5 Signs You're Not Ready To Date (Or Be In A Relationship)

hi everyone welcome back to my channel if you're new here I'm Courtney Ryan and in this video we're going to be talking about five signs that you're not ready to date or to be in a relationship no you don't need to be a fully healed or perfect specimen in order to date so let's start by debunking that however there are some signs that you might not be quite ready to date or to be in a relationship for a variety of different reasons so here are five of them so some signs that you might not be ready for a relationship or to date in general might include number one you are bitter or angry sadly I see this a lot online from both men and women and yes I'm looking at you all men are trash or all women are the worst type of people out there I see you in my comments I see you on other channels I see you a lot now let me ask you this question why on Earth would I want to date a man who thought that women were the worst I wouldn't I would never because that is a sign to me that you were not ready for dating or a healthy relationship emphasis on healthy the same way that none of you guys want to date a woman who goes online or goes around saying all men are trash where I hate all men or generalizes men to any degree no thank you someone who is bitter and angry is not ready to date because their negative attitudes and emotions can impact their ability to form healthy and fulfilling relationships bitterness and anger towards men or women can stem from a variety of different reasons maybe it's a past experience you had with someone that you dated or personal issues from your upbringing this can lead to a lack of trust a lack of communication and emotional intimacy when you are dating or in an actual relationship in order to be ready to date it's important for you to work through your negative feelings and develop a healthy respectful attitude towards the opposite sex or a potential partner this might involve things like therapy self-reflection personal growth But ultimately here it's essential to approach dating and relationships with an open mindset a positive attitude in order to form a healthy and fulfilling relationship and maybe you need a little bit of outside help in order to work on these parts of yourself and that's okay too before we get into the next Point big thank you to betterhelp for sponsoring this video betterhelp is the world's largest therapy service and it's 100 online with better help you can tap into a network of over 25 000 license and experienced therapists who can help you with a wide range of issues to get started you just answer a few questions about your needs and preferences in therapy that way better help can match you with the right therapist from their Network then you can talk to your therapist however you feel most comfortable whether it's via text chat phone or video call you can message your therapist at any time and schedule live sessions when it's convenient for you if your therapist isn't the right fit for any reason you can switch to a new therapist at no additional charge with better help you get the same professionalism and quality you expect from an in-office therapy be but with a therapist who was custom picked for you more scheduling flexibility and at a more affordable price get 10 off your first month at betterhelp.com Courtney Ryan that's better h-e-l-p.com slash Courtney Ryan and I've also linked them Below in the description my next sign that you are not ready to date is that you're not fully over someone else for obvious reasons here if you are still healing from a breakup or nowadays getting over a situationship that never even turned into a relationship you probably aren't ready to jump into something new quite yet unless you want them to be a rebound ouch one of the biggest mistakes that I see people make is jumping from one person to the next it's okay to take some time to yourself and let yourself heal from the situation that you were just in evaluate it and really be thoughtful about what went well and what didn't take accountability for the role that you played both positive and negative and learn from that this is how we grow and ultimately how we can be an even better partner in the future for the next person that we date and I've often found that people who don't take this time to really you know take a look at what went wrong evaluate and reflect they end up dating another person and it's like the same relationship with a new face in front of them and the same issues and patterns just continue to repeat so I think it's really important to take this time to be single to again evaluate where you could grow where you could improve what went wrong what went well in the last relationship so that you can carry that into the next one and know and learn from your past experiences my next sign is that you're emotionally unavailable or immature I actually just made a video about signs that someone is emotionally unavailable so check that out too if you want to see the dedicated video about being emotionally unavailable but long story short here someone who is emotionally unavailable is not ready for a relationship or dating because they're not capable of forming deep emotional connections with others emotional unavailability can show itself in many different ways like being in emotionally distant avoiding intimacy altogether or just being unable to express their feelings these behaviors can make it difficult if not nearly impossible to form a healthy and fulfilling relationship with someone else and the matter of the fact is that emotional availability is crucial for building trust intimacy and a strong connection with your significant other when one person in the relationship is emotionally unavailable it's going to create an imbalance that can then lead to feelings of frustration loneliness dissatisfaction resentment a lot of not so great things so ultimately here to wrap this one up if someone's not emotionally available they're not ready for dating or a relationship and might need to spend a little bit of time working on themselves before pursuing a romantic connection and that's okay we all have work to do it's okay and you can continue this as you date or enter a romantic relationship my next sign is