Austin Carlile Story - Former Lead Singer from "Of Mice & Men" interviewed by Ryan Ries

hello Austin check hello you guys have anything you guys want to say it to him oh man thank you guys hi Melanie well let's do this alright so I got a question where'd you grow up and when you grew up we're done were you into any kind of like religion or anything like that we're going right at it yeah start from the start start from the start start that's how nervous I am I'm going to go ahead and give that before we do this do videos like this I'm glad that we played before because I feel totally comfortable doing that give me a mic and just to have a conversation totally out of my element so I'm thank you guys for being here Thank You Ryan thank you for being available you have an amazing story and everyone like I told them everyone's been watching you on Instagram and Twitter and people want to meet you and hear all the details it's just not enough you need a full conversation to hear all the details what's going on with your life when I was when you were talking about blowing away I'm like did you got to tell the world what's going on with you because it's amazing what's happening is even though like there's some dark situations going on there's like amazing awesome things happen that God is doing so thank you for being here yeah I'll start from the beginning on my dad was in the Navy I was born in Pensacola Florida and between the ages of 1 & 2 where and now I've lived in eight states I was all over the place growing up I lived in Florida Arkansas Texas Colorado Ohio California and I was always part of the church my mom and dad had a big heart for youth and for reaching out to youth and you know that was something that I was always solid in my life it was something that I always had when you were growing up when you get introduced to music and other were you like in to export or any other activities yeah since day one I kind of had a connection to music I did a I was one of those guys that did sports and choir and sports and bands all the band people gave me a hard time for doing sports the jocks gave me a hard time for doing music there's people all the way over there and so distracting there's so many familiar faces in the crowd thank you guys for being here tonight it's all good I'm nervous too don't worry you know this is it's hard to get up here and just kind of tell your story when you have all these people looking at you but you know Austin all these people love you here and they're psyched to hear what God is doing in your life yeah I choir and band I actually have a saxophone it was my first instrument it's like this at school you started with the recorder and ever since the saxophone and I did musical theater I was in a play called anything goes I'm syncable Molly Brown I was a broom once for fiddling on the roof and you know I had I you know it was a big part of my life and band was a big part of my life and so it was baseball baseball was the one sport that I excelled at I tried basketball tribe football once everybody got to be as tall as me I had to quit those pretty quick but um you know baseball music was was my things growing up my entire I mean my entire childhood and my dad actually had a radio show and was called the rock and basically it was a church for people who didn't want to go to church and they would do it live on Wednesday nights and replay it on Sunday mornings and he would play classic rock music and apply the messages from the classic rock songs to stories in the Bible into Christ and you know one of my greatest memories some of my greatest memories were sitting there sitting on the floor while they're looking through records and my mom and my dad would actually do the radio show together and just being able to sit there and hear all this different music and ac/dc Journey Boston Rush you name it 38 special Lynyrd Skynyrd and having seen my dad my mom had had Christ was the center of their life and the center of the relationship and they work outwardly and that was there their whole their whole lives for outreach and you know that at a young age I didn't think anything of it I didn't know I just thought you know my parents are always busy they're doing this and it took you know now that I'm an adult it's something I can look back on and really really appreciate a lot more so while they were doing that and I think that's important just like how kind of like the same like our hearts are kind of the same deal is we want to reach out to you because the state of the culture and what's happening that there's so much like hopelessness anxiety depression I mean how many people do you guys know here that as someone witnessed some of that committed suicide and your family friends maybe you know people that have anxiety depression you know I think anxiety right now there's one up here no but that that's so common and you know there's nothing new Under the Sun this stuff has been happening for years and his parents had that same call and as I look at your life you're you pretty much you've been singing that stuff through through your songs as well what was your relationship with your parents when you were growing up I was at mama's boy you know my dad was a very he's watching this so I dad you know my dad was a great father because he was strict because he he taught me a by his actions and B by disciplining me and I know that that doesn't go over well and today's generation but I was spanked my mouth was washed out with soap and it was done out of love and you know my parents would always say we're doing this because we love you we're doing this because you don't we understand and we don't want you to do make the same mistakes we made and oh man I hated my dad for growing up you know he was the worst going and making me work construction and pulling wire and doing electrical sockets and picking up stuff and he'd come to baseball practice after baseball practice was done and I'd be sitting there for two more hours he'd make me run around the bases and fly balls so it was dark and you know catch it I can't catch a dad is dark you know that was that was my dad he pushed me he pushed me but I think it's because he saw potential and I was so young you know when your 12 13 14 15 16 17 heck 2029 you think you know it all and you think that you have it all figured out and the older you get the real very quickly you find that you don't it's true very true you got a phone call from from your grandma one night what was skipping well between uh no the photo of your mom just came up with you yeah yeah between the ages of fifteen and seventeen through kind of a crazy event my parents actually got a divorce and I was in Colorado at the time and by the way I was I was an only child my mother had had a second child that wasn't able to make it I think it was six or seven years old and we actually I lived in an orphanage for a time in Arkansas and Texas Arkana because my parents were the house parents my parents that's how much their hearts were or to outreach towards kids and I went for being an only child to having 1617 brothers and sisters and you know they split when I was 14 or 15 and my mother and I we moved to Florida which was where I was originally born and I've been in Florida as my junior year of high school and it's funny I got to Florida when I was in the summer before school started and my mom's like okay you have to get a job and you should find a job where there's people that go to your school so I'm trying to figure out okay well how am I going to know you know where am I going to go and I was leaving a Walmart one day and there's a chick-fil-a I love chick-fil-a and I went in and all of the girls at the front were just very pretty girls and I kept asking where what do you guys go to school where do you all where you where do you go oh we're all from lianna we all go to Lehigh I got a job at chick-fil-a um I it's one of the only fast-food restaurants they'll still eat but uh I worked in the back so I didn't get to work up front with everybody but I made a lot of friends and started school that year and I actually got fired from chick-fil-a because at night I would bring home the chicken with the people on the back and my mom would make me breakfast in the morning with like eggs and chicken potatoes and she would always go to work and I have to get myself up out of bed get myself to school and I got fired for taking chicken but they would just reuse it for the chicken salad the next day and so we all you didn't yeah that's don't eat the chicken salad maybe but but uh you know that that job led me to work at a barbecue restaurant it's called dawn Haney's barbecue and I started as a host and I don't know I guess that did well they moved me to wait up to being a waiter and it was right next to an airport and the cool thing about being a waiter is you have to have conversations with people it's also could be the downside of being a waiter but there's being an airport there people would fly in from all over so oh we're from Texas oh I lived there before oh we're from here here here and so it was a cool environment for me to be in post I got free barbecue and you know life was pretty peachy I mean you know the divorce was really hard on me I still knew my mom and dad loved each other and now even in hindsight and knowing things that I know now they were going to get back together which is something that's so beautiful to me but when I was working one night I got a phone call for my mother and I didn't answer and then about half an hour later I got a phone call from my grandmother I did an answer and then I got another phone call from my grandma didn't answer and the third phone call I went to the bathroom and I answered and it was my Nana and she said she said your mom fell over at the restaurant they were at beanies cafe I specifically remember she said your mom collapsed at the restaurant and she's being rushed to the hospital and the hospital ended up being the hospital that was about a mile from the barbeque restaurant and I do we have a picture of my mom we can throw up there yeah we can put her back up yeah that's my mom and I as soon as I got as soon as I learned that from my grandma I started panicking and shaking and I couldn't I couldn't think I couldn't I couldn't function and I needed to drive I couldn't drive one of the waitresses drove me to the hospital and as I was pulling up to the hospital the ambulance in which my mom was in was pulling in at the same time pulled right behind behind them and the last time I saw my mom was them pulling her out of the ambulance two hours later she passed away and all the way up until that point