[Music] [Applause] [Music] I don't actually know why your son would want to be a Navy SEAL after spending 23 years doing it but uh we can talk about that all right so uh I'm 45 years old I just graduated from 23 years of being a Navy SEAL I would like to say it's retired but I'm busier now than I was before so I don't know what retirement means uh I say that just to allude to the fact that what I'm going to attempt to do today you've not seen before I'm going to leave you with two things your ability as a human being to perform well beyond what you think is possible and I'm going to show you how to do that in an hour and I'm at the end of it I'm going to engage you in something so it may sound weird it may sound funny hopefully you'll laugh uh one time I did it I actually cried doing it so I may do that here because I'm emotional all right so uh what I like to say is after 23 years of being a Navy SEAL I have found one thing that's predominant in all human performance and that is learn from living in and existing in environments that you cannot possibly dream of that people actually go there and do work work for a Navy SEAL I'd like to be able to talk about that but uh it's probably not relevant to something that you would even understand uh so first I was kind of want to orient you to the the packet that's on your table it's a trifold brochure about my business that we've established I just wanted to orient that you to that so that I can move away from it and start engaging you uh please contact me if if at the end when I engage you at the end that's how you contact me I may forget to do it at the end so I'll first start talking about uh the the hero thing that happened in Huffington Post so uh during the summer of 2009 I was called in as platoon Chief to lead 22 other Navy Seals into a back into Afghanistan because we'd actually been kicked out of Afghanistan after Red Wings which is Lone Survivor the movie Lone Survivor was an operation called Red Wings I don't know what it means it's just the name of the operation uh seals got did some damage to ourselves over there and we actually uh ended up getting in a fight with some other military units and we were removed from theater until 20 9 where we are asked to come back because the danger in Afghanistan had gone up 3,000 fold as a metric it was no longer safe for anybody in Afghanistan even the afghanis so we were called back in there to go in and quell the rebellions that were happening all over the uh uh the country and one of the interesting metrics for Success which if you're not in a business you're probably not in this room so every business has a metric that they're trying to figure out that measures how much success they have how many days you spend working on something and what's the profit probably that's a good metric seals don't work on the money profit I wish that we did but we don't we work on capture and kill that's our metric so the general in charge of Afghanistan and said hey we need in short I want you to capture and kill as many Taliban and capture as many drugs as possible in 6 months and his metric was over 200 people for us that is one of the greatest metric to give somebody that's we want you to sell five doors or whatever that you're trying to sell it's a metric that you can get your teeth into and that's what we train to do so after 6 months we were at 270 and I didn't get any of my guys killed which to me was a bigger metric so I was asked to go speak at Congress about what was effective about our deployment compared to other deployments because I didn't get anybody killed that's a big metric that's not what we are asked to do but that was what I thought was the predominant uh way to measure success and combat is not dying so so I had to give seven Le seven seven minute speeches to Congress I'm already over seven minutes right now probably I was unable to pass on any information to them which now I realize why all the decision in Washington are made they're made in s minutes 7 minutes is all you get our top Admiral had seven minutes I just filled the space that he was left with or was given but I won't get into politics because it won't lead us anywhere so what I was then asked to do is go around and talk about or flesh out what I thought was important to be able to pass on to people so this is the rest of the time here is I'm want to I'm going to challenge you that at the end of this period of time that I get to speak with you then the challenge is that you're better when you leave this room I guarantee I'm going to say something in the next 45 minutes that will give you an aha moment that will give you access to your own performance and I'm telling you nobody else can promise that and I'm promising you that here's what I have found to be true about all performance on this planet everywhere because humans are involved with this here's why whatever you say to yourself that's what you do and nobody's teaching that anywhere what we learned as seals and you your son hopefully will learn this or he won't so here's what we learn we put the body through the most miserable experience so that the person going through training has to encounter what we call internal dialogue the thing you actually say to yourself what you're actually saying that thing that you actually say is what we call internal dialogue it actually tells you to put your foot in front one foot in front of the other or it tells you to stop so that's the only thing that makes seals better than any other person that I know is because we're very intimate with what we tell ourselves so and so that's what I that's what the next period of time that we're going to talk about I'm going to start talking about what internal dialogue is internal dialogue actually drives Human Performance what most I'm only interested in performance how we get to Performance is where everybody either fails or succeeds what I know to be true is that for humans if you don't master your internal dialogue and I'm going to describe