Christ-Centered Relationships Pt 2

I want to introduce you guys to a friend of mine his name is Francis and ice from Uganda and I first met Francis a couple years ago over a Bethany village many of you guys know of Bethany village is a place that one of the places that's most dear to my heart because I first went there five years ago when there was nothing it was just this jungle and we saw these kids running around with no food no clothes nothing no education and I came back and told the church about it and said we got to do something about this and and you guys started giving and we started building homes for these orphans we started building schools you know classrooms it just and it's this whole developed area and Francis almost forgot your name he he he's he's the one that kind of directs that the homes over there and since he was out here I just wanted him to give you an update of what's going on over there so hello friends it's great to meet you all today I heard a lot about you and we've done so many things together with Cornerstone but I'd never met so many of you I didn't know you would have any my name is Francis somebody I know so sorry for the destruction I work with Africa renewal ministries and African all ministries together with our partners support 5,000 children or over 5,000 children in Uganda orphans and destitute I want to thank you all for your friends who are supporting a child or two or three or doing anything to help us in Africa in your ministries I want to appreciate you we now are up to 18 sponsorship programs in in Uganda as as a whole and I walk out of Bethany village as pastor was saying and in Bethany village we have a clinic we have a new structure praise the Lord the nurse just moved in she takes care of us the children in the school and all of our staff and the people walk in the camping area on the farm we amount to about 700 people and the gnostics good care of us so anyway I walk in the homes so I oversee the homes administration so I my children call me daddy so I'm a daddy of 177 children in 11 homes that we have we would not do all this we would not have their living homes would not have the 5,000 children the 600 on sponsorship in Bethany alone if it wasn't for your support and we want to appreciate you all Bethany village is special to Cornerstone in a way that most of the children at Bethany village even in the community are sponsored by you and we feel so special and we want to appreciate you the children in the homes are still taking good care of by their moms each of the houses have a mom and we want to give them a break you know they work 24/7 they don't have a break because we do not have staff accommodation so we want to move as many staff members to the compound so that the children get extra care when their moms take a day off you know what it is when you don't what it is like when you don't take a day off so we want to give them a break and we've studied we've built one staff house and we want to build many more and the homes right now with the recession in the US and you called it recession right and the inflation back home the high food expenses sometimes we don't keep up with buying as much as we need so we can use additional support for those homes as well to be able to take good care of our children they are growing very fast so they eat quite to mind anyway on top of overseeing the homes I also by the way let me just take a break here before I stop talking about the homes I want to thank you all for supporting each of the children supporting each of the homes some of you have come and done hands-on work constructing schools homes drawing pictures for my kids in the houses you've made everything turn out great and I wanted to just stop here and say thank you very much I didn't want to the other thing is friends you got together some of you got together I don't remember who and who got together Tammy knows but you got together and raised money to buy my children clothing I want to appreciate you for that thank you very much so on top of the homes I do wheelchair ministry that I call the Father's heart ministry and in that we reach out to people who cannot afford buying wheelchairs I had a rough time growing up I spent about nine years without the wheelchair so I crawled on my hands and knees for nine years without a wheelchair when I got one praise the Lord I went to school and I can be able now to speak to you because I wouldn't have wanted in a good school but anyway so many people out in Uganda do not have wheelchairs and the public looks at them as second-class they're beggars or whatever they call them and so I go out there and I will choose two people who kind of fold them speak to the parents who have children with disabilities and also talk to the people with disabilities I look at them with a great potential you know God created each of us with a purpose and I want to see them achieve the purpose for which God created them to be you know when I learnt to accept myself for who God made me to be as a sign of God I wanted to stand in my position accept myself as a son of God and look at the blessings that the Lord has brought to me and in turn bless other people and you know I have so many weaknesses like any one of you but usually when we look at our weaknesses they pull us down and we forget about the potential and strength that God has put in each one of us but when we focus on our strengths and with the Lord's help walk at them with all our energy and let the Lord work on our weaknesses we're going to change the world in a few minutes before we know it but the Lord bless you all thank you