5 Min Crafts: Giant Sandwich

oh wow wow Cheers all right welcome back to another crafts video now I know what you're thinking why are you at your desk you can't do crafts at your desk you [ __ ] loser yes you're right but I wanted to sit here and and describe to you my inspiration behind this episode of crafts if you subscribe to my second channel Cody & Co and then you've probably seen I've been doing some music videos on there and and for one of the most recent ones I made a song about grilled cheese and in the video I made a grilled [ __ ] cheese and it rocked my world I made it by myself I didn't even look at a recipe turns out it's not that hard it's just bread and cheese but but it got my you know my creative DIY craft juices flown again and I thought and I thought god damn it if it's not the time for another crafts I think it is I got a little DIY boner going on and I'm ready to splooge but alas what should we make is what I thought so I popped onto our favorite Channel five minute crafts so just to check out what's going on on that page just to see what kind of DIYs they been throwing down these days and this is what I found I found 28 brilliant body tricks to look flawless in no time and then we got a picture here of someone's flat ass and then afterwards it looks like they got a whole bunch of cake here so I looked at that I said no thanks my ass is already flawless thank you very much move on looked at another thumbnail here we go twenty crazy ideas to impress your friends there's a thumbnail here I don't know you know I'm not really into the idea of putting Elmer's glue on your face to make it look like you have acne because my skin is also flawless and I'd like to keep it that way thank you very much oh gee let's pop on a five minute crafts for men see what's going down in the boys only section thirty ways to turn your mess in clean space what kind of a craft is that [ __ ] I can't imagine a more boring video than me cleaning my apartment plus just like the other things my apartment is already spotless thank you very much okay let's keep this one 35 plus hidden body tricks that can simplify everything okay [Music] oh cool stretching cool that's an awesome craft that's awesome stretching cool let's try it [ __ ] it let's do it ah awesome thanks for watching guys no I'm kidding but these crafts do suck major ass so what do we do what do we do that's what I was stuck thinking what the heck should I do it's like I'm all dressed up ready to craft and I got nowhere to go and then I remember wait a tick I saw on the Instagram Explorer page the other day this smiley chef that you you've probably seen this guy before he's [ __ ] super popular he's got 14 million followers 14 million he's a chef and he makes these videos where he does these crazy giant meals and he smiles directly at the camera the whole time while he's cooking like a complete psychopath and it's [ __ ] awesome in this one he's making a giant butt hole shaped pastry here more commonly known as a doughnut look at that smile dude his face does not change there there not a single muscle twitch nothing he keeps that exact smile through the whole thing whoa my mouth is getting wet [Music] oh my God look at that beautiful he just made the best food in the world even better somehow the only way I can think how you'd make Donuts better than they already are is by making them way bigger and then putting smaller Donuts on top that's the only way you can make Donuts better and he just [ __ ] did that all while sporting a beautiful smile look at that smile it warms with my heart it really does all right let's check out another one here here we go oh my god oh my god the way he just slapped that turkey carcass on the [ __ ] table I was [ __ ] disgusting limbs flailing okay now his smile is starting to creep me out a little bit so she was handling these [ __ ] raw giant animal bodies kind of look like a serial killer did anyways yeah look at that Thanksgiving feast you just whipped up like it was nothing that makes me hungry honestly it makes me hungry for a hug from this man because I feel like he's probably the most supportive comforting person in the entire world either that or he could kill you and your whole family and never feel a thing who knows anyways how is this all relevant to crafts well my dear sous chefs these are crafts they are aren't they they're edible crafts and my sandwich juices are flowing from my second channel video so I thought today let's try to follow this other video he did where he makes a ginormous sandwich you know he makes it he makes a big sandwich for a big dude you know someone like your girlfriend's other boyfriend no seriously I pulled up this video and I was watching I was like I could do that that doesn't seem that hard why don't we take a look at it first onions que a metric fuckload of butter random spices oh my God look at the way he rubs that meat that's a loaf dude that is a loaf cheese french fries tomatoes meat pickles and onions that's it that's all that's all my grocery list is so let's go cop some supplies let's make a giant sandwich can I get a yes chef one two three if you really did that you're a loser now I'm just mucking around all right let's uh let's do it I'm ready I'm equipped with this $15 gift card to Trader Joe's that I got for Christmas this year Thank You uncle Steve appreciate you I will see you guys there let's do it okay we're back I have the ingredients I blew a [ __ ] bag at Trader Joe's and I got all this [ __ ] actually it only turned out to be $85 which I feel like is weirdly cheap for this I feel like I should have been a little bit more expensive so hopefully it doesn't turn out to be just like a medium-sized sandwich but who knows I'm a medium-sized ooh so that would work for me so yeah well we're gonna go through the ingredients first and then we're gonna make this goddamn hoagie can I get a yes chef yes loser all right let's do it first things first though is you know it's not a craft video if we don't catch a healthy buzz before we do something and I haven't eaten yet in anticipation of this sandwich I'm really excited and so this is gonna hit me and we all know that pineapple goes really well with meat it actually does I said that as a joke but it actually really does because those two things are delicious together and I have some some tri-tip or something that I got so this is perfect yeah we're just gonna go ahead everyone you know truly sell - everyone loves these young this would be oh my god this frame is perfect for an ad Wow YUM my bully seltzer okay I'm gonna censor that because they don't sponsor this and so that's the oven just finished preheating and