Being Half Korean in Korea | ASIAN BOSS

hey everybody its Steven from Asian boss for most of its history Korea has been considered an ethnically homogenous country but thanks to factors such as the rising number of foreign workers coming to Korea South Korea's economy is changing and Seoul in particular has seen a rise in ethnically mixed children also known as Hafiz and this raises the questions about the lives of Hafiz particularly what hardships have their mixed ethnicities brought them today will be meeting with three Hafeez all with different foreign mixed-blood who live and work here in Seoul curious to hear what they have to say let's meet them and find out thanks for joining us everybody why don't you guys introduce yourselves to everybody so we can know who you are hello my name is Lee Amon or I'm Manish M I'm 29 years old and I'm half Egyptian half Korean I work as a professional translator and one of the big hospitals here in Korea hi everyone I'm ton SATA or you can call me Sarah Jane that's my english name so I'm half Korean half Filipino I'm 26 years old and I work here as an English teacher very cool awesome my name is Cedric stout I am 35 years old from the United States I'm half Korean and also half african-american and I work here as a filmmaker and also photographer my name is Steven 29 years old I'm gonna be the dirty thirty coming in the next month from America also half Korean half American and happy to be here I'm happy to meet you all brought you all here to discuss how is life being happy here in Korea how is your experience has been you know just throughout your life for wherever you come from so I guess in your definition what does happy mean to you happy means to me is like you have part culture of another country and part of another cultures country I'd like to think that we get to experience more it's in the name right it's happy so if I'm a Gyptian half Korean I kind of know about the Egyptian culture and Korean culture there are times when the other one is more prominent than than the other half so for example I'm half Filipino half Korean so let's say my face kind of looks like Korean but you know the culture I've got like I've mostly like experienced are from the Philippines so it's kind of like difficult to balance it out really you know when you are in the Korean like when you're in Korea I look at the term happy almost just as a label and I usually look at it from an ethnicity standpoint for example I'm half Korean ethnically and also half african-american or half black but it can also reflect on the culture as well but I also look at the cultural aspect as I'm not necessarily half culturally Korean half culture black either you know it's more of a mix and I would consider myself fully both and so were you all raised in Korea or were you raised in Egypt or I was raised in Egypt I was born in Saudi Arabia first yeah my dad was out on a business trip and then we went back to Egypt our home country I've lived for 20 years and after that I had the decision to move to a foreign country to study abroad for college and my parents were like since you're half Korean why not go to a country where you have family and where you can learn about your mother something like that so I chose Korea and I've been here for like nine to ten years for me it's just been like two and a half years here in Korea so I've I was born in the Philippines raised in the Philippines studying in the Philippines everything in the Philippines yeah so I moved here in Korea just you know get a fresh air try things learn the culture of my dad meet my family here in Korea yeah sounds like we all have pretty similar stories but I grew up in the United States and the first time I ever came to Korea was in 2012 as a full-blown adult but my mom who was Korean she had a very big part in raising me and my sister and so it's very much influenced a lot by Korean culture the Korean culture that she knew because she came to the States as an adult and so and that was decades ago so I grew up with that sort of Korean culture in those influences but I didn't move here until about two years ago and as you can imagine the Korea that I thought I knew or they called you that I thought I knew was a little different yeah a little different how do you guys's parents meet the first question get us how they meet yeah basically about me like my father was working as a doctor he's an orthopedic surgeon and he was in Egypt but back at the time from what I've heard I'm not sure of the facts but easier to us more medically advanced than Korea at that time so they were sending out nurses to Egypt hospitals to learn or study and my mom was one of those nurses that thought sent to Egypt and that's how they met back then Korea was still struggling as well and he thought that like Philippines is more economically independent than Korea back then so he learned how to speak English on his own talk to people a lot he was working for one of the biggest how do you say it factories here in Korea and he was chosen to go to the Philippines he was sent to the Philippines so they had a factory there they built roads in the Philippines so that time in factory he met my mom who is also an engineer so you know that kind of thing now it's factory romance my parents it's more so Club romance so my mom is gonna kill me if she watches but back in 1980 which was a year my mom actually moved to New Jersey she was pretty much in the States alone and she found a small Korean community so she had a Korean friend and they lived close by the air force base at the time and so her friend was like hey let's go out let's have some fun let's go to the military base to the officer's club and you know let's have let's just wait for some soldiers to come in sinus a and as they were waiting outside lo and behold my father shows up