what internal dialogue is you don't achieve performance or you can't access your own performance so here's what we did as a seal Community we went out and bought all the best gear known to man called hopefully to make our make our performance better we got the best guns we got the best athletes we had the best physical therapy on the planet because we went out and hired these people that were at the top of their game so can you imagine so here's my analogy as a company if I was a company prior to making all these adjustments there was a a number of people that successfully graduated ated training there is a metc to that then we made all these adjustments it cost us $10 million what what happened at the end of that we made all these changes what do you think happened at the end of that we got better facilities we got the best pre-training known we hired Harvard and some other uh other organizations to come in and try to help us weed out our problems so that we would have a better metric and here's the metric that was before 85% of the people who start fail so we made all these adjustments what happened at the end of that period of Time same thing we spent $10 million to make an adjustment to Performance without understanding where performance came from so so what I started looking into when I was an instructor there in sealed training was what is actually going on with the human being that 15% of these people make it through and 85% don't and what happens with them and I let me tell you has nothing to do with what your body looks like has nothing to do with who your mom and dad were has nothing to do with what your athletic performance was before you started in the moment when Things Fall Apart so this is now translated to your business everything is great for a while the conversation the company is great and then something fails what happens in that moment that's what we're interested in and that's what I I'm taking for granted that that's what everybody is interested in everybody knows how to do things when they're working when they're not working what do you not have available to you that 15% of the people on the planet have available and I know there's people in the room that immediately know what I'm talking about and let me take a a step back as you're thinking about what that thing is that happens to 15% let me tell you another story uh about four years ago I met Jerry Barber who's off to my left here we're drinking a beer and on a shooting range up in Chicago which is where most great ideas come from uh we I'd been sharing with him that uh uh my wife had asked me to write a book and I think that's a novel idea but I had failed out of West Point in English not so novel an idea so Jerry and I convinced ourselves over a couple beers we're going to write a book together and the book just now came out and it took four years to do I say that because for somebody to overcome the failure of failing out of a school in English to sit down and write a book is the exact same thing that happens to 15% of the people that conversation in the face of failure is what internal dialogue getting access to that actually gives you as a human being and I think it's in the brochure as well that's my only pitch today is go buy the book and it will transform your life the book is written about this my wife had asked me to write down all the things I wanted to pass on to my children in case I died in combat and the writing of it was hard and the reading of it I guarantee you'll laugh and cry because I watched my wife read it and uh so uh if you want to have an interesting read about what it's like to actually exist as a Navy SEAL and live that life and what the family life's about and uh there are 13 lessons that I wanted to pass on to my kids that in case I wasn't there to pass on these are the lessons that will make make you an adult and they're pretty resounding lessons and one of them is love yes seals have love too your son ain't going to miss that okay so uh okay what I want to do now is I want to want to teach you something before I teach you something I just know as a teacher anytime you bring in something new to somebody it's foreign and it feels foreign so does going to school feel foreign because they're teaching you something that you're con you as a human being don't want to absorb so what I want to First do is an example I want you to cut you don't have to close your eyes I just suggest closing your eyes and folding your hands together like this however your hands go together it's no big deal I just want you to know that that's the comfortable comfortable place for you to fold your hands now if your eyes are closed open them and look at how your hands are folded either your right index finger or your left will be on top it's no big deal I just want you to know there's a comfortable place for you what you don't know that we're going to talk about is it took you 10,000 times to make that comfortable it literally did and who who does not have kids in here okay since you don't have kids you don't realize that kids don't even know how to pee they don't they don't know how to zip up their zipper or pull down their pants they don't know anything until you give them that distinction and it takes 10,000 times for them to get that 10,000 iterations of them saying to themselves this isn't me or this is me this isn't me or this is me that's how people will learn so back to this one it's very comfortable if I were to ask you this is how humans learn if I were to ask you to put the top finger two fingers down please do that do you notice that it's not necessarily comfortable it feels somewhat the same but notice said it's different now if I were to ask you to go like this very quickly notice that your fingers only want to go back to what is comfortable it would take 10,000 iterations to make this new one comfortable where that's where you put your hands all the time 10,000 okay so what happens in those moments when Things Fall Apart does anybody want to