Become A Powerful Man - How To Unf*ck Your Life & Accomplish Anything In 2024 | Patrick Bet David

to truly be free you have to be strong enough to control your own life and many men today simply do not qualify many of you have been told the pursuit of power is disgusting you shouldn't do it many of you don't even have a clear definition of what it means to be a strong man and as today's guest Patrick B David says we have a hero making machine problem so today Patrick and I are going to dissect the current crisis of masculinity as well as what true power really is and how to have it in abundance let me ask are men today weak and if so what can we do about it if you look at data yes from 1960 till today our population has increased around 90% but in 1960 7 million people used to live by themselves today 38 million W 442 per increase right so what happens when we're alone you don't have competition kick and your ass challenging you pushing you having all that stuff taking place standards today are slightly uh lower uh you can look at strength with men with boys what they have going on uh then there's another data that's deeply concerning when you look at from 1940 the percentage of kids that were born to a single mother in 1940 was 4% 1940 4% that means 96% of kids that were born in 1940 were born in a household of a mom and a dad in today we went from 4% in 1940 to 40% today that's 10x a data we do not want to be bragging about by the way worldwide we're the worst when you look at data China India they keep it together we don't keep it together Middle Easterns they keep it together Muslims keep it together but in America we've gone a complete different way now some people will say this was FDR's bad policies because the whole welfare state some will say this was Lyndon Johnson but regardless who we choose to blame and put the responsibility on here's what we will look at a father offers two things that naturally comes to him when it comes on to boys so when we're talking choose your enemies wise day I'm talking to Tom Brady and I said Tom when I look at somebody that does something very big they have three things in common one they experienced unconditional love so somebody that no matter what you did you got arrested oh my God babe are you okay what happened in jail did they do anything to you like you can't do nothing wrong in this person's eye like you actually understand I cannot believe this human being loves me and I can go to jail you still love me freaking awesome right we need that the second thing we need is an unbelievable amount of pain from someone you loved meaning no matter what you and I do we can never make this person happy you can win Mr Olympia you can become a billionaire you can become a president you can become whatever you want to become this to this person's ey it's always going to be like yeah whatever but yeah whatever so you're never going to win this person and your entire life you're pursuing converting this person and baptizing them into finally celebrating your success right and the last thing was you choose your enemies wisely Brady choses enemies wisely Dana White choses enemies wisely you got a lot of these guys that you look at so where am I going with this you come back to the boys you're asking about young boys not having a father father gives one of three elements that you need as a as a kid growing up you have to be loved but you need somebody you fear and you need somebody you respect if a boy is raised most boys you get to an age I remember one time I'm 14 years old my mom is hitting me and I'm like what are you doing your hand hurts what are you doing it's the last time she hit me cuz it it hurt her her when she's hitting me I'm 14 years old it's doing nothing to me that was the last time I said you can hit me all you want it's not going to do anything to me so what happened in that moment I no longer feared her I no longer saw her from an authority place I just saw her from place that I love her not fear not respect like you're going to make me do something you can't make me do anything I'm coming home at 10:00 my parents were divorced I'm coming home whatever time I come home where were you not your business I'm home right that that kind of respect that a kid will have but a father if you have fear respect and love that boy has the highest likelihood of doing something big with his life our current incentive program in America our current tax system in America doesn't reward husband and wives having kids together that decreases the chances of a boy being raised by a father what does it do produces Reckless criminals produces kids that don't have order produces kids that think they can do whatever they want to do and essentially they become net negative to society so you ask me the question I would say yes but it's a multi-dimensional answer yeah so when I think about what it takes to form a strong man in a time where the thought of power itself is considered negative so this would be now 23 24 years ago I created a domain called seeking power and I remember telling people about in the beginning and there was just sort of an intuitive oh yeah I get it that's cool but somewhere over time that became like oh power like that's such a gross thing it's almost disgusting to want power I was caught so off guard by that because I had my head down I was building something and I was building things in a way that absolutely required aggression and power and when I look at people that want to do something big in their lives that aren't able to generate power they're not a able to tap into aggression I'm like you're not going to be able to do the things you want to do you're going to have a sense of internal weakness um a sense of frustration not knowing how to make the things come true in your life that you want to and then if you layer on top of that a victim mentality and somebody tells you no no no the problem is that somebody's holding you back or whatever you suddenly have a story for why you feel the way you feel but it's not the true story and so to me that creates this like death SP of for forget like I'm not doing it as like a keep off my lawn thing but I'm really mortified by what is being pushed as like this is what we should aspire to and reading your book was really interesting because your book isn't about how to make strong men but the tactics of getting successful at building a business and obviously it's more Nuance than just building a business but is an easy way to talk about it um you basically spend 300 Pages talking about how to cultivate capture and use aggression so walk me through what what is the trick that people are missing one do they need to uh understand power Revere power what is power you ever read the book power versus Force I'm I'm certain you've read the book okay power versus force a guy like you good luck putting it down it's it's it's written for a guy like you so the author David Schwarz talks about different levels we go to where we calibrate at the bottom whatever these eight levels are you're trying to force life and then the next levels you actually start gaining power you start becoming powerful right so at the bottom the lowest level of calibration he talks about is shame then it's guilt apathy fear anger Pride desire like I desire drugs alcohol stuff like that first level of Consciousness that you start gaining power and control of your life is courage you have the courage to be wrong you have the courage to fail you have the courage to talk to people you disagree with courage then it goes willingness then it goes acceptance then it goes neutrality like I can stay neutral like you have a very high score if you look at the book your score is going to be high because you have courage you're willing you're able to stay neutral and process both sides of the story acceptance then it goes to love joy peace Enlightenment and Enlightenment there's only been two or three they put at that level this is when you talk about Jesus people like that in regards to the aggression you're talking about or the the power why should somebody have you know fight for the power or how to go about getting the power it it it all comes back down to what level of a life you want to live okay I'm having a conversation with this guy and I said do you believe in God he says no I don't believe in God I said okay so what is God everybody has a god it doesn't matter who you are you got a God no I don't yeah you do no I don't I don't I don't have a god oh really no why are you building a YouTube channel with 4 million subscribers this the guy I'm talking to you know who he is he why are you building something like this what what are you trying to get what are you seeking maybe your God is data for some people God is sex for some people God is porn for some people got us drugs or attention or whatever it may be right power is a similar way as well you know years ago Phil donu is interviewing Milton fredman this we're talking 50 years ago this is in the 70s 7478 he's wearing a yellow if you put it I think it's like 43 minutes and Phil danu who at the time was a socialist you know he kind of came from that side he says so why do you think you know what do you think is the problem with all these greedy people in America and Milton fredman smiles and he says it's always the other fellow that's greedy right you're not greedy at all he's saying to him he said oh we're definitely not greedy here it's always the other person right everybody's greedy everybody's selfish everybody wants power everybody you know wants to get a certain level of attention everybody wants to win everybody wants affirmation to be affirmed and say you know what you're a leader you're a CEO you're a rockstar you're this we want that that is a form of us being almost proud of ourselves that our existence was worth it everyone's going through this journey how you go about it is trying to question everything you know I remember this whole concept of selfish now that guy selfish that guy is selfish and then you'd say I'm not selfish and you would fight it you know what you got lucky I didn't get lucky you don't know how hard I work to be this and then eventually I'm like I'll dance with you you got lucky I agree you're selfish yeah you don't have anything to say because everybody is selfish everybody wants to be lucky I don't mind being lucky but here's what happened in the book there's a section where we talk about the selfish selfless score right what percentage of you is selfish and what percentage of you are selfless so we had a a focus group that we did and we're asking a group we said the what is a person who's a 100% selfless 0% selfish look like and what is a person who is a 100% selfish 0% look like then who is actually more of a net positive to soci Society you know what conclusion we came with the person that's selfless probably smells doesn't take care of themselves they don't care about themselves they don't wear nice clothes they don't eat good food they don't take care of themselves everything's about other people it's in a state of Conformity and the other person that's selfish 100% probably doesn't make a good friend probably doesn't make a good spouse but they probably look good they probably smell good they probably make good money they probably eat good food they probably find a way to win do you want that person as your CEO no do you want that person as your husband or your wife no do you want that person as your president absolutely no but guess what individually just for the sake of selfishly not embarrassing themselves they're going to do things because it's all about them so then we broke it down and we said what level of calibration is good to be a SE over company okay do do you need a 3070 30% selfish 70% selfless well no that's bad why because we need you to have Big Dreams we need you to be pursuing something we need you to be after something if you're not pursuing something why are you coming to work early why are you spending the weekend thinking about ideas you're not going to be thinking about that somebody's driving by the freeway the average person's like oh nice thing right there you're going to be like babe can you pull over let me go in there oh I just got an idea think about it look at it from this angle what if we did this to the company and what if we brought this product let's walk inside and see what this building looks like cuz you're constantly thinking about getting getting closer to the vision that you have so we learn the profile of somebody that is at the right scoring to be a leader is 7030 70% selfish desires you're going after Vision who you want to be the life you want to build then 30% is selfless that person makes for a