15 Reasons Why Your Relationship Sucks

hello elixers are you one of those couples that can never go to a wedding without a huge blowout or does asking your partner to pass the remote always lead to an argument if you're finding ways to spend as much time apart as you can and waiting until they're asleep before you climb into bed there's no denying your relationship sucks if you landed on this video because you're in denial or you truly don't know why your relationship sucks we're here to bring you the truth alexers and remember we're not a substitute for the help of a medical professional so if you're in mental distress about your relationship please seek professional help from a licensed practitioner welcome to alex.com the place where future billionaires come to get inspired if you're not subscribed yet you're missing out number one you're trying to control everything if your suggestions are more like instructions and you seem to always have a better recommendation from what to eat to how to fold the laundry you might be too controlling if you have no idea what we're talking about because your way is the right way then you really need to listen up if you're dating an adult it isn't going to fly for you to try and control their every thought and move at some stage they will tire of being bossed around and retaliate and you'll be left alone it's time to pick your battles what's worse having no help in the kitchen or having them do the dishes and put them away in the wrong place try to focus on appreciating what they do get done instead of what they don't do according to your standards hand over the reins of decision making and you might be surprised at how much you enjoy being free from taking charge all the time keep reminding yourself that what you lose in control you will gain in partnership number two there's no intimacy if your relationship used to have a lot of netflix and chill but now it's just a lot of netflix and not so much chill your relationship might be lacking in the intimacy department it's easy to start to lose your libido as you start to get comfortable around each other and makeup is traded for tracksuits but this is the reason it's important to keep fanning the flames of your sex life add some excitement by making sure you still dress up for each other see each other outside of the house and make a little eye contact across the table from time to time it's so easy to lose that lust when you're always sitting next to someone instead of staring at them longingly we've got more on this later so stick around for some tips on dating number three you aren't on the same emotional level there's nothing lonelier than being in a relationship and feeling alone if this is you then perhaps your partner isn't meeting your emotional needs when it comes to respect communication and matters of kindness you need to have a similar standard for things to work or at least be willing to learn to meet the other's needs there is a point when you have to take responsibility for healthy emotional responses to things and for that we can't recommend enough the importance of seeking balanced mental health but if you're a generally well-adjusted person then it's normal to require your romantic relationship to offer some emotional support perhaps you're on the other side of the equation and find it hard to engage with your partner on their level you feel like they want to go deeper more than you're used to it might be time to figure out if you need to lean in a bit more and foster a closer emotional connection with your partner if it's more about the person you're with than the action of opening up then you're with the wrong person being able to be vulnerable and honest with someone and still be loved and accepted is a beautiful thing and the basis of a happy relationship number four you don't have enough similarities or enough differences part of the fun in a relationship is being with someone you have things in common with that you can talk about and do things that interest you but at the same time it's exciting to have someone who has their own interests and activities that they enjoy doing that are so different to you it keeps things exciting lockdown isn't exactly leaving a lot of room for us to enjoy the things we usually do away from our live-in partners but for those of you not cohabitating lockdown might have really lit the fire between you as the saying goes absence makes the heart grow fonder if you're always envious of the couple at the barbecue that are still all over each other even after 10 years of being together then perhaps ask them what they did on their saturday you might find that she went rock climbing with friends and he did some gardening at home that time apart gives them new stories to tell new laughs to share and brings us closer together after time apart the other couple at the barbecue is often the pair that has nothing in common they're always arguing about the necessity of garden gnomes on the lawn and have two opposite feelings about the camping trips they take love hate doesn't really suit a long-term relationship and trying to make something fit when it just doesn't will leave your relationship sucking hard just do things together and do things apart well after covert lockdowns lift of course number five you don't make time for each other everyone is busy and time doesn't miraculously just appear for you to do cool things with your partner if you're envious over the couples always on adventures together on instagram that's because that's what they prioritize they block out plan and execute those fun times