and they met eyes and the rest was history signed her in and from there that you started dating dating for four years so it's a really cute story yeah same with me my parents had a casino love romance oh yeah my dad was an engineer or he still is an engineer at a casino in Reno and my mom moved to Reno the small little town she had no idea like no any English whatsoever and she was a washing clothes at this casino you know washing bedsheets and stuff and they would always meet in the cafe in the cafeteria you know the workers cafeteria and my my dad said that his friend was eyeing this little asian girl and my dad was like yeah you know like go go up to her say what's up and the friend my dad's friend you know approached my mom and my mom like denied him and I think the next day my dad was all right I'm gonna give it a shot nice they went on a date and my dad said their first date he introduced my mom to my grandma which was well that was the first day like oh man what do i do what do we do for the first date and my uncle's like yeah I've just you know take her to the house and have her meet mom and then yeah you know lo and behold uh I think eight months later they just tied the knot and the rest is history so what's your guys relationship like with your parents do you have a better relationship with your mom or your dad actually I don't have good relationship with my dad since my mom and my dad got separated when I was about 12 or 13 and I'm not really sure since I was kid back then so yeah I don't actually remember but yeah so my mom and my dad used to get in a lot of fights and most of them actually happened because they were from different cultures right because you have their Arabic Muslim stereotype and you have the Korean Catholic or at non Muslim mother and they couldn't agree on a lot of stuff like and my dad's mom kept harassing her kept making her do stuff that she didn't believe she had to do or she didn't want to do back then it was really oppressing for her she was she like she suffered a lot back in Egypt so that didn't end well obviously after 12 years she was like I tried to stay with your father just for you guys but I couldn't do it anymore so so my dad got and my mom got separated back then and I lived with my mom actually for eight more years back in Egypt and then we moved together to Korea and my dad actually I kind of like contact him from time to time but recently I haven't contacted him at all or he kind of to be honest he doesn't reply back most of the time yeah so yeah I didn't have a good relationship with my father but me and my mother are on very close terms I'm having good terms with both of them but when it comes to like inside the house as I told you like the guys have to work all the time to provide for their family it's it's like it's the Korean thing you know it's all about like how you support your family so my dad isn't always at home he works itself out and that tended me to be closer to my mom but now that I'm all grown up I see that you know they're aging and stuff so that that made me feel like oh I gotta talk to my dad I gotta try to talk to my dad in Korean the only Korean I knew back then was like like dad give me money that was like the only Korean I knew back then going to school like a bundle but nowadays you know I'm trying to be close with my dad trying to say like I love you as much as I can so what's the relationship with your parents like cédric do you have like a better relationship my mom or dad well I'll have to start off by saying that unfortunately I lost my dad about 10 years ago to cancer but my parents were together all the way up until you know he passed and so I'll have to go back to that time but if I would have to pick a side that I was closer to would be my mom but just by a margin and it was mostly because my dad was always the worker he always worked and he worked very hard but he was always present in our lives as well but my mom was too stay-at-home mom that raised me and my sisters so I think just naturally I had just kind of a mama's boy you know a type of bond with my mom but then once I became an adult a young adult me and my dad we got a lot closer because he was able to just kind of share his experiences and we were able to talk about issues regarding race and culture and so I would remember out on the balcony just talking with my dad for two three hours you know while he's just back there having a cigarette and so those are the times that I really treasure because at that point I really got closer to my dad not just as oh he's my dad he's my provider but like oh he's an actual human being with his own story and experiences so at you know at the time when he got sick I think that's when I was the closest with him I guess I want to shift to hardships that your parents faced well you know immigrating to the States or just being with another mixed race do you guys did your parents ever share any of that with you guys definitely yes like I'm from a while ago I told you they got separated I was a bit young so basically there are there are culture and the Korean culture are kind of like on the opposite size like the first thing you can know about is language language is totally different mmm yeah it's really hard to know both Korean and Arabic so they had to speak English which both of them weren't actually good at it so you could you could imagine how hard it is to fight in a language you're not both good at it can cause a lot of confusion in the house so yeah language was the first barrier that they had to work on so my dad my dad actually started teaching my mom Arabic and we had forbidden no Korean rule in the house oh no Korean rule Halloween everyone speaks Arabic because your mother has to learn Arabic and cuz you're Arabic kids oh wow so yeah so that's actually one of the reasons that I