good father that person makes for a good husband that person makes for a good leader that person inspires others to go that person challenges others that person's not going to get too content too comfortable so as we're talking about aggression or hour or or any of that stuff you know somebody may be listening to this and they're going to say man you are not my cup of tea totally get it I'm not for everybody but the right person watching this they're going to be like that makes a lot of sense I've never seen selfishness explained that way before that makes a lot of sense I've never heard Milton Freedman explaining greed that way before that makes a lot of sense about power okay let me find a way for me to become a net positive to society and then you kind of go through that process but we got a lot of words that we have a hard time with because somebody told us it's a bad word you know be powerful have power be selfish you know greed no no no I don't ever want to have any of those and I don't want to be lucky when you break it down and you actually look at it people who ended up winning at the highest level they got lucky they seek power they had selfish desires they were greedy ended up having a life that they had and they were more of a positive to society than people who didn't have those four things they also inspire people there's to me I think what all this ultimately boils down to is nobody and I mean nobody wants to feel out of control and once you understand that to gain control of your life you must have at least Power by my definition so my quick way of defining power is close your eyes imagine a world better than this one open your eyes and go gain the skill set necessary to actually make that world come true and so it's really a battle to get better at something that matters to you and serves yourself for sure but also other people and if you live in that Pursuit you will very quickly realize that you are up against the world's tendency to move towards chaos now people hate it when I frame it in that this is just the second law of Thermodynamics the world moves towards chaos that just is true it's entropy but I guess because it has a weird word attached to it people don't really stop to think about it but if you're trying to be an entrepreneur I will tell you there are two enemies that you're going to face your own mind and entropy and entropy as represented by uh your wife Falls ill at the worst possible time when you have a major presentation um you have a competitor that's trying to take you out you get sued by somebody uh in a moment of fragility whatever like there is going to be a Litany of problems every day is like getting kicked in the face and in those moments the only way to persevere is with a level of ferocity like you have to be able to push through those storms to inject enough energy into the system that that you can bring order to an otherwise chaotic system and move it in the exact direction that you want it to go but to do that you really have to be able to get aggressive that's the the kindest word I will give to it you're very unabashed about talking about I'm using my own words but talking about aggression in your book what I call the dark energy um one do you agree that the reason that you the reason that I would want men anybody listening to this any man certainly out there anybody that's training you to um you should have a gear that is soft you should be able to be gentle I'm not trying to create um people that that only have one gear but one of your gears should be aggression Focus determination the ability to run through a wall to ensure that something gets done that will not happen by accident you absolutely going to have to make that a value turn that value into a set of skills courage being one of them and then pushing yourself forward in a very specific way towards a very specific aim do you agree with that need or am I miss I love the way you put it I love the way you put it so the keyw here we use is business planning for the audacious few right audacious few audacious few it's not for everybody it's the audacious few for example when you break down who you want to be on life okay I don't know if you're a sports guy or not you watch a sports team there's a guy that's just a support cast that's what he does that's the role he's going to play there's a guy that is coming off the bench and he does what he does then there's a guy that's the flag carrier to the best guy okay each team's got a flag carrier in a lot of places there was this player named Paul George he runs a podcast with uh one of my good friend Dudley Rutherford son Dallas they do a very good job together and they interview other uh uh basketball players and he said something so powerful in one of the podcasts he says look it took me years to realize I can't win a championship as a number one he says I've been the best player on a team I can win a championship as a number one I can win a championship as a two and a three but I can't win as a one guess what he realized he has to be a flag carrier he's not a one this week I had Ronda santis on the podcast Governor Ronda santis right did you watch the whole thing because it's a pretty uh uh fiery podcast that caused you have so much content now that uh well and ended up causing the number two trending hashtag for end up arguing cuz the part I saw you guys were very cordial we we didn't end up arguing but I asked him a couple tough questions about marketing his boots and all this other stuff and a video of him Trump anyways it was it was a bunch of different things we talked about but when I'm talking to uh the stist I asked him the following question I said I think there's two different types of presidents and he says what type I said one is Alphas y Lincoln is the alpha ulysis ESR is the flag carrier he became a two-term president not a great president but he was not an alpha okay he needed Lincoln to be the flag carrier too Ike Alpha Nixon he was a flag carrier johnf Kennedy Alpha LBJ took him out he became president allegedly you got Reagan Alpha okay senior is a flag carrier you got Obama Alpha Bill Clinton Alpha those two are alphas Trump Alpha George Bush the son flag carrier father lineage Prescott then you have Biden today he's a flag carrier he his way of becoming a president was Obama you're the greatest you're the best you're this you're that boom this is your opportunity for being loyal to me now I will come work for you you become the president right I asked Governor descent is do you think you're the alpha or a flag carrier okay now his answer could be whatever he thinks it is but the Market's going to determine whether he's an alpha or he's a flag carrier so what do you think he said Alpha well technically he said I'm a and by the way you may be an alpha in a room of 50 you may be an alpha in a company of a thousand you may be the alpha in a company of 100,000 you may be the alpha in a state of 30 million but you may not be the alpha in a country of 340 million Alphas have levels and it depends what level of an alpha you can be and that's very tough to swallow for everybody it's not for everybody and why is that here's why you said something very interesting you used a couple words and you said you know two reasons business all this stuff you know your wife gets sick and you're going to an appointment what do you do with that there is no manual that says hey when your wife gets cancer 19 steps on what to do next there is no such thing as that your your son just went through this here's eight steps one there is no manual for that in life and by the way the people who went through those situations like a I recommended this book recently I've read the book 2008 when it first came out uh by the coach of Indi Indianapolis CTS uh the book is called quiet strength Tony dunie okay I don't know if you know the story or not he's coaching the weekend of Super Bowl he's about to win his first Super Bowl ever okay his son dies at 23 years old oh Jesus his son dies at 23 24 years old there isn't a single person in the world that's expecting this guy to be there on Sunday to coach if he didn't what would you and I say we wouldn't judge him dude what are you talking about totally get it this guy chooses to show up to the game with a smile on his face he says cuz I believe he's in a better place he's with God right now I'm at peace they win the game I got the chills all over my body he writes this book quiet strength Incredible Book I remember I heard this guy speak gave a talk when he came out and go explain that to somebody and say hey you should go coach nobody has the per permission to tell anybody to go coach that's the individual's level of handling chaos pressure pain and everyone's different in that there's not a manual for that however where where I'm going with this on the alpha side is if you want to be the guy of the guys of other guys you can't go by the standard as everybody else does for example um World War II is taking place okay Chamberlain is doing what he's doing UK the most hated guy in that country is a journalist who talks [ __ ] about everybody okay who Chamberlain hates disgusted by him very arrogant very cocky pompous sometimes if Twitter was around when Churchill was around he'd be on Twitter all the time that kind of a guy he had an opinion about everybody and he was only 56 you know what Chamberlin has to do he has to beg Churchill to show up Churchill shows up the only man that was able to face the most feared man in the world was Churchill Churchill maybe the reason why we're doing this interview in English and not in German today think about the power of that however the chills this guy Churchill that we're talking about was hated but he was a wartime leader when War took place everybody had to call the person they hate the most cuz they they knew they were not cut for that job it's not for them so there's the levels of alpha there's a levels of success you want in life there's a reason why Jordan said you know if you don't want to play you know but I'm going to win in the last St and he starts crying you know you're like dude I can see this guy's fire that's why there's only one mic that's why we were all glued to the screen for five weeks on Sundays watching two episodes from 8 to 10:00 and we were all blown away by how this guy was a wired but who got pissed off afterwards Scotti Pippen and then Scotty writes a book and in the interview he's being asked Scotty how do you want to be remembered and he's got a smirk on his face he says I want to be remembered as the greatest of all time dude you're not a greatest of all time you're top 50 see he forgot he was a flag carrier and he wanted the respect of this guy to have the respect of this guy is not duplicatable that's a lot of effort so for somebody watching this again choose your enemies wisely but it's business planning for the audacious view not the timid majority it's not for everybody this is for the audacious view if you feel you're part of the audacious View this book's for you if not it's not for everybody you can reboot your life your health even your career anything you want all you need is discipline I can teach you the tactics that I learned while growing a billion- Dollar business that will allow you to see your goals through if you want better health stronger relationships a more successful career any of that is possible with the mindset and business programs in Impact Theory University join the thousands of students who have already accomplished amazing things tap now for a free trial and get get started today this is admittedly meant to be inflammatory but I care so much about the answer to this that I like the inflammatory nature of the following question what should a real man be like I believe there are a set of things that I am perfectly comfortable laying out saying this is what I think what should a real man be like what are the qualifications what should a real man be like um you know uh for me I had a man Monty he would say something he would say you know your house every 90 days you should you know they should feel the fire but not enough to burn a house down but every 90 days your kids should see what you're capable of okay where they're like ooh I just saw that sight of Dad okay and his reference was with your people your you're working with with your salese now today God forbid you say this on half po they're going to say you have mental issues okay you need to go to therapy you need to go hire Jack Nicholson to go through a real life of anger management and you're Adam Sandler and you know you have issues you have you have anger issues but there there needs to be a certain level of fear and respect where a man imposes