All In The Family | The Little Atheist | Season 6 Episode 11 Full Episode | The Norman Lear Effect

from television city in hollywood [Music] songs that made the hit parade guys [Music] [Music] those [Applause] yeah i made it did you kill that spider in the bathtub no but he's gonna walk funny the rest of his life baby face you've got the cutest little face look at that not a wrinkle on the guy nobody else can ever take your place so baby face no archie you ain't gonna wear your sweater to gloria's house what are you talking about why not well this is thanksgiving dinner you're gonna wear your best suit the turkey ain't gonna know the difference she when i get dressed oh yeah i'm dressed oh no you're gonna look i don't believe what's happening here what are you doing this is a new high in rome nice new dark blues what do you mean my dark blue suit i'm going over there to eat not to get buried please oh gee going over there getting dressed up just to eat with the daughter many's the time she yet with us wearing nothing but a diaper it won't hurt you to get dressed up once a year you're putting a tie around me too what do i need a tie for the only thing i ever see around the meathead's neck is a napkin oh gee this is the first thanksgiving dinner gloria ever cooked and it's very important all right important get out of here we'll get get the self-dressed oh yeah archie i can't decide between these two dresses which one do you think i should wear oh jeezy the whichever maybe i should wear my yellow and red dress yeah wear the yellow and red one eat it but i ain't got no shoes to go with the yellow i'd kill a yellow or red one if you i was hoping you'd pick the black and white one all right eat it going away you look like the back end of a zebra but where do you really like this dress yeah i really like that dress oh you ain't just saying that to make me feel good well i wouldn't say nothing to make you feel good but if you really like the red and yellow one oh wow i could wear my green shoes with it because green goes with red and yellow don't it yeah if you want to look like a traffic light help me decide don't ask me i don't know nothing about colors there ain't no business of mine what the hell do i look like an inferior decorator i'll wear the red and yellow one oh but what about my green shoes go barefoot in a bathing suit for all i can the whole thing is ridiculous getting dressed up to go over there who's going to see me crossing the alley a couple of cats it ain't easy for gloria to cook this dinner for us and the race month and all that running and shopping and everything and archie this is her first thanksgiving in her own home right all right i'm getting dressed up for you she looks so nice i just put the aqua velvet on don't go licking it at all you know what what i think i'll wear my green dress cause the green shoes go better with the green too much green makes people throw up oh i can't wear this it's all wrinkled i got a great idea for you to eat it put a raisin in your belly button and go as a cookie come on and then you fold the clams into the sour cream but if you like a lot of clams you can fold the clams the sour cream into the clams i don't know why i'm making this my dog buster doesn't even like clam dip and that's the truth [Applause] who is that the father of your baby hey george oh ah baby kicked yeah gee i wonder if i can hear him oh don't look edited what the hell is he doing listening to the baby what's the baby going to tell a magician wait am i going to see you doing something that gives me a lift [Music] wow this is a apple and this is pumpkin oh that's great hey the two of you looked terrific gee you didn't have to get all dressed up arch yes i did she forced me to look handsome daddy um all right here are you they come back to us bunker tomorrow candlestick because this is a very special occasion uh thanks mom i promise to take good care of them here honey everybody get out of my kitchen dinner [Music] yeah we're having buffet i thought we was having taiki hey why don't you try some of this clam dip no no no no i better stick the jam you got it come on all right let's try some on a cauliflower cauliflower ain't cooked he's a ghost wouldn't it be wonderful if the baby got here by christmas yeah hey i'd like to see him sooner hey maybe you could spring them early for good behavior huh daddy your cigars stinking up the house oh i can't wait to take it to the zoo and put her on the pony ride and maybe on sundays i could take her to church uh well you could take him to the park ma if the church uh no no instead of oh what do you mean a park cause the kid's gonna say prayers in the park to a water fountain why not as far as i'm concerned it makes as much sense as any other kind of prayers wait a minute wait a minute there just because you're an atheist you know don't mean that my grandchild's got to be gypped out of his religion that's right my children ought to go to church when they're little cause when they get older they're having too much fun to be religious ma we've decided to try not to influence our child and religion because well because we want to let him make up his own mind that's where you are 100 wrong old little girl the parents got to influence the kids as wines as when they're young got to teach them to learn the right thing see to be scared of god to love the dear old usa to defend american shores and all foreign countries is there anything else he should know sure there's a lot of other little things to use as dukes right to walk fast through the puerto rican neighborhood arch i think you're forgetting to teach him the most important thing yeah why to never listen to his grandfather why don't you go take a high dive into the clam drip no no little girl now let me let me hear you i can't give me that all right don't flush it out over here hey easy you're not how how far along you now eight months all right now how long