I mean I was a pretty good kid I got good grades now I was polite my parents will let me do things late at night because I knew that you know I could take care of myself and if it affects your grades son then you know you have to have this and you know I was I mean I didn't even listen to secular music until I was 14 15 I think one of my first records that was secular was the Backstreet Boys and think Christina Aguilera and up until that night you know I had a very strong what I thought a very strong relationship of Christ and you know I was plugged in I was in the church I was doing outreach I was working with my parents and that moment that my grandmother and I were sitting in a special side room that they have in emergency rooms the doctor came in and said that my mother was gone and they said that you know you can come come and you can visit the body one last time and I didn't go I didn't want to go as soon as I got that news my grandma went left to go see my mother and I ran out the front door of the hospital and I literally threw my middle fingers in the air and I cursed God I cursed the God that I was raised to follow I cursed the God that I was raised hearing about every day and being set an example by every day I couldn't understand how he could do something like this my mother was my world my entire world and I was absolutely devastated in that night for the next month two months three months I tried cigarettes for the first time drinking for the first time drugs for the first time sex for the first time Grand Theft Auto breaking and entering violence I did what lots of people do I did what many people may have done in that situation I don't know how many people had been in that situation but I was so angry at God and I was so angry at the past 17 years of my life I felt like I had been lied to and I took it out on basically myself and I was directly doing this in spite of God I want I I didn't I was mad at God and I wanted him I didn't want anything to do with him from from that moment on he's heavy heavy stuff so why all the stuff was going on obviously you're you're diving right into this whole this whole lifestyle that I think fair to say a lot of people dive into you when they're going through hurt or they want to escape from stuff that's going on their life this is kind of like the to go to you to drugs alkyl to drinking sleep it around whatever whatever they can fill that empty void that they're trying to fill how long was that last thing you said for in a month you experimented in all the stuff but how long did that lifestyle last until you got into the to the band like how long were you just going out after self-destruction mode I mean I was in self-destruction mode up until God came back into my life few years ago but music became the thing that I relied on music became my outlet music became I'm gonna miss this way music became what I said was what saved me you know I had all this stuff that happened in my life after my mother passed I lived alone for a while I was experimenting with all these different things and all these things that I shouldn't have been doing I moved back to Colorado with my dad I hated high school I hated middle school in elementary school too so in December I graduated early and I moved to Ohio still don't understand really why I went to Ohio but uh I moved I moved to Ohio and you know that's where music started becoming my center it started with me going to hardcore shows and I don't mean hardcore how many how you guys might think I mean hardcore like punk rock hardcore 50 dudes in a room beating the crap out of each other with anything that can but they're all friends so they're walking out there with no sleeves and and I was always like the littler guy Austin go punch that guy in the back of the head and boom then he turned around to fight me and everyone would jump him and you know I ran around with guys with shaped heads and tattoos and ears and face tats and and I still run around with those kind of guys but these were the kind of guys that were a bad influence and a lot of them were great dudes great guys but that action that influence and I just started going down a very wrong path very wrong path and music was then in Ohio when I actually started discovering that it's something that kind of took the edge off of it and I found a way to to make music and I found a way that you know music came and it made everything so much easier and I could express myself music and I could write all of these feelings out and get them out through music and you know and it was the first time I in my first band it was called attack attack and a few of you guys may know Anna and you know are the only record I did with them from when I started doing music till today I think when I first started doing music after my mother I passed was when I really kind of felt God tugging on my heart and I felt him pulling but I wasn't walking the same way I was he was dragging me the opposite direction and music was the one thing so our first record if you read the lyrics if you go back and read the tak-tek self-titled it's like a praise album I mean I was saying hallelujah and I was talking about Jesus's love and grace and saved by grace and my heart was there my actions were not I was plugged in and wasn't connected and I ended up getting kicked out of the band because I was drinking and doing drugs and Hermosillo sex on tour and we were supposed to be a Christian band Monson years later everyone went down the same path the band broke up and now they're doing separate things but right after I left that band it's what compelled me to start of my Sandman and I came home from tour and I lived in a little tiny studio apartment and had just enough room on the outside of the window so that you could escape but it was a brick wall like and and in Ohio and you know music was always that outlet for me it was always something that I relied on you know mice and men began in Ohio me and my friend Jackson hall from New Zealand he was actually in The Chronicles of Narnia the movie first split second but uh and we were looking for four members and one of our first supposed hopefully maybe he'll be our drummer was the drummer of twenty one pilots and and we were like I don't know about this guy we I don't know you gotta tell him about that text oh yeah they want a Grammy and I was like aren't you glad you weren't you didn't join him ISIL men but you know we I had a guy that I thought was going to be the drummer and I was already sent his desktop background was this drummer from Chula Vista California and it was his name is valentino Artie Agha and in some I drew the drunk the first drummer of Of Mice and Men his background on his computer was T no because he was such a huge fan and you know we put out a song we got we got signed off of one song it was when myspace was around who in this room real quick had in my space okay all right however level with that and you know we put out a song that's signed but we only had two members of the band so we're like well what should we do and people I was working with at the time we're like you should move to California we'll try to start finding you band members and one of the first myspace messages I got that I ever kind of fangirled was when Valentino from lower definition sent me on myspace message asking to be in the band and I was so stoked so the guy had to go the desktop background became realized and I moved from Ohio all the way to California Jackson and I built it and from there we had different tryouts and you know we had the band of how it is you know now I'm sure I don't need to go into the story and demand was successful you know right off the bat we started doing great shows and and opening for bands and doing our own headliners and going on Warped Tour and headlining Warped Tour and playing all these things and before before before we started playing with big groups before we started I guess you know when you're in the music industry you do it for the right reasons that's my motto but there's a lot of people that don't adhere to that and sometimes when you work with managers and labels and all of those things that convoluted and before things started to get convoluted when everything was amazing everything was great I was in a rock band girls were talking to me finally no girls ever would talk to me in high school and middle school and you know and you know drinking and drugs and the whole nine yards you know we were killing it we were doing great and it was on the last work tour that we did there was a party going on in our bus our bus was always the party bus that would do this at night because we all be dancing in it every crowd serve people but I crawled out the roof and I was sitting on the rooftop of our bus and I called my dad and you know I said dad there's got to be more than this and I called him I said I'm so unhappy and my heart is so hurt and I said none of the stuff that I'm doing is filling that void and I told my dad I just felt such emptiness all of those things that I had accomplished from I didn't go to college I finished high school early and all of those things that I had accomplished they I was still so empty inside because I felt something missing and no not my mom or my grandparents had passed or any of this what I was missing was was my room my relationship with God what I was missing was the one thing that I knew in my life that no matter what where when how whatever circumstance that I had and you know my dad basically told me that night he said us and your your what you're doing is fulfilling you and you're doing this but it's not fulfilling your spirit your soul and you know I always describe that conversation is just me describing to end the emptiness of the emptiness we see from Chris Cornell committing suicide to Chester committing suicide the you know these guys were in giant rock bands twice my age and they were feeling the same exact thing that mean at the age of 26 25 was feeling that darkness that emptiness and during that time I remember I was phonics I saw my friend Paul Gomez at the other Nepali he's over he was a big part of of connecting the dots with our whole relationship he he actually helped start early clothing brand and so he's always been a taste maker in the industry he's connected with you know the Vans Warped Tour guys and the whole deal he's just known him for a long time and I've been wife on his Instagram we reconnected and then I started seeing photos of you popping up surfacing with you and and tall and and I think Fieldy and a group of different people that he was he was born in doing and around that time I went to agenda tradeshow