>> MARILYN, WHAT'S THE HOLD UP? WE'RE ABOUT TO SHOOT THE BIG DANCE NUMBER. >> I'M JUST GOING TO MESS IT UP, DADDY. IT'S LIKE I'M A SLAVE TO THIS MARILYN MONROE. >> OH, DON'T SAY THAT, MARILYN. EVERYBODY LOVES YOU. AND TO CHEER YOU UP, I BROUGHT IN DEVIN AND AGNES FROM THE STUDIO TO READ YOU ALL OF YOUR ADORING FAN MAIL. COME ON IN, LADIES. >> WOW. OH, WOW, IS THAT A PAINTING OR A LADY? >> LOOK, YOU'RE MARILYN MONROE. YOU'RE EVEN PRETTIER THAN THE PICTURE. >> YOU SURE DO HAVE A LOT OF FANS, MISS MONROE. THIS IS THE MOST MAIL WE'VE EVER SEEN. >> WE HAD TO CARRY IT ALL UP AWAY FROM THE BASEMENT, BUT IT'S WORTH IT IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER. >> SEE MARILYN? THEY LOVE YOU. >> AND I DO NEED THE LOVE, DADDY. LET'S HEAR THOSE LETTERS. >> HERE'S -- HERE'S ONE. MARILYN, YOU ARE THE SWEETHEART OF THIS AND ANY OTHER MONTH. >> AW. >> AW. EVEN FEBRUARY? OH, SHUCKS, I'M BEGINNING TO FEEL BETTER ALREADY. >> HERE'S ANOTHER. MARILYN, I WISH I WAS YOU. >> AH. >> MY TURN. MARILYN, YOU ARE A WHORE, BLONDE AND FRAIL. NO ONE WILL EVER LOVE YOU, YOU DISGUSTING TRAMP. YOU ARE POISONING OUR CHILDREN, YOU TRAMP. >> THAT SEEMS A LITTLE MEAN. >> THAT ONE MUST HAVE BEEN MIXED UP. >> THIS IS ANOTHER ONE. MARILYN, YOU ARE A SWEETHEART AND YOUR SMILE IS A SWEETHEART, TOO. YOU ARE A SWEETHEART SWEETHEART, LOVE LOUISVILLE. >> I LOVE LOUISVILLE. I THINK THAT I AM READY SO START THAT SCENE. >> MARILYN, YOU ARE A DUMB BABOON AND YOUR BRAIN IS IN YOUR BUTT, AND I'D LIKE TO KICK IT. NOT A FAN. >> OKAY. >> WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? >> MAYBE WE COULD, LIKE, SCREEN THESE A LITTLE AND IF THEY GET REALLY MEAN, I DON'T KNOW, LIKE, BAIL? >> WELL, IT'S HARD, MS. MONROE, BECAUSE SOME OF THEM START NICE AND END MEAN. >> AND THEN SOME OF THEM START MEAN AND END NICE. >> AND THEN SOME OF THEM START MEAN AND JUST END. >> WELL, DO SOME OF THEM START NICE AND JUST STAY NICE? >> SURE. HERE'S ONE MISS MONROE. >> ARE YOU SURE IT'S ALL NICE? >> YEAH. >> YOU READ THE WHOLE THING? >> YEAH. >> FRONT TO BACK, SIDE TO SIDE? >> YEAH. >> ALL RIGHT. GO AHEAD. >> MARILYN, YOU ARE A WHORE. NOT A FAN. >> HERE'S AN IDEA. MAYBE IF IT SAYS "WHORE," WE SKIP THAT AND SAY "FLOWER" INSTEAD. >> OH, YOU GOT IT. MARILYN, YOU WERE BORN A FLOWER, AND YOU WILL DIE A FLOWER. >> YOU ARE A DIRTY FLOWER, AND YOUR MOTHER WAS A FLOWER, TOO. >> OH, OH, I FOUND A GOOD ONE. >> AH. >> I'M ALSO A FLOWER. NOT A FAN. >> OKAY. EVERYONE HATES MARILYN MONROE. I SHOULD HAVE STAYED NORMA JEAN. >> WELL, THIS IS ADDRESSED TO NORMA JEAN. >> NORMA JEAN?! ONLY IN THE WORLD, PROUDLY -- ONLY ONE PERSON IN THE WORLD CALLS ME THAT. >> NORMA JEAN, IT'S YOUR DAD. NOT A FAN. >> OKAY. >> IF HE'S NOT A FAN OF -- MAYBE HE'S BEEN -- >> WELL, MAYBE WE DON'T READ ANY THAT SAY "NOT A FAN AT ALL." IS THAT OKAY? ALSO, I'M SORRY, WHO ARE YOU TWO AGAIN? >> WELL, WE'RE YOUR FAN MAIL READERS. >> AND THAT'S, LIKE, THE WHOLE JOB? >> WELL, WE ARE ALSO VEERING FOR SOME OF THE GAY STARS, BUT WE CAN'T SAY WHICH, ROCK HUDSON. >> OKAY. I THINK I'M ABOUT TO BE DONE WITH THESE WOMEN, PLEASE. >> NO, NO, NO. PLEASE JUST GIVE US ONE MORE CHANCE. >> LOOK. HERE, IT IS A DRAWING. >> OKAY, WHAT IS THAT? >> IT'S YOU IN JAIL FOR BEING A WHORE. >> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE. LADIES, YOU'RE FIRED. LET ME SEE THOSE LETTERS. >> THIS IS ONE THAT SAYS HOW THE PUBLIC REALLY FEELS ABOUT YOU. >> OKAY. >> MARILYN, YOU ARE A GENIUS AND ICON AND DANCE YOUR HEART OUT. >> OH, DADDY, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED TO HEAR. MAYBE LETTERS REALLY ARE A GIRL'S BEST FRIEND. >> DID IT REALLY SAY THAT? >> WHO KNOWS, I CAN'T READ.