help me with that who's had failure in here other than Jerry I've heard about thousands of those uh Miss what what okay I said which question made you raise your hand the failure question okay where did you fail what happened that you failed you deliver on a project uh like what project okay since I don't know that from third base what is that what is it what failed the requirements were not okay so at some given time just for reference to this on Monday you had a project that had a Friday delivery date and on Friday it wasn't delivered okay so let me ask this question what did you say to yourself about that on Friday the things that I learned that I should have done okay okay what did you say about the uh the job on Monday when you first committed to it what did you say about it mhm what happened on Tuesday falling apart so in the face of it falling apart notice that there was language there you know what I mean that the World shows up to humans like this this is what most people don't grasp 15% of the people in the world understand this there's data data is not information it's data that's blue that's brown that's a glass that's data has no meaning until what happens how does data become information context until you give it context giving things context is another way of what's another way of saying that you give it value you you give it meaning humans give things meaning that don't all don't necessarily mean that you give things meaning that don't necessarily mean what you gave it it's a weird way of saying that I'm trying to reference something you being pretty you being handsome is something that I give it it's not that way until I give it that meaning things fail because you give it meaning and you stop most people don't live that if you knew as a young kid instead of 2 plus 2 is four being the most prominent thing that you learn as a kid that your internal dialogue drives your performance constantly constantly what you say to yourself about something drives it if you learn that as a young age what would be possible for you what would be possible if you knew what you said to yourself all the time drives what you are capable of doing success would be an alternative yes so is failure but you drive those things so consciously you're already right now deciding who I am does that make me who I am so you actually if you don't consciously know what you're saying out loud or internally and out loud makes that things show up a certain way then you're probably the 85% entrepreneurs are the 15% inherently something doesn't work do they say it's a failure no they're like a it didn't work something's missing okay let they never say I'm a failure and it ain't going to work they always come back with leading with language always they always lead with language because that's the human design language results you can't separate the two and results are never inherent by themselves they're always being led as long as you're in human by Language by what you say to yourself I got a sense of it in Afghanistan when we were doing comat operations in the mountains I ended up receiving a silver star for it and here's what happened we got overrun by Chetan Fighters and they are the trained cont they're like contracted by the world to help Islam fight Christians I hate to say it that's the rule so I was going to say something else but I'm not going to so we got overrun by chesan Fighters we were in the valley they were up in the mountains and they were also down the valley with us we let our guard down and how it occurred to me is I'm sitting with my back up against the wall and I look up on this Hilltop about 600 yard away and I see what looks like red bees flying at me and if you can imagine what that would be those are Trace arounds of being already fired and you know the movie Matrix when you like oh and all these bullets are flying over top of you that's how it occurred to me so as my back against the wall I saw these tracers being fired I rolled away from the wall and they hit all right where I was I jumped into this window and a rocket follows me into the window and blows me to the back of the room probably about 12T what occurred to me on the ground after being knocked down was the importance of internal dialogue in performance and it has affected me ever since what I said to myself at that moment was I am dead what happened to my body the moment I said that it can't do anything do you understand that your body can't do anything other than what you tell it to do everybody all the time has that possible for them so for a miserable period of time there and I can't tell you how long it was it could have been 10 minutes it could have been 30 seconds I couldn't move and all I could hear was I'm dead and then I remember my wife saying don't be afraid to die don't be afraid to don't fear death sorry it makes you weak and we need you to come back to us the language shifted and so did my body in business it's the same there's no difference I thought that there was a difference I thought that com combat operations were different than businesses I thought that combat operations were different than relationships that you have at home I thought that wealth and combat operations were different there's language and there's action when you learn language when you lead with language possibilities go like this in a half a second so what happened is I said I'm going to fight until I die not that I am dead so I immediately started getting in action rallied the troops and we survived 45 minutes of fighting we we shot up all of our ammo uh this and none of us died and we ended up killing 65 guys that were within 300 yards of us 12 against 65 tell me about what that language sounds like to you impossible so what is imp so I'm now playing with this concept called what's possible what's impossible when JFK said we're going to the moon was that possible most of us were probably alive then it was impossible and he declared we are going to put somebody on the moon that's the