all for your support and partnership we love you all I bring greetings from my pastor Pastor Peter is not to be here with me so he greets you all loves you all and he sent me to thank you and I have done that thank you for listening um first service use tell us about how you know they've been getting wheelchairs up to northern Uganda - a lot of these people whom the rebels have maimed and and everything else and it just is just to me I get so excited to just be a part of that and to know that you know what cornerstone is a big part of that and one of the things - when I saw Francis the first time was he was giving us a tour of all the new homes in Bethany if you know Bethany village it's it's it's on a hill and and I'm like panting and he's in a wheelchair cruising up this hill no one's helping him he's got these off-road tires on his wheelchair in Uganda and he's just flying up this hill I wasn't going to complain but it was hard to keep up with him but when it was all done I just thought man you know I just I see this this guy jumping you know going all over the place in this village and so we decided we're going to buy him a quad and so when he goes back he doesn't have to because if you've seen the conditions this guy's been cruising up and down in for last two and a half years you'd be amazed and they'll just make his job a little bit easier now he can get back and forth a little bit better but I I would just I just love this guy and I want to pray for him and I want to just pray that God continues to use him not just to give the basic essentials to these people but I mean as we're all encouraged I mean just a motivating guy you see the Holy Spirit in him and I want other people to see that same spirit and and also to believe that God created them to do great things on this earth so would you guys join me in a word of Prayer father I thank you for my brother Francis and I just thank you for just the joy I see in his life and god I just pray that everyone who sees this and watches him today would long for that and want that and have that in you and I pray that he's goes back to Uganda father that you would do have do even greater things through him I thank you for using him as your mouthpiece and I just thank you for the way that he loves those kids and his port is life into them and I thank you for the way that he's reaching out to others with disabilities I just pray that you keep him strong keep him focused on what the enemy don't let the devil tempt him or discourage him in Jesus name I pray amen god bless you brother all right um this this week I just asked you guys to keep someone in your prayers and that's there's a there's a church in town faith faith Christian Church and their pastor Glenn Jackson is a friend of mine and we went to seminary together actually took some classes together and real encouraging toward Cornerstone just he's been one of those really faithful supporters been a pastor here in simi valley for 28 years and he had an aneurysm on Friday and and he died Friday night and so be praying for that church because that's a that's a pretty huge thing you lose your pastor of 28 years and it's a real family over there and they have been nothing but supportive of Cornerstone it's not you know there's never been any jealousy or bad blood between he just really loves us and prays for us he walks by my house every morning and you know it just in his morning walk and tells me man every time I want to walk by your house I just pray for your family I pray for your church I thank God for what he's doing through cornerstone and so that's a big loss for for them I also ask you to pray for his son-in-law Lance amazing timing cos Lanza came over about a year ago moved out here to be their youth pastor and to go to eternity Bible College here and he was actually in my preaching class and this guy is so amazingly gifted as a teacher and and you know younger guy very new to ministry but he's probably gonna be taking on this task paying with the elders you know decide of of leading this church over there and so we were talking on the phone last night in fact he's preaching this morning you know and and that's tough for him he's preaching right now in fact I just thought about that they have a level clock service and it may be we just pray for him right now let us bow forward prayer father lift up Lance to you right now and I thank you God that you've gifted him so greatly as a leader and as a teacher God right now as he's speaking think of him Lourdes he has lost his mentor his friend his boss his father-in-law got may he preach with passion conviction love fill him with your spirit that's very second and God used him as a powerful leader here in simi valley may we as a church come alongside that man and just support him and love him I thank you for Glenn and for letting him be on this earth and here in Simi Valley for all these years for his faithfulness I pray for his wife Nicki I just pray for that family as they continue to move on and serve you I pray for the funeral service this Saturday that it would be a time that honors you and brings glory to your name in Jesus name I pray amen as always it's always hard because you know you feel like here's a guy I'm partnering with in the city and we're after the same thing and then and the Lord takes them home and there's a sense in which ah man that was a it's almost like you're at war I mean we are at war so the Bible describes it it's like a fellow soldier you know in a sense going down but you know praise God for lance and what God is doing in his life and and as a church we're just gonna do everything