but you don't have to use you know the reason why they call it a great equalizer the gun is because you knew I had it but that doesn't mean I use it what's the whole purpose of Jiu-Jitsu or martial arts is for the other person to know look bro you just don't want to fight that's all there is to it I have no desire to fight you but if we do fight it's going to be very bad there's this video on on uh uh Tik Tok and Instagram that went viral and his father is outside this guy's punking his daughter every time he walks by he says bro what's wrong with you what's the matter with you and the guy's swinging he says don't do this I don't want to do this to you he starts swinging he said I'm telling you I'm telling you again don't do this I'm going to hurt you the last time he does the dad picks him up drops him to the ground drops him grabs his hands doesn't punch him one time he said how many times did I tell you don't do this I know what I'm doing cops come take him and go away right the marketplace should know what you're capable of now to get to that point takes a while when you're a kid when I talk to my kids and we talk about the values and principles we have where we lead respect and proov love we don't get bullied and we don't bully that's our principles that we have um my son knows the market today for him is the school he goes to the school just needs to know what you're capable of one time marketing is going to do its part everyone's going to talk to each other you don't need to do it 50 times you don't need to do it 100 times you need to do it one time once they know the other people are like you know what not the biggest guy but I just don't want to mess with that guy cuz he's annoying he's going to keep fighting you leave that guy alone let me pick on this guy right and then that guy's job is to do the same thing so from that perspective um I think it's good to have a reputation the marketplace uh I think it's good to have a reputation within your family where your spouse feels protected by you when we got married at our wedding at the end of the wedding uh everybody's hammered everybody's drunk and I got up to give a speech I said I got a couple things I want to talk to you guys about there 500 people at the winning I said one uh I don't know how long we're going to be married we're going to take you one year out a time but if we take a one year at a time maybe we'll make it I can tell you guys all right now I think we can make it for one year every year we've taken a one year at a time we're at the 14th year we just crossed 14th year okay two I said if you come to my wife at any time without us telling you if my wife is pregnant you will never see us again it's none of your business you go through me and you don't ask her that question cuz you don't get to put that kind of pressure under my wife and say you guys are not getting pregnant are you sick are you is it him is his thing not working is your thing not working don't ask me that question because you'll never see us and I'm being I have some levity while I'm saying this where it's not like I'm being a drill sergeant talking to everybody but it's a way of manageing expectation where my wife feels safe to know you know what we're going to be okay I think if you ask that from the man's standpoint there's an element to it as a husband there's element to it as a father there's an element to it as a son to protect your father there's an element to it as a brother to make sure Nobody messes with your siblings then there's an element to it when you become a CO of a company to know that you're a formidable guide that people are not going to bully your company and if they do you're going to have their backs you're going to stand up in politics eventually you get to a point where if you become a president fortunately one of the biggest problems we' got in America right now is those three components that I talked about love fear respect love fear respect if a father has all those threes you're Trifecta if if you if you are loved and you know how to love if you know how to impose the right amount of fear and if you are respected you have to make sure that that makes for the best cocktail of parenting and leadership as a president as a president if the enemy fears you if the enemy respects you it doesn't matter if they love you but if they fear and respect you chaos are down we have a president today unfortunately that's not feared that's not respected and is not loved what happens worldwide chaos when you have leaders at the time at the top leading the way as the number one alpha and there's not fear respect and love catastrophic situation you're in and that happens in marriages companies parenting parenting as well as countries that to me is the important button so the reason that I think that this all matters the reason I think that men ought and I use the word ought on purpose I think you and I actually Define ought differently to me it it is the moral standard so when I say A man ought to do something I believe he has a moral obligation to do that so so men ought to be strong now my favorite definition uh which was really close to something you were saying um is Jordan Peterson's definition of the meek he said he was reading all this biblical scholarship obviously in the Bible it says the meek shall inherit the earth and he was like this doesn't make sense if you read Meek as weak he was like there's no way weak people will never inherit the earth and he just knows that the Dynamics of Power are such that the powerful are always going to rule there's quote I forget who said it but the powerful will do as they will the weak will suffer as they must and that is the natural Order of Things Society is designed to keep that from being the thing but certainly in a natural environment the lion is going to eat the gazelle because the Gail simply can't stop it from doing it uh so when you get in an environment and you remove some of the niceties of civilization such as you know when we're recording this there is multiple one outright War another one that's certainly threatening to become an outright war and you begin to realize very quickly that to your point a lot of the the posturing matters how people perceive the other people matters a lot it's a big part of the equation so Peterson's thing he's looking at this he's like the the meek are never going to inherit the earth people have to believe that you're strong and he said he found an ancient Greek reading of the word meek and it meant effectively uh somebody who is strong enough to use a sword but they keep it sheathed and that to me is brilliant you want to get so good at defending yourself intellectually physically emotionally whatever the moment calls for that you can stay calm navigate the situation well because you know the power is there if you need it there's a an idea with animals called nervous aggressive when people say that somebody has a loud bark but no bite that that's nervous aggressive they don't actually think they can win in the fight and so they try to throw up the smoke screen of making all this noise uh Jay-Z has a line something like uh they talk as loud as a motorbike but wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight um food fight probably uh anyway you get the idea so that makes a lot of sense to me that the real power is because it's not enough just to be strong it's not enough to be violent you really do have to be able to calculate it I saw the interview with Jared Kushner on Lex fredman and Kushner said um that Trump always liked to leave people with a 10% chance that he might nuke them which is horrible I say it with a smirk because I get the Showmanship of it but there is something to the unpredictability the know the belief that that person is dangerous and that it is merely strategy that keeps them in check there is something to that and at at that level to pretend that that isn't real is to set yourself up for disaster in fact I'd like to introduce my favorite Thomas Soul quote which my audience will have heard me say a gazillion times the last 50 years have been marked by exchanging what worked for what sounds good and that feels like a lot of the policies a lot of the ways that we talk about young men toxic masculinity all of that is it sounds nice it would be nice if we lived in a world where everybody could just be kind and gentle but we don't and so you wear thin the armor of civilization when you teach men to be weak you know how in families there's typically the one person everybody fears and respects when they die there's chaos and all of a sudden you know one person is taking advantage of this person or that person my my mother her her family had some money the moment her parents died uh one of her uh uh uh family members took over all the money and he abused everybody else he say you're not going to get it I have it now but when Mom and Dad were alive he couldn't do that the moment they died he bullied everybody from the money that he got that money was supposed to go to a few people he took it all and he gave crumbs to people and he became that dictator you're lucky I'm giving you this kind of money no no that was their money but because the parents didn't put anything on paper he stole it from everybody and he could do that what's the moral of the story when when that Alpha when that leader is not present bullies show up you know so so for us again like this is a very chaotic time I don't know when this is going to be released you know whether it's one war or the other war or this or that um we're we're one or two people away of being offended of World War II getting started you know you got 16 million to 18 million people died World War I you know 60 million on two third one if we go at this trajectory could be 200 million J the the job that we have collectively is to try to do whatever we can to turn down the temperature not increase it you know if if you and your wife get into an argument and you call me and you say you won't believe what she said my job isn't to say she said that Tom oh dude if she would have said that to me it's done are you kidding me doesn't she realize how amazing you are how lucky she is to have you instead is to say Tom come on bro she loves you and you know you love her she's partly right bro I'm G to take her side how could you say something like that you're not on my side you're on her side probably on this one am but I'm telling you privately I'd go back and try to make this work screw you Pat totally get it bro let me know if you want to talk later you get off the phone I have a job and it's called Doug diffuse unify and be the glue we don't have a lot of Dougs around the world today we have division today we have divisiveness today so but if there's that one strong personality leader of the Free World a Churchill a Reagan a person you don't want to mess with the world is typically a safe place yeah that is um it it is maybe a balanced place where the level of danger that is always ready to pop off is currently held at Bay um but I think the the reason that that Cycle Works where strong men make good times good times make weak men so on and so forth works is because when things are good the seed of its own instability is present because of that Loop and I don't know that there's any way to escape it it's one of the things that makes so predictable I agree now Church Hill is a fascinating character in fact this will be fun because I never get anybody that can talk about Church Hill I absolutely am just blown away by Churchill and you can say what you want and did he have his flaws of course he did but but this is a guy that felt he had let his country down in a uh military this is World War I uh he makes a mistake leading the Navy and he says okay I know exactly how to come back from this I'm going to even though he could have just gone back to England he says no put me on the front line and so he goes to the front line and he said other people didn't want to walk with him on the night patrols because he would just talk out loud and they're like bro we're going to get shot like what are you doing and he he uh said to his mother I have such a need to earn a reputation for physical courage that I'll basically do anything and so he stays in the front line multiple times narrow narrowly escapes getting killed sees countless people die around him and said to himself okay now after I forget how long but it was a long time again all voluntary uh he's like now I've earned my way back to Parliament and he goes goes back to England and re-engages in government life and I just thought whoa like I'm not even saying I could do it but I am saying I admire it and I'm saying that men ought to have that