together they didn't just happen to go snorkeling on saturday because they had no responsibilities or commitments make your relationship suck a little less by starting with some small changes why don't you change up your coming home schedule try to get home at the same time and take a walk around the block before you get stuck in with supper and diy or take some time to chat to each other in the morning over coffee instead of scrolling your social feed give the other person some of your priority hours instead of your leftovers this will go a long way to show them how valuable they are number six you're addicted to drama if your relationship is more of an emotional rollercoaster than a taylor swift album then it probably sucks movies music and media paint dysfunction as the norm but in reality most of us avoid it if you or someone you date are the kind of person who finds drama wherever they turn the chaotic and emotionally draining lifestyle will probably drive you to break up this kind of relationship usually consists of fights that spiral out of control and one partner leaves to go to a friend or family members then there is a lot of texting back and forth about how you can't live without each other and then an emotional reunion these make up breakup relationships seldomly make it to the 40-year anniversary mark how do we know that well because you never hear your grandparents reminisce about all the times they broke up and reunited that's what led to their 40 golden years of marriage healthy relationships don't need parking lot blowouts to stay in love so if you're in love with a drama llama then consider tapping out and moving on and if not only your relationships suck but your friendships do too then check out our other video 15 reasons why you don't make new friends number seven you've lost the trust if your hands burn to scroll your partner's cell phone when they leave the room you've probably lost the trust this could have been because of your partner's rubbernecking ways or because you're insecure whatever the reason a relationship without trust mega sucks it's time to talk about it see if there really is something to be concerned about or if someone needs to work on their insecurities the partner also has a role to offer emotional support to show that you are loved and have nothing to be insecure about number eight you think the grass is always greener with someone else if you're in a relationship but are always on the lookout for the new exciting person then you and your partner probably aren't having the best relationship right now it's easy to think that everyone else and every other relationship is so much more exciting and easier than the one you're in but it's probably not true all of us have plenty of boring and a whole ton of everyday admin no one broadcasts these things during their first dates in fact we all try to hide the boring crazy and quirky until we're a little down the road with someone it's not a trap it's more like self-respect if you're missing those first butterflies chances are your partner is too keep watching because we have some tips to rekindle the romance coming up number nine you're too clingy there is this law of attraction acknowledging all you have so that more is automatically gifted to you and then there's the law of repulsion neediness people run a mile when someone is too needy or jealous it makes it near impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone who confines and suffocates you because they are insecure if you don't want to let your partner out of sight or grow and develop their career or interests without you then you're probably too clingy giving someone freedom makes them more attracted to you encourage your partner to see friends without you and they'll probably come home earlier than expected because they missed you healthy and fun relationships involve freedom and trust and you can't build trust with someone if they never leave your side number 10 you have unrealistic expectations of your partner if you have a picture of the perfect partner and you keep comparing your real partner to it then your relationship probably sucks no one likes to be compared to a made-up list of perfection and no one could ever live up to it either in a healthy relationship you should be safe to be imperfect dress a little sloppy get food stuck in your teeth and say the wrong thing from time to time you should both be secure and the other person's love enough to know that you're still treasured and accepted despite yourself if you constantly feel tense that you aren't saying the right things or reacting according to your partner's desired script then there'll be a growing wedge of resentment from both sides the truth is an imperfect partner in real life is so much better than dreaming up a perfect fairy tale character you will never meet number 11 you have put up walls how much of yourself are you really showing to your partner many people have put up walls because of past hurts and failed relationships and of closed access to their authentic self if this is you then your partner isn't getting the full experience of dating you your walls of protection against someone in your past are now creating distance with your new partner this will leave you emotionally unavailable or distant and cold and we already have discussed how much this sucks in short your failure to deal with your past hurt is causing you to punish your current partner for something someone else did to you in the past i'm sure we can all agree that this isn't a healthy way to tackle things and you need to work on this