you've been living over here in the colored house how long six months all right you proved my prince see the baby got started over there in our house that's a good god-fearing protestant house so that makes him a christian ipso fatso suppose a kid were created in a parking lot outside of mcdonald's what would that make him an ipso fatso hamburger in the parking lot you dirty guy hey as a matter of fact my baby was conceived in leo and miriam's bungalow and they're jewish so according to daddy we're gonna have to send him to hebrew school yeah that's a great idea lots of famous people turned jewish elizabeth taylor oh that damn would do anything to drive the world crazy sammy davis and he'd do anything for laughs you just do what i tell you little girl daddy it is up to michael and me and we've decided to let our own child make up his own mind about religion that's telling them fat lady thank you honey i better go base the turtle wait a minute oh no gloria i'll base the tape uh thanks listen listen i'm warning yous to you men your wives and one of these days you're gonna be chased around by a lot of little red devils with pitchforks who want to baste you what is all this about being afraid of god i was taught in sunday school that god loves everybody oh he does unless you rub him the wrong way [Music] you do that he sends down plagues at you like you've done with the mentioned egyptian kings the varios got one hell of a temper he could hit you with an earthquake or one of them famous floods yeah that flood wiped out a lot of innocent people and what about all those poor animals that were drowned hey but not the fish the fish was having a picnic they was eating catholics for a change just tell me one thing just one thing audrey is that what you want for our child to worship a god who you depict is cruel and merciless i want to tell you something buddy that you better keep a civilian tongue in your head because the lord can hear him and he knows what's going on every place every time use two guy to show some respect with him get away oh wait wait all right all right assuming there is a god which i am not assuming there is you say he is everywhere yes and he knows everything all right well then he would know what was in my heart he knows you don't believe in him no but if i did believe in a march he i believe in him because because he's a loving and forgiving god i won't forgive you for being an atheist buddy he would forgive me anything he wouldn't forgive you for showing him disrespect sure he would ah you'd even forgive me for doing that well if we're going for me no if we're gonna talk to him wow wow you better find a tailor who can measure you for a lightning rod buddy you know what you just said here she said it lord not me did you hear this you better watch your stepfather forgive you i eat it come out here and that's all my sweaty never seen a man so low and depaved that he would go to the lord but it doesn't make any difference if i believed in god i wouldn't go to god not again but i don't believe in him so i went to noble you've done it again i'm getting the hell out of here come on you're going home we ain't had dinner i ain't gonna have dinner i'm scared to eat in this house you know what that meat had just done he give the bronx cheer to the lord so and he's going to bring up our grandson to do the same thing commercial come with me and don't look back you'll be turned into a pillow of salt [Applause] yeah yes ma sure that sounds fair enough yeah would you please put daddy on the phone okay michael daddy admits he was wrong for running out of here and he'll come back over here if you'll apologize for giving god the raspberry gloria i didn't give god the raspberry you saw what i did michael please apologize gloria gloria please don't start that you know i can't handle tears i'm pregnant and i get upset easily and you know how hard i worked on that dinner why should i apologize to watch you when he's wrong gloria what kind of man would i be if i let your father tell us how to raise our children [Music] who would who would honor a man like that i wouldn't you wouldn't our child wouldn't [Applause] [Music] arch i apologize you happy yeah thank you see you in a minute daddy bye [Music] thank you very much gloria it's thanksgiving and you made me eat crowd try to get along with daddy how can i gloria the man's mind is a one-way street leading to a dead end just avoid arguments michael you're very bright you know the three subjects you should never discuss with him religion politics or anything else all right all right i'll try to do my best but i'm not promising anything honey i never told you about this wonderful trick that ma worked out with daddy now when they go out and he's losing his temper she just warns him by giving him a lovely little playful tug on his ear like that it's a wonder he doesn't look like dumbo it works so if i see that you're gonna lose control tonight i'll just tug on your ear and that'll mean i love you sweetheart but shut up here they are okay okay why do i get the feeling i'm gonna lose an ear tonight irene wow indian spin thanksgiving with pilgrims bring fire water whoa you look terrific how do you look what you friend yeah that's nice now we don't have to drink the cheap stuff i bought he's really shaping up so are you little mothers [Music] hi daddy give me back oh i mean you look beautiful oh she don't she look nice yeah when is she going to read the tea leaves was that a compliment george thanksgiving irene brought her some nice wine yeah i see that but to this house i could have wished you'd have brought some christian brothers no no no no religious offense [Applause] [Music] [Applause] intended gonna have a link anybody else want a leg no legs for me you can never tell where a boy's been walked candy some of them cranberry sauce little girl oh yeah daddy look i made it myself oh you got none of the real kind of slides