1 Timothy 5 • Instructions concerning widows and Elders/Pastors

first timothy chapter five open your bibles there please first timothy chapter five i got through the whole chapter in first service i'll see if i can do it in second service it's going to depend a little bit on my back i'm not back up to full strength yet i still can't taste food or smell things unless they're right up to my nose so i'm i'm and i'm over everything i mean i'm you know but that stuff can linger i've actually heard of some people who've had that that particular issue linger for a year and i'm hoping that's not the case because i really miss chocolate i mean chocolate is my friend and right now it's kind of being a little persnickety because i can't taste it doesn't mean i'm not eating it but i just can't taste it because you know what i just use my imagination you know i love spaghetti i love pizza it is a real bummer when you put those things in your mouth and it's like this is cardboard i can't taste this but but i'm just imagining how good it is so anyway enough about me let's read through the chapter here i'm reading out of the esv follow along with me as i do it says do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father younger men as brothers older women as mothers younger women as sisters in all purity honor widows who are truly widows but if a widow has children or grandchildren let them first learn to show godliness to their own household and to make some return to their parents for this is pleasing in the sight of god she who is truly a widow left all alone has set her hope on god and continues in supplications and prayers night and day but she who is self-indulgent is dead even while when while she lives command these things as well so that they may be without reproach but if anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially his for members of his household he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever let a widow be enrolled if she is not less than 60 years of age having been the wife of one husband and having a reputation for good works if she has brought up children has shown up shown hospitality has washed the feet of the saints has cared for the afflicted and has devoted herself to every good work but refuse to enroll younger widows for when their passions draw them away from christ they desire to marry and so incur condemnation for having abandoned their former faith besides that they learn to be idlers going about from house to house and not only idlers but also gossips and busybodies saying what they should not so i would have the younger widows marry bear children manage their households and give the adversary no occasion for slander for some have already strayed after satan if any believing woman has relatives who are widows let her care for them let the church not be burdened so that it may care for those who are truly widows let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor especially those who labor in preaching and teaching for the scripture says you shall not muzzle an ox while it treads out the grain and the laborer deserves his wages do not admit a charge against an elder except on the evidence of two or three witnesses as for those who persist in sin rebuke them in the presence of all so that they may stand uh so so that the rest rather may stand in fear in the presence of god and of christ jesus and of the elect angels i charge you to keep these rules without prejudging doing nothing from partiality do not be hasty in the laying on of hands or take part in the sins of others keep yourself pure no longer drink only water but use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments the sins of some people are conspicuous going before them to judgment but the sins of others appear later so also good works are conspicuous and even those that are not cannot remain hidden let's pray father god open our hearts this is your word we pray for your holy spirit to minister that word to our hearts lord give me grace and understanding and help me to clearly share these things and lord i just pray for every heart to be open to hear from you lord speak to us about the areas of our greatest need we ask it father in jesus name amen amen you know you can tell from this chapter that this is full of a lot of instruction and kind of um stuff for a young pastor who's leading a church or at least establishing a church and that sort of thing from the apostle paul and and even though you may never be a pastor or you may never be even in you know like church leadership or something like that these are good things for you to know because you are the body of christ you are the recipient of the ministry that comes from individuals like this and you know it's always good to go back to the word and say what does god expect out of a pastor and leader because you know we've foisted our own expectations on pastors and leaders over the years you know and we've come up with our own expectations but they're not necessarily biblical they may not be wrong but they're just not biblical but we place huge expectations that may or may not be part of their actual calling you know so it's it's good for us to go back and revisit the word of god and say you know what what is god's intention for a man who is called into ministry and the first two verses of this chapter give instructions to timothy concerning how he should address individuals in the church who are needing a course correction that's probably the politest way i can say it because sometimes that happens now remember timothy was a younger man so what happens when he's dealing with an older man who he recognizes kind of needs a little correction well as a younger man that can be an awkward thing to do speaking to your elder speaking to someone you know and and there is a need to be respectful about that kind of a conversation and so he begins in verse one by saying you know don't don't be harsh about the way you speak to an older man when he is needing correction rather encourage him let him know that you know in the work and power of the spirit he can do better and and so he has to the younger pastor should show that kind of respect uh to an older man and and then he's told even when it comes to younger men treat them as as brothers now i don't know if you had a brother i i did growing up and i i well i still do um and um he kind of liked to punch me a lot and uh beat me up and and stuff like that and so whenever i read this verse about treating younger men as brothers i'm like well yeah but just not like the way my