so I'll show you what I got Oh what's up sorry the breads calling for lips of sourdough bread they didn't have a giant roll obviously cuz traitor just doesn't sell that and I knew that so I figure we'll get four separate loafs here and we'll kind of combine them into a mega loaf of bread mega loaf that's a great band name two boneless beep boneless beep not a boneless beep two boneless beef tri-tip roasts right here give it a little meat slap that and then we'll give this one a little meat slap right there Wow so we got to try tip roast right here baby slapped and ready to go they're already spiced I didn't want to get any spices myself because I don't really know what I'm doing when it comes to spices oh god I'm already feeling this I'm [ __ ] blacked out french fries a whole bunch of tomatoes I dropped one of these on the floor of the grocery store and it's one of the guys said hey sir he dropped an apple and I grabbed it I was like you mean it tomato and he was like I yeah the apples cousin no he was like a 20 it's like a 22 year old kid he said that like I [ __ ] respect that joke good bunch of onions in here sharp cheddar 's what do you think is the best time cheese Swiss cheese you like Swiss cheese that's your favorite temper tease Swiss cheese is the one with the holes in it right it's like you're not even getting the full piece of cheese you're getting cheese in half errors all right we're gonna open these meats let's open these meats let's open these meats let's open these meats here it is right here hey check this out this is me and you can even you can even help give it a little slap you can leave a healthy chunk of meat right there as a walking damn look at that now I think then the first thing he does is he chops all the onions here's the thing with onions is that normally when you cut them I'm sure you cry right that's what happens to you people who are weak me I don't cry a single tear I can hold this right here oh boo nothing look at dry as a desert because I'm because I have nerves of steel and I'm void of all emotions that aren't what suppose I have contacts so do you wait so he did like a cool little trick at the beginning where he like took the onion it up and do his hands like that I have to do that all over my computer onion thyme onion thyme woo chop these babies up I hate doing this so much I hate this is why I don't cook chopping vegetables is just like the bane of my existence almost boring thing on the planet [Music] okay so this is what I found I found garlic powder curry powder which we're gonna throw on there why not and then onion salt cuz how funny is that putting onion salt on onions that's hysterically redundant there's a little dog food in there too all right so the meats cooking the onions are cooking while that's happening I'm gonna cut the apples okay that sucked ass unfortunately we're gonna have to drink another truly yeah it's pretty good all right boys the meats done cutting it up right now god damn it it's beautiful look at this I'm actually vegan but for this video I'm not vegan but normally I swear I am vegan I'm as vegan as it gets I won't even touch this stuff gross this is really grossing me out right now ooh looks awful so [ __ ] gross I was hungry until I saw all this meat and then I was like lost my appetite are you [ __ ] animals the meat is cooked the fries are cooked the onions are cooked the cheese is opened the meat is cut the tomatoes are sliced the buzz is caught can I get a yes chef yes loser so now the sandwiches need to be prepared and so this is the whole thing I was gonna like make the sandwiches together and all that [ __ ] but I'm too [ __ ] hungry okay I'm a little bit drunk now and all I want to do is eat these goddamn things and so I'm not even gonna cook the sandwiches I'm gonna just put the [ __ ] on the sandwich and then just eat it as a normal sandwich so this was basically just a video of me making a normal-sized sandwich this is like the worst epic meal time of all time anyways I think Perry Perry's the move by the way I know this looks like a hyena got ahold of you know like a warthog or something like that and sorry for all the vegans out there me included I don't like looking at this first step little para nay jeez now keep in mind these do have curry sauce on them alright give that a little onion slap perfect Wow this actually looks really good all right last step by the way sorry for chilly packing we haven't fed him at all today I'm kidding oh I forgot the tomatoes you want tomatoes on yours all right whoa I think it's ready I think did I forget anything about the onions we have the para neighs you have the steaks steak bro some vegan we got the tomatoes we got the French fries onions all that's left is for me to catch a little bit more buzz there that's Kelsey's look it actually looks really good I think this is actually gonna be like a fantastic sandwich chili we haven't let him drink water all day [Music] [Music] I appreciate you if she tries at home I highly recommend it thank you through the smiley shot I know I didn't smile much during this but I was very happy and this is making me extremely happy yeah no we ate a sandwich we caught him nice buzz wow you're really going in thank you all right cool back to you thanks for watching this edition of crafts you guys I hope you enjoyed it um listen if you want to get one of these mugs let's say [ __ ] off on them that's a company that my friends and I started called mean mugs and you can get one of them at mean mugs dot online we got the Valentine's Day collection up right now there's a lot of really funny things for your significant other stuff like number one at sex number one kisser solid girlfriend solid boyfriend not a virgin I'm definitely buying that one because I'm not yeah it's a fun little company my friends and I started so if you want if you want a comp one of those mean mugs dot online is the domain appreciate you and then you can get my personal merch at Co - official calm and look up for some new stuff coming soon appreciate you guys check out the song that Noel and I released called broke [ __ ] that's on Spotify everywhere the videos that you [ __ ] seen it probably alright stay crafting like sous-chefs peace [Music]

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Views: 3,927,119

Rating: 4.9517083 out of 5

Keywords: smile, czn, chef, cooking, Cody ko, cody, ko, instagram, comedy, sketch, dms, cringe, vine, advice, vlog, comments, codyko, comedian, vines, podcast, funny, tiny meat gang, insanely chill, 6secondauditions, the weekend edition

Id: QBUDst1WQj4

Length: 17min 56sec (1076 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 03 2020