with Paul and we were walking down the hall we were we were there about the famous booth twitch was there tall you me Paul and maybe a couple other guys and I just ended up in the circle I knew a couple of guys I didn't know you and me and you ended up we were standing right next to each other and I knew you am I going that's that's you know that's that's Austin and sitting in I don't even know how or what because obviously you were drunk and high right yeah extremely and I was sitting there and we bumped shoulders and I don't even know what we start tall we were talking and you're like yeah man I live in on I live in Costa Rica and I just out of my head I'm like dad that's and goes but you are you're damage that Costa Rica that's one of us you said that my dad lives in Costa Rica and I'm like oh man oh my did I od'd in Costa Rica you're like what I'm like because I did excited to manage a professional skateboarding and I was traveling I did a bunch of cocaine and zanuck and od'd common common common toast to like kill people and you were like oh my gosh that's crazy so we started talking and I forget you said something like you know yeah my dad's a pastor and he's just he's just down there in Costa Rica you know doing a church and I thought to myself because see I I grew up as a pastor's kid too and very and often have very similar stories in the sense of like bad things happened to us in our life and we both threw our metal fingers up to God and went our own ways to pursue success and everything ended up empty but here I am and he says that my dad's a pastor so I was like okay this guy knows the truth and if he's anything like me and I started talking about Jesus and he ain't down with Jesus he's going to tell me to where to go you know I'm saying because that's what I would do I'd be like get you you know Jesus character out here I don't want to deal with you right now I'll punch you in the face you know so but it was cool because interesting enough right after he made that phone call to his dad pouring his heart out saying man I'm empty God immediately starts working hasn't connected with Paul Gomez then he brings me into his life I hear I get that little nugget I'm a pastor's kid you know he's doing his thing he smells like booze I'm like cool so from there basically what happened to that a year after the year after that you uh a year after that a funcle' you called your dad I'm sorry and I got lost of my notes oh yeah so basically after agenda we met I just kind of started just watching what was going on and then I ended up going to a concert at Jacksonville Florida and it was a huge lineup I mean I went there to go see corn but there's all these other bands playing from Slayer to you guys to all these other guys and we showed up there and I was walking backstage with my niece and I saw you and I was like hey what's good man how you doing we were just kind of chopping up but then this huge storm came in and I mean if you've ever been back he's like a hurricane like literally they had to shut down the venue and evacuate everyone and I just saw him I'm like dude we're in the corn batter in the corn backstage and when you think of backstage like this glamour saying we were in a trailer it was trailer it was a trailer and lives in a trailer the trailer yeah a very low-budget trailer and we're all packed in there with all of us we had feel the head you know I show the corn guys we had more your drummer I mean we're all we're all here hanging out and because of that storm we all got stuck in there to get and that's when you got introduced to the people part of the whosoever's movement which is all the corn guys and all these guys so that was the beginning I was so nervous hey man want to come join me I'm going to corns greenroom what hey yo you're going to wear good quote I mean hey they've sold 60 70 80 million records no big deal I think of mice and men has sold probably 1 million of all of our records combined so Thursday to get a very blessed that's great but thank you for buying them but uh hey hey I want to say equally though all the all the dudes had and clearly all those they're all fanning out geeking out on Austin they're like sick Austin's in in the young dudes in here they're there they're all old old guys we're the old guys we're all hanging out look here comes the young guys sick they were geeking out - alright it was a geek fest but yeah we were there yeah what stoked I'm good to go to hang out with corn and brought Valentino with me he was the only sober guy at the time and I was like you gotta come with me man I can't do this alone so we got to hang out corn and I met Seeley and head and through that I met Frank ovis Govi he does all my tattoo well the good side this side where I was literally 16 17 years old and thought I knew it all and I thought I wanted Microsoft clipart on my body for the rest of my life but yeah that was my introduction to those guys and that was you know we met at agenda met again at the Green River time we exchanged an exchange numbers that's that's when I talk to right now as I came and I'd love to like stay connected and in my head of my yeah you know score for sure I want to stay connected but I saw something and and even from having conversations with those guys had had story really resonated with me I mean they were in a big big rock band when Rock was doing with it was just a whole nother animal than what it is now and his stories like mine times 20 with the experiences and drugs and all these things and his story really resonated with me and it really um it impacted me it didn't uh I didn't flip over and change my life and I didn't rededicate my life to Christ right away but it was something that kept burning inside of me and kept calling inside of me and it's just something that was always on my heart from that from that moment on because I think when you open it's true and you start opening your heart to God and you say God you know like when you make that commitment you're like like I want you in my life but you don't literally start following them he'll start like moving things around in your life and start drawing you to himself that's that's what he does by the Holy Spirit and during that time Paul go Paul Gomez invites you to come to a shine study I was doing in Orange County and it was actually filled eat on this story for the first time basically very similar format to what we're doing right now so now we're all at shine and often often comes that pops up backstage and we're like sick Austin's here so that happens he tells the story and then at the end of that you come up to me and you're like hey man I want to meet up with you like something happened to you that night whatever was said from the stage but you're like dude I want to connect with you outside of here and meet up so we ended up meet up for lunch one time and you told me about your story and and but this is I'm going to say one comment that you did say and you can talk a little bit more about it but I remember you tell me you're like man right now I want to give my life to God you were tell me where you're at in your in your life be like I want to give my life to God but I don't want to be a poser Christian like I'm not ready to commit right now because I don't want to be like a fake you know some of you guys you know I'm a skateboarder so like if I dress as a skateboarder and I have skateboards and I go to the park and maybe I don't even go to the park I just have skateboards and I look like escape when I post pictures say I'm I'm scared I'm like posing to be something them just like if you get musicians if you get an instrument act like you're ripping on the guitar on Instagram you show the photo but you don't even know to play you're like you're posing to be your poseur so in the same way he was like and that's why it is what Christians - he's like I want to do it right I want to be basically I want my yes as the BSS of my nose of he knows I want to stand for something and I don't want to say one thing and do another because it's a bad example he's like I want God to do something in my life but I don't want to be a poser and I respected that because like okay I get it because that's I know for me that's the way it has to be when you give your life to God you have to like you have to be in it I'm not saying you're going to make mistakes you're all going to make me all make mistakes across centers by default but he knew in his heart that he wanted to get it right but he just wasn't ready right there at that point but tell them a little bit more about that conversation what God was doing in your life at that point yeah like he said I wasn't the selfish side of me I wasn't ready to give up what I was doing I enjoyed having sex with my girlfriend I enjoyed going out and drinking you know these are all things that you know I was more of an adult and I toned down a lot since when I was young but it was still things that I saw that God was pulling on my heart that I needed to cut out of my life not because of this reason or this radiator because this was worse than that it was all sin and God was showing me that my sin what was what was coming in between me and then and I really felt that call especially after hearing Fieldy tell me his tell his story kind of like this you know and I just thought of it like well if he can do it I can do it and if head can do it I can do it and you know that my mind started working but at the same time I didn't want to give up self I want to give up my flesh and you know I had I had a you know I had a big struggle you know we went back on tour after that played around the world you know things started going a little down with my health and you know at the same time you know I really felt God calling me to do something and in my mind I felt God you know maybe I just need to do a side project or you know maybe I should write a book and talk about this or I didn't know I felt God calling me to do more than just being of mice and men and that's actually during our last record that we recorded a gold world and it's so fresh for me just two days ago in my storage unit I don't have a house and I also I'm living in Costa Rica pretty much but it's going through my storage unit and I don't want furniture in there I don't own furniture I have about twelve canisters of fan letters and mail because I've never been able to throw them away I always love the question like did you read my letter and I'm like half the time 50% of the time yeah I guarantee you I read it the other half no but I still have it no matter how old it is and you know I was going through my storage unit and I saw an old journal from when