effect that language has and when you get the gra when you grasp how important language is what you say to yourself how you identify yourself is to your actions then it actually relieves all the strain it's not the other way around I know that people most people in this room are performing at about 10% capacity here's why I know that to be true I've seen people people I've seen seals go through training that thought that they were at 100% And then you take them to 200% and they're only operating at 10 you take them well past that you take them there with the access to language you don't take them there because they're capable you take them there because you kill off what doesn't work for them and that's Language by making them encounter how miserable things are and it's only miserable where in the language that you use so where can you so if that's what I've been doing for the past two years is talking to businesses about that and what I've seen is their performance goes from this weird curve like this to to this and they don't work there's only 24 hours in a day they merely get access to what's working what's not working in language they precede everything with language that's hard to imagine sitting in the room so I'm going to take you through a demonstration okay Jerry has seen this and it has evolved since the last time he's seen it who cannot catch a ball very well and wants to have a breakthrough and catching a ball come on up so what I want you so here's what I call this demonstration and I tell you the lineage of it it it was first called how to catch and I thought that lost its its flavor uh it's now called leadership because it's so relevant to every business that I've done it to or with if you will and here's the rules of leadership this is after hey love how doing you can catch how do you know oh my goodness okay uh so here's the rules of leadership after 23 years of Leading Men into combat and I boiled it down to this the rules are get the ball back to the other person and ask them what it's like for them and tell them what it's like for you that's the rule of leadership so the rule of this game Wendy is you can't catch you don't think you can catch okay so the rule is get the ball back to me and catch the ball and get it back to me okay so the first phase of leadership in your company in your life in your organization wherever is that the first phase of it is very close and intimate everybody know that that's why you have meetings you have meetings because there's what going on there there's language but it's easier everybody notice that it's easier to look at somebody and say well this is pretty easy how is your day today because you're staying close and intimate and you're not focused on all the things falling apart because you're there to help each other so why can't you catch know what do you mean you don't know you just can't when did you discover that you can't catch when I took a ball in the face so she took a ball in the face what what age was it 40 so did you catch before then no not really so what happened before then I when did you you avoided it when did you start avoiding it Young do you notice that there's a language to it that she is carrying with her throughout the ages and I would suggest that she doesn't recognize that there's a language to it she thinks that it's true she is convinced that she cannot prior to doing it that's how results die is when you're so clear that it's not possible because because is the worst word used in the English language and why is the other one so anyway there was a language there's something that happened that you've forgotten about that made you create a language behind that you can't catch okay so in in organizations or in relationships the first phase is intimacy an intimacy what doesn't work that's a question it's not rhetorical what doesn't work when you're intimate huh when you're intimate it's hard to be intimate and be negative yeah everything works when you're intimate what's not working here is anything not working here is it comfortable do you notice that you're actually passing the ball back and forth mhm and do I offend you or anything nope so is this easy for you yes okay so that's how you lead how are things going for you having led men in combat that's how you lead all that other stuff is just an adjective of what leadership could possibly be so phase two is when you create separation you've had your meeting in the morning and then they're in their workspaces it's not intimate I don't see the person anymore I'm separated by time space and distance and the rule is what you remember this rule get the ball and get it back to me okay okay so in the process of changing time space and distance what else changed what else changed confidence where would confidence exist did you say that it would exist in language so data changed and language changed did I recognize that there was a language shift I'm asking if you don't recognize that there's a language shift you shift your language so the what really changed here in your business time space and distance the rules are exactly the same catch the ball give it back to me what is it like for you is this more uncomfortable for you yes it is so in the use of language are you using language or is it using you it's using me it's using you it's the only thing you as a human being can control who thinks they can control anything else other than language if you can if you think there's something else you can control I will be your salesman I will stop doing this and I will work for you for the rest of my life if you think there's something else you as a human being have any control over other than language I don't think that there is I'm not being confrontational I've just never ever seen anything that I have any control over other than language okay I wish there was so this is phase two only thing that shifted was time space and distance and the language that I didn't know that I was having she said it was harder if she says