couldn't say like onion haseo which is like greetings in Korea until I was 20 years old like I couldn't know how to spell it actually wrote it on a paper when I was coming to Korea in a plane so I couldn't so I wouldn't forget it like breathe my aunts and my grandmother here waiting for me yeah so that was really hard for them the language barrier I think was the most difficult thing they had to know what about you Cedric yeah they did faced a lot of hardship especially in the 80s when they started dating hmm my mother she was you know she's the first generation Korean and also you know her family at this point are in the States and also my grandmother played a big key role in this but back when they were dating my father he was a very good you know very good to my mom and around the time where my mom had to introduce him to the family they because he was black they didn't like him they just didn't like him you know if anyone knows my dad he was just really down-to-earth very cool person very respectful of any and everybody and so right around the time they got engaged the family they were of course opposed to it my mom's side and you know they set the wedding date and nobody wanted to come to the wedding and so no one actually came to the wedding on your mom's my mom so yeah so you know they did a small wedding and actually last minute my grandmother decided to come just because you know it's her daughter but she still didn't approve of the relationship so my mom would tell stories of how my grandmother would call him names because he was black and so so they faced that sort of hardship mostly from family you know and as my mom tells me societally they didn't really face too much and I think this because they were sort of in the military bubble so I think the military at the time we're a little bit more used to interracial couples but within the family is where the issues were but it started to get a lot better after they got married and then they had me and the story goes once I was born a wall just came down with my grandmother and she was able to see that I was part of her you know I came from her line so I think at that point she was able to learn to love my dad and it got to a point where from what I remember because I don't remember any of the bad stuff after I was born it was all good like my grandma actually lived with us for a big part of my childhood and my grandma loved my father and the big takeaway that I have from my childhood is my my dad always took care of my grandmother took care of my mom needless to say and really loved and respected her even even when she disrespected him in the 80s he always loved her always respected my mom and so I think that's what really just kind of got everything back on you know the right right terms so luckily it ended up well but it wasn't easy you know initially yeah and what do you guys think about like being a happy here in Korea being a half Korean in Korea is interesting because I feel like as half Koreans everyone has a unique experience and I like to tell people that at least from my perspective I think a lot of that experience or what they experience here has to do with in part how they look and also how fluent they are in Korean you know I would say my experience overall here has been positive I think I've come across challenges with trying to relate to people and maybe speaking Korean to them and they just for some reason they can't wrap their mind around the fact that I'm speaking to them this is foreign looking guy speaking Korean to me so I'm just gonna speak English to them so it becomes this battle it's so funny you know and part of me is like I totally understand but the other part is like it almost sets up a wall of separation for me you know when it comes to my identity it's like Oh it's a reminder that I am different or I'm not necessarily perceived as one of them you know so I think I do I wouldn't say I struggle with it but there are times where it's like man you know this is the reality I'll never be like so for me um some Koreans say that I look Korean some Koreans say that I don't so I don't really know maybe it's because of the makeup but when I first came here I don't know how to do like you know the Korean style makeup and stuff so most of them think that I'm more likely from silent who from Vietnam but never like a for half Korean half Filipino one time I think I try to like change how I how I do stuff watch videos of how they they do Korean makeup and that was the beginning I think when people don't notice me because I don't want them to notice me I want to fit in you know I want to fit in so when I tried doing it I noticed that no one you know tries to bother me on the street no one like chiselin they're like you know like do you want to answer this stuff and and on the subway like no one is like trying to look at you it's like you're no you're a normal person but you know deep inside oh my god thank you makeup I think um for for me to like fit in the crowd I try as much as possible to like learn my Korean because I want to be you know that's what I said invisible to to the crowd to everyone I yeah I don't want attention from them that's why yeah try to struggle with my career I kind of agree with Cedric like appearances here in Korea are very very important and why I mentioned appearances is if you look at me you would never guess I'm half Egyptian at all he's half asian and half something but you would never guess Egypt like if I gave you 100 guesses you'd probably not yet yeah so yeah in Egypt I actually used to suffer a lot more being the outside person or person or a foreigner or people looking at me like spitting out racial stuff like Chinese Chinese changing like like calling in cat stuff like that that's pretty common still now yeah and here when I came to Korea I actually was