kind of courage and that to me we've had 70 years where we really on our own soil where we have not had to face um violence and danger I'm not taking anything away from the men and women that have served um overseas obviously but there's something that still let our country's psyche be lulled into the sense that we don't need men standing on the wall protecting us and that worries me military meaning we don't need a military yeah basically I mean so uh I was quoting the uh line from A Few Good Men where he's like men like me and the thing is I hope what we were supposed to take away from that is that he's a complicated character and yes some of the things he did were just despicable but he's also right and that's what keeps him from being a caricature is you you are asking people to risk being shot you're asking them to kill other people I mean it it is horrific horrific and there is there is an evolutionary seed inside certainly inside the male brain that makes that very possible you know if if there's anything like any man that wants to earn forget about you know should I go become rich should I go have a six-pack should I be in shape should I do this if you pursue anything if you earn moral Authority you you're going to have a lot of self-respect you'll have self-respect in a way you lead your wife and your kids you'll have self-respect in the companies you lead and you'll have self-respect in a community does this mean you're going to be a billionaire not necessarily does it mean you're going to be a millionaire not necessarily but if you earn the right and you have that moral Authority there's something to earning that that takes years that doesn't happen overnight when you're telling the story with Churchill there's something to it there's something to you know a guy setting the pace from the front there's something to earning the right you know there's something to this is why for me with the voting system that we have I think our voting system is totally screwed up in America couple areas of it I'm not a fan of it because for me I I would much rather have a 16-year-old kid who has a job working at McDonald's who made 20 grand last year and paid $3,000 in taxes I want him to vote over the 25y old bum living with his mom and dad not going to school not getting a degree not doing anything for him to vote I don't want this guy to vote I want to hear from this 16y old kid let this guy vote our system is too much of yeah here you go yeah here you go now earn the right to vote why don't you earn the right to vote well just by being a an American don't I earned the right to votee I totally get it but you got to have some you know pull your little red wagon how are you going to contribute to society well that you're discriminating against dude I'm from Iran I was born in Iran half Armenian half ayrian I'm a 1.8 GPA kid I'm a welfare kid I'm not a kid that came up here was going to be something but I wanted to come back and earn the right to say hey I want to earn this respect that America gave to me I want to go do my part I think we have to go more towards that in our house our kids you you know everybody's talking right now about having a phone I don't know how many articles I've read that the more you delay your kids getting a phone the more happier they're going to be by the way parents if you're watching this do yourself a favor and go watch the movie disconnect disconnect I I don't have a phone to see who's the actor but one of the guys is the I don't know if you've seen this movie or not disconnect is baitman what's his name is it Jason baitman is that his first name certainly is so the guy is that from Horrible Bosses okay so that guy this movie disconnect is a story about a boy who 12 13 14 year old kid goes to school there's a girl he likes these two bullies knows he likes the girl they create a Facebook profile with the girl's picture befriend everybody in high school thinking that's the girl but it's not she DMS him on Facebook in the movie this is 11 years ago 2012 and says hey please don't tell anybody but I really like you I'm shy I don't want to tell others but I like the way you're oh my god I've Loved You D and they're going back and forth she says I'll show you mine if I if you show me yours but it's the two boys so the boy send a picture of somebody else they got from a porn side he opens it so he sends it and then she says but I want to see your face in it as well so he does the next day he goes to school everybody's laughing at him because those two bullies took the picture spread it around the school then the boy runs away comes home is in his room listening to heavy metal music is trying to hang himself daughter sister walks in prevents it from happening and saves his life and then had to figure out how this happened because the parents weren't involved there's so many different things going right now in society that we we have to we have to be aware of people earning stuff phones are dangerous today that you know kids are picking up on what can happen to them if you do you have to educate them if you do you have to hold them account if you do you have to watch and see what's going on but in our family um everything starts with earning uh the currency in our house I've talked about this God knows how many times is reading you read you earn the right the more you read the more you can ask for if your grades are solid you get to ask for more if it's not you don't and people say Pat how could you have standards like that when you had a 1 Point GPA what does that have to do with anything I didn't have those standards I simply grew up in a house that nobody cared what my grades were there there was never an expectation of me doing anything my grade so guess what I'm going to rise up to the standards of whatever whatever it is as a 14 15 16y old there was no standards so I was left alone in our house there is standards there is expectations you got to perform to it you do you get more so America started off as earning we got away from that because earn is now another one of these curse words that people don't like to talk about how could you say something like that how could you say something like that all you care about is money all you care about is this no man I cared about you being proud of the contribution you're making to society because the more proud you are of the contribution you're making to society the safer the place is going to be the less you contribute to society the more bitter you're going to be feeling like everybody owes you something and then you could do something very bad to everybody else so yes I think we need to go back to earning like when you're telling the story of Churchill to have that moral Authority it's very interesting to me there's something super telling in the fact that people ask you well whoa whoa whoa how can you ask them to keep their grades up when you didn't keep your grades up cuz that reveals their value system now I have a feeling that they value system they've never taken the time to lay it out and I think one of the biggest problems when I think about okay what's ailing men how do we get them back on track it's what is your value system what do you how do you believe a man ought to be write it out then at least we have something that we can actually talk about when somebody says how can you do that you didn't have good grades what they're going for I assume is fairness the second your primary focus is on fairness now we have a problem so the reality is of course life isn't fair and I don't mean that in any sort of cheeky way it's just if you're trying to optimize for fairness you're setting people up to try to say uh the game is always going to be controlled go out there you're going to be fine and then they're going to get into a fight and I don't mean a literal fight but they're going to get into a fight for their business a fight for a promotion whatever and it isn't going to play out fairly and if in that moment they're emotionally devastated because they've been taught that everything revolves around fairness they're going to be in trouble if on the other hand we and this is very specifically what Tom bil you wants people optimizing for what is effective so you have to have a goal you have to know what your goal is what am I aiming at and then you're going to judge everything by whether or not it's effective did it actually get me towards my goal now I'm going to assume that your goal is Honorable if it's not then we already have a problem but assuming that your goal is Honorable now you can just is believing this doing this whatever is it going to move me towards my goal if yes I'm going to do it if not then I'm not do you know Jeffrey Canada oh Jesus I've got to meet somebody that can help me get this guy on the show I've been trying and trying and trying and I have no idea that he will agree with me on anything however he has created the most effective school for kids so he uh he will go into an underserved area and in the same building that the school is already being run at and they're delivering kids that are like three years Below in reading and graduating levels just absolutely atrocious he'll go into the same building with the same kids ran randomly select students so it's not even like a merit based anything randomly select students and then put them into a merit based school system and now it's like are you following our discipline rules are you doing your homework are you getting your grades like all of that and if you do you stay and if you don't you're out dude the outcome by being regimented by being disciplined by saying you are going to live up to these standards and of course I'm sure they do it in a way that gets the kids [ __ ] excited the kids aren't like oh man like I have to pay ention it's like hey if you learn this stuff you can control your life you can get out of this neighborhood you can go on to do whatever the hell you want and that kind of because again I I need to interview this guy to make sure my breakdown can Jeffrey Canada to make sure my understanding of what he's done is accurate but from what I can tell a big part of what he's doing is Sid stepping the um the unions and so if he's got a bad teacher bye like you have to be good you have to be performant and so they just churn out graduates at like an insane rate it it's startling and remember these are the same kids that before they got moved in were failing just abject failures they do it in the same building it's absolutely bananas and that to me says especially at that age structure discipline the right value set and helping people tap into um I I have no reason to believe he would use these words these are now my words and my interpretation of this that when you can show somebody how to generate ferocity in a controlled manner oo now you've got something now you've got something but most people can't find that gear growing a business is hard and if you're in the thick of it you know that as your business grows new challenges will be coming at you from every conceivable angle manual processes are multiplying and there is no one source for up-to-date data 36,000 that is the number of businesses which have upgraded to netsuite borle netsuite is the number one Cloud Financial system streamlining accounting financial management inventory HR and more so you get a customized solution for all your kpis in one efficient system with one source of Truth manage risk get reliable forecasts and improve your margins right now you can download Nets sues popular kpi checklist designed to give you consistently excellent performance absolutely free at netsuite.com Theory that's netsuite.com Theory to get your own kpi checklist netsuite.com SL Theory yeah that's pretty wild but at the same time I'm not surprised right I'm not surprised where a you know Bill Walton who's a hippie goes into a system that they have with UCLA and he comes in with his beard and his long hair and he says hey uh John Wooden says uh go get a haircut and then come back you got to shave your beard and you got to cut your hair or else you're not playing he said I'm not getting a haircut no problem you ain't playing he said what are you talking about listen kid I know you're the number one pick in the country today cuz you're the best center in America today you're not going to play for this team he says I got on my bike when I cut my beard when I cut my here came back and I think they ended up winning the champion National Championship one or two of them but when John Wooden died I was at the Ronald Reagan Library in UCLA I think it's one of those in in uh LA and uh uh one of my friends Dudley Rutherford is there and we're in the waiting room we're having a