we were recording our last record and from the left side of the page to the right side of the page seeing where my heart was calling me to write and where my heart was reaching out to the whole time I was I was in the studio I've something called Marfan syndrome it's a genetic tissue disorder it's a connective tissue disorder its genetic it ended up being what my mother passed away from forgot to add that in there they thought she had a heart attack she had an aneurysm and it's genetic so once they found out she had it they checked me for it and then that's um when you're 17 years old you get told you can't ride on rollercoasters you can't work out can't skydive you can't can't do certain types of drugs you're bummed and that was another reason that I was so upset but I was going through this journal and just seeing where my heart and what my heart was really wanting to write about what my heart was screaming out of what I what I needed and the entire time writing that's the album and going through it I was coming off of a bunch of medication because I didn't want to be on this stuff anymore from antidepressants to pain medication to I mean you name it you know doctors now they they'll give you anything and that's dangerous and you know you know it was a struggle for me to even get up out of bed in the morning it was a struggle for me to write to record I was doing physical therapy everyday occupational therapy every day aqua therapy every day and then going to the studio and recording vocals going to bed waking up doing over and over and a lot of that record you know I kind of a lot of the other members which God bless them they stepped up and they had to write there's about six songs on the record five songs on the record I didn't write a word to and it was the other people on our band even hard even our drummer you know wrote lyrics of it and keep heat man I can't praised a team David it real name's David Valentino's David you know he wrote some of the songs even because we just I was a chain I was another link of the chain that was out because I was going through all this inner turmoil and it was one day I was I was writing in that journal and I pushed pushed it away and I said god I can't do this anymore I can't have one foot on this side of the rope and what foot on this side of the road this side was going the way the world was going this side was going where Christ was leading me and I was in both I worked with living the dream Foundation and you know I was spending time with terminally ill children because that was where my heart was I was you know even still trying to witness to people behind closed doors on stage doing this you know we usually don't even custom the music and get the ass up getting super stoked and this was something that I was having such an inner struggle with writing a record where my heart was leading me to do something different and like I said when I push that book away I just pray to God I can't do this and I said I want you to use my mind my body my voice all of me and I said I want you I want to use everything that I am for your glory from here on out and I felt the biggest weight and the biggest release off of my shoulders the album was done it led me to me back with you meeting number two the second meeting and we sat there eating the same bomb Mexican foods and Sharky's nachos and we met and you just got back from your physical therapy and I was like okay now what and you were like God was doing something your life you're like I want to make some changes and you just poured out your heart and I go okay I'm going to give you a Bible and I gave you a Bible and I laid my hands on you and I prayed for you so what the heck happened after that because there was a big change when you get that Bible you know the Bible is the Word of God it uh you know I wasn't eating it was the Holy Spirit through the Bible it wasn't the Bible Bibles piece of paper it's what's inside of it it's the story it's it's you know people the Bible's not real this is this it's Scripture it was lost here missing chapters there's all kinds of theology and all of us that goes into it but not D Mark Luke and John we had a song our first record called the great handouts key maybe it's the second record okay but it says read this book you were meant to live it all means so much to me but know what's written in red and in the Bible what's written in red is what Jesus said to what Jesus talked about and I I just remember going through that Bible and and the things that I read the most and I studied the most for what Jesus talked about in his life and how he all he did was all he did was what I was then trying to do my whole life and what my all he did when I was trying to do my whole life but he did it the right way and he did it twenty thousand fold he just loved people and and I know like some of the ogee guys here and Darla's Susie hi guys ed Jessica you know I love you guys you know I've always loved on you Susie here I had a signing once with the game great rapper he left early cuz we still had a big line and I saw I saw Susie I like Susie come come sit down with me and she did the rest of the signing with me you know that's never been something that's been out of my life but what was out of my life was that relationship and that connection with the creator of the entire universe and with reading that Bible man in getting back into the work and you know becoming sober in my mind and having you know I was stopped taking all of these crazy medications that the doctors were giving me and I started you know on my own you trying to get these things out of my life and you know it really led me to you God led me to come to the point where I was not just talking the talk I needed to walk the walk and I had never been baptized and and you know baptism doesn't save you baptism doesn't baptism as a symbolism of you becoming a new person in Jesus Christ and the reason I had never been baptized was because I didn't want oh there it is I guess you know what eventually happened and I never put that dies because like like you said when I first met you I I don't want to be a poser Christian I didn't want to be that guy that proclaims Christ and then his scene with two girls walking into his bus drinking of Jack Daniel's bottle because that's not what Christ is and that's not a reflection of Christ and I couldn't bring myself to become baptized because I didn't want him to be that bad example and it it took it took God to instance the moment I opened up my heart and the moment I realized and I admitted and I confessed of all of these things that I did and that I could I was nothing without him without that relationship and I remember when I texted you and we were I was talking to Ryan about wanting to be baptized and the biggest reason I wanted to is because you know my walk with God was becoming so much stronger you know and I had a I had an ex-girlfriend who I loved to this day she was a great woman I couldn't be with her because she didn't understand why I would want to put God in front of our relationship she didn't understand why I wanted to step away from having sex four times a day so that I so that I could so that I could terminate or half-man half-machine she didn't understand that I wanted to follow my heart for God above her I want her to follow my heart for God for God above anything and hey it's hard I think one of the hardest parts is when you're seeing when you're trying to follow God and you're not sleeping around that's like that's that's one of the hardest denials of self yeah it's been two years it's been appreciated but this that system was in Laguna Beach right uh Pirates Cove and um my drummer was there his girlfriend just had lunch with them miss those guys but uh the biggest reason I wanted to get baptized I was home from tour for about four days and the tour we were about to embark on was a summer tour opening up for Marilyn Manson and Slipknot and I mean pretty sure those guys have some sinners that come to their shows Marilyn Manson actually burns Bibles and Alice Cooper told not to burn the Bible he gave him he said Marilyn I know you burn Bibles y'all this one's signed to you so do not burn this one so Marilyn kept it I I didn't want to get lost again I felt God pulling me back so much that and I was ready to I was ready to fully commit to serve Him to follow him and two days before I think it's the day before we left for the tour Ryan baptized me and I said I wanted to do it because I wanted to be a light in the darkness and my dad something my dad had told me was the light shines the brightest in the dark and with everything that I was doing in my life all of the things that I had cut out of my life you know God was finally telling me that it was time it was time to take up that cross and fully follow him and that was the first step that I took and um you know when I'll Torah was slipping on became super close with Cory and his kid crazy just like a mini little CT his wife all of their crew such as it's so funny when you go on these bands or these tours with these bands like they're rock stars and they come to come like an hour before the show and they they're out you know we're the opening band we're there all day and we get to hang out with their crew and man just awesome crew awesome tour and after that we came back I think we think we had a week two weeks off and we went to the UK to start a start another tour and it was pretty worn out from from the summer tour and just to give you the Reader's Digest version of some of my story up until that point I had had foot surgery two ear surgeries hip surgery rib surgery heart surgery let me hang a little I guess I am half-man half-machine um and you know even on that tour I busted cracked my heel open because I jumped into a pool that was only four foot tall you ever came out - oh yeah at one of the shows that doesn't show tonight I did a song with corn which is awesome but before that I had to go to the ER because my rib had popped out so I went to the ER they popped it back in and then I went and did my song what corn couldn't miss it but that was my personality that's just how I am you know I mean I got it from my dad I break an arm and have the bone popping out playing soccer shake it off like shake the bone back into my arm death and we were on it was the I mean September 27th was the day we got there my butch was my birthday and so my 20 my 29th birthday was in Europe and the tour started and my help to start ages - and every night I was on stage and I would be pushing to scream and it takes like you know it takes a lot to really get that sound that projection and I kept having