amazed like no one was looking at me like I was free that actually made my experience here as a halfie really good it made me feel really good like not standing out or not being weird person walking down the street and that's so interesting because my experience is kind of different I feel like in Seoul it's a little different because a lot of people are used to seeing a lot of foreigners in and around Seoul but I actually lived in Daejeon which is another city here in Korea with smaller City and I lived it for a year and that's where I would get a lot of stares and I know people don't mean bad by it but you know after a while when you go out you know you just said you don't want those eyes on you you know so I I don't think I can do too much to really blend in but I've kind of I'm owning it you know and I realize it is what it is and I just have to remind myself that it's usually out of curiosity that people do that for me I identify when I'm in the Korea identify as an American you know I wear that badge of honor but yeah when I'm in the States I kind of identify as Asian I remember you know in high school I was always being called like China boy and I'd always like tell them like hey man like my mom's from Korea but I come from like a really small town where people don't really know like countries and stuff so they just be like oh yeah Korea is the same thing as China China boring and yeah I kind of had like an identity crisis so cuz like yeah in the States I was like man I'm like what am I you know when I first moved to Korea yeah to be honest I felt like you know what I'm a Korean going back to my home country and then as soon as I got here I'm like I am NOT Korea so I had I had sort of a I guess you could say it was a culture shock because what I had envisioned Korea to be culturally as much as I was exposed to the media and I was into Korean entertainment I thought Korea's gonna be a certain way and as soon as I got here I realized that I'm Way more American than I thought so I think just to answer the question I would consider myself just both just a mixture of both for me it depends where I met like for example I'm in the Philippines I want to be like I am a Filipino like I am a Filipino and in the Philippines the culture the food I love the food the people I speak the language perfectly but then when people like look at me like you know I still get that stare and when I come here I still get that stare so I'm like oh my god what should I do alright so talking about stereotypes in Korea do you think that there's a certain hierarchy for like Hafeez because I know that Koreans have kind of a perception that Southeast Asians are a little bit lower I would say I don't know what has to do with like the economy or something but yeah do you guys feel like there's like a number-one kind of superior happy I'm half Korean I'm kind of like embarrassed to say I'm half Filipino I think it's because of first let's let's let's deal with the economy Korea is like you know high compared to the Philippines so most of the Koreans say that oh you're half Filipino so maybe you met your mom in the club or you know like you know how do you say strip club I had also an experience where there was this one guy so he was like talking to me why are you so good in English like because I look like Korean we're so good no English did you study in America and stuff I'm like oh no no I'm half Korean actually oh so your other half is American so like right in front of you they they judge you like oh you're half American you have like this so I'm like oh no I'm actually half Filipino and then Oh here from the Philippines so how much are women in there I'm like are you you know like I wanted to snap out like like why would you ask that to me I like right right in front of me I was like because I just don't wanna you know like point that to him l like you know women aren't there are not for sale or you maybe there are the you know red district I mean all the countries they have this like red lights it's not just evident you know even in Korea they have the red lights but it's it's not just evident but you know when you say that oh your field you know everyone just like oh your mom is like this your mom is like that but then I was just like oh no my mom is the Filipino she's actually an engineer and they met in November and I'm like so agitated by you know how the hell I get that kind of look when it comes to like when you say you're half Filipino I feel like there is a hierarchy when it comes to half Koreans or just let alone like different cultures and I don't want to make a blanket statement obviously because not all Koreans think the same way but I know in the past and even to some these days they look at those that are from African countries hmm so maybe half African as a little lower and even people today would you believe still think that people have brown skin or dark skin because they're dirty yeah still happens I feel like and this can be argued all day I feel like the half white and half crane would probably be accepted a little bit more embraced a little bit more I think it's getting better but still there is that hierarchy with those that are maybe black or from Africa and you and you guys here like you know in the news that you know Korean men go go down like Southeast Asia for these like sexy page and then they knock up these girls and then they you know these girls have these kids so that's kind of I think where the stereotype stems from where it's like oh you're half Filipino and half Korean like they roll their eyes and stuff I don't know where that comes from where it's like you know a person can just go to a country and kind of like just take a [ __ ] on it and then feel good about it and then just go back there they're there safe country like I don't know where that you know