7 'polite' British insult idioms | Politely call someone a total idiot! (+ Free PDF & Quiz)

hello and welcome back to english with Lucy today I'm going to talk to you about seven idioms that you can use to politely tell somebody that they are an idiot so in simple terms idioms for describing stupidity we brits like to beat around the bush to avoid talking about something unpleasant or uncomfortable many of us live in constant fear of offending people however that does not mean that we won't throw in and under-the-table insult disguised as a seemingly harmless idiomatic phrase when we think that you're being a total buffoon so today I'm going to teach you seven ways to tell someone that they are a total idiot without seeming too offensive quickly before we get started this video is going to help your speaking your listening your reading and your writing it's going to help everything but if you're really really keen on improving your vocabulary listening and pronunciation even further I highly recommend audible they are offering you one free audio book and there is arguably nothing better than reading a book and listening to how the words are pronounced at the same time for your pronunciation and your listening skills I highly recommend listening to some British audiobooks click on the link in the description box to start your 30-day free trial and receive your free audiobook credit I've also put some recommendations for books with British readers right let's get on with this stupid lesson number one he's not the sharpest tool in the shed if somebody is not the sharpest tool in the shed they're a little bit stupid they're not the cleverest person it could have been said about me actually when I was invited on a YouTube trip to Berlin the other day we're in a lovely posh hotel and I noticed that my hairdryer wasn't working so I called up room service and I said they immediately came up and gave me a new one I plugged the new one in that one wasn't working either so I called up room service working and I am really really socking wet so they brought up a third one and at that point they realized that I hadn't put the key card in the door so none of the electricity was working including the light at night I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed number two she's one sandwich short of a picnic this means that somebody is not quite of full intelligence it could have been used to describe me actually when I invited a plumber over to fit in a dishwasher he texted me beforehand to ask for some photos and he asked me if there was a trap under my sink so it opened the sink and I look inside and to my amazement there is a mousetrap with a lovely bright logo saying the words the big cheese on it and I remember thinking to myself how did he know that but anyway I thought whatever took a picture sent it to the plumber and he just came back with like a million lock on paper and he said no Lucy the trap that I'm asking about is a type of pipe a water pipe can I have a picture of that please so yes I can sometimes be one sandwich short of a picnic also I think in America they might say one french fry short of a happy meal or one fry short of a happy meal that's mcdonald's reference if there are any Americans watching this please comment down below and confirm that to me number three means almost exactly the same as the previous one it is to not be a full ticket if somebody isn't a full ticket it means they're not clinically sane so be careful when using it make sure that you don't offend anyone it could have been used to describe me actually I think my mother thought that I wasn't the full ticket I'm one holiday at my grandparents holiday home in Portugal I walked through the mosquito nets on the door no less than three times and they had to put up special stickers for me which remain there to this day so there are special stickers for Lucy because she's not clever enough to just use a mosquito net properly so yes not the full ticket number four there's not much between the ears and if you say that there's not much between the ears that somebody hasn't got much of a brain this could have been said about me actually when I was forced to go to a week-long violin camp violin camp on day two I couldn't go on any longer I had to leave so I devised a plan I would gently maim or injure myself but how would I do it ah the bathroom door was particularly aggressive swinging both ways at a 180 degree angle I planned to gently catch my finger in that door exaggerate the pain so I was no longer able to play my violin and therefore be sent home as I got my finger ready near the door somebody else needed the loo and they came through and they injured my finger so badly that I had to go to hospital and to this day I have a messed up fingernail but like break it's just not right so yes not much in between the ears number 5 the light is on but nobody's home this means they look normal but really they're very stupid this could have been said about me actually when aged 9 and showing off in front of a group of younger children jumped off the top of a wooden castle in a playground got the back of my jumper stuck on one of the spikes and was left there dangling until one of those annoying little children ran to call my dad it was so embarrassing and so stupid the lights are on but nobody's home number 6 it's a saying someone's village is missing their idiot and this one comes from the term the village idiot which is used to describe someone known locally for their stupidity canapé used to describe me actually two days after passing my driving test I went into a nearby city to buy my beloved new shiny orange Mini Cooper and when I drove out of the dealership for the very first time after just 100 metres I stalled at around about put the gearstick into reverse and shut back at full force into the car behind me obliterating his license plate it was dreadful the police came I had to be escorted away but luckily my mother was two cars behind me because oh my god if she had been in that car behind me there would have been trouble so yes on that day the village was missing their idiot the idiot being me number seven the last idiom to describe a stupidity is as thick as a plank and if you are as thick as a plank you're really stupid it could've been used to describe me actually when on the school bus aged about 12 to 13 I found a mobile phone and I open the mobile phone and I found some very inappropriate images of the owner of the phone images and videos shall we say it was a man I've never seen anything like that before so I did what any school girl would do and I took the videos and I sent them directly from the phone to my best friend Felicity it was a hilarious joke I went into school and I acted like I knew nothing to felicitate she was really scared brilliant I thought my cheeky prank has worked she then told me that she'd gone to the headmistress of the school and the school had called the police and they were on their way in to interview everyone I knew what I had to do I ran in my little tartan kilt to the headmistress and said no it was me I then had to spend the rest of the day with the police explaining what I'd done why I'd done it and having them explained to me why it was so awful all the while I was begging them not to tell my parents and in the end they didn't which I really appreciated and I actually told my parents about it on my 21st birthday dinner that yeah I thought it was gonna be hilarious but the police just didn't have any sort of sense of humor right that's it for today's lesson I hope you enjoyed it I hope you learned something please if you now doubt my intelligence you can unsubscribe but you really are welcome to I would and I invite you to comment below with any embarrassing situations that have happened to you or any other idioms that you know of that means stupid in English you can also let me know about idioms in your own language and translate them into English because some of them are so funny I mean a sandwich short of a picnic that is that particularly tickles me don't forget to check out audible.com the link is in the description box and you can connect with me on all of my social media I've got my facebook I've got my Instagram and I've got my Twitter and I will see you soon for another Essen yeah today it is very hot very very hot I'm dying oh my god are in a lovely posh hotel and I called up Aroon sir rune why am i saying rune runescape are in a lovely posh hotel and I called up runescape no okay no special stickers for Lucy because she say hello to the English Lucy you

Channel: English with Lucy

Views: 1,902,690

Keywords: idioms for stupidity, describe stupidity, english with lucy, english with lucy story time, story time, embarrassing moments, embarrassing stories, embarrassing story, blonde moments, one sandwich short of a picnic, not the full ticket, the lights are on but no one's home, very british insults

Id: jSHzYkV9Kqw

Length: 10min 28sec (628 seconds)

Published: Thu Sep 20 2018