we can to support those guys and come alongside of them and I believe great great things are in store for them but you know it always gets in my mind you know where I think wow so he's just walking along one day and boom this aneurysm out of nowhere and here's a guy who went to school with do the same thing as and you just go why him why not me God's timing anyways please please keep that that family in prayer and that church family in prayer well this morning I'm actually really really excited about this message we're talking about Christ centered relationships if you remember two weeks ago Lisa and I started this series and we're going to continue on it and this week where we're talking specifically about how to display put on display Jesus Christ in your marriage and let me just say right off the bat some of you will not like this message I can pretty much start every weekend that way can I okay yep but this one specifically okay some of you just really will not like this message and here's why here's the reason the reason is is because I'm convinced that that probably everyone's room you you really really really really really like Jesus but if you were honest with yourself you don't really want to become like him you admire his humility we all do but do you really want to be that humble I mean you think it's beautiful I think we all think it's beautiful the son of God would get down on his knees and wash the feet of his disciples we think that's beautiful but is that really the goal of your life and as your life headed in that direction of servanthood you're thankful that Jesus was spit on and abused and that he took it but you would never let that happen to you you loved the fact that he laid down his rights but you're going to spend your life fighting for yours and defending yours you praise Him you sing songs and you love him because he loved you enough to suffer during his whole time on this earth for your sake but you're going to make sure you have fun while you're down here and that you have a good time in short you think Jesus is a great Savior but he's not a great role model and I say that because a lot of times I'll give messages and I and it's about the character of Jesus Christ and the way we ought to follow that character and it's met with this they know I can have this I can have that and I just got to stop and say wait a second is Jesus Christ your role model think this through is it the desire of your heart that you would be this servant and lay down your life for someone else the crazy thing about all of this is that first John 2:6 says whoever claims to live him must walk as Jesus did let me read it again whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did it's not it's not an optional thing it's not this optional thing well maybe I can be a Christian and in my everything about Jesus but my life will look nothing like his no John says no whoever claims to live in him whoever claims have Jesus in him must walk as Jesus did is Jesus attractive I think you'd say yes Jesus attractive but attractive in such a way that you would want to follow in his footsteps do you look like Jesus Christ it's it's it's a you know Paul says and in 1st Corinthians 11:1 he goes follow my example as I follow Jesus Christ he goes follow me watch me because I'm going to live just like Jesus Christ I want to become like him I want people to see him in me and I want you to just start acting like me because I'm going to act like Jesus that's that's Christianity that's what means to follow Christ that's what Matt was talking about a couple weeks ago that the question for today is not are you a good Christian because we have so diluted this word Christian that we don't even know what it means anymore the question is is are you a good Christ are you a good Christ when people watch you to just go man oh that's that's just like Jesus Christ he's just like Christ she's just like Christ I see that same humility I mean she just lays down on her life for someone else he just lazy just sacrifice a serve and as we talk about marriage the question is not hey are you guys happy you guys like your marriages no the question is is as people watch you interact with your spouse do they see Jesus Christ in you do they see Jesus Christ in the way that I serve my wife do my neighbors look on and watch the way I serve my wife and go man I've never seen anything like that I said well my role model is Jesus and yeah while he was lord over all the earth and he's the creator of everyone he he served he suffered he sacrificed for the sake of someone else and as people observe my wife you know her desires that whether people would look at her and go wow you know what no one treats their husband with that much respect you well actually you should seen the way Jesus was with the father and how he submitted to the Father's will it's the way the church is supposed to submit to Christ and it's the way that I do that with my husband and somehow in our christ to have in our marriages to have christ-centered marriages so people see Jesus Christ in me people see Jesus Christ in her that's a desire and my wife's going to really speak this morning and we realized that she really needs to take the bulk attack girls just talk a lot and not kidding now she just had so many great things to say as I kind of you know what you just take the rest of the message and I'll figure out my part next week but before she comes up I want to show you a video and the reason why I'm showing this video is because I'm talking about very serious issues we talked about a couple weeks ago we're talking about again