came from because when I go to Thailand I love it primarily because it's cheap so I mean I guess that's where yeah economy the economy a huge factor to play into it and that's why I think maybe Western countries are more like looked up upon I guess do you guys think that going back to the hierarchy things for being Happy's people that are like American Koreans receive more benefits in terms in like the workplace or like with there's more opportunities do you think that's like more prevalent for no well definitely definitely like going back to where we are seeing like if you're half American half Korean yeah they're gonna think that you have better education you can do your job better you're probably richer you're financially stable you have a better education you have a better background you have lived stabili so they're gonna pick a half American over a half Egyptian if they're both equally qualified any time of the day that's still a fact here in Korea even in the I think in the education system here in Korea I think they prefer more of the Western people typically like the the Americans like for me as I've told you my main job is working in a in a school so this was like my previous employer so I've told you like tell them that you're half Korean half American yeah don't tell them that you know basically like when they see the these like resumes and stuff they will get the American rather than the other half you know because like basically it's thick because if it's the language itself you know that they're teaching but I think in the other chops as well I think more of the Western people have the upper hand when it comes to grabbing these kinds of work and especially the the pay that they get they get like like we do the same job we teach the kids I did the same effort as you but this guy gets like way more higher free housing whatever but then for us like you know that the sub the lower in the hierarchy let's say gets like you know lower as well yeah benefits and stuff so I think no I think it's it's it's a fact I'll take it a step further and if you put a black American versus away all things equal and that's even sad to say even in job postings I have literally seen when you're looking at job postings just for example like if for a teacher English teacher some postings will say no black it really is but you know at least they're being honest right yeah so it's it's really sad so you can have a person who is more qualified and just because he's black or she's black doesn't get the you know position just because of that fact comparing my experiences in the Philippines and my teaching my job experiences and with this white guy who has like nothing but a visa yeah they will still get that that person instead of you who is a licensed teacher who is a qualified teacher you know just because of how maybe how they are how the economy is the education in in the states yeah so education where were you guys educated and like what was your guys's experienced being happiest I guess in your education system mmm so being half Korean back in Egypt actually I've gotten a lot of fights when I was young like I can remember being called my parents being called everyday like almost every single day back in elementary school I would have my uniform ripped off of me I'd be bleeding in one place it's all because it's not that I was starting fights but I couldn't like I couldn't keep up as people keeping calm calling me like Chinese yeah you look different you're weird and every time someone would provoke me I was childlike I didn't know what to do any time someone would call me Chinese I'd go we'd start a fight right so yeah that was hard but and then I came to Korean here in college and I look Korean here so no problems here but I remember when I was young it's really hard to look Asian in an Arabic country I think it's the same thing when I was back in like preschool grade 1 grade 2 to grade 4 so I had that experience because like you know how I look like my eyes are like smaller than them my skin is whiter than them so they always call me like they have a they call me like Bakula but that is a Filipino term for like a type of monster so so they call me that that one and then I don't have any friends at that time so I like I ran to the staircase I cried to myself and then when I started I transferred schools so I tried to be studious and I studied hard and I became like one of like you know the high high rank in the class so I can be the president in the classroom over sound like that so no one can you know bully me of how I look or how how I how I dress up so I think that was one of the hardest things but and when I grew older like college high school college I think most of them are now like my school or accepting like foreigners too so that that time I think these people are open-minded already I think I was overall pretty fortunate growing up in school considering that the city that I grew up in was military city and so we were used to having different ethnicities and different races though I did have my fair share of teasing to all the black kids I was always a Jan guy and then to the Asian people I was always a black guy so I was always like not whoever I was around right I was always the other side and there were times I remember being in elementary school that when I was playing football for recreation my coach I would actually call me black [ __ ] yeah this is like well over 20 years ago so things were a little different you can't really get away with that now right in middle school I started to realize I am different and I started gravitating a little bit more towards african-american culture and there isn't like one specific african-american culture but there are elements of black culture that I started to adapt because a lot of my friends were black and so I went