convulsions and charley horses and my body was shaking and I would collapse and I kept singing kept performing and the last show that we ended up ever playing as a full band I was in so much pain that I was balled up like say here's the stage about this size and I was in the back sitting in the corner all my on the ground and finished the song and I turned around to look at Tino to start the next song and he'd left the drum set and he said we're not we can't continue on when I'm not going to we're not going to finish the set and let you kill yourself and we had to fly home that night or start we had to cancel the tour that night I flew home I think it was the next day went to Stanford which is where I had my heart surgery rib hip and they ended up finding out that every time I was screaming it was tearing ripping it's called a dural sac that surrounds your spine and as fluid inside of it to protect your spine and because I was screaming so hard which is why I always got offended that people said I wasn't doing it right I was really pushing and I was screaming so hard that my spinal fluid was leaking out into my body and it was causing me to have convulsions and seizures and that was tore for me I had I had like thirteen epidurals once a month I'd go get trigger point injections which were like twenty to thirty shots up and down my spine just so that I could tour but this time was kind of it was it and it was it was locked over and the whole whole month of October I was in the hospital getting these tears fixed and within the first two weeks my specialists at Austin like we've been telling you this for seven years but now you can't you can't do this anymore you got to stop you got to listen to your body and I grew I think more in my faith that month of being in the hospital after learning that and I think I did the whole rest of my life know before my life because I saw that I was on my path serving God doing the right thing I was on I was doing what I wanted to do serving God but it took God going putting the brakes on it putting me in the hospital for a month saying no no I want you to follow me and do what I've called you to do while serving me and what a stark difference that is yeah it's um sometimes you think that uh you know God's going to pull you out of what you love like a lot of people say I got you to think I'm not going to follow God because if I fall God it's going to be boring I was going to suck I'm going to miss out on everything and what I found out even for my personal life is I've managed a professional skateboarding my work in the music industry forever but then when I finally gave my life to God and I was miserable because I was indulging all this in the self body appetite stuff that not so sin is all that stuff that you indulge it that you're miserable doing anyway but you keep doing it that's that's basically sin is you don't want to do it but you keep doing it because you're you should do it and it was until when I gave my life to God that now I'm doing way more he's still using the fact that I've worked in the music industry so worked in the skate industry marketing graphic design you in advance I'm doing more than I ever did and but God had to get my attention as well and put me on hold so no doubt God has big plans for you and he just had to get he had he sometimes he has to put those brakes on like you said to get our attention and it's way easier just to like give him your attention right now haven't got to take you through a situation because when God has a call in your life see we're all created for a purpose you have the plan you were all created for a purpose in life and you go through your whole life and never know what it is or you could get to the point where you just go god I want to know why I'm even here put here on earth because you're all here on earth for a reason says that God created you he need you together when you were in your mother's womb you know his thoughts the thoughts of love for you from the Father God towards you or more than the sanz's of see think about that how many sand pieces of sands are in the sea that's the way he how much he loves you and he has a plan for you and he does take us through trials and tribulations to get our attention so that we can find out why we were created he could use us for this this purpose that he has for us so here he is he gets your attention and now you're in a place where you have to decide what's going to go on with the band and your father's down in in Costa Rica yeah I throughout the hospital stay I was keeping in touch you know Alan and Tino and talking and I waited the whole month while I was there to tell them what I'd learned and it was the day I got out of the hospital was November 1st we had a meeting we had a meeting and I think it was Tino's house apartment and I had the whole band come and I said guys everything that just happened and everything that just went through my doctor said I gotta call it I got to stop and I said I have to quit this and I said I'm going to go to Costa Rica because I feel like gods are doing something in my life and I said I gotta quit and I got to walk away from this and I got to do what I want I got a I got to put myself into a position where I can listen to God where I can absorb what he's calling me to do and I said but because of what of mice and men is because of what we have done together I said I want you guys to continue on I had a conversation with a super close friend of mine oh why didn't they change the name they should have quit well I can't believe they abandoned their boy like I wanted them to continue on because this tattoo and whoever has those tattoos because those lyrics that I wrote pain you make me sick gray and Dow ski second and Sebring you know those stories were about me that was my journal those songs that they still play on tour I wrote those songs about my life about my struggles and I wrote those songs because I knew there were so many people that were going through the same thing divorce suicidal thoughts depression feeling alone and just because I had to lose my career who would I be to take away from for other people's and I wanted them to continue on and and I knew they could you know I knew Erin could take it on he did they're doing great they're on tour now they're doing their thing that's their past God had something else planned for me the very next day I flew to Costa Rica my doctor said I needed to take six they said four to six months it's been eight but they said I needed to take time and rest be in the water you know rejuvenating they said I've been on tour for 10 12 years of my life straight just demolishing my body because that's why I loved and when you love something the world says find something you love and let it kill you that's what I was doing but that's not right because God was always calling me to do more than just lay down my physical body for this he was calling me to talk about that story and share that story and he's still calling me to do things and in that eight months of being in Costa Rica and being separated and a couple of those months not even having a foam like I wasn't ignoring you guys I wasn't doing whatever I was separating myself from all of those distractions so that I could hear what Christ was trying to tell me to do and you know leading the band I'm sorry even the band was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life that band was my baby that band was my life I bought our first van I don't I don't have any money now I don't have any money then I bought our first van my dad bought our first trailer and then he backed into it in and but I knew that what God was calling me to do was so much more important than anything that I could even fathom and and and in Costa Rica and being away from there I started learning that I started or maybe it's a look Sunset Station what's for dinner whatever we catch you know I was in the jungle every Thursday we teach baseball I don't know is there a picture of it yeah these are some of my guys that's the baseball field and say that's this way this is the opposite direction that's the beach and we would play from 4 o'clock and to the cents so I'm playing baseball with these kids that can't speak English learning on my Spanish I know muscleman else but uh you played a band together it didn't like to some music of the Church of it well okay they tried to get me a scene at church I wasn't feeling it I was just like I need to can I had name I just wasn't feeling it and one day something was squeaking in the monitors okay this is a great church our church is about just you guys this section there's no walls there's the only four and outside of the walls it's just the jungle literally there's horses that walk by stray dogs wander and stray people wandering wandering and it's it's a it's a church in the jungle and the monitor was going off and I ran to the sound board six two sixes I know how to do it made it better and then I just kept going back to the sound board and now I'm doing sound at our church so the churches we get together every morning like 8:30 starts at 10:00 and like the band's mess around or they're talking and I'm trying to get levels I'm like hey stop messing around up there it's funny being on that side of it now and why they play I'm back their lives mixing it training up these things and Craig if you're watching this be played bongos I was turned in way down because he's off-key like off tempo I love being able to do that and that's not what I want to do for the rest of my life but it's something that I love being able to be there and be with the church and be with my dad and be with the ministry and my new family and my two little hermanos I think they're watching better get better grades you're not going to get your phone back and God was just really really working through my life and these past months being there and I was I was off I didn't come out with the cane I was off the cane doing great and I started this procedure every three weeks they would do 30 injections my spine my hips and my legs because not everything was resolved from last October I was still feeling so bad still wake up in morning and pants still wake up I'd still would have at night my lights would do this and Charlie horses and I got to the point where I had to go to the hospital I had basically like an attack on my legs and I couldn't use them and I woke up the next day and I couldn't couldn't use my legs at all and this was three months ago my dad physically had to carry me into the emergency room I remember giving him a hard time like come on pop why you struggling so much you could do this and once I was