wow Andy can I just say that you just read all of my lines off the teleprompter you know you could tell it's real because in real life she would have said off the teleprompter she wouldn't have just said you just read all my lines yeah it's important that she would have made sure that if you read all her line she did inform the audience that a teleprompter the writing that we use here the writing is good it's it's solid oh my god I just totally whitewashed your speech that's good right oh my god what just the joke was it's an amazing learning experience yeah yeah you know yeah I always said why have fun with it you know yeah yeah this is this is the space just what I just want to know as long as they understand yeah as long as they're not shocked right when you know Bob the tool and die maker from southwest Missouri isn't rushing out to see the latest projects when they do this kind of stuff right whitewashing yeah I was I got turpentine he's trying to scrub the [ __ ] white paint off his goddamn hands right now right working 80 hours and they going whitewashing that's not how it happens but what a learning experience right sorry two different ideas of society I had never felt like it was so out of touch as it was last night like it's like the guys are both wrong the left for me personally the level of out of touch nests that Hollywood has decided to double did - yeah they're doubling down they're strengthening the bubble that they all live in instead for a second for a second they were like maybe let's explore what's outside and they're like no no we don't like that out there we don't like they're they're all calling us out as pedophiles and whatnot let's strengthen the bubble let's say that we're saving you from pedophiles not we are the pedophiles yeah and let's make it let's make it a double thick yeah exactly and that's why it's doubly disappointing that you thought the Jeff Bridges monologue was just some character that he played in you know in the Coen Brothers movie instead of just part of that a stoned version of this idiocy what the dude was just stoned you know like oh the dude is giving a speech that movie bugs me to watch it I can't help that movie I love the Coen brothers and that you know Big Lebowski Mouse it was okay exactly had some funny scenes John Turturro was amazing but it was like I shouldn't be putting the biblical standards that it is should be it should be number like 11 of Coen Brothers movies what's your favorite Coen Brothers movie no let's coursing okay Fargo it deserves the yeah it's Barton Fink okay I don't think I can understand hating it but when you lived it when you spend any time in LA you're like oh god that's exactly what I was going through there okay okay starting to be boring let's pick it up list them all or we could go back to this yeah yes stage tonight because because I wanted to be here to look out into this audience and witness this moment of change and I'm not pulling myself I'm not fooling myself next year could be different it probably will be yeah next year what the white man is gonna clamp down next year eyelet Aryan the white man is coming this moment is real trust me it is real because I see you like that one moment that laugh whoever did that laugh I want to see every movie they ever do we I want to support whoever left we had 11 minutes of awful and that one moment which is one person in that audience acknowledging what that last 11 minutes was and look at the look ready she can't believe someone just laughed at her dumb actor moment yeah exactly right because it's just that her actor teary eyes I'm looking at you kiss she's portraying emotion she's not feeling portraying emotion emotion right now this moment is real trust me it is real because I see the greatest thing you've ever seen in your life that laughs this is so beautiful and [ __ ] and offensive to her so offensive she was sitting there going okay this is my moment this whole ten minutes of lunacy is gonna always gonna all culminate in my moment this will be the moment tomorrow everybody's gonna say Sandra Oh speaks for the people that don't have a voice except for one person that goes yeah I want to know who or is it left and so and I want to know what the person next to how they hard they nudge serious whoever whoever was laughing given the Cecil B DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award next year kids what a great laugh yes have you did more to Hollywood than anyone ever could all these phases of change and now so will everyone else what and you see this where they're painting to all the women of color in the own ass yeah that's a girl from Roma wow that was great actually I was really good that was really really meaningful yeah that's how the show started and I said I'm sitting there out of some feeling of having to do this out of some feeling of obligation yes I'm gonna sit here for that it went three and a half hours I'm gonna stay here until 11:30 tonight and I'm gonna watch this whole goddamn show yeah well you were right yeah it was anyway it's it's a cultural benchmark yeah yeah

Channel: Jim and Sam Show

Views: 198,512

Keywords: Colin Quinn, Jim Norton, Sam Roberts, Jim and Sam, Faction Talk, Sirius XM, 103, Golden Globes, monologue, comedy, hollywood, edgy, being woke, ricky gervais, a star is born, andrew dice clay, bohemian rhapsody, freddie mercury, judas priest, rockstar, mark whalberg, amy adams, eggs, sandra oh, lorne michael, comedian, tough crowd, antacid, Jim Norton & Sam Roberts

Id: wNVVgmk1AIE

Length: 76min 34sec (4594 seconds)

Published: Thu Jan 10 2019