this week and these are foundational to Christianity not just to marriage but my concern in talking about these hard issues in marriage is that that you may get the impression that that I look at marriage as it's mechanical you must serve me I must do this for you you know type of thing and that there's no romance that there's no life and then I'm anti romance or something like that when in reality I'm very romantic and no it's just this whole idea of of what to me you know I'm supposed to paint a picture of Jesus Christ and you got to remember God is the author of romance and you read that Bible and you realize it is the greatest love story ever written and he is the greatest lover who has ever existed and that book is about a God who is passionate and full of life and God created marriage and I believe it supposed to be a very beautiful loving fun passionate everything and I don't want you to think that we're missing out on that because the truth is is unless we have this life and passion we're not an accurate reflection of our God who created these emotions and who created marriage and romance and love and so this is just a quick clip from a video I made for her few years ago on her birthday I kind of surprised her with so as she comes up you can watch this I saw love and the first time you touched all this time yeah looks like me look how far we've come my baby we might I took the long way we get this they say Oh or just okay still together I still do still the one I'm too - still the one still the one is still the one I kiss a better Whidbey glad we didn't listen yeah we would be okay so there is romance in our marriage and I am willing to make a fool of myself for the sake of my wife and I'm gonna let her take over we also made a fool of me by putting that clip of me sleeping on the train I said you notice how they don't know what to say they're like whoa let's cheat doing noise our mouths open could you raise that up alone on ado then serve you thank you that's how I know get you anything else no that's right thank you I'm just gonna move a little way from you it's a little intimidating seeing him out of the corner of my eye if he's not like nodding I'm going oh maybe I'm not doing that great um okay so talking about submission is actually really exciting to me I love talking about it because I feel like it's one of the few distinct ways that we as Christian women can really stand apart from the world it's one of the few ways that causes other people to look at us and look at our marriages and say why would that woman treat her husband in that way why isn't she battling and fighting for her position or her leadership and I feel like it's one of the ways that we can really show off Christ and and attract people to the message of the gospel by the way in which we submit to our husbands as we talked about a couple weeks ago it's a message that is exact opposite of everything that the world is trying to tell us the exact opposite of what every magazine you pick up or every television show that you watch as a woman their message is always look for power get your independence control you know they saturate you with these messages of power and independence and control which is the exact opposite of how Christ has called us to live in humility and we cannot forget that the very core of the gospel is to die to ourselves I think it bears repeating we have to die to ourselves and we have to first live in total submission to God if you don't first have a commitment to Christ a respect for the Word of God a desire to really obey all that he has commanded you really can't even move on to any other subject if there's something in your heart that is resisting submission and surrender to God and what he has commanded of all of us as believers if you haven't been able to give that up yet we can't even move on to talk about marriage or any other subject because it's really putting the cart before the horse so to speak it always has to start back there with that foundation jesus said if you love me you will obey what I command John 14:15 and he has commanded us as women to submit to our husbands I'm going to read from Ephesians chapter 5 starting in verse 22 wives submit to your husband's as to the Lord for the husband is the head of the wife as Christ as the head of the church his body of which he is the Saviour now as the church submits to Christ so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything you've probably heard this passage many times and maybe if you're a believer for many years you hear okay I know I'm supposed to submit to my husband I feel like submission for me was kind of like parenting do you know how you you always know exactly what to do as a parent until you have your own children you've got parenting all figured out so you have kids of your own and the Lord humbles you and you recognize just how weak you are and how much of the Lord you need in your life and I feel like the Lord did that for me with submission as well I really wasn't one of those women that was had a real hard time even just hearing the word I didn't think of submission as an S word I kind of agreed with the whole idea of it and knew it I grew up in the church but it was a whole nother thing to flesh it out within marriage and one of my first opportunities that the Lord gave me to learn to submit was our very first Christmas together and a girlfriend and I had gone out shopping to buy decorations for our home and this was going to be a pretty exciting first Christmas decorating our home together and so we each found these darling little animated Santa Clauses they were