conversation I'm about to make a big decision in my life this has got to be I could even tell you the date it's got to be between June to September of 2009 when raiken died has to be around those when John Wooden died and the uh uh no it's yeah somewhere around that season anyways maybe couple years after that so I'm sitting there and I'm just watching former UCLA players 67 68 69 showing up coming down the elevator they're crying leaving coming on the elevator they're crying here's a man that impacted their lives if you ever read books on him his Pyramid of Success and things that he did fascinating this guy lived up to 99 years old because of how many people's lives he changed but what we don't want as a young man as a young boy that person that disciplining us eventually ends up being exactly what we want I'll give you one here depending on the levels of audacity from the kid I'm 18 years old I'm in the Army we're just talking about the sound of flight here and myself and three other kids we're from New York La we're all acting like we're tough guys we're not tough guys but we're acting like we're tough guys like that story you were talking about earlier you use a certain phrase that hey you know you know they're loud but it's not really they're not going to do anything we we're thinking we're gangsters we're tough guys all this stuff we're fighting each other in the laundry room hitting each other all this stuff we don't have a clue what we're doing with fighting we just have a lot of testosterone but we're not listening to this guy drw Sergeant Green one day he asks us to get into the hve he I'm going to take you guys to place get in there we get in there no problem we're driving to the back 40 30 minutes 40 minutes we never been here before he goes into a place it's not on a road cool pulls up gets out it's not saying anything to us picture a guy that moves slowly like Bruce Lee okay think about when he's not fighting he's just moving like that takes his jacket off his bdus takes his hats hat off takes his uh uh dog tag off and he says who wants to go first we're like what do you mean I so who wants to go first I said Dr what are you talking about he says if we fight here no one will ever know but we're going to fight who wants to go first he's 5'8 okay we're all big guys all right but we have no clue what this guy's background is but he's very confident so one by one by one we go in there casually one by one by one he beats the living [ __ ] out of us except he's got one rule doesn't hit us anything up here everything is here we're all on the ground begging him to stop he took it to levels where he knew we were going to be able to do pt the next day but not to the point where the Public's going to know what just took place and then we're done he says okay you sure you guys are tough guys no drill sergeant you guys going to be good moving forward yes drill sergeant you guys are gangsters no Dr Sergeant we're privates get in a hum let's go back we got on a hum we went back let me tell you I wish they would have recorded it there's a picture of me standing next to him um with me and my dad you could tell in that picture who ran the show you could tell who was the alpha he was the alpha you know what that 18-year-old kid needed that 18-year-old Patrick that's exactly what he needed I needed order he was the first guy I faced that I couldn't get away with everything I was doing he wasn't afraid of me he put me in my place boys need that God knows how many boys in know because let you say that doesn't happen in my life we're not having this conversation today let you say I'm just like a regular guy I don't get that discipline from somebody that challenges me and he doesn't care from parents got a divorce he doesn't care where I'm from he has no sympathy for me he's trying to lead me that's his job to make sure soldiers are solid so when War happens somebody like me is going to be able to stand up to the enemy but today that would never fly today he'd go to jail today he'd be written about all over the place today they would make a movie about him and I would get a call from Disney saying it's so unfortunate that he discriminated against you that you're Iranian Armenian Assyrian and you're Brown that's why he did that we should go sue the Army and we should make a movie about this and turn him to be a villain he was not a villain he was a leader he he he made the world a better place by checking me very quickly at 18 years old so as you're telling these stories and you're going through Jeffrey Canada maybe his approach is a different approach maybe he's not going to use the approach that J sergeant green used with us but at the same time we need more people like I don't know who he is I don't know his standards but based on who you're telling me a guy like that we need more men like that in America yeah I'm with you so how do we get going back in the right direction in fact talk to me about the military so um what's your confidence level in our current military you know there's certain things that I talk to my boys about that I don't want my wife around and she doesn't want to be around I said babe this is between me and them you can't be here right now I got to talk to these guys and I will talk to them okay and she respects it and we do our thing um we got a couple rules in the house I don't give the girls powpow they don't get poww what are you say poww poww that's what we call in our house it's called pow pow they don't get spanking they don't get anything the boys it's a different story they don't get it anymore but they know what can come um and when I need to talk to these boys to put them in their place I have to have the conversation privately what's the point if you've never been in the military if you've never been to war you you have no understanding of what it takes to prepare somebody to defend you have no idea what it takes to get somebody to defend you've never done that before so what does it mean in war when the other guy is trying to kill you there is no hey man do you have your mask on cuz Co it could spread hey before we fight did you take the vaccine cuz I can't fight you if you didn't take the vaccine hey before we fight what's your di score in Russia what's what's the ESG score you guys have you guys you guys good or cuz we can't inappropriate hey what kind of weapons you guys use are these going to make the climate dirty the bomb how are you not worried about the climate how dare you have a weapon like this so before you shoot us let's check to see if that weapon you're using is climate friendly did that doesn't exist when a war takes place when a war takes place the other guy has one thing in mind either surrender or I'm killing you that's what happens in war so how do you psychologically prepare somebody for that well maybe we should just prevent people from going to war totally agree I'm not for it I'm glad we didn't have it for few years just all of a sudden when we don't have fear respect and admiration for leader in America we have more Wars okay everybody thought the last three years were going to be friendly and peaceful and we were all going to get along forget about us getting along in America the world can't get along the last three years right so how do we get back to it we get back to it by the following manner you got 50 employees here give or take uh based on what I what people told me and you build a good business and you're doing very well okay how many times Tom matter of fact let me ask a question a different way how many people including Quest including all the businesses you've ran how many people have you hired personally actual employees that you personally have hired I've interviewed 1500 people okay more now because that's when I clocked that stat it was like five years ago but so yeah I've interviewed 1500 I've had 3,000 employees I was involved in hiring probably 30% of them directly fantastic you you were the COO or whatever role you CM or Co I think one of those roles last you told president okay so president has one of the hardest jobs cuz you're the COO and your your Ops your data your all of that stuff okay how many HR managers have you interviewed oh Jesus um interviewed probably 25 okay so watch this how many have you hired or have you had uh four okay so did you ever have an experience when you interviewed a your first HR manager where the next one this one didn't work it prompted you to ask two additional questions on this one that you didn't ask on this one and on the third one you ask better questions than the second one and on the fourth one you ask better questions than the third one right okay so first HR manager I'm hiring it's like we just need somebody to do the payroll you know total you know all this stuff and you know check GNA Insperity ADP who do we use and $39,000 and do this and okay great man I'm so glad we got somebody handling all this payroll and then hey we got a complaint here 401K benefits health insurance cost going up is this good I don't know and don't car right next one we need a better one we need a better one we need a better one and co co happens we had a HR manager that was reactive to everything and it's the end of the world and it was causing everything in the office to be chaotic I said this is not going to work out so I'm interviewing people and here's how I'm interviewing people I say hey uh Mary just out of curiosity let's just say in our licensing department we have 20 employees there one of the employees comes to you and says I got a cough and I'm not feeling well you tell this person to do what go get tested great they get tested they come back it's positive what do you do what are your next three moves oh send everybody home okay I can't hire you second person comes in and that just that answer alone I already know you're not fit for this job next thing I go comes in licensing department has 20 employees one of the employees comes to you they're coughing they're not feeling well you send them and they get tested positive what do you do what do I do yeah here's what I do I send an email to everybody in the company I tell them such and such as Co if you like to leave you can take a laptop and go home and work okay great better answer but still little bit too much third person comes in for the interview hey licensing department has 20 employees one person comes to you they're coughing they get tested positive what do you do um I ask who in that department has been with them if they have I tell them they can go get tested and then if that person's gone in the kitchen I'd say who else was around you when they were you know in the kitchen or the bathroom such and such have you shook anybody S I shook I'll go to that person and tell them that and ask them if they want to get tested they can and then if they bring back negative come back to work if not totally get it okay reasonable we're hiring this person so I started hiring people based on case studies where am I going with this your question is how do we go strong like we used to because it's chaotic today here's a point next time you're picking a president think about your hiring somebody for a job and ask better questions one of the questions we need to hire today when we wanting to pick our president or our governor is how they handle chaos based on what experience not based on what they've said based on what experience what have they gotten done what's their biggest accomplishment how have they helped the economy what do you want as a president do you want somebody that needs other people's money when they go run for office because the more people's money you take and the more they give guess what comes with that nobody gives $10 million and says what yo you know what you don't owe me any favors but here's 10 million don't worry about doing favors for me and your super pack I'll give you $100 million but I don't want any favors from you that doesn't work that way they'll give $100 million and there's three favors in the back and hey you got to change his three laws to prevent this guy from competing with me any president that ever ran that needed the least money the people of power hated I'll give you a list of these guys John F Kennedy his father funded 50 40 or 50% of the entire thing and then people showed up a big number and by the way he said I'm willing to spend 100% of it when he became president who hated Kennedy's it's a long list of people are you kidding me the oil people you got CIA you got Federal Reserve you want me to keep going you know the story you're a smart guys there a lot of people that don't like that guy why cuz he didn't take money from anybody that they needed they knew he could do it on his own Reagan his