it's harder what what gets harder it gets harder or she could say God I love it when it's this far out I don't have to language doesn't need pre-existing things to be created I don't have to already have I don't have to be good at something to say that I'm good at something or say that I like it that's why 85 % of the people that I've seen try things that are hard fail is because they don't access language they think gosh well I'm trying this out I'm trying to do something I'm not capable of doing because I think that I'm searching for my destiny if you're searching for your destiny who's going to tell you when you arrive there other than you do you notice that she's catching the [Music] ball is this a problem catching or throwing with me am I making it too hard for you is that a problem yeah so you as a you you as your business owner leader you threw her a curveball all you have to do is ask them how that was for them and be able to listen to that because what actually changed there I something time space and distance is the only reality that changed there and where the ball went so what changed this is the vagaries of language we don't even recognize that we use language to defeat ourselves so he threw me a curveball I hate him when he does that that's what my boss always does to me we don't recognize that there's language there so if this language is unrecognized and it's going on over here she doesn't perform cuz she believes that the her boss is out to get her she doesn't even know that it's her she could say I love my new boss just because I say so I love my partner and they uh sometimes aren't good because I say so when you have that kind of skill imagine what's possible so that was phase three so phase four can you scoot back to the wall so tell me what's different about this one I don't think you can this one [Music] so is it possible to catch every catch that's thrown at you yes it's not down there well why can't you catch it there because you have a predetermined notion about what the game is supposed to be that you're supposed to be playing in instead of G going back to the rule of the game get the ball and get it back and tell them what it's like for you to be involved that's really the game of life that when you're successful that's all you do all the time wow that was a curveball what was that like for you to have to spend 12 hours recovering from that you know what I'm saying when people engage you that at that level then you're you stay engaged and you tell them what it's like okay so is every ball catchable yes it is so what's not catchable come here okay stay there for a second everybody did anybody recognize what happened there you may can somebody share with me something relevant they got from that experience go ahead I was going to say she didn't follow the rules she didn't get the Vol back okay she also didn't use language in the face of it falling apart so what did you say about that ball do you know what you said about that it's so unconscious that humans do this to themselves they don't even know that they do it what did you say about that ball since it's not in my already existing sphere where I'm comfortable I'm not interested how many people in this room live that life that's why I say people live in 10% and it only is there because you don't lead with language impossible exists only in one spot where in your dialogue that you have about life it only exists there so if the rule of the game was get the ball and get it back to Tom and tell him what it's like let's start there lead with language so lead with the language of what it was like to catch that pass that pass yeah you didn't throw it to me yes I did you didn't throw it to my no you didn't lead with language you killed it with language this is what this is the hardest conversation for people to be in because they don't see it you still didn't throw it into my sphere no I'm playing a game with you called catch the ball so if you led with language it would sound like ask ask that question that's right on your tongue why didn't you throw it to me okay I did throw it to you can you play the rules what's the rule I have to catch the ball no get get the ball and get it back to me so how could you get this ball and get it back to me by not killing it off which is what you did so here's what happens with relationships businesses progress performance everything is there's no action there's still no action right now everybody noticed that there's no action where does no action live no I mean where I mean what's the address of no action it's in the language that she's having that she doesn't recognize that she's having if you knew internal dialogue drives performance and performance wasn't giving you what you were creating you would create a new language a new internal dialogue to give you access to performing you wouldn't go that's an impossible catch let me tell you something it's impossible to shoot somebody at 1200 yards when you're tired from your point of view from my point of view it exists only in the internal dialogue that I have about it and I've done that it only exists there it has to start there so if you had if you were to create a new language for this impossible ball what would it be I'm going catch it no matter what yeah yeah go ahead get it [Applause] yeah how many people don't do that in your own life she just doesn't take I don't know where it could be under there okay okay that's it thank you thank you so how is that relevant who did not see their own life in that who didn't who said that was the dumbest thing I've ever seen oh tell me if does that show up at your business where we have sometimes even the having meetings drive you crazy Where do they drive you crazy they drive you crazy because you don't create a new language for them and the action out of those meetings is probably no action do you know what I mean by that so what's possible for your organization anybody want to stand up like uh Phil did that earlier so now that you have