brother i mean i love him today and we get along great and he's he's a good guy but and he doesn't hit me anymore which is really nice i'm very happy to say that but uh he did but you know we today we we treat each other with respect and that's what paul is talking about even though he's saying here in essence you do have a little more leeway to be a little perhaps more direct with a younger man because he's a younger man but still treat him as you would a family member with that kind of compassion and kindness that you would now when it comes to older women now what about a here's a young pastor who's addressing himself to an older woman again who's needing a course correction in her life there's something going on in her life about which he needs to confront and yet this is a challenging situation paul says treat her as if you would your own mother well that's a challenge right there huh mom i need to talk to you a little bit here you know and please don't send me to my room until i'm done but you know he he needs to respond to her with the respect and honor that an older woman is due and then he finally says when it comes to younger women treat them as you would if she were your biological sister and with all purity okay so uh there there's a there's a compassion and an understanding that is expected when we're talking to people in the body of christ and we're to treat them as family members because fundamentally that's what they are you are my brothers and sisters in jesus christ and and we're to treat one another with the kind of honor that families extend one to another now as we get into verse three and following he's going to have quite a bit to say actually here about widows and before we get into these verses i feel like i need to kind of give a little back story because paul is talking to timothy who understands how they treated widows and were the things they did for widows but we may not be aware so here's the deal you need to understand that the early church believed that it was their responsibility to take care of women whose husbands had passed on but as they got into it and began to do it over a period of time they realized that not every widow was on the same standing in other words they had to come up with guidelines and that's what paul is going to give timothy in these verses guidelines for widows and you'll notice that he begins by saying in verse 3 honor widows who are truly widows and that statement sounds dumb on the outside because it's like what do you mean it's kind of like being kind of pregnant you either are or you're not and when it comes to being a widow i mean your husband either passed away or he didn't so how can you be a truly a widow well what paul means and he's going to repeat it two more times what he means is truly needy in other words truly without any assistance or any help in other words she has no family and i i probably should tell you that in that day and age because of the fact that culturally it was very difficult for a woman to support herself if not impossible there were instances where widows who had no family starved to death okay so this was a very real issue so the church took these women uh took it upon themselves to take care of these these uh women but paul says honor the ones who are truly needy in other words they have no one and that's why he goes on to say in verse four if you look with me there but if a widow has children or perhaps even adult grandchildren let them first and here's the interesting phrase learn to show godliness guys it's godliness to take care of your family it's it's a it's a show of godliness to take care of your family members and so he says let them show godliness in their own household and then i like this phrase too and make some return to their parents for this is pleasing in the sight of god you know our parents i don't know about your parents my parents they're still alive they poured into me for so many years and now my dad's 94 my mom's 91 and my sibling and i i'm i live 1500 miles away from my parents um the rest of my siblings live pretty close so they're the ones really kind of taking care now we've gotten to the point now where my parents need to be taken care of in fact we're we're like in the next week moving them to another location because they've gotten to the point where they just they need nursing care all the time my mom bless her heart she she rolled her mobility chair over her ankle and broke it last week and yeah i know it was just it's just one of those things you know they they need they need care well it's interesting though i mean this is my mom she used to take care of me i used to sit in her lap while she comforted me you know well now we get a chance to return the investment you know that our parents have poured into our lives and this is good this is good and in fact paul says it is pleasing in the sight of god okay and if your parents aren't there yet praise the lord but they'll probably get there unless jesus comes first but you know and when and when when it happens we we we are to pour into their lives like they poured into our lives verse 5 she who is truly a widow and again this is that reference to truly needy left all alone has set her hope on god and continue continues in supplications and prayers night and day but she who is self-indulgent is dead even while she lives and then he goes on to say command these things and so forth so that there won't be any reproach on these sorts of things and what paul is doing here is he's kind of giving us in these verses a spiritual contrast if you will between two kinds of widows that he's describing he calls again the one the true widow the truly needy woman who who lives her life in complete dependence on the lord she's constantly praying waiting on the lord trusting the lord for whatever sustenance and provision that he is going to bring and yet then we see this contrast of the other woman who is true is a widow in the sense that her husband passed but her heart is not focused on the lord it is in fact self-focused and she is now living a life seeking pleasure rather than the service of the lord and and and paul says that when somebody lives their life for pleasure and that's it he says they're they're dead even while they're alive that's a strong statement isn't it but did you ever think about the fact that that just describes the world i mean that really describes pretty much everybody outside of christ you know because the world knows of no other reason to live except to meet one's needs that's it that's all there is right and