3 Easy Questions to Quickly Turn Strangers into Friends

[Music] hey guys Caesar here making new friends or transitioning a group of unrelated relationships into a community can often feel like a challenge or feels really uncomfortable however people are all the same and they desire growing connections within any circle of acquaintances I want to show you how you can easily help facilitate this okay I've used these three questions many times to break the ice and sort of kill the awkwardness of things they lead to great conversations a lot of laughs and a pretty quick bond between everyone that's present my wife te and I can always fill a room with food and fun and we like to transition casual conversation towards these three questions by saying something like this hey excuse me this is so awesome uh please help yourself to anything you want more food or drinks or whatever you like we really want you to feel like family when you're here with us you know what and we thought it would be fun to try something we've got these three questions that are super simple to answer and but it you know it'll help us to get to know each other a little better what do you say okay so here's the first question that's how we start now you may be thinking well some people won't want to participate maybe they'll be too shy but I have found that everyone's favorite thing to talk about is wait for it themselves trust me on this okay go for it that people love it then we ask these questions one at a time and we go around the room and we have everyone answer before moving to the next question you'll be amazed at how much you can learn about someone so quickly and the connections that people will make you know in each other's lives always surprise me okay question number one where were you born okay simple enough everyone was born somewhere so they all can answer it and you will immediately find the It's a small world syndrome starting to crop up people be like wow my dad's from there or that's crazy I went to college in that town did you ever go to that old ice cream parlor on Fifth Avenue okay so simple so cool now after everyone's had a chance to answer hey don't rush this then move on to the second question it's important not to make this feel like a speed quiz right you're trying to build dialogue and connection question number two what is your favorite childhood memory this one's usually pretty heartwarming I found that a lot of people will share similar memories about a vacation they took as kids or a special time with a parent or grandparent okay again immediate connections and when you hear these things you start to have a much deeper insight into someone else and this makes it easier a lot easier I think to bear with one another in any kind of community or group begin to understand them a little bit now if someone says something like well I really have no favorite childhood memories my family was pretty rough then you know I've heard that right listen and then don't make them feel awkward acknowledge what they've said right and then thank them for sharing that and you may want to ask like a follow-up question about something they did one time as a kid that was really fun so maybe it's not a favorite memory but you know just so they can answer right now after everyone has answered that question and had enough time to sort of ask each other questions then go ahead and move to the third question question number three is what is the worst job you ever had and and the answers to this one are usually hilarious I love this question and and when added to what someone's previously Shar I start to feel like I know them a lot better now here's a tip if you're in a younger circle of folks who've not had a lot of formal jobs in life yet well then you might just shift the question or tweak it a little bit for them to the worst chore at home that they ever had to do or hated and why okay and I again I like to ask simple follow-up questions to help dig a little deeper and find that others kind of Follow my lead in this and pretty soon there's just a good communication going on it's more fun okay by the way these same three questions work great with a group of closer friends or a staff too you may be surprised at how much you'll learn about people you thought you knew pretty well now you know of the three questions I use to pull down barriers the next best time to break the ice and start moving a circle of acquaintances toward a tighter knit group of friends is now you'll be glad you did and others will thank you for it hey before you go be sure to get my three easy questions cheat sheet just click the link here I'm I'll send it to you and I'll even I'll give you my own answers to the three questions they're fun as always thanks for [Music] [Music] watching

Channel: Everyday Disciple

Views: 76,191

Keywords: Missional, missional living, gospel, gospel fluency, faith, family, Christianity, food, spirituality, Hugh Halter, Francis Chan (Author), Jefferson Bethke, Rob Bell (Author), Caesar Kalinowski, Jeff Vanderstelt, ministry, missional communities, community, church, jesus, love, religion, bible, christian, grace, mercy, god, spirit, Verge, missional church, evangelism, prayer, discipleship, discipleship training, making friends, How to make friends

Id: 4tLZ6csnwA4

Length: 4min 54sec (294 seconds)

Published: Sun Oct 30 2016