out of the can i'll have it later with my ice cream there we go give me some more of this take you [Music] derrick here hey hey hey hey hi uh it's very funny it's human derrick hey don't forget everybody we got wine here let me pour the wine irene right where do we go now here irene why don't you sit over here come over here nice hi arch uh that's my place over there i'll take the plate over there where's the well yeah difference i always wanted to ask you how long do you use uh catley's got to count your beads to find out how many he's got the beads help us pray archie yeah what do you pray for bigots we've got a little shot sure it's thanksgiving let me help you down thank you one two three there we go all right everybody let's see [Applause] wait a minute wait a minute hey hey hey hey holy hell you're gonna eat nothing here without saying the grace place grace wait just a white from what there amazing what are you doing there ain't nothing wrong with saying grace dude anything particularly religious even an atheist can say grace it's just thanking uh mother nature whose first name happens to be grace grace nature you got it there buddy all right archie maybe we can skip grace tonight yeah we've been skipping it all year you never say it at home all right all right all right then the hell with grace wait a minute wait a minute wait a minute now all right even so i'm going to have a little quotation from the bible here don't worry little girl the lord will keep it hot for you now this is from my new testament you hear that new that means that everything in here is good today cut that out with my lucky bible here in the world war w two you see that dent there in the cover that's where it was hit by a hunk of crowd shrapnel i wouldn't be sitting here today if i hadn't been wearing that bible in my back pocket and that tells us where your religion is come up there now this little quotation fits certain people sitting at this table tonight romans 14 2-23 and he that doubteth is damned if he eats wow and the text for this evening service is let's all pray that our host mike stivett goes to hell you said that better than the bible do you know that hurts me how do you like that if i do that to you a little bit now here's the other quotes ace oh daddy come on this is thanksgiving dinner not a revival meeting what even so little girl my grandchild is laying over there inside of you with his little ears pressed to the walls dave and he is going to hear the word of god on thanksgiving whether that meathead likes it or not well i don't like it no no no no you can pull my ear till it falls off that's it i've had it this is my house it's going to be my child and no one is going to force his religious beliefs on his family oh sit down your chair and shut up yeah and that's another thing i've been waiting five years to tell you this get out of my chair i'm not gonna get out of your chair i'll get out of your house stay come on please well where am i supposed to sit now oh you would sit next to me your little sweetheart now there see i never sat at this end of the table my whole life stupidest thing i've ever seen a grown man hogging one chatroom we just don't want you forcing religion on us tonight listen nobody is forcing religion on you we're all just calmly trying to talk a little sense into this guy here wait wait a second wait a second we who is we all of us for god fear is here accepting you we don't agree that the child should be grown with no religion well why don't we just take a little vote on that i say that a parent has the right to raise his child any way he pleases and if we want to raise our child to believe whatever he wants to believe that's our business now who's with me on that nobody's with you everybody's ashamed of you who's with me on that let me see some hands do i see a hand going up there i can't believe [Applause] okay do whatever you want want to raise him in atheists go ahead raise him a loufern if you want raise him in norman with seven wives a holy ruler a seventh-day adventurer you want i don't give a damn cause i'm getting the hell out of here and i'm going out that way i wouldn't be seeing leaving the front door of this den of inquisitor no no ladies it's too late please don't worry oh gee that baby's gonna be all right cause he's gonna grow up with a lot of love oh no religion huh we don't know that mike just said they was gonna let him make up his own mind and whatever he decides he's still gonna be one of god's children archie it ain't in our hands yeah come to think of it why spoil our little girl's thanksgiving dinner not to mention my own what with this cause we'll be taking our little grandson to the parks of a sunday put him on a swing that'll be nice yeah only he ain't going on no swing no where will he go he will go to church no that would be cheating on mike and gloria i don't care we're going to raise that grandson of ours a christian if we got to break every commandment to do it okay okay you just can go back to enjoying your dinner now because here i am again don't matter with your meathead go ahead and eat there take your fork and eat don't worry about me you win buddy you win [Applause] all in the family was recorded on tape before a live audience [Music] you

Channel: The Norman Lear Effect

Views: 26,654

Rating: 4.8945055 out of 5

Keywords: The Norman Lear Effect, Norman Lear, Norman Lear Show, The Jeffersons, All In The Family, Maude, Good Times, Sanford and Son, One Day At A Time, Palmerstown USA, All In The Family Best Moments, All In The Family Season 6, Season 6, Meet The Bunkers, All In The Family Norman Lear, Archie Bunker, Edith Bunker, Gloria Bunker, Mike Stivic, Carrol O'Connor, Jean Stapleton, Sally Struthers, Rob Reiner, All In The Family Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving, Full Episode

Id: GC4wveHlirI

Length: 25min 52sec (1552 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 22 2021