there they didn't know what was wrong I got to take a super cool helicopter ride to San Jose Costa Rica to a bigger Hospital and while I was there they found two cysts growing on my low spine and their first reaction you know it's a coaster it's a flattened country they can we have to operate you have cancer Wow like I'm freaking out I'm like what like I don't even know how to how do you sit como CDC cancer in Espanola no cancer cancer a it so I was freaking out like great God like shipped me out of the band you did this he brought me to Costa Rica I've been growing I've been learning you know I still struggle in my health helps whatever now like I got the might have cancer and I have and texted my cardiologist my team from Stanford is like don't let them do anything to you come to Stanford so it was four weeks ago I went to Stanford within the first two days MRI CT scan cat scan old as they found out that the cysts are not cancer thank God and the sister on cancer there they're leaving than end because because of my condition their normal which doesn't make sense but they're not causing any damage and what they did find was that when I was a kid my mom used to have to come into my my room two three four nights a week because I would just be screaming bloody murder because my legs were Charlie washing and shaking and she'd have to rub my legs give me ibuprofen and put me in the bathtub because my legs were just violently shaking and in pain and I found out on this last trip that what I've actually been having is from the back down my entire life is I've been having seizures and that's why all those years of being on stage and sure to do that super loud was causing my body to have seizures um [Music] and I was like wow it's it it suck to know that there was nothing they could just clip and get out of there and fix and I could go again and I learned that in order for me to get better and in order for me to get off the cane I'm on it's going to take a lot of hard work and it's going to take me everyday I have physical therapy I have a nutritionist now hi if you're watching and I'm doing stretches and exercises things that I should have been doing since I was 18 years old 17 years old because Marfan syndrome it's a connective tissue disorder it literally your bones grow longer yet your muscles grow smaller as you get older and it's very painful Rachel there's someone there's one person in this whole crowd that has more fans it's rare and I know you know how hard it is and but God is using that you know before I was dealing with mental issues spiritual issues and now that the only thing I have to deal with is physical piece of cake piece of cake because this this is going to be dead at 50 60 70 I don't want to live to 90 I know what 29 feels like but this is so the mikaelsons vapor it's dust and the fact that I have to struggle and get my body back and that's something I have to work on bring it on because guess who I have on my side I forgot of the universe I just I had an analogy the other day the Holy Trinity Jesus God the Holy Spirit I always see them as a three ones in front of me leading the way ones on the side of me walking with me it ones behind me pushing me and all three of them carry me when I can't walk I'm getting choked up up here hon it's true it's true and often I would like to uh you know this is towards the end obviously this is where you're at right now they'd heard the story they've heard the good times the bad times they've heard about what God's been doing in your life and is there any last words that you would like to say to everyone that's here maybe there's people here that are wrapped up in different religions maybe there's people that are atheist agnostic maybe people they're just in maybe jaded by religion which is common maybe someone misrepresented Jesus Christ to them bad example people could be here dealing with the same condition like you said there was one girl Rachel I mean there's even other people here that are suffering with anxiety suffering with depression addictions things that have happened you know when you're growing up that you aren't responsible for people or go through many different things I mean that's that's why we do what we do is because we've been there we've come out of it we're still dealing with stuff from our past life but we've seen a transformation in our life as we give in our life to to God you know the Word of God says that he transforms us and it says that whosoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved whosoever we always laugh because it's like what is whosoever it's all encompassing it's anyone the word whosoever means anyone everyone and if you walk away from with one thing tonight besides a taco you don't have to change tap got it except you no matter what you do you don't have to change that God except you accepts you exactly how you are and you know you hear I'll just quote Ryan those guys holding up the scientists says God hates those guys are Kooks that's what he said now it's not God Dennis then but no matter what it is from stealing a car and taking it to where your cousin says because you're think you're just picking it up for them to fix it but they're just going to take all the tires and parts or somebody else whatever it may be sin is sin and God takes you as you are you don't have to change to come to God when you come to God and you open up your heart to his spirit and to have that relationship with him he changes you and it's you know I've seen stories of work overnight oh wow whoa and but then I've seen stories of me it's a slow process because God God chips away at all those things in your life that are holding you back like I said that sin it was holding me back from him God starts chipping away at all of that and he puts you through these things he puts he's putting me through this fire just like when they get gold there's dirt and all these rocks in it and it's his chunk of whatever they put it into the fire and bring it out scrape out the impurities put it into the fire bring it out scrape out the impurities over and over again until when they bring out the gold the gold maker I don't know where he's called the refiner can see his reflection and the gold and that's when he knows it's prepared and I seize it I see God as that refiner and he's putting me into those things so that I can become a more christ-like and a better reflection of who he was and that's become 12 years ago my biggest dream was to tour and play shows with Linkin Park Korn Slipknot P OD I did it nothing there's nothing more I want to do now than be the man that God called me to be it doesn't matter if just maybe you're thinking well I want to do me I want to make success want to become a millionaire maybe a billionaire or whatever it is none of that stuff is going to bring any any happiness you can make millions I have friends you have friends we have friends are millionaires I've one friend that's a billionaire and that doesn't bring any happiness it's only what through a relationship with Jesus Christ and this is what Jesus said there's two things first of all one of what someone came up to Jesus and one of the disciples and said what does God want from me what does God want and Jesus says the only thing that God wants for you to do is to believe in his son so the only thing that God wants out of all of you guys here tonight is the belief in his son and then Jesus went and went on to say this in John 3:16 is the most famous verse in the Bible since God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son Jesus Christ that whosoever anybody from bum's the president's every color every religion whosoever believeth in him believe that he is the son of god that he died on the cross and raised on the third day will not perish will not die but have everlasting life everlasting life I don't know about you guys I don't want to die and we aren't even meant to die we're spiritual beings our body as he says will die oh it came from the earth and we'll go back to the earth but we are spirit beings and interesting enough the most the man worth the most money he's worth off he's worth 90 billion point nine I don't know Xero's are in there that's a lot zeroes 90 billion point nine he's the owner of Google and he just beat Bill Gates recently he just he just passed them so he said look he's the wealthiest man in the earth the whole planet and right now he just dumped 1 billion dollars alongside with PayPal CEO and Founder and Google and a couple other guys they they're dumping billions of dollars into looking to find eternal life interesting these are the billionaires I want to be a billionaire that'd be amazing I would love to be 90 billion point nine that would be epic right but here you have this guy that has everything by a your own islands and stuff he anything anything tear your fingertips his whole quest right now in life is he's looking for eternal life when way back 2000 years ago Jesus came on a rescue mission God sent His Son Jesus Christ on a rescue mission out of eternity to die for sinners like us because we were born sinners to die on the cross for the forgiveness of sins through the blood that was shed him dying as the sacrifice for the sins of the world that we are washed white as snow that anyone that believes in him because God only wants us to believe in his son that's the only work God wants us to do if we believe in His Son Jesus Christ then we will not perish but will you'll have everlasting life that means when we take our last breath here on earth we will enter heaven immediately you will literally close your eyes don't you think you'll see darkness which is boom you'll just be in heaven that's what the scriptures say that we are immediately caught up into heaven now whosoever believeth in him will not perish but have everlasting life and that is the key that's what this generation is looking for that's what the guy that's worth the most money for that's what people have been looking for since the beginning the time eternal life and Jesus 2000 years ago right God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son Jesus Christ that whosoever believeth in him will not perish will not die eternally but have ever in life and live forever when you think about icky just said life is but a vapor smoke we're here today gone tomorrow it's like a flower you see a flower you know I live by the beach so you have a fog that comes in you're like I'm getting fog a night and then you wake up in the morning it's gone that's that's life here they gone them all life moves quick and we have to live for eternity and it's not about religion religion is man reaching up to God but a