access to language what's possible for your business anybody want to share that and then you can ask me questions any other questions that you want the woman who shared uh that you're you had been in Germany what's possible for your new life um that I continue my path in economic development but working with that are creating jobs and US resources to create jobs get people so what happens when it doesn't work that way you try to find another it will work do you mind me asking you a question I that's fine okay so what if I to come up and say you're a failure and this not going to work for you what would you say I'd say that um you're quite a negative person and that um there have been more difficult things that I had to overcome um than this so what if I said I'm going to do whatever it takes to make sure it doesn't work try harder okay notice that you have to keep leading with language you have to you have to you have to in the face of everything you have to lead with your internal dialogue and here's the formula for internal Di dialogue that it's not written down in your pamphlet so if you want to write this down feel free to internal dialogue is actually three words I am and then you fill in the blank that's the base of all Human Action you have to actually declare yourself in the face of something prior to it telling you what you are because after it tells you what you are then you're just agreeing with it you declare with no evidence then you immediately act on it how many people have used the word wish and want notice notice what happens when you use those words you usually don't do anything about them so a declaration means I have to then act on it immediately without evidence that it's going to work you have to go I'm I'm going to swim 100 or Run 100 miles on a broken leg that I currently have a broken leg you have to act that generates everything for human beings you will redesign your genetic code if you act on the things that you declare and then you have to assess the value of that here's why I say that it's not even something that you have to write down you're doing that right now you're saying who somebody is you're saying what you're capable of and you're acting on it or you're not acting on it and you're accessing the accessing the value so why not be in charge of that if you want to perform that's the only way to perform because that's how you're currently performing you're already a master of it except that you didn't know the first key to it was your own dialogue about it I know that people are capable of far more how do you get them to access that that's what I've been doing for two years oh that was my time limit probably okay so uh that's my ask I said I was going to ask something at the end of the conversation if something moved you today it could be anything it could be something that moved you in regarding a relationship that you've not acted on a physical thing that you've not acted on a matter of making uh abundance or wealth I ask that you act on it today and if you want help acting on it call me because I know that I can help that act I can teach that so so that being said you actually probably came here to hear hear from a Navy SEAL and you just got bombarded with something else so uh the room is open and available to questions I'm sure you have some yes ma'am what happens if your boss tells you I'm not gonna throw the ball back to you for eight weeks what's true about that what's true what's true about that if he says he's he's not going to give you the ball back then you can't go get it right not if it exists in language there I don't know all the stuff that you know to be true about that there's probably a volume of words and actions and probably 10 years of experience that you try to convey in two sentences who are you you about that that you can alter that conversation and make it important for him to play this game with you well what I am and who I am when I see the situation is I have another ball so I want to play that one I want him to I I want to offer that in the me then offer it offer it just notice that there's language there I don't know the solution I here's if you here's why what I think the difference between performance and non-performance is if you look for a solution first guess what the first thing you have to do is to overcome once you get this new solution do you understand what I said there the language the language of the old one so you never do that guess what every Diet Works every single Diet Works every single Diet Works why does it not work because your language about that is about ready to kill it off once you're like gosh I'm hungry this diet stupid had nothing to do with the diet you notice that I I cannot I would be stupid to sit up here and tell you how to do something lead with language create something in language or internal dialogue who you are about that person that gives them space to play in a different different game with you your boss let me tell you and then talking to a bunch of CEOs they miss the intimate engagement of phase one because they feel like they're always out there in phase two throwing you balls gosh why are this this idy not picking this up they lost intimacy the year years ago because they're responsible for everything they want it they just don't know how to get it anymore because they don't have access to language when you give a CEO access to language the business goes poof the next morning because when their language shifts yours does they call you up on the phone gosh I'm sorry about that I've let you down for the past eight weeks and then it shifts like that you ever notice that so that was a weird question thank you anybody else have another one if you have any seal questions people in the back sorry I didn't get to you it was kind of crowded you guys came here to hear hear from Navy SEAL so that may be more pertinent yeah I don't have a question I just have a statement with the situation it's like she was ping to the action and not the