own financing okay you go Trump his own financing you go Hillary Clinton 100% other people's money Biden nearly 100% of other people's money that's a bit scary okay Kennedy was a Democrat you know Trump is a republican it's not like you're talking left or right but maybe if like when when uh you you probably know the story with Steve Jobs when he started Apple when he started Pixar right he put $7 million of his own money into the company okay we're having a meeting yesterday with with Dana White at two-hour meeting nice meeting and we're having a couple other the conversations about what could possibly happen business dealings all this other stuff guy comes to you he says Tom we want to raise $10 million for this project we're working on you're going to ask we're going to ask probably the same questions 80% will be the same question 20% is going to be different but what do you want to know so far who's the management team what's their past what's their background what's different about this what's their blue ocean do they already have a technology is there an MVP what kind of results do you have how many transactions have you like our app man we've done nearly 10,000 transactions 100,000 uh times this app's been downloaded we have Revenue in the seven figure Mark so we have a number to look at it now I come ask you for $10 million and you say okay what are you going to do with the $10 million I tell you or that $10 million I'm going to take five off the table for myself and then we're going to take the other five and I'm going to give myself a $500,000 your salary and we're going to pay this person this and then the last 2 million that's left we're going to put into technology are you giv that $10 million no now watch this what if I come to you and I say uh Tom here's a product this is our proof this is what we done this is our leadership team here's our salary we're paying ourselves right now the $10 million we raise from you and your Camp I'm taking 0 salary I don't want any salary nothing and I don't want to take a penny off the table we're going to take that money to put into technology you're probably more open to the idea of entertaining this and if I finish up with the following thing and I tell you by the way Tom I have put $6.8 million of my own money into Manet you're not going to say 6.8 doesn't even want to take 6.8 right now of the money he put into business he's willing to do it later on he wants to put 100% in and he doesn't want to salary and he doesn't want to change a salary in the company you're probably going to sit there and say what's the risk for me there isn't let's talk about it let's get lawyers involved let's look at the deck let's get deeper etc etc if a president comes in and they're running and they say I'm putting XYZ amount on my own money that kind of gets my attention because you're risking your own Capital as well we we have to we have to start asking um what do you have involved that you could lose if this thing doesn't work out you know as an investor we have to look at hiring our president and our governors in that way we've not been trained that way we've been trained to just he's been 30 years in public service is that a good thing or a bad thing well you know 30 years in public service we ought to give him respect as a cop cool 30 years I get it respect 30 years in the military salute to you sir 30 years as a firefighter that's a tough job you've been 30 years as Congress what have you done for the economy who's your funders who's giving you money we have to ask better questions now most people don't want that conversation to be taking place but I think our interview process of whoever we pick that come with the policies that's leading to the catastrophes we're experiencing we have to be a little bit more selective of the presidents and the governors we choose okay so that circles back around to me so I'm not a society guy I don't think at the level of society I think at the level of the individual and if you fix the individual then if you fix enough individuals and suddenly you get a society that's high functioning so to me there's ultimately no difference between um talking about what does an individual person need to do and then how do you ask better questions because right now if you tell people to ask better questions they still aren't going to ask those questions even if you give them the questions to ask they will not understand how to interpret the answer to me you have to build up what I call frame of reference so we all view the world from a certain frame of reference and when you believe the world ought to be fair when you believe that Equity is the name of the game not a quality of opportunity Equity that everybody gets the same on the other side um then those people are going to act a certain way and they will feel right and they will feel Justified because from their frame of reference it all makes sense if money is evil and everything has to be viewed through the lens of power uh then all of a sudden their actions make sense if you have a different world view let's say it's about Freedom capitalism self-determination then you're going to be viewing life through that lens um my question is is there a right lens that you are like hey this is the thing that we ought to put forth and this is what people ought to pursue and I think the downstream effects of that will be that we elect better officials so on and so forth let me let me ask this question so let's let's have a little bit of a banter here exchange I like this a um what what causes a company to attract tens meaning if you've read Steven schwartzman's books book in it he talks about how at one point 30 billion Auto guy at one point he realized it's all about hiring tens not nines not eights but hiring tens but most people can't afford tens when you read Reed Hastings no rules rules they realize A10 is the equivalent of 28s okay one 10 is the same as 28s sounds about right sounds about right okay so what causes a company to attract tens you want me to give you the breakdown I want to hear from you okay so number one is going to be uh a mission that is bigger than whatever Mission they have in their own life that they are very excited about next one is going to be um that you're building something that is novel and is actually going to allow them to bring the full weight of their talent and intelligence to bear um so not retreading old stuff this is really something new got it um the world actually wants the product uh they are compensated well they have a sense of ownership autonomy um and they're surrounded by other tens okay so compensated well did you say autonomy autonomy okay and then last one was you're surrounded on other tens yes okay I'm not going to ask you how many tens you have here because I don't want to cause a fight but uh uh we won't go there surrounded by it isn't all tens even team knows that so so so when you look at this compelling Mission novel you know full uh uh you know uh where we're going what we're doing World actually wants to Pro uh product compensated well autonomy surrounded by tents to me um what is black don't do to get tens is the mission that insane I don't know um what is Netflix do to get tens what what does Yahoo do to lose tens to Facebook what does Facebook do to lose tens to Google what what does um what what what are tens attracted to to me everything here you could have an incredible Mission check you could have novel man this is we're doing a really big thing historic check World actually wants the product check if the incentive program sucks you're not attracting those people period let me make go a little bit deeper for you you live in the great state of California you know California how many people they lost between California and New York the last last year 1.4 million 1.4 million you saw the stat do you know what state in America's 50th place for the most people lost last year California do you know what state's number one uh Florida's number one receiving net positive net positive population growth Florida is number one Texas Texas number two then you got Carolinas this just came out by the way very interesting number for you to look at CU at the bottom is California New York Illinois okay the econom is bigger in California the economy is bigger in New York the econom is bigger in a lot of different places why are they leaving because the incentive sucks so if a state with better incentives is in place like Florida which means what you keep your state taxes if in Texas you keep your state taxes Tennessee keep your state taxes we'll figure it out in California why are gas prices in some places seven bucks why are gas prices in certain places five bucks six bucks you got this gas tax on top of this gas tax on top how come the other states don't have the gas tax these are the incentive programs why did one of of the biggest liberals in America that try to save the world you really want to talk about climate change no one probably did more good for climate change like Tred to do good for climate change and a guy named Elon Musk who voted for Obama who voted for all these guys who voted for Hillary and this guy moves to Austin Texas why would he do that why did the guy who try to legalize marijuana for the longest time who said I'm voting for Bernie Sanders what what is he doing moving to Texas guy named Joe Rogan why did 40,000 employees leave Toyota go to Texas because of the incentive program so where am I going with this I you and I are in the same place where everything starts off with you and I like what do I control what can I do about it right and as you get to a different level I'm sure you've paid a lot of taxes if I were to ask you about how much taxes you paid you paid a lot of taxes for the money you've made you guys build a billion Auto Company when you have a billion auto company and you've taken money off the table multiple times you know and you're doing it in this state you could have your capital gains 23.8 but you got to add that 13.3 on top of it so on your state you sell you get $200 million in the state of California you're going to pay roughly $80 million in taxes but you do that in Florida or Texas you're going to pay 60 million $50 million in taxes that $30 million stays in your pocket guess what that's pretty attractive incentive wise what else when you look at it you look at other people that want to live as well the average person that's making 60 Grand year in California dude you have to live 80 miles away in Palmdale to be able to make it and Palmdale's even getting expensive today courts you got only a couple Pockets you can live to be able to survive with the kind of pay that this uh Marketplace is paying you so when I'm going back to the question and you said well what percentage of people are really going to be thinking about that question this is the problem that we have we think we have to win everybody over we don't we think we have to convert a 50% of the population you don't it's the 12% in the middle that run America that's who runs America you got 47% that's going to vote Democrat no matter what you got 44% that's going to vote Republican no matter what then you have that middle whatever that number is going to be that you're dealing with you know maybe it's going to be 42 44 then you got the Libertarians degree and all this other stuff The Independents and Libertarians rule America so if those guys who have the ability to have courage to have a change of thought and are neutral neutrality and are willing to accept alternative Solutions and they're able to reason well guess what they watch a podcast like this and say [ __ ] this makes a lot of sense we have to change incentive so what do we do either one you say that I have no desire to get into politics so how can I help okay no problem go back somebody up that you can feel that they can do it and start recruiting people to run you know behind closed doors I'm recruiting people to run like I'm talking to people and saying you got a lot of values that people would love I think you ought to consider it really yes you ought to consider it I never thought about that I think you should think about that why don't you read these three books see if it does anything to you why don't you go look at what the bushes and the kennedies had as a legacy their legacy was simple in their family you make money first you take care of your wife you take care of your uh kids they have enough money to not have to worry about anything they're set for school and all that stuff you set yourself up a little bit of retirement if you want to make a little bit more money go for it but last but not least you got to give back to the country that give you this