American Dad - Stan’s Childhood (Compilation)

well it all started when stan was a little boy and his father left them is it my fault stan look at me kind of don't worry mama i'll take care of you i know you will that's my little man stan so from that moment on betty relied on stan for everything after my father left us my mother was devastated i was all she had and i did everything i could to keep her happy but then she started dating again and i knew these men would just break her heart like my father did so i did what any rational loving son would do when they took her out i took them out hmm [Music] are you and your dad close daddy will you read to me who the hell are you um yeah sure daddy will you teach me how to ride this bike i'm in a meeting [Music] i've kept this stupid bike all these years now it's a neglected rusty mess just like my relationship with my dad this bike is a perfect metaphor the streamers are my tears come on stan little did i know she was taking me to the happiest place on earth [Music] hey little guy i heard your dad walked out of here cause he didn't love you enough to stay but i know what'll make you feel better at that moment i was 100 sure i was going to be molested but it was even better forget about the menu tonight you can have whatever you want can i have a licorice burrito now you're talking that was a magical night i had chocolate covered hot dogs i had cherry pie pizza i had the third worst diarrhea of my young life we closed the place down that night it was the best dinner ever come back anytime i'll always be here for you stan so you weren't molested no that wasn't until four or five years later it was my first week at christian camp but i'm not ready to talk about father roy boy he had a set of paws on him what a summer oh you want me to confront father roy about what happened at camp thing is i'm not sure it was entirely his fault i may have deserved it in fact i may have instigated it actually francine i seduced him i don't know why i wanted him but i wanted him there was no actual stan after my dad left my mother had to raise me all on her own without a dad to guide me she was afraid i'd turn out too girly so she had very strict rules about what boys could play with i thought i told you to throw out that stupid doll but she's my best friend look at my foot it has been put down ah i was just a little kid the father-son picnic and as usual my dad jack was the only one who didn't show up i felt so alone but then then i wasn't after that i came back every day after school i know this sounds crazy but the tree raised me he taught me how to play catch he watched me grow he helped me start my first business even gave me my product turns out magnolia juice is as poisonous as it is delicious and no matter what he kept me safe his mighty roots connected me to something constant something i could depend on when so often life is cruel and unreliable he has been and always will be fair for me please don't kill my tree daddy here was 1988. now without computers and smartphones bad fathers watched porn in the living room i learned so much in school today get this the sun is a star enough with the questions can't you bore that pen pal i set you up with they hanged him on christmas nobody hated being a dad more than jack smith are you here to tuck me in get an imaginary friend to tuck you in it's quail time people stan felt like the loneliest boy in the whole world god will you send me an imaginary friend and that's when i fell into stan's life dad i did it i made an imaginary friend he fell from heaven jack realized his prayers have been answered too it never had to spend time with his son again from that day on he paid me to be stan's imaginary friend argh me thinks captain blackbeard's treasure be round here somewhere yar i'll watch some tv in case they hide treasure clues in the shows on which channel be donahue 41 42 what do you mean you skip town what about my money jack ready or not here i come i ain't hidden yet count to 3 000. okay 51 52. hey look they have the recorded memories of every c.i.a agent hmm let's mess with him he thinks his childhood was so much better than ours let's send him back there wait this is my childhood home what's happening oh the boys must have gotten into the control room stan stan is that you daddy hello son i love you wait that's not how grandpa talks he says i love you with a cup check i'll tell you why his memories are being put through a nostalgia filter he's seeing all of this through rose-colored glasses well let's take this down to zero and see how things really were i remember a time when we didn't need a nostalgia filter oh those were the days [Music] get out of here i'm busy go play in your tree house oh okay yeah i'll go play in my tree house treehouse oh yeah i remember that how is he liking this ah the old hood thanks boys this is great there's the factory the slaughterhouse and the river of clotted beef blood that came out of it where i used to race paper boats oh i'm where i discovered my first dead body oh there's my special guy there you are you remember this part i know your balloon dog had just popped and you were looking for your mommy like a mommy mommy my balloon you want the truth stan it's just beyond that door push push the door open [Music] that's right your mother was receiving a clown pound but what you don't know is that the clown was me when i was a boy i had a dog named freddy he was my best friend but right after my dad left us my mom said freddie was diagnosed with what is now known as air bud disease she told me the humane thing to do was to put freddie down no my mom said to please accept your fate with dignity turns out freddie wasn't even sick they just didn't allow dogs in our new apartment building and because of that super sad story i will never have a dog in my home it's such a sad story that i won't even undercut it with a joke i'm just gonna let it end sad son get a job dumbass that's right son we're garbage men now stop spying on me in my mirrors [Music] dad are you okay i'm better than okay i just had a good memory of my father a time when he was an honest hard-working garbage man um dad maybe we should return the truck and forget all about this garbage stuff that guy back there gave me an accordion what a great memory for you this is bringing a lot of memories back for me too thank you steve you've helped remind me that there was a good side to my father so next up chang's chop suey changs i love that place as a kid i used to play around with the waiters by imitating their thick chinese accents yep i was a real racist little you guys abandoned me you kicked me out of your camp oh stan there's no such thing as globetrotter cam what we had just played a show and as we were leaving we saw you waiting for your dad and usher told us he'd pounded a sprite burped the words time for some strange and jogged off into the night we offered to take you home but you didn't know where you live my dad said it was important i never know our address in case i was ever captured and tortured by people looking for him well that didn't sound like a great scene to us so we took you on the road and told you it was camp and you trotted around the globe with us on a bus up and down i-70 but four weeks later your dad showed up and we had to give you back except you didn't like that idea no i'm staying with you guys well you can because we don't want you around okay go on get out of here i'll say it get out of here [Music] so you just said that stuff to make me go back to my dad it was the hardest thing i've ever done we all missed you so much we even tried to adopt you but 12 black men asking for custody of a young white boy wasn't a slam dunk back then or even now probably you don't know how helpful you've been to me curly come back anytime stan that won't be necessary guess i can say goodbye to my separation anxiety because the globetrotters didn't abandon me my dad did which is way worse cause that ain't never going away oh god not that guy again

Channel: EdM240B

Views: 1,440,735

Keywords: American Dad!, American Dad Compilation, American Dad Try Not to Laugh, American Dad Stan Smith, American Dad Stan’s Childhood, AddictedtoAmericanDad, American Dad Henderson, American Dad Stan’s Dad, American Dad Jack

Id: JtFX6wW1Pqo

Length: 12min 18sec (738 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 26 2021