relationship with Jesus Christ is God reaching down to man sending his son so there's nothing you have to do here I don't care what you're into I don't care what's going on in your life there's nothing you need to change God does the change it's not religion being this guy could sit here all day talk about how crazy Jesus and His disciples drove the religious people back then he drove them so crazy that they tried to crucify him it was God's will that he died for the cross died on the cross for the sins of the world but he went against the whole religious establishment because his whole goal they said they the religious leaders came to me said what's the most important Commandments and he said to love the Lord God with all your heart your mind and your soul and then love your neighbor as yourself love my neighbors myself is like you're all my neighbors I don't know you but we're all just love peace like love people and love God that's the cross love people love God and God wants to do something in your life tonight you're not here by coincidence are you kidding me this is a divine appointment this divine appointment for you guys started when Paul started talking to Austin that's how God works all things work together for good for those that love Christ according to his purpose God's in the details he's omniscient I mean he's outside of time that means if you watch a football game you see from the beginning to the end God's outside of time it's like if Yuri watched the game he knows what's going to happen the beginning the game to the end of them he's working all things together for good for those that love Christ according to his purpose he started working all these pieces moving things around and it all boiled down all these things that you heard all brought us to this moment in time right here right now isn't that amazing to think that everything the awesomes is going through and just all the people of all of us getting saved and all of our friends and all of us working together would bring us right here to this moment in history and you're here you're like part of the event you're in God's plan and now this is what God's saying to you he's like all I want you guys to do is believe in my son that I sent you and Jesus says any of you that thirst may come to me he says any of you that thirst for a relationship with God may come to me and then Jesus goes on to say any of you that believe in me may drink any of you that believe that he is a son of God you may have a relationship with me tonight and then he says in return he says when you thirst for a relation of God and you believe that I'm the son of God I will give you living water and then the original language it says torrents of living water and when you work look up that word torrents it means a violent raging abundant force of anything so have you guys ever seen a like I when a tsunami comes in or a huge flash flood and it rips out all the cars the houses the trees it killed everything it just destroys everything Jesus is saying if you believe in me then I'm son of God I'm going to send you torrents of living water I'm gonna send you torrents of the Holy Ghost fire and power from heaven God's Holy Spirit God's power from heaven to come into your life to baptize you to send His Holy Spirit inside of you and then that violent raging force of holy power to purge and destroy and start ripping out all that stuff that you don't like that you keep doing in your life and he's going to start transforming you and that fire of the Holy Spirit is exactly what he was talking about how the fire purges and it burns out all the black stuff in that goal that makes that gold such a beautiful thing and that's what God wants to do in your life he wants to send his holy power from heaven to start purging and destroying and ripping out all this stuff and making that beautiful vessel of gold that God can use for that purpose because there's vessels there's vessels that God will use where vessel and whatever we put into that Cup that vessel is what comes out we put sewage into its sewage comes out if I live in a life of Caleb's in of just things that we don't like to do but keep doing it all the stuff that drives us crazy then what comes out but if we start following God and we start going after him and go god what do you want to do in my life then he will start using he'll create us and mold us in that shape for whatever he wants to use and when you find out what you're used for that's when you know why you were created and that's where you're going to find that joy that's where you're gonna find that peace in your life that's when you're gonna get rid of your anxiety that's when you're gonna fall in love with the creative universe and guess what praying is talking to God and then he talks back if I told you right now if you could talk to the god of the universe and him to talk back to you how many people would say dude I'm down now that could happen now the other thing too is when when you believe in Jesus Christ and you ask him your life he will forgive you of every sin I don't know about you but I've had many sins and he will forgive us every sin and then he'll send His Holy Spirit and you'll start healing us internally and transforming our minds our souls and and just doing this work supernaturally in the natural realm there's nothing weird about it you just ask God to come in your life and he starts change you and you don't have to change a thing in your life you just need to come to him he never said when he said when something says what does God what well Jesus didn't say well you got to change your whole life and you got to believe in a son he didn't say that he said he said all he wants you to do is believe in his son and that's where it starts and then you get the Bible the Bible is the DNA of Jesus Christ you know what Jesus Christ is Jesus Christ is eternity eternal life that's what Jesus Christ is sin the DNA of sin is selfishness the DNA of Christ is holiness you see the contrast Jesus says I've come to give life abundantly eternal life and he says Satan has come to steal kill and destroy Satan's come to steal kill and destroy but God's come to give life abundantly and God so loved the world that He gave His only Son that whosoever believeth in him will never perish but will live forever and have eternal life and we all want to offer that to you guys tonight we want to offer that you we we did we we broke her eternal life we'd like to let people know about return of life about Jesus Christ so that they can be saved and they can live out the Great Commission what they were created for so I want to just ask you out loud if any of you want to have an encounter with the god of the universe because this is the other amazing thing when you pray and you ask God to come into your life he sends his Holy Spirit you're going to actually encounter God here tonight you're going to feel his presence you're going to feel like joy you're going to feel loved if that doesn't happen then God's not real but if you open your heart to him you say god I little you don't have to save with your mouth you're just like dude God if you're real prove it to me I want to accept you as my Lord you do that with your heart and we pray with you you're going to encounter him tonight and if you want to encounter him tonight before we walk out here I want to ask anyone that wants that we ask him into your heart encounter the god of the universe tonight maybe you walked away from God maybe you want to give your life to Him for the first time or maybe you don't know what you need but you need a touch from the God of the universe I want to ask you just to come up here and meet us and we want to pray for you right here in the front if you just stand up right now just come up here right now let me see you guys will stand with you guys are you yes purpose going keep coming I know there's more you know it gets a little it gets a little nervous you know nerve-wracking but just come up here [Applause] there's still people coming up so we're going to wait chaos you know I know that anxiety is a big thing with with with people and depression and you know sometimes you even here you know these disease voices it's all you know maybe you've opened yourself up through like Ouija boards and tarot cards and astrology and all that stuff you don't have to live like that you don't have to have those voices talking to you anymore you don't have to have those dark things showing up in your room which is the aman ik you could be set free of this stuff if you are dealing with any of that stuff depression anxiety that stuff do we're going to pray that God will set you free here tonight don't leave without being prayed for you could be set free because Jesus says whoever the Son of God sets free is free indeed you don't have to come you don't have to leave with what you came in leave it all here tonight we're going to wait I know there's still people coming up from the back so just cruise up here I want to make sure we pray with all of you guys that want the real thing if you want to encounter God you want the real thing come up what do you have to lose maybe you're with your friend and you don't want to go up alone dude grab them make them come with you how your mom or your dad to come up who cares bring them got parents - we all need Jesus you I done okay we're going to keep waiting for you guys Holy Spirit moving this place draw them draw those ones large to all those ones you want to set them free to night Lord you're in the business of it let's set them all free Lord so there's always people there that are that are sitting down and you know they're like there's like when I did this I remember the guy said hey man if you want Jesus in your life I was in a place in my life where I was messing around a lot of drugs and alcohol for 23 years broken relationships I went through abortions just a lot of chaos in my life just trying to fill that empty void and I remember when that that guy that was on the stage made that call I was like dude if you want Jesus come forward I ran down and literally I was so scared I was nervous I ran down but I'm gonna tell you right now from that point on my life was changed I was never the same because the gospel will change someone in the moment and I don't want this to be like an emotional thing it's not emotionalism this is like if you really want to encounter God come forward like nope no Bowl like if you want to encounter the God in the universe come forward and don't leave here without us praying for you and this is how the Holy Spirit works - he'll start tugging on your heart just your heart will start beating fast because