through a couple of years where I didn't necessarily denounce my Korean side but I was just like you know what I'm just gonna I'm just gonna be black you know so I went through that and then in high school it was almost like I I didn't do a 180 but I was like you know what let me just let me just learn a little bit more about my Korean side mmm and so I think from there was really the beginning of me just developing more self awareness culturally and yeah I think in high school I had a pretty good experience you know not a lot of racial sizing yeah yeah yeah so I think um I got pretty lucky with that so what abort about you guys all speak Korean fluently I'm assuming I my Koreans like 30% but I work for a Korean company so my quadrille name which is like my manager he's like so pissed off at me I can understand it because I've been listening to it my whole life but when I speak it it's just like this like really elementary style speaking but I'm learning did you guys speak it formally well like I said I work as a professional translator right so I should be really good in my Korean but I actually think it's only like 90% there is always room to get better right yeah yeah well that's pretty good 90% I am these for me I've just been staying here for like um two and a half years almost three so I'm still there like you know getting better and I'm practicing my Korean with with my boyfriend also cuz he doesn't speak English so it's the only medium we can communicate with each other it's Korean and when it comes to work so I I work for an English you know school so in there I talked to the kids and in English of course but with the manager and the surgeon team sometimes I I try my best to speak in Korean and then if it gets to let's say complicated I just switch I shove my ma I just say it in English growing up my mom spoke to me in Korean I would say most the time and I always responded to her in English she never required me to actually communicate a dialogue fully in Korean so that's been the dynamics of our relationship you know even to this day I don't speak a lot of Korean to her but she speaks Korean to me and I just you know speak in very simplified English to her I would say my Korean level is about intermediate conversational not perfect grammars a little challenging at times depending on the complexity um and I also work at a Korean company right now and most of the communication is in Korean yeah so the goal is to get to a fluent level what is it like working in a Korean company where you're a foreigner but don't really speak Korean I mean you speak Korean well for me I work for like an Italian company that's based in Korea so we have an office full of Koreans I can tell you that I feel like as a foreigner they do not give me as much work as the Koreans that whenever I see Korean people at my work they're just like always so stressed and flustered where me I'm just like yeah I just wrote my report and I'm done for the day I just have to be here so you guys need any help let me know do you guys feel like um yeah you're treated differently in Korea versus Koreans I think the respect in the workplace can come also with how you look looking a little bit more Korean my experiences has been quite positive when it comes to the Korean language and just how it is in the workplace I think for me similar to you Steve I think I'm treated a little bit differently because I am a foreigner yeah and for me I don't feel that pressure personally you know so I don't know I feel like I do have a little bit of an easier time there just mentally but I will say that my company as well is not your standard Korean company in that it's a little bit more it's kind of a start-up feel like a Western startup company a little chill a little more autonomy and flexibility to do what you have to do without anyone breathing down your neck per se so I've been a little lucky with that at the company and I I do enjoy it my current job in in this school has been really good such a name is good everyone's treating me well the parents though sometimes I have this struggle when you have to talk to the parents because you have to either talk to them in Korean or in English so I tend to just talk to them in English about the report to them how their kids are doing but when it comes to the Harmony like the Grandma and Grandpa who doesn't really understand a little bit so that's where I do my Korean language and then they can see like oh okay she's not full Korean but she looks like Korean and these Grandma and Grandpa's they're just gonna say thank you too and nothing else but for my previews hang on that was the one where I guys told you that oh your your kids are asking you where you're from where you've been through when when you went to the vacation where have you been just say that you're from America just say that you went here you went there they're like controlling you it's like there's no freedom where where you can say that oh I'm like this and I'm like this I'm half of this and half of that okay so that that really was like a pressure to me as well because I don't want to lie to the kids I don't want to have that you know the feeling of like oh my god this is my pride it's my mom's country it's like I'm degrading it and stuff but you know I have to I have to like how do you say I have to control it because I need the job at that moment all right so as Korean males they all have a civic duty to serve their country since I was born in America Cedric you're born in America - we don't have to you know uphold that agreement we don't have to serve in the military for two years but Iman you went to the military what was that like yeah I actually volunteered to go through the military I know it's not but it was actually me and my mother actually thought this out because the first thing you gotta hear