that you don't want to put in the work or the effort and the reality here is that dating requires work and effort on on your end no matter what the relationship is no matter who it's with it's going to require work effort and energy on your part if you're not at a place where you're willing to put in effort planning dates spending adequate time with someone to get to know them paying for the day of course this can vary obviously I'm not trying to you know paint a black and white picture here this is going to be different depending on the relationship but just generally speaking contributing to the conversation in a meaningful way I mean I could go on and on the list continues here if you aren't willing to do those things then you probably aren't in a place where you're ready to date and that's because a successful and healthy relationship requires effort and work from both people involved if one person is not willing to put in the effort it can then create an imbalance and cause a lot of issues a relationship that is one-sided is not successful or healthy and often leads to resentment down the line and I do think it's really important to be honest with yourself about your willingness and ability to commit to the effort required for dating and for a healthy fulfilling relationship to work out long term I I see a lot of people in my comments say things like I don't want to spend time dating I don't want to make time for it you know I don't want to go on a bunch of dates I don't want to pay for the dates I don't want to put effort into my appearance or show up as the best version of myself in order to make a good first impression there are a lot of people who are unwilling to put in the work and do these things and in that case you're not ready to take that next step because I think it really does start with you and you should want to put an effort you should want to put your best foot forward I think anything in life worth having requires some level of effort and work on your end and if you're not in a place or mindset where you feel that way too then that tells me you have some work to do and I don't say that to hurt your feelings I say that as a kind of hard truth reality check and my last sign is that you're not willing to compromise every single relationship requires a level of compromise flexibility and settling I know people hear the word settling and freak out a little bit but it's not necessarily a bad thing and you might be thinking why well because nobody is perfect there is no perfect person out there for you and in terms of Simply dating maybe you have unrealistic expectations for the person you want to be with about things that don't really matter maybe you're being overly picky and have a list of icks the way someone scoots into a booth or takes a photo things that don't matter my friends maybe you function as a my way or the highway type of person and think that the world revolves around you and in all of these cases that I just mentioned I'd say you've got some work to do because you have to be willing to compromise on some things in order to cultivate a healthy relationship and I know our society has painted a picture of never settle or don't make any compromises because with the right person you won't have to and I'm sorry but that's just a bunch of baloney this is not a Disney movie this is not a rom-com on the Hallmark Channel this is real life there are of course some things that you should never settle for but I can promise you that the amount of money someone makes how tall they are or how big their butt is is not on the list so sorry my friend and I actually did a video recently about things that you should never settle for in a relationship so I'll link that down below if you're confused about what you should accept what you shouldn't accept of course this is going to come down to you on an individual level and really thinking about your values your morals your life goals and things like that I always recommend making sure that you're aligned with those things on the person that you're going to be with but again the video that I made could be helpful if you don't know where to start but again here compromise is an essential component of any healthy relationship it involves both parties being willing to give and take and find mutually agreeable solutions to conflicts or differences all things that are very important if you want a relationship to flourish and grow long term so guys that is all I have for signs that you're not ready to date or to be in a relationship I hope that you found this video helpful let me know down below if you resonated with any of these points maybe the person that you're dating or people you're talking to kind of fall into the categories that I talked about here today again something to keep in mind is that none of us are perfect we are all a work in progress and when you actually do start dating or getting into a relationship I think it's important to still actively work on these aspects of yourself to make sure that you are being the best you can be for the person that you're with and also for yourself these are all things that are going to make you a better you but also a better romantic partner for that special someone that you choose to grow with so if you like this video or found it helpful be sure to give it a thumbs up and subscribe to my channel to be in the loop for when I release new content if you haven't already be sure to follow me over on Instagram at Courtney Christine Ryan I love connecting with all of you guys over on there as well as always thank you all so much for watching and I will see you all next time thank you

Channel: Courtney Ryan

Views: 91,124

Keywords: Courtney Ryan, Dating tips for men, Dating advice, Modern dating, Modern women, Emotionally immature, Emotionally unavailable, Immature women, Signs a woman is immature, Red flags, Red flags in women, Dating red flags, Don’t date these women, High value man, High value woman, Immature, Relationship, Run from these women, emotionally unavailable women, signs of emotional unavailability, emotionally unavailable men, signs you're not ready to date, not ready for a relationship

Id: hR3NlBXQkJ0

Length: 10min 38sec (638 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 11 2023