probably from the floor about this high up and they lit up and then sang a song and you know had the big white fluffy beard it was very cute and so we each bought our Santa Claus and I you know we brought them home and I'm all excited to set it up on the mantel at our fireplace and everything was great until Francis came home and he says what is that I'm like well look Santa Claus honey I don't want Santa Claus in our home or on the on the fireplace and I I was just mortified first of all and what made it worse was he says I really would like you to take the Santa Claus back now first of all you guys remember from a couple weeks ago that at the beginning of our marriage is when he decided to start the church so I was the one that was working I was the one bringing home the bacon and so in my mind it was like you were gonna ask me to take my Santa Claus that I bought with my money and I have to take Santa Claus back to the store what made it worse was he actually had a really wonderfully godly thought behind it as he just said you know I'm not against Santa Claus I just really don't want it to be the focal point of our home and the big animated dancing Santa Claus is just a little bit more of a focal point than I'd like it to be and you'd think at that point as the wonderful godly woman that I was going to be I would have said I perfectly understand your heart but I was thinking oh great so you think I'm not a godly wife and I just hate God and I love Santa Claus like what are you saying and so you know I pack the Santa Clause back up and I take it back to the store and the guy's like Oh is there anything wrong with it and like no there's something wrong with my husband but Santa Claus is fine oh it took such it took so many so many days and such tears and such silliness now of course when I look back when the Lord said submit to your husband and in everything yes it included taking the Santa Clause back and for me that was just a real knock on my pride but it was such a great gift from the Lord really at the very beginning of our marriage to really understand what it meant to listen to my husband to hear what he had to say and to be willing to follow through with it you know what with a scripture that we just read in Ephesians 5 it does say submit to your husband's in everything but I want to also be very careful to explain something when it says in everything it is not talking about the times when your husband is asking you to sin we are all under the ultimate umbrella of God's Authority our husbands included and anytime that your husband steps outside of that umbrella of authority whether it be to cheat on your tax return or to engage in pornography or to get drunk on the weekend I don't know what it may be but any time he steps outside of God's ultimate authority that's when you are able to say honey as much as I love and respect you and want to honor you I must obey God rather than man like it says in acts 5:29 I think it's very obvious that the more godly your husband is the easier it would be to submit to him I think that was an obvious truth that we could all agree with I know there are some of you who are just thinking you know it's easy for you because your husband's a pastor and you know what I'm not going to lie I do thank God for a godly husband I do not take it for granted that my husband tries to make decisions that honor God it doesn't make it easy because I'm still a sinful person very filled with pride and I'm married to a sinful person I know that's hard for you guys to believe it doesn't make it easy but it does make it easier in fact I just want to take a little time out for those of you who are not married and say this is why you must take this to heart now you must realize what God is going to call you to so that you can make a very wise choice when you are choosing the person that you are dating and eventually marrying if you see a man who is making decisions like we talked about a couple weeks ago based on the will of God the Word of God you see integrity in his life and his walk with Christ then you're going to know that it will at least be easier to come under his leadership it will not always be easy I'm not trying to paint that picture but it will be easier which also leads to the idea that there are those of you where you are in a situation where it is not easy if you are that person I just want to say to you that I have enough faith for the both of us I really do feel like I wish I could look you in the eyes and then fuse my faith and my hope into you that God does know exactly what it's like to be married to your husband and he also knows the beautiful woman of God that you can become regardless of how godly or ungodly he is I read a mother Theresa quote this week I had to take my kids to the infirmary a couple times at this camp that we were all at and it was wonderful because it was strapped right across from the open doorway as I sat with my kids and it says I know God will never give me more than I can handle I just wish he didn't trust me so much you ever feel like God trusts you way too much don't forget that every hardship and trial in your life that is not a direct consequence of your own sinful actions has been entrusted to you by God and also hear me in this it that doesn't mean that even in our own sinful actions God cannot turn and cause all things to work together for his good as we repent and move forward but listen to what I'm saying every hardship and trial in your life has been entrusted to you by God he has trusted you he trusts you with the husband that you have been given I want to read another passage of