goal you repeated the goal and the objective but in paying attention to that action that part went past you do you notice that you do you people around you do that a lot they lose oversight to what's the context in which you're operating either in a relationship or a business like the CEO just doesn't look at the same things that the the worker is looking at it's a good leadership which is what you're probably all interested in is always bringing them back to the context in which the company exists I'm telling you what you probably would notice making money is the second thing that a company is interested in it's not the first when companies start doing making money they're pretty much on this 10% only for the rest of their their existence because they can't overcome it it's a weird anyway we could do that later sorry man someone else had a conver question yes I wanted to ask if um just about you how was your transition into the civilian life has it been difficult for you were you looking forward to it that's the funniest question so I was uh after 2009 do I have where's Phil do I have enough time okay so I led a platoon of seals in 2009 to Afghanistan when I came back I took over our sniper course and I led that course for two years and then my last job was I took over research and development uh which was a closest I could come to getting some kind of business Acumen on how the operator point of view is and the civilian Community what they look at technology and I chaired eight different boards on techn technological development and here's what I learned to do Champion the other person's cause I know what I want but it was limited to the small level of experiences that I had even though there was 2,000 hours of combat in that experience it was limited so I brought everybody together which I thought was a lot harder than Leading Men in combat was getting engineers and sales people and seals in the same room to speak English together it was very difficult uh so the transition we've been transitioning I would say seals are the best transition specialist in the world because you have to immediately move on from your last experience always that's over the next hardest thing is the next thing that you're doing so you're always transitioning it's very difficult on the family to live that way my wife likes to tell me I was gone 220 days a year for 23 years and I did get a divorce in there so I knocked that one out uh so transition's always available and always hard and it has to come from language it has to come from it doesn't matter that we're separated by 3,000 miles I love you and I'm going to reach out to you and I'm very connected with you and I have to create that in language even from combat I have to be reaching out in language to my family or I could say my family doesn't matter here's what happens with seals that say that we send them home because they lose any ability to interact with anybody because they shut down not a way to be very combat effective or even being a good person when you shut down so it's I'm busy yes let me I got a couple questions to kind of get us here towards the end for you what was the you know that 1200 yard shot your tired what is the right internal dialogue for you at that moment what are you saying it's counter to everything that the moment is telling you the it was 120° exhausting uh I'd about gotten run over by Hilo when it landed it land I fell off and it landed on top of me it was shearing me I thought I was going to get pushed off so all the conditions all the data is telling you this isn't the right place to be you're going to die you're never going to see your family again so what you have to do is put something powerful in that that is exactly the opposite I belong here I was meant to be here I'm effective I can do this it's possible 1,200 yd 10 mph wind I got 2 seconds to shoot the guy in hindsight I don't think it's possible in the moment it's very possible even when I look back at it mathematically I'm like how did I make that shot it was even the wrong hold so in the moment is where it greatness happens but it has to be proceeded with I am meant to be here this is who I am and these guys around me I love them and they're the greatest guys on the planet and sometimes you have to do the other side but to we're here to kill these guys that's our job and it has to be language there has to be language determined by you there so that may be confusing but I one more to wrap us out of this here was you told me a story and I want you to tell it here again in short if you can which was uh you told me the story about you and Jerry and talking about writing a book and you went did something I've never heard anybody else did you got some advice from somebody can you talk about how you did what you did there oh uh since it's going to be on YouTube I won't tell you who it is so I have the The Gift of Gab so I don't mind talking and I'm not embarrassed to talk in front of people even when I don't know what I'm talking about which is most of the time so uh I called up an author friend or I researched where an author friend that I like to read lives and I showed up at his door unannounced very renowned guy and I told him who I was and oddly enough for some reason people let Navy Seals in their house so we talked for about half an hour and what he said to me I asked him the question I said you know I'm trying to write a book and I failed out of West Point and you know what he said you know what writers do they write just write just keep writing and I'm like what an awesome language there's no right or wrong to that there's just right right right right and I've noticed that powerful people people who are great mentors never make what you do wrong ever noticed that they never do there's just act how was that for you okay try this act how was that for you act how was that for you so writers write and don't be afraid to call up somebody and show up at their door so all right y thank you Applause thank you [Music]