incredible life how do you do it nonprofit okay you either go into politics or church but somehow some way you got to contribute so I I want more like I used to not care about politics at all until I realize America's problem is is the incentive program the reason why we went from 4% of kids being born to single mothers in 1940 to 40% today is because of the incentive program the reason why we have so many divorces in the world we are leading the world in divorces in ways that doesn't even make any sense we're at we're at 23 8 some numbers you look at where China and India are at 3 or 4% our incentive program sucks when you look at small business owners when you look at people going out there fighting for let's print more money every time these guys print more money guys like you get richer every time they print money you and I make more money because your money's in assets and your money's in equities and that money is going to go to these equities so the valuation of these companies flips like right now everybody's worried about a market crash you know what's bigger than a market crash today you know what scares me more than a market crash today a reverse market crash you know it's a reverse market crash it's what happened in Venezuela this year imagine stock market goes from 10,000 to 64,000 what like right now we have interest rates at four at 8% eight and a quarter some places but let's just say 8% and and real estate prices are going up it's the least amount of refi we've done in 27 years refi application is at the lowest for 27 years and the amount of inventory of homes for sale right now is the lowest we've had in 20 years but real estate prices are going up how so imagine if Powell today takes this 8% and he brings it down to 7 to six to five to four what happens market Dow goes to 60,000 40,000 50,000 why it's not because the economy is doing good because we have that money in the market it's going somewhere so what happens all of these people that were talking about well look at the rich getting rich and the poor getting poor your policies are printing more money is causing the rich to get to richer and the poor to get poor because the disparity is getting wider if the rich are making 12% on their money and the poor are making zero because they have in checking accounts what do you think is going to happen every year that distance going to get bigger and so what do we have this year in 2023 most strikes we've ever had you ever seen any this many strikes in our lifetime we're three years apart you and I I've never seen this many strikes UAW strike finally agreed 42 bucks an hour you got UPS strike you got Walgreens CVS you got Kaiser 75,000 you got there's so many strikes going on today what are people saying dude I can't make it I can't make the money and in your state California uh they rais the minimum wage for fast food restaurants to whatever the number is 22 bucks and you know what Chipotle and McDonald's just announced they're raising prices why because they have to how are they going to make that money you can raise minimum wage all you want the restaurant is going to raise the prices they're going to have to raise the prices so now all these automakers that are sitting around saying oh you want us to pay these guys 42 bucks an hour no problem guess what the consumer is going to have to pay $1,500 more for the car they buy is the consumer okay with that cuz that's how math Works math works that way so to me at this phase of my life if a person's 20 years old watching this don't worry about what we talked about last 20 minutes just go make your money if a person's 30 years old watching this and they got a wife and kid and their careers like here they're about about to kind of go focus on your career pay a little bit attention to this but if you're 40 plus 45 plus and you're seeing what's really going on in the economy and you're like what the hell are all these policies I love my state of Illinois but what the hell are we doing here I love New York but what the hell is going on New York I love San Francisco but it's no longer San Francisco then you have to pay very close attention to the different incentive programs in other states and ask why can't we do that in California why are we not doing that in New York why are we not doing Illinois people in California are not asking those questions so uh I love this compelling Mission novelty you know novel World actually wants to product compensation autonomy surrounded by tens but at the basic most simplest thing is our incentive program at the top of our US Government today and by many states absolutely sucks it's interesting so um let's have a collision of Visions here so I think think that every word you said is true it is necessary but not sufficient to understand what's really happening so it show me the incentives and I'll show you the outcome so says uh Mr Munger and he is correct when a system becomes deranged so when you're talking about an incentive program which I know you leading sales teams have experienced the madness that ensues when you get something a little bit wrong in your incentive structure and it incentivizes terrible Behavior I've seen that up close uh being in web 3 I've seen that up close where suddenly people are treating something that should be fun like a video treating something that should be fun like it's a um roulette wheel or a gambling machine and so for sure people are going to find like whatever little minuscule thing that they um Can exploit but to me the key is to avoid deranging the system as much as humanly possible and the way that you avoid deranging the system as much as humanly possible is to give people values right now my big problem is that people are not being inculcated with values and I can't believe I'm saying this because I am like the least conservative guy on the planet however I am so obsessed with what [ __ ] works like what what is the outcome that you want if the outcome that you want is the America that you see or wherever in the world you are okay great then whatever you're doing is working for me this seems like uh as close to a humanitarian crisis as you're going to get in the west I mean when I was a kid I really believed I could do anything I set my mind to and because I believe that I went and did it but if you don't like I dude so I've worked in the inner cities a lot and the first time I heard a kid say uh I was like why aren't you even trying like bro you're so smart why aren't you trying like why why are you here working for minimum wage this is crazy I'll teach you anything you want to know about how to grow and climb up in the world and he goes oh uh my mom told me that the world doesn't want people that look like me to succeed and I was like so [ __ ] what that's the worst advice ever assume it's true assume it's true assume everyone is against you now what you're just going to take it you're just going to take the first minimum wage job on a line that you can get you're not going to like push yourself you're not going to again develop personal power get so good at something we both love Kobe you got to meet him and I did not but he's got my favorite quote booze don't block dunks you can get so good at something that people can't stop you even if they hate you even if they're paid millions of dollars to be better than you to stop you from doing a thing this guy still scored 81 points by himself in a single game okay in a game where often 80 plus points is all that's scored pure insanity and so if this is why like I don't have kids so the odds of me suffering from what I can see coming are very low it is but a love for Humanity that makes me want to scream the whole idea of impact theory is I really believe the ideas that you believe about the world matters so much they will control the quality of your life and so now I'm just trying to make sure that people get high quality ideas about self-ownership about what you're capable of about everybody should be trying to build as much personal strength as humanly possible so that they can do the things that they want to do in many different areas so getting people to understand all 10 fingers of responsibility should be pointed back at you that if we want people to build a society that is better they must believe in a Grand Vision there must be a mission to their life to the lives of others that mission must have some tie to measurable results results so that we don't just do what feels good or sounds good we do what actually works and so to me there there is a massive restructuring of the way that we think about raising kids about the way certainly my contribution is once you come to work for me cool I'm not going to raise you I'm not going to raise my own children it's not the way that I'm playing but godamn it when you come inside of impact Theory we are going to run this in a way that's going to be effective it's going to make you a better version of yourself that's going to make you a better version of however you're contributing to the company and that [ __ ] is a non-negotiable so everybody has to sign a culture document that says and I quote you must be a hardcore [ __ ] like period end of story and if PS that turns you off great this is not the place for you but I know what it takes to actually fight against the chaos of the world and you're going to have to choose your enemy wisely in fact this is something we haven't talked about yet yet part of what I'm trying to get them to now I think you have to balance the beauty of what you're trying to do I'm trying to make sure nobody gets to the age of 15 without encountering a growth mindset at scale through entertainment and ideas cool but then you also need to be able to tap into the dark energy and that to me is about an ability to capture the energy output of the fire in your belly for lack of a more literal expression so tell me why when picking an enemy it needs to be somebody that really makes me feel some kind of way because uh choosing an enemy how do you judge an enemy there's 14 different types of enemy we talk about in the book but the way you judge an enemy is the lifespan of how long that enemy can drive you you may have an enemy that drives you for a day you may have an enemy that drives you for 30 seconds somebody cut you off you got an enemy for about 30 seconds okay you may have an enemy that drives you for a month somebody you're going up against for sales contest I'm going to beat that guy okay cool short lifespan not a big deal then you find an enemy that drives you for 5 10 years 20 years now you got something good unfortunately Tom most people choose The Wrong Enemy uh when they're when they're competing I going to read something to is this the book or is this a different book uh I think is this the book let me see if this is the book I'm I'm going to open this up and see if this is the book or not let's see here all right hang on one second if it is I want to read this to you oh [ __ ] they sent you to heart look at that look at you buddy respect I don't even have this literally I'm tell I don't even have this funny thing is I didn't get it either I got a PDF so when I saw it here I was like all right who send this to you do you know who s I don't know the team really so penguin send it okay well I don't have this I don't have this cup that's Sam sent it e e sent it so you got it directly from penguin just so you know this is the first time I'm seeing copy of this let me read this to you okay two quotes one A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends balazar gra graian let me read the other one for you which fires me up okay you have no enemies you say my friend the boast is poor he who has mingled in the fry of Duty that the brave endure must have made foes if you have none small is the work that you have done you've hit no traitor on the hip you've dashed no cuff from the P perjured lip you've never turned a wrong to right you've been a coward in the fight Charles Mackey okay all right so you read this coward I'm not a coward I'm I'm not I'm not I'm not going to be categorized as that totally get it but if you're if you're going to be doing something big you're automatically going to have some enemies now we're looking at Elon Musk earlier and we're talking about him and you look at Elon who's been driving for this long everybody asks isn't this guy worth $300 billion yeah what are you doing buying Twitter when you're worth $300 billion you're already running SpaceX you're already running Tesla you got these trucks that all of us are waiting for okay you got to figure what happens with that rock you threw out the glass that the glass broke we got to fix that right and at the same time how many kids you have nine