Scripture it's in 1st Peter chapter 3 if you feel like you're in need of some great encouragement I feel like the book of first Peter would be good for you ladies chapter 3 is another passage that deals with wives and husbands and it says wives in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that if any of them do not believe the word they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives I'm going to read it again wives in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that if any of them do not believe the word they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives first of all how brilliant of the Lord to take away the power of our words in this passage because like Francis said we ladies can sometimes get a little running at the mouth right I know I can we always hear that actions speak louder than words I say that to my kids all the time but I think half the time we're probably talking as we hear that let me ask you something does your husband see the purity and reverence in your life does he see a gentle and quiet spirit that's precious in the sight of God like it says a little further down in that passage does he see behavior that is imitating Christ like Francis said does your husband look at you and is he able to see Christ in you your husband will find it much easier to love and care for you in a godly way when you are a godly submissive wife when there is purity and reverence in your life in the same way that your mind wants to turn to you know if he was just a little more godly it would be so much easier to submit to him were to love him or whatever it may be don't forget that in the same way your husband will find it much easier to love and care for you when you are a godly submissive wife the great thing about doing what's right even when no one else is or in spite of someone else's actions is that first and foremost you look the most like Christ and like Francis said is that your ultimate goal because this is one of the biggest opportunities that God gives to us to look like Christ is when someone does not deserve our kindness our love our affection and we give it to them anyway it's like in Luke chapter 6 when there's when he's talking about loving your enemies and he's saying what credit is it to you that you love those that love you the ones that are easy to love that's that's not credit to you because even the non-believers would do that we're all naturally going to be very kind and nice to people who are kind and nice to us but where the rubber meets the road where we really get an opportunity to be Christ is when we do what's right regardless of how that other person is treating us when we love and submit even when they don't deserve it if Francis's responses and actions were my only motivation for doing what's right I'd be in a real mess because he's a he's not always going to motivate me to do what's right would you agree with that your husband will not always motivate you to love and submit to him and your husband will not always deserve your respect but please hear me on this God has given them a position of authority over us and we need to respect that position even when the person does not deserve it I think sometimes that can help us as ladies get our wrap our minds around this because it's very easy to say well he doesn't he doesn't deserve respect he's this kind of a person and he's that kind of a person and I and I realized that but God has placed him in a position of authority over you and there is a time when you have got to respect that position that God has given to him regardless of how much or how well he deserves it our motivation is always a need to honor God a need to be holy it's a need to be more and more like Christ that will motivate us every time if that's what we desire not them you know because there will be times when yeah he's being pretty cool and nice and then I'm pretty motivated to be cool and nice but if we keep our our ultimate motivation our ultimate goal where it should be on the author and perfecter of our faith that will motivate us every time the great thing is is what we usually want to go to is straight to the benefit like I just want my husband to be different towards me to act differently towards me but I feel like again it's it's flip-flopping it if we first make our goal about honoring and serving God it will naturally have an impact on your husband your behavior will have an impact on him and the added benefit the side benefit is that most likely your husband will be drawn to you he will treat you kind er I think you're going to be hard-pressed to find a man who does not soften his heart towards you when he sees a pattern of humility and gentleness and love so at this point I feel like maybe there's a little part of some of you that's saying you know what does this mean do I do I just have to have no say in any of the decisions that affect our family am I just supposed to speak quiet and say yes sir to everything that that they are asked of me first I want to say you we do have to realize that the ultimate decision maker in your home is your husband but I want to say don't underestimate the influence of a godly woman God has given you to your husband as his helpmate it's not good for your husband to be by himself it's not good for man to be alone God did create a helper suitable for him for Adam for your husband and your rich ladies you need to be for your husband and not against your husband and your husband will will be able to benefit from all of your input but only when he knows that you are for him and you are coming from a heart that is saying I am your helpmate