why though cuz Egypt has a military that you have to go to - like if I don't go in Korea I'm going to eat it right yeah Egypt is a bit shorter but I was thinking about my future so my Korean wasn't perfect like all Hafeez I don't think like anyone is born with two perfect languages so and I was like I told you since I was young I couldn't speak I couldn't speak Korean at all I didn't know anything of the Korean culture cause it was like forbidden in our house right so going to the military was one of the best and worst things that happened to me like like you shouldn't go to the military never ever also one of the best opportunities that I got to learn about how Korean people actually like hang out actually like talk actually like because you get to work together you get to do hard stuff together and no matter what race you are or what color you are or what language you speak if you do like military kind of training is together you get to bond with that person that's like foreigner or nationality and in the military I kind that kind of learned like taught me a lot about the Korean culture which transmission din me learning about how to walk in to work in Korean companies or how to talk to people here to get what you want you know making people feel I'm more Korean and especially here in Korea if you say that you went to the Korean military yeah it doesn't matter what you look like they'll be like you're Korean hmm yeah that's super cool yeah it's it's singing Korea and actually Korean meals too they don't like meals that didn't go to the Korean like there are meals here in Korea that I might get excused like if they heard if they're hurt somewhere or they're too thin or like missing a finger you don't go to the military but they have this pride in going to the military right so if you're like are you in the infant did you go to the infantry oh me too then we're best friends you know yeah bonding thing between Korean meals if you'd asked me would you do it again I'd probably say no I think it was a good experience overall personal struggle challenge that you faced here in Korea like was there ever a moment where you just like fell your knees and just shouted to the sky and was just like why have you guys ever had that moment in Korea and it was it because like you're happy I think my biggest struggle and challenge would probably have to be just me feeling like I'm an outsider I feel like there's always a constant reminder that I'm different yeah and then there's always the comments from people albeit they're they're friendly comments oh you are you sure you can eat spicy food or my favorite one is oh do you not eat chopsticks you know do you need a fork right right right those are the things where it's just it reminds you oh yeah so that is a struggle for me and if I can just also say my biggest insecurity is the language even though I'm at a conversational level I'm intermediate but I just kind of still struggle with in myself like oh I should have taking the time to really learn Korean in my younger years yeah and so I have to remind myself cédric it's okay yeah just take your time and then just do your best I think I'm okay with the fact that I'm half I love the fact that I'm half and I don't ever want to change that I just have to just I guess take these struggles and just accept it as the way it is but also just be confident and Who I am as a person as a human being that I am just as good as anyone else right I am just as Cranor I'm just as black I'm just as human as anyone else you know because actually out of all the struggles that we have it's like it's like I think it's the overthinking that that really gets us it's like sometimes it's okay like sometimes people don't actually you know be a racist to you and stuff but it's you who thinks that way because you know yourself that you're happy you are aware that you are a heavy that's why it's just like oh that girl is looking at me but you but straight right away oh I think she knows that I'm happy but you don't even know if she likes your hair or she likes your clothes it's just like you or me everyone else overthinking that oh I'm a half but I think more more of it more of it will come into your like how you you perceive your own self and how you accept yourself as a half-blood yeah yeah yeah I totally agree with you like it's if you're thinking if you think you're a foreigner you're always gonna feel like people are looking at you because you're a foreigner that one of the biggest struggles here in Korea was when I first came here it was really hard for me to make friends right so coming from a Muslim country I couldn't eat pork and I couldn't drink soju alcohol it's forbidden by the Islam right and what the Korean people like do you think that I can't do like so you have to open up yourself to get closer so that's what I did like I tried pork to be honest until now I don't like pork like if I was offered to beef chicken or fish I would prefer it over the pork but I do eat pork and I tried to drink alcohol I liked it pretty much at the beginning making the friends part was really hard for me it's still kind of hard you know until you find people you share interest with but it's getting better once you open yourself up I think I've think the the biggest struggle that I've had in Korea is just like making good friends where it's just like that's my like best friend you know and yeah being here for a year and a half I still haven't found like a best friend on the weekends I hang out with foreigners and you know I date Korean girls but I don't have like a cool Korean guy friend that I really would admire to have so if there are any Korean guys watching this what's one thing that you would want to change about Korea most of the people are trying to you know adapt because change is evident you know yeah you can