or 10 kids and you're doing podcasts you're always on podcast you're interviewing with people how the hell do you have time to sleep why would you buy Twitter and now you're the most second most hated guy in America you didn't become a friendly person when you bought Twitter you got worse why would you want to do something like that psychologically you have to have issues so then you ask the question okay say this guy in three years is the first trillionaire say it happens in a year what do you think he's doing the next day after he becomes a a trillionaire you think he's taking three months off and going to Monaco no not him why because while the world thinks this guy's doing it for money he's not doing it for the money he's on a mission okay fair but why at that level because he's got something that drives him that none of us know about could it be his father very high likely that could be his father could it be something else we don't know about of course could it be what these you know astronauts said about him and made fun of him that we think space experiments should be done by the government and not by free enterprise and free market maybe and it got him tears if you've never seen that 60-minute interview I'm sure you have right it could be but it's him now Michael Jordan same thing Tom Brady talking to him same thing anybody you admire that's able to tolerate the kind of pain required to win at the highest level they have an enemy that drives them they're just not telling you about it most people will never disclose who the true enemy is it's private Bill Clinton in this one book uh it's called The hypomanic Edge and you know First Rate Madness I don't know if you've read these books or not uh it talks about bipolar hypomanic you know ADHD why all these people that end up doing something big they typically are a little bit off how does this guy how is HE capable of going 18 hours straight and he's still doing it and yeah but what's wrong with this guy how can he do that there's that element that they just can't help themselves right yeah Bill Clinton you know they asked him about his mom and his mom his mom drove him a lot most people don't know about this and in one of the interviews he said there's no benefit from me saying anything bad about my mom literally there's no benefit for a man to say anything bad about their moms you're not going to win you're never going to be able to commiss the marketplace you had a bad mom as a man you can do it as a woman you cannot do it as a man the Market's going to be like how dare you say something now men can talk trash about their dads the market will receive it they'll make a movie about it right but you can't do it about your mom that was clintons who drove him you know people have it people now at the same time you know 14 types of enemies in the book that I talk about you know there's also the concept of choosing the wrong enemy that could steal decades from your life decades away from your life hypothetically I'm doing an event at the Vault conference okay this is two years ago and on the first night we go through a personal audit questionnaire that you got to go through and the next morning you got to come back and talk about it with the group and we're looking to see who's going to have a breakthrough based on the questions that you have to answer okay no these are 83 questions that I went through back in 2003 at the Matador Beach here by Zuma I'm sitting there going through myself crying like a little baby with my not yellow notepad that I'm answering these questions I had to break through boom I added these into this list that people are going through and they get to experience it for themselves who do you get along with who do you not get along with is there a pattern of people that piss you off the most why is that who do they remind you of these types of things that kind of for you to see what you're going through so the next day 2,000 people in attendance everybody's given theirs husband and wife this the Breakthrough we have another one the Breakthrough we had one girl over here not getting up her her sister's like elbowing on her my sister wants to say something I think she really had a big b breakthrough babe what are you doing babe you got to tell him babe tell them okay she gets up she said Pat this is very hard I so what is it so let me tell you who I am I've done very well as a person who runs her own business I make more money than All My Exes I make more money than the guys of my life I make more money than any of my teachers I do very very well with the salon I run I make very good money my people make very good money I have a nice house I drive a nice car I have money in the bank I have all the Chanel purses everything I said okay so what's the point but I'm alone I'm not married I don't have any kids I don't have a family I don't have somebody to look forward to coming home to and talking to celebrating any of this I so what's where you going with this she says for the longest time men have been the enemy and I realized they're not I'm wasting my time having men as an enemy if you've ever seen a movie Jerry Maguire where all the divorced women are sitting around the table and they're bitching about men and their husbands and all this stuff and then Jerry walks in and she's like I don't care I love him you guys can send here bitching about all your ex is all you want I love this guy I love this guy I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life I want somebody in my life they in that group had identified their exes and men as all enemies she's like I'm not joining your Camp you know how hard it is to leave a camp like that these are groups of people that go through this how about some of the people that are 65 years old that joined a feminist movement at 15 years old never got married have no kids how many of these videos are going viral right now on social media I wish I would have never joined a movement I'm 65 I have a cat no husband no kids what the hell am I working for my parents are dead and it's just me what's that all about so many people choose the wrong enemy and it cost them years if not Decades of their lives you have a person in your life that's challenging you pushing you to get better encouraging you having high expectation of you you think that's the enemy that's not the enemy the actual enemy in your life is the people around you that are saying eat more pizza here's more cheesecake sleep in don't get to work screw your husband hell with your wife I hate hate your boss he's a [ __ ] all he cares about his money those are your enemies you got to step away from those types of people who ruin your life and then 17 years later you used to work with a company that if you would have stuck her and you would have had a nice sex of $2.8 million but you screwed up cuz you believe the other people that quit and you never had that experience and now you're sitting there for the rest of your life trying to explain to your kids why quitting was the right decision but deep down s when you go to sleep and you're in front of the mirror you know what you tell yourself made the biggest mistake I should never done that so this is a very much of a emotional decision for a person to sit there there's a formula on how to find that I've been doing business planning with guys for the last you know business planning you know how it is if you have a sales team H let's sit down do your business planning for 2022 let's do the business plan for 2006 how many years have you been doing the business imagine how many oneone business plans you've done the month of December with people right I would sit there and business plan here's a one-page business plan right and what are your goals for the first quarter and how many calls are you going to make and if you do this what are you going to get yourself I'm going to buy myself a new suit from such and such and Stefano Richie I'm going to buy myself a cclass or M5 or a Range Rover we're going to buy this house and a culde saac and all this other and here's what we're going to do great you have a little bit of dream the rest is logic you write this thing maybe you look at it for a month done you forgot where you even typed it at and you don't remember what's in it after March or April okay where to me eventually got to point where I judged the effective of effectiveness of business plans based on how we would do business plans together and I see how you respond to it where your energy goes how you come out the gates in every year then I said we're finally getting closer at learning how to do better business plans with people because you were able to pursue it and it came down to 12 building blocks six of the building blocks were logical okay we're talking systems processes things like that capital and then six of the blocks were emotional you have to study competition but your competition is not going to drive you the way you identifying your enemy people who have the right enemy in their lives um they'll be willing to tolerate way more pain than those that don't have the right enemy in their lives can you describe why because the point is if you don't do it for the rest of your life the other person's going to be able to say they were right and can you live with that if yes go for it fine if if not you ain't doing it for the money you ain't doing it cuz you need another Lambo or something you're not a car guy we're talking earlier this house you live in that's a palace a place most people around the world would dream about living in this is a e Lamborghini garage that you turn into what you turn into cars don't drive you okay it's not something that fires you up who cares if you pull up in a Lambo okay maybe no this is bigger than that this is about you being able to look at yourself in a mirror and saying I'm proud of you others can say it to you it's great to hear it from your mom and dad it's magical I'm sure you remember when you heard it when your family told you they're proud of you very emotional moment when you hear that right some parents are loving so some parents say the day you're born some parents don't say it until way later on so if you got I'm proud of you very early just because you filled out a piece of paper it doesn't have that big of a meaning but if a parent didn't say that to you about 18 times while you're growing up and then you heard the real I'm proud you at 32 years old you're in the car you're going to cry by yourself it's a very Monumental moment you going to I remember that day when it happened to I was speaking at this office on citos and I pick up my mom from the airport had seen her for seven years since I was in the Army and she sees what I'm doing and where I'm at that 26 years old she's like what happened to you and you said yeah I'm proud of you I remember my dad said it to me I'm proud of you we're driving back from Long Beach uh uh Queen Mary and we're in the car and he sees what happen happened to me and I told him you don't have to work at a 99 cent store ever again at the Englewood right next to Great Western Forum I don't even know how I drove home that night I was flying I wasn't driving it's an incredible feeling but as great as that feels there's going to be a moment where it's you're in the car by yourself you're 43 years old 41 years old 39 years old and you can sincerely say I'm proud of you without low standards that victory Of You versus you is a powerful thing very powerful thing when you go through that so and you're going to need that right enemy to drive you to go through those tough times cuz they're coming they're going to come it's given yes the book is fantastic man where can people follow you and find the book you know go to Value tan or Patrick B David you'll you'll find my content all right everybody if you haven't already be sure to subscribe and until next time my friends be legendary take care peace to learn more about these complex topics check out this episode with the one and only Jordan Peterson man I am beside myself with excitement to have you on and for a few reasons one you've had massive influence over the way that I think and um you have been a guide

Channel: Tom Bilyeu

Views: 154,060

Keywords: Tom Bilyeu, Impact Theory, ImpactTheory, TomBilyeu, Inside Quest, InsideQuest, Tom Bilyou, Theory Impact, motivation, inspiration, talk show, interview, motivational speech, Patrick Bet-David, Choose Your Enemy Wisely, Valuetainment, tombilyeu, Conversations with Tom, Health Theory, mindset, podcasts, how to be successful, entrepreneur, personal growth, success mindset, masculinity crisis, self improvement, power

Id: IfZR0TiO9zQ

Length: 101min 41sec (6101 seconds)

Published: Tue Dec 05 2023