I want to help you to make decisions that are right I want to give you all the wisdom and in an input that I have so that you can make the ultimate great decision for all of us there will be times when your husband's making decisions that you don't agree with but let me just say if you have come to him in such a humble way as to say okay honey I'm going to give you my perspective on this whole thing maybe it's that you're moving out of state you know your husband wants to move to Texas and you're feeling like it's just not the right thing so you come to him well thought out at a good time and you lay it all out on the line and maybe there's even some scriptures that you bring in for those of you who have believing husbands I will say that if you bring scripture to a non believing husband sometimes that can be a turn-off to them usually you want to appeal to their their moral side if it's a decision that's dealing with more of a moral issue or or if it's just something like a move you would be maybe talking about finances of resources or ideas or thoughts about work but what I'm trying to say is you could come to him and and give him all of the wisdom that God has placed into your heart in your mind tell him your heart explained to him what you're feeling and why the where submission comes in is where you're able to say this is how I feel about it but I'll go along with whatever you decide with a good attitude because no husband wants to drag their wife kicking and screaming even though they feel like this is the right decision it's no fun to have a wife that just feels like dead weight that they've got to pull along please don't use manipulation in that way to change your husband's mind because then you are acting outside of God's will your husband is accountable to God for the decisions that he makes to me that is a very weighty position to be in if he makes a decision with the wrong motives and you can see it so clearly you don't have to stress out about it because God knows your husband's heart and he will hold your husband accountable for the decisions that he makes but he will be holding you accountable for the way in which you pray and provide all the information and speak lovingly and before your husband and in the end say ok God I will submit to my husband and recognize it for now this is your will for us even though I don't see how it could be the right thing that's trusting in your Savior because it isn't about but if we but that's worrying too much about a person and the temporal and we need to be recognizing that God could be working through your husband in ways that you do not recognize or understand the very safest place for you to be is in the will of God and the will of God for you is to submit to your husband if you run outside of that you are not in the safety net anymore and you're running on your own there's so many different circumstances France and I were talking yesterday about how hard it is to even broach some of these subjects because every marriage is different everybody has their own issues and decisions and and we can't address them all we can address you know the broad and I know it's important to talk about some of the nuts and bolts of submission and our roles and how it we flesh it out in our everyday marriages we do need to have homes that run in an organized and godly way but I just want to end with this whole thought that I feel like my perspective has changed so much in the last you know almost 15 years of marriage and teaching that excellent life class you know year after year after year and focusing so much in on the role of a wife and the submission of a wife and I feel like God has just kind of pulled me back a little bit and said don't you realize that it's it's so much more about just letting go and serving and being like Christ and dying to yourself this is stuff I've called all of you as my believers to do and to be I want you all to act like Christ I want you all to deny yourselves I want you all to serve one another and to put on love above all else to be humble and to be servants and just to be Christ and I think submission flows naturally out of that mindset and you know I think I've asked a few people over the years who have come through with their kids that are so much older and I think you know tell me tell me what you did to raise such a wonderful son or daughter and do you know that every single one of them does not give me a specific well you've got to do this you've got a home school them you've got to put them into this class no they all say you need to follow Christ you need to be Jesus to them you need to pray and you need to trust God is going to work and you know there's a part of me that just wants to I want the list you know I want the a plus B equals C but that's not how it is in the Christian life and and even in our marriages if you want to be an excellent wife if you want a good marriage then stay close to Jesus walk with God be filled with the spirit walk every day wanting to know where do you want me to go Jesus like he's talked about so many weeks ago just being filled with the spirit that is what is going to transform your marriage yes I know we have to understand our place and deal with the fact that we have to submit but in the end this is about so much more than that try to walk as Jesus walked and then you will be the wife that he wants you to be I just I she said it all I mean I loved what she said as far as if you really make it your ambition your desire to follow Jesus Christ and to be like Jesus Christ then you really won't have an issue with these things and same thing with the