Alton Brown reviews Amazon's dumbest kitchen gadgets

greetings food lovers Alton Brown here reporting for the daily dot for years I have railed against the use manufacturer of what I call it unit askers in the kitchen that is devices that are basically created for one job and one job only you buy these items you use them and then they simply pile up until you have to tear down your house and build another one although I despise these devices what I found in my investigation is that truthfully America it's your fault we'll begin of course with this little device it's a strawberry slicer sure you could slice strawberries in this but I would argue that this is actually a training device that teaches children that they shouldn't reach for everything that's pretty look a gummy huh isn't it so pretty shouldn't reach in there go ahead go ahead let's move on to another device that has received many reviews online Baker's edge nonstick edge brownie pan why would anybody create something like this the average nine by nine pan simply does not create enough edge there is a problem of course you could blow 35 bucks or you could just pour your brownie batter into muffin pans which you already have well now how do you know that mark mark have you been in my kitchen because you think you know everything you think you know me mark you know me you know let's move on to one of my favorite tools on this list I speak of course of the iperfect kitchen meat handling and shredding claws this was a two-star review not very kind very sturdy but I'm just not sure what I bought these for before quill do the same job of fork I think deep down you do know why you bought these you can't do this with a fork these things are not meat shredders they are a lifestyle who doesn't want to be Wolverine I want to be Wolverine and you know darn well you want to be Wolverine - you know what you bought them for man up grow a set and use those things for everything this brings us to the veggetti or is it veggetti I'm not really comfortable saying either of those words but the truth is it's a combination of vegetable and spaghetti that just sounds wrong this whole device is basically meant to create noodles out of vegetables you stick it in there and give it a twist which looks amazingly painful sadly sadly this product broke upon first use one week later I found one of the tiny little blades in my salad nobody said anything about shredding salad in this thing did they it's meant to make noodles people not to make salad this ladies and gentlemen as you probably know is the Hamilton Beach - five four seven eight breakfast sandwich maker with timer I saw this on a Food Network program and thought it was brilliant tried it at home and hated it will be rejected to a college stood first off I don't understand why you would give something that's horrible to a college student they already have enough troubles with all those student loans what's more important is that the Food Network TV show you saw this on is called cutthroat kitchen it was given as a sabotage that means a bad thing and this is pretty much the worst thing that I've ever seen in my life I'm not here to defend it but here's okay you were stupid enough to just use it because you saw it on television fail I want to bring in the revolutionary Roly because it invents an entirely new category of food it's sweet spot eggs observe [Music] in a few moments a beautiful succulent - of egg will rise out of the Rolly come on really you can do it I know you can some things are worth waiting for [Music] you'll notice that the Rolly has a studded grip collar on the outside that's for safer handling it's happening yeah baby come on Roli oh you didn't even know you wanted something like that did you you know at breakfast with the family around the table oh because you people are staring at them quit look and it's hard to to do this when you're when you're not you know when you're you guys just it's not a friendly environment for for this kind of thing well now I have to say that there have been some negative reviews and I just want to read one that I think sums up the real hurtful things that are being said about rolling this one guy wrote it worked only one time and stopped forever never work again I think it is very sensitive well wouldn't you be you're expected to to perform like this in front of people over and over again at the breakfast table of course you're gonna be sensitive come on America don't be so stinkin judgey you know I'm not really that hungry you anyway Alton Brown for daily dot I hope you've learned something I know I have [Music]

Channel: The Daily Dot

Views: 8,043,667

Rating: 4.8240509 out of 5

Keywords: Alton Brown (Chef), Cooking (Interest), Amazon.com (Venture Funded Company), Funny, Daily Dot

Id: FgFeVlw2Ywg

Length: 5min 39sec (339 seconds)

Published: Thu Dec 10 2015

Reddit Comments

[u/aflowerinherhair]

Everything about the Rollie end result is just awful. Blurg.

[u/CaptainBayouBilly]

An electric butthole that poops out cooked eggs.

[u/darthbone]

There is nothing Alton Brown hates like unitaskers

[u/Lord_Kromdor]

The Rollie was unsettling.

[u/BardicPaladin]

I miss Alton Brown's Youtube videos. I'm sure he makes a lot more by working for Food Network, but I really loved what amounted to bite-sized Good Eats episodes.

[u/MjrJWPowell]

I want to be wolverine.

[u/JammieDodgers]

"Okay team, we need a new idea that will make us lots of money."

"How about we take one of those portable coffee mugs and make it shit out unappetising looking egg logs in the most unappetising way possible?"

"Damn it Jim, you're a genius."

[u/nicholmikey]

Anything with Alton Brown I will watch

[u/MrRomero]

I love AB as much as the next redditor, but my favorite Rollie review is still this one.