so your relationship will suck a lot less number 12 jealousy is the third wheel three's definitely a crowd when the third wheel is jealousy jealousy is an emotion that never endears people to you like oil and water love and jealousy just don't mix perhaps he got snubbed by a friend in a playground maybe your mom gave your sibling more affection than you whatever the cause of your jealous streak it's time to work on it and leave it out of your love life quizzing your partner on why they took a few minutes longer in the bathroom is going to make you sound totally unhinged if your partner is cheating then we hope you have the self-respect to walk away but after that we hope you take the time to work through it and figure out that being cheated on says nothing about you and everything about the cheater once you're healed you can head into your new relationship knowing that you're valuable in your own right plus jealousy wouldn't have protected you from the hurt anyway number 13 you don't want to accept change we're all ever changing every evolving beings finding someone you love doesn't mean they'll remain exactly the same forever their essence should remain the same but we should all grow and develop as we age failing to change yourself or failing to accept your partner's changes can both lead to problems in a relationship we don't mean you need to pressure each other to change the unconditional love should always be there but it's healthy to have an eagerness for self-improvement and growth and to encourage each other to grow in short keep growing and admiring change in your partner to keep your love alive number 14 you need to talk more there's often more unsaid between partners than could fill the grand canyon and this truly makes a relationship suck when what irks you is more what your partner doesn't say than what they do say then things aren't looking so great for you pal your partner should be your go-to person your confidant and your ally not your enemy you should be able to let them know what you're thinking first before your close friends your mom or the server at wendy's let them be the first person to know not the last you might be holding back because you think you're sparing your partner's feelings but not communicating with them creates more distance until you're standing on either side of a canyon of unsaid things so open up your mouth and clear those lines of communication between you number 15 you've forgotten how good dating was can you remember the good old days with your partner when you laughed and held hands and talked all night that time you watched the stars and woke up early for the sunrise you dressed up and went to a really great restaurant and ordered champagne well if covet is not the only reason you stopped going out then perhaps it's time to ask your partner on a date again there's no reason to ever stop dating your partner it's a reminder you're special to each other that you aren't just friends or roommates or parents but first and foremost you are a couple when you aren't home in your comfy pants the conversation becomes a little more interesting eyes smile brighter at each other and jokes seem funnier dates are a great reminder of why we chose the person in the first place so send your partner a text to be ready at eight grab a picnic basket and head to an open field to watch the stars together handy luxers here we are at the end of our list what made your past relationship suck and how have you improved your relationship game since then let us know in the comments and of course for sticking with us until the end here's that bonus we owe you it's a terrible shame but the big reason relationships suck is they often fail to meet your needs in this case we don't mean your partner falls short but rather when your needs are way too great basically you're looking for someone to fulfill you if being single is unbearable because you can't stand being alone and you don't feel whole without a better half then you're probably using your partner to patch up some holes within yourself in this state you'll probably find a partner just for the sake of being with someone even if they aren't a good fit and making someone else's life satisfying is a big ask to request from anyone so your partner will take a lot of strain if you expect that from them focus on self-improvement on finding happiness with yourself in your current singleness let your self-esteem build as you realize that you're more than enough to be around when you're satisfied in yourself you won't need someone else to meet any of your needs for you but rather to complement your already great life thank you for spending some time with us hey luxers make sure to like and subscribe so you never miss another video we also hand-picked these videos which we recommend you watch next you can talk to us on all social medias or ask a question on our website alux.com thank you for being an a-lexer and we'll see you back tomorrow

Channel: Alux.com

Views: 60,017

Rating: 4.9384117 out of 5

Keywords: Alux, Alux.com, Alux Youtube, fine living, bad relationship, why your relationship sucks, relationship drama, relationships fail, why your relationship is bad, relationship advice, boyfriend, girlfriend, issues with modern relationships, problems with dating, toxic relationships, relationship triangle, break off a relationship, unhealthy relationship, how to end a relationship, signs of a bad relationship, dating, dating advice, love, divorce, smart people dating

Id: IhOOL0yyODY

Length: 15min 36sec (936 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 10 2020