ACT Now | Ralph Kellogg | TEDxOmaha

foreign I am one of 40 million Americans who have a diagnosed anxiety disorder and I'm one of six million Americans who have a diagnosed panic disorder now some may call my conditions and invisible disease some may call them a mental illness I simply call it life my life anxiety and panic have always been co-pilots in my life but the conditions became especially pronounced and the attacks increasingly prolific when I was outed for being gay when I was 35 years old at a former employer when I'm in the throes of an anxiety or panic attack it's on display for the world to see hmm my face flushes my heart races and I perspire so much I give new meaning to the term meltdown it's like I'm drowning on dry land I remember after getting my diagnosis how afraid I was and I was especially afraid of people at work finding out I was afraid of what they would think I was afraid of what they would say I was afraid of losing my job so I just stayed quiet what I've come to understand after working in the field of human resources for almost 20 years is that the number one obstacle to talking about mental health and mental well-being in the workplace is fear in the part of the employee like those I just described for myself and fear on the part of the employer entering into conversations that they may feel ill-equipped or uneducated to manage because once a manager or leader begins to have conversations about the mental health and mental well-being of their employees they either become part of the problem or part of the solution what I find amazing though is that these same leaders and managers who say I don't know how to talk to somebody about mental health or I'm nervous to talk to someone about Mental Health are the same people who will ask about the ulcer the cold the cancer treatment very intimate and personal questions about an individual's physical well-being without the slightest hesitation we spend a third of Our Lives engaged in work why can't we and why is it so hard to talk about Mental Health in 2020 I thought it would be a brilliant idea to switch jobs and not only switch jobs but switch Industries yes there was a pandemic and yes we were in the middle of lockdown but I figured hey let's throw caution to the wind and see what happens before I knew it I was entering interviewing with my now manager online meeting my team members online using Zoom and in the blink of an eye my dining room became my home office and the co-workers I saw on a daily basis were my husband Steve and our two dogs Daisy and Lily now Steve was great to work with but the dogs were terrible gossips shortly after I started working I got I started receiving calls and I got many inquiries from people asking me about what advice or suggestions did I have to help people navigate through the pandemic help people navigate through this new normal that we were encountering and I thought I don't know I don't have any advice or suggestions I thought people were getting through the pandemic the same way I was binge eating like I was starring in my own after school special shopping on Amazon and watching Tiger King I didn't have any advice but people were afraid and people were lonely and people were disconnected and as the pandemic wore on I became afraid and lonely and disconnected and my mental health issues collided head first with this new reality I wanted to find a way to help myself and maybe help others and so I created the ACT model act stands for acknowledgment compassionate accountability and transparency now there are some tools that I use when I work with clients on the ACT model a quick employee survey a scorecard that I will produce for leaders and managers but what I want to talk about in our time today is the foundation of the ACT model and how I believe it can help impact and improve an organization's culture so let's look at the first pillar of the model which is acknowledge acknowledge means that an organization openly and readily discusses employee well-being and mental health in the same way they do physical well-being it means that policies procedures handbooks orientation for new employees and ongoing discussions even between leaders and managers have open conversations related to one's mental well-being it also means that organizations do away with what I call codified language or code words that are often used to describe someone who might be struggling with their Mental Health we've all heard things like how are you doing is your problem better are you still feeling stressed usually these are euphemistic phrases to try and dig at are you still feeling blue are you still feeling down in the dumps I say suspend that kind of language call things what they are panic anxiety depression you see when you call Things by what they are you remove the stigma and shame associated with them with which is often what people like me feel when we see language written in coded terms when you give it a name you take it out of the dark and you allow people to be open and honest about what they're going through the second pillar is compassionate accountability compassionate accountability is a collaborative effort between the manager and the employee whereby they will work together to remove noise and obstacles and other distractions that might be preventing the employee from getting critical work completed during times of extreme emotional stress or when an employee is struggling with their emotional well-being and it looks something like this an employee goes into their manager and says I've got this great big project to do but I've got all of these other little ancillary things vying for my attention I can't get all of this done what do I do the manager and the employee sit down and collaborate on a solution and the manager looks to the employee to find out what's really important what really needs to be done and in what time frame can we reprioritize can we move deadlines down the road can we redistribute some of the work that's currently on your plate thereby allowing you the employee to free up and do what you do well the other piece of this is the accountability part so once priorities have been established the manager will then set up what I call Micro check-ins to ensure accountability this is where the manager and the employee will meet every day every other day for 10 or 20 minutes to ensure that the project or the work that needed to be completed is being done being done to specification being done on time being done in the way that the organization has outlined it also helps the employee for someone who is naturally anxious or who naturally struggles with anxiety micro check-ins can be a blessing micro check-ins can let you know that I'm on track that I'm doing good work that I'm meeting expectations that I don't have to wait until the very end to find out if this is what the manager or leader wanted it helps the dialogue and that collaborative process lets the employee know that I have someone here who's willing to Shepherd Me through what I'm going through at this moment and the last pillar's transparency when an employee discloses to you that they are struggling with their emotional or mental well-being don't shut the conversation down don't treat it as one and done if they have let you into a part of their life that is very intimate continue the conversation with some caveats don't give advice to the employee regardless of what you've gone through in your own life regardless of what struggles you may have had regardless of any mental health concerns that you may have dealt with your issues are not the same as the employees issues and giving them a bite-sized approach to what might fix their issue or trying to relate to them based on condition can serve to minimize their interaction with you and can shut down the conversation when I'm in my darkest times and I'm struggling with my own Mental Health and I encounter someone who wants to give me advice about what to do I want to scream at them I don't need you to fix me I need you to listen to me the other piece is don't should the employee you should go to the gym you should eat better you should get up and run every day you should take up yoga you should meditate great suggestions but when you put them in terms of shoulds what you're doing is send a messaging sending a message to the employee that their concerns are so minimal that they can easily be fixed by meditating or eating better or going to the gym recognize that in your need to help and provide Solutions might be having the exact opposite impact that you want in terms of helping the employee and finally for managers who tell me I don't know how to talk to people with with with issues related to mental health I'm scared I simply tell them it's very easy you simply say employee you shared with me that you were struggling with anxiety how are you doing with that and you know what it's okay if you don't want to talk to me right now I appreciate that but I want you to know that my door is open and I'm willing to listen whenever you want to have a conversation that's all you have to say that statement alone conveys compassion and a willingness to collaborate and oftentimes that's all an employee is looking for when they're struggling a recent article in the society for human resources management surveyed 300 companies that have a hundred or more employees and as part of the survey it asked what what priority are you placing on Mental Health within the workplace this year how important is it to you and to your organization 80 plus percent said yes this is a priority we recognize the impact we need to do something about it but less than 50 percent had any kind of plan in place to actually address it that's a problem that's a problem the great poet and author Maya Angelou once said that once we know better we do better We Know Better we can do better and the time to act is now thank you [Applause]

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 55,169

Keywords: Behavior, English, Health, Humanities, Leadership, Mental health, TEDxTalks, Workplace, [TEDxEID:49818]

Id: 2FmjhKjb-vE

Length: 15min 27sec (927 seconds)

Published: Thu Jan 26 2023