he's drawing you he's drawing you when your heart starts beating fast that's when God is drawing you speaking - he's like dude come on let's do this so you got to answer that call he's not caught as if he's not tugging on your heart he's not calling you you'll know if he's calling you because your hearts beating and you're sitting in that seat and you're like your heart's beating fast that's the Holy Spirit calling you that's a clear sign of it happening [Applause] still people coming up guys up here in the front we're just going to wait for them we're going to wait until the last person comes up here don't worry so if you're there and you're like I'm going to go we're going to keep waiting for you to come just stand up and come down here through the thickest part the whole stick is part of about the whole thing tonight is right now when we pray in the holy gear the Holy Ghost comes down from heaven and he feels you up and you accept him as your Lord and Savior it's going to be this is like the highlight of the whole event is you get to meet Jesus Christ tonight it's amazing any last ones before we close right on [Applause] maybe you're dealing with your sexuality you're like God does it like because I'm gay or I'm transgender - God loves you God loves you so much you kidding me God loves you that's why Jesus came on a rescue mission to save us it doesn't matter if you're trying to find yourself by your sexual identity we got to find ourselves who we are in Christ we don't find ourselves and anything else anymore we find ourselves when we find ourselves who we are in Christ it's not who we're sleeping with it's not who we're getting some what bands we listen our identity is Christ and that's when you find out what you're created for so don't let any lies your hand say God doesn't love me or maybe you're like man I'm the worst of the worst sinners our photographer circa Footwear's right here on stage this guy he went on the road he traveled the world with me nine months out of the year and he knows I was probably the worst of the worst easily and if you are the worst of the worst God came to die for sinners he's looking for you the most he's hunting you down that's why he came you're never too far gone you could be forgiven for everything you're never too far gone God is a God of love he does not judge God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in him will not perish but have everlasting life God and then goes on to say God didn't come into the world to judge the world it says it says that God came in the world to save the world from ourselves and that's it last call before I pray anyone else right on dude all right [Applause] right we're gonna do it this is it anymore that's it we're gonna cut off Jesus ain't gonna do it no just you again anymore before we pray well last one okay all right cool we're going we're going to pray for you guys okay so now this is how it works okay because this is very important you got to pay attention to the details if we just give lip service like okay God you know forgive me for my sins like come on show up dude what's up it's not going to work it's the whole relationship with God it's a heart issue it's the way we position our hearts him because he knows he created us right so he knows our thoughts he knows what's going on in our hearts and if we're just here because when I come in like let's just do this but if you are serious as the heart attack you're like dude I want to encounter you God if you're real I want you to show up I want the Holy Ghost I want the whole thing I want the forgiveness of sins I want to feel your presence I want to encounter you tonight and you mean it with your heart you're guaranteed you're going to have an encounter with the God because with the God of the universe because that's the way it works but it's all with our heart issue it can't be lifts or that's that's that's posing it's been a poser - you're posing to do something it's about our heart issue so what we're going to do right now is we're just going to pray a prayer and we're going to ask there's no like special prayer to do I'm just going to say a prayer you guys just repeated after me but the content is asking God to forgive you for everything you've ever done and then asking them to baptize you with the Holy Spirit and then to just enable you to be who you were created to be and that's it and then God will send us Holy Spirit and you will fill you and this will be the beginning of your new walk with Jesus Christ and you want to get a Bible and you want to read the Bible because the Bible is the DNA of Jesus Christ and your life will start transforming as you read it even though it seems like a bunch of words you'll read it and you feed your spirit just like when you feed our body with with uh with you know food we're feeding our spirit because the word is the bread of life it's the bread it's the Word of God so we're going to go ahead and pray and just repeat this out loud everyone repeat the sell out and everyone out there you can repeat it out loud as well and we're just going to say it together out loud like you mean it say Jesus Jesus please forgive me Lord for all my sins I want to accept you as my Lord and my Savior fill me with your Holy Spirit baptize me with the fire and power teach me how to read speak to me show me how to follow you I want everything you have for me I want the real things in Jesus name I pray amen let me pray for you guys I want to bring the banner I want to sing one song right now I want to pray right now in the name of Jesus Lord I pray in the name of Jesus I pray for every single person that has come up here God we are not religious we want the real thing we are actually anti religion we want the Holy Spirit we want you Lord Jesus you came to the earth all you did is you loved on people you healed the blind you made the Deaf hear you made the ones that could not talk speak you cast the demons out of people you loved on people you went to the cross to die for the sins of the world you look out for the for the for the poor you didn't care about the rich you were just with the common folks Lord but your heart was full of love so lord I pray for every single person that's here that they will start living out that Great Commission God that they will read the Bible and they will be like you that we could follow who you are Lord and not what the church traditions are but just what we read in the Bible how you live your life Lord and even with the disciples it was this motley crew of guys they were just a common folks blue collar fish fishermen no big deal but they they had a passion for you God they followed you and they were men of mistakes but God all through the Bible the whole gospel the whole Bible is stories of people that followed you with their hearts that made tons of mistakes and that's what's so beautiful about the Bible it's a story of grace it's common people just like us making mistakes but following you with all of our heart and those are the people you're looking for that that I love that verse where it says 2nd chronicles 16:9 the eyes of the Lord range or they search the whole earth to strengthen whose arts are fully committed to them and here you are God right now in heaven looking through the whole earth looking for those who are fully committed to you not those ones that are perfect there's no perfect people but just people just like us that want the real thing and that are fully committed Lord so I asked that you will split the sky now and you will send your Holy Spirit that you will baptize them in the name of Jesus Christ that you will fill them God from their feet to their head I ask that you will overflow them that they will encounter the Living God your presence right now God that you will work supernaturally right here in this natural place that they won't encounter you God and I pray for those ones that are dealing with suicide that you will remove those thoughts in the name of Jesus how many stories have you heard of people that were dealing with suicidal thoughts that we're hearing voices and then we prayed for them and now they are not suicidal they're not hearing those voices anymore so we asked in the name of Jesus that you will remove that from any of those people that are in here that are deal with that we ask for people that are dealing with anxiety we ask that you remove the anxiety in the name of Jesus that your healing power will go out we pray in the name of Jesus people that are struggling with addiction anything from drugs to alcohol to prescription pills God that Lord that you will set them free of that that they will not have to be slaves to that anymore God you're in the business of transforming lives you transform my life you transform Austin and so many people that are in here we ask that you will set them free of that Lord we ask for people that are looking for that purpose Lord that you will show them why they were created that you will speak to them audibly even now Lord speak to them even those ones that have come in here with doubt god I pray that you will speak to them now and reveal yourself Lord Holy Spirit move in this place on these everyone that came up here God reveal yourself to them do what you do lord I pray that you'll let them feel loved right now God because you're a loving father and you've come to give us peace and rest from our so you even say all come to me all you that are weary and heavy-laden I've come to give peace and rest to your soul Lord give rest and peace two souls right now those ones that have come in here but heavy burdens are carrying this baggage from from life the cards they were dealt Lord just given peace let them encounter that reveal yourself to them and lord I pray for anyone here that maybe didn't even come up that is that is still struggling with the thoughts of like science and science is good it's all just lead back to who you are but maybe they've they got a different worldview I pray that you'll speak to those ones gone and just open up the blinders open their ears in their mind to who you are God that your loving father you love them and you want to show you what you want to be their God I pray that you will do that in your time and we thank you God for what you did and what you're doing now in this place what you're going to continue to do

Channel: Ryan Ries

Views: 140,172

Rating: 4.9196181 out of 5

Keywords: The Whosoevers, Ryan Ries, Calvary Chapel Golden Springs, Calvary Chapel, Austin Carlile, The Movement, Of Mice & Men, Music, Bible, Truth, The Word, Divorce, Marfan Syndrone, Tour, Health, Holy Spirit

Id: kgo5bA1f4Ws

Length: 98min 46sec (5926 seconds)

Published: Tue Aug 01 2017