stuff that I'm talking about next week is I talked about guys and and talk about our roles as husbands and his father's and and for children is this whole idea if you're following Jesus Christ this stuff is going to be fine it's it's it's stuff that you go yeah that's the way Jesus was he I mean I just just remember the picture of Christ and I and I wanted us to close on this picture of Christ let me think about it Jesus Jesus was sitting on a throne think about this in heaven as the creator of the whole universe and he leaves this place where all these millions of angels are worshipping him adoring him he leaves the comforts of that and comes down to this tiny planet that's on this universe and takes the form of a man so he goes from that to this okay and not just the form of a man but the form of a servant going around washing people's feet healing people taking care of the sick loving them even even loving the people that were going to betray him and then he's on a cross as people are spitting on him beating him nailing him to this cross hurling insults at him all because he loved you and said I will go through all of this because I love you I will go through all of this so that I will pay for everything you did wrong now I'm guessing that most of us in this room love that story that is the most beautiful story in the world but my question is is do you want to imitate it do you want to live that type of life where you sacrifice and suffer for other people because Jesus says once you lose your life like that that's when you're going to find it and he says I did this for the joy set before me see us as followers of Christ it literally means we follow Jesus Christ and we consider other people more important than ourselves that very God very God the Creator would allow his creation to to nail him to a cross that's the picture that's the model and I know that's not attractive to a lot of it's attractive to you as far as that's great that he did that but it's not attractive in the sense if I want to be that humble I want to be that giving I want to be that sacrificial and suffer for the sake of others that means I do that for my wife she does that for me and we want to show Christ that way you know and anything let me just say and talk about my wife as she she's left um what she's talking about here and one of things I love about her is she's saying stuff that so many people will hate but she doesn't care um it's the Word of God she's going to lay it out and I'm almost a little nervous of you know knowing how certain people gonna respond but she's just like you know that's the Word of God and that's the way Jesus lived his life that's why I'm going to live my life and same thing I mean that's that's the way we ought to be but I want you to know it really is the way she lives her life and and she mentioned about you know early on in marriage and and stuff like that but let me tell you something else about early on in marriage as you can tell I mean she's a gifted woman she's not this woman they're just like whatever would her you know I mean she's got some gifts and and I first met her because she's a singer and she st. came in saying this solo at this place I was working and I'm going are you kidding me you know just the voice obviously her looks everything I'm just like haha you know but I just remember early on in the marriage right after we started this church some record producers were looking at her which was her lifelong dream and and when they offered her the contract she looks at this contract and she just knew she goes if I pursue this I'm not going to be able to help you pursue this cornerstone Church and and for her to lay down and say you know what I just feel like we'd be going in different directions and I believe that my job is to help you pursue what you want and you know humbling that is for a guy to hear that from his wife that she's going to lay down her dreams and everything else to help me pursue what I think God wants me to pursue and you see that's once one sees that you go man I've never seen that like no you have you saw that in Jesus Jesus who who says you know what father not my will but yours be done you saw it in him see that's what we're after is for someone to see Lisa and say well I see Jesus no one else acts that way but Jesus did and I want that in my life as well and and and I want you to understand this this call to follow Jesus every week I mean this morning we're just the most beautiful baptisms last service but it was this real picture of people saying you know what I'm done being I'm done that's a picture of baptism is when you join yourself with Jesus Christ when you decide to follow Jesus it's like what Lisa says you're dying to yourself you're saying you know I'm done being Francis Chan and I'm going to rise up I'm coming out of this water filled with the Holy Spirit and that Spirit of God is going to help me to walk like Jesus walked I'm no longer Francis I'm Christian I'm Christ and I want people to see Christ as I live I'm no longer Lisa Chan I'm going to rise up and I'm gonna be Christ and the Bible says when you die to yourself like that that's when you're gonna find life I mean I like I told you man I love my family I love our marriage I you know and so many of the ways of going about it are so different from the way world teaches but the truth is is those side benefits is it really does lead us to having those fulfill filling marriages and lives that God wants us to have

Channel: Chester Yee

Views: 273,006

Keywords: googlevideo

Id: gankzqrIipQ

Length: 55min 42sec (3342 seconds)

Published: Sat Apr 23 2011