see people on the street foreigners with Koreans making friends making be a couple so I think it's just more of the acceptance of the older people right like the older generation because I heard I've heard like some stories that even in our let's say our generation we let's say we get married to Korean and or to a foreigner but then there are still some struggles with the older generations saying no saying don't don't do this do that so that's just one thing I hope they can be you know more open-minded to these kinds of things like you know interracial people and mixed people but I think it's also within us you know how to solve that problem we we should like prove to them that we're not like different as you are and we could you know we could change or we are also respecting your culture and we accept whatever your culture is like it's just about respecting each other's culture yeah so it's it's up to our generation how to you know might change their minds or you know try to to accept who we are I think I would like to see more black representation in Korean culture and the representation that we see now I think is is okay but it's not necessarily representative of just black people across the world I mean there's so many different black cultures you know I grew up as an African American in America which is far different from growing up in the Caribbean as a black person or growing up in one of the countries in Africa and so I'd like to see more representation of black people in Korea but also I want to see less of the stereotypes you know that that Korean media has with black people you always see like the black person that's modeling for like an athletic brand or like a hip-hop brand yeah I just want there to be a little bit more of an understanding of the diversity of like people and also just more of an acceptance that black people can be viewed on the same level as any other foreigner as a white person right so I want this hierarchy to to really just just crumble I don't like it I don't like the hatred and even just the passive-aggressive passive-aggressive I guess stance on just race and culture and how how different races are treated differently you know even in media so I'd like to see just a greater representation of black people in general if I would change one thing in Korea I think it would be changing the fact that Koreans are obsessed with appearances being created some people take it to the next level right it's about their bodies about their facial parts of their body some people get obsessed with it it's causing people to get mental illnesses at the addicting to plastic surgery and a lot of other problems even it leads to suicide if that's the one thing I could change I wish they would like let their hair go out one time you know don't do your hair for they don't like have to like live freely a bit more yeah your appearance is everything in what's the matter is what's inside as much as that sounds cheesy all right future plans for Korea what do you want to do in Korea what's our future goals someday get a kid because since I'm married hopefully someday get a kid keep investing I actually started out a new YouTube channel it's about personal finance so I'm trying to get into some new instruments here in Korea learning about the country's economy for me I'm planning to stay here in Korea for as long as I can so I can like you know maybe build a stable job or like a family if I want to because I was born in the Philippines and right now if ever I would be having a kid I want that kid to be born in Korea and I want to raise that future kids or children with like in Korean culture but at the same time I'm gonna like be focused with the Filipino one you know so like it still will be invited to that kid I am working right now for a company but I've also been building a side business filmmaking I'd really love to tell stories and so one of the things that I'd love to do is tell the stories of the half Korean experience and just you know different people in Korea and what their experience is like as a foreigner and I want to do that through short films and eventually documentaries so I hope that one you know the people of Korea can really just see that and they could relate to the stories and that'll just be a step in moving Korea forward and just opening up their minds to different cultures and how to view have Koreans I think that would be something that would be really cool so if I could play a part in that I'd be very happy thank you guys all for your time coming down here sharing your stories happies yeah it feels really good thank you guys so much for your time hold hands right now we've got the coronavirus yeah so yeah thank you so much for your time and we'll see you guys next time I guess if there's a part two we hope that you found this discussion insightful we want to thank all the participants for being so honest and open how our mix children treated in your country please let us know in the comments below if you want to see more long-form discussions on pressing social issues like this be sure to subscribe to Asian boss and as always stay curious [Music] you

Channel: undefined

Views: 127,190

Rating: 4.9034629 out of 5

Keywords: hapa, koran, half korean, korean, mixed, mixed race, exotic, korean girl, korean oppa, korean man, asia, seoul, panel, roundtable, discussion, stories, story, insight, podcast, identity, relatable, halfie, globalization, modernization, stay curious

Id: oVZepLDDtFc

Length: 54min 20sec (3260 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 14 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/kimchiwursthapa]

Long video but a very interesting panel of half Koreans on Asian Boss. Especially as someone who is half Korean who has lived in both the US and Korea I really could relate a lot with the interviewees.