they talk about self-love and selfless and self that everything is self oriented that's the way the world operates well in the body of christ we operate on the basis of being directed or focused on others rather than self-focused that's the example that jesus gave us and it's it's it's it's a sign of life when somebody lives their lives others focus it's a sign of the life that god has deposited in that person you know yeah it doesn't mean we don't struggle with self even as believers because we do we're constantly being drawn back to self we're constantly being drawn back to thinking about me and my needs and stuff but we recognize we know that in jesus he's directing us outward right again it's that sign of life that's why paul says this this woman and it doesn't have to just be a woman but this woman who is completely self-indulgent is dead even while she lives right so the the the the point of all this is for paul to give timothy some direction as it relates to the church's responsibility and he's telling us that the church has no responsibility to take care of a widow just because she's a widow if she's living a self-indulgent lifestyle does that make sense anyway he's got some more directives here concerning widows verse eight but if anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially for members of his household he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever you've probably heard this verse all on its own and it i i think it can stand all on its own i really do i i in other words i think it can stand outside its context the context though is taking care of widows that's the context but i i think that it is true that that that any man who refuses to provide for his household has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever and he says that because even unbelievers take care of their family kind of interesting taking care of family do you remember when jesus gave us an incredible example of this you guys remember jesus was the oldest son there were other children mary and joseph had other children but he was he was the oldest and there there were certain responsibilities that fell to the oldest child now remember by the time jesus was finishing his earthly ministry joseph had passed away i think he was probably a bit older than mary that's a guess but i think it's a pretty safe guess anyway jesus took care of his mother let me show you a passage from john chapter 19 up on the screen when jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby he said to his mother woman behold your son then he said to the disciple behold your mother and from that hour the disciple took her to his own home let me remind you of something jesus made this statement while hanging on a cross bearing the sins of the world took care of mom made sure that mom was going to be okay because remember at this particular point his brothers had not yet come to faith in him now they eventually did james his brother eventually not only came to faith became the pastor of the church in jerusalem and wrote a letter in the new testament jude his brother eventually came to faith in him and wrote a letter in the new testament right before the book of revelation so these guys eventually came to faith and i have no doubt about the fact that they probably took mom back from john and said this is our responsibility i have no doubt about that i don't know that for a fact but i i believe i believe that they did but this is something that is pleasing in the sight of god paul goes on now to give some further guidelines for the widow's list verse 9 let a widow be enrolled if she's not less than 60 years of age having and then he lists these various things been the you know she's been a faithful wife and that's what it means by the way when it says having been the wife of one husband it's saying having been a faithful wife known for her acts of service you know faithful and good mother known for showing hospitality uh devoting to good works etc etc and these were the things and paul said these are the guidelines we're going to put into place and and if a woman frankly doesn't meet up with these guidelines then you know this is going to be a different sort of a situation now let me let me just pause for a second and i'm going to i'm going to do something i don't do very often i'm going to speculate i i honestly don't like speculation a whole lot but i'm going to speculate that there were some people who didn't like paul's guidelines in other words i'm assuming timothy probably you know passed these along to the church i'm assuming there were people in the church who were like guidelines for taking care of widows really we have to have guidelines there are there are i even know the kind of people who i'll bet opposed these guidelines i'll tell you and that doesn't mean they're bad people but i can tell you the kind of people they were they were people with the gift of compassion and the gift of mercy because people who have the gift of compassion and mercy a hate guidelines and two can't say no to anybody did i go a and two not good they they literally can't say no so if i was reading through these guidelines and you were bristling a little bit just kind of on the inside you may have just discovered your spiritual gift because that's why we don't put people with the gift of compassion and mercy in administrative positions because they'd sell the farm in a day it's just because they're just all about just giving away sort of a thing but there has to be guidelines because there has to be an organizational structure and there needs to be wisdom and there needs to be equality and fairness and that sort of thing and that's why these things are being passed along uh so for those of you that are just com uncomfortable with this whole guideline thing i'm sorry to say your pain isn't quite over verse 11 he goes on a little bit here he says but refuse to enroll younger widows this is where people really start kind of getting emotional refuse refuse a widow refuse to enroll he says younger widows for when their passions draw them away from christ they desire to marry and so incur condemnation for having abandoned their former faith now stop there lest you think paul is being kind of an ogre here i need to explain a little something about how they enrolled widows you know because you read these words and it makes it sound like if she was receiving support from the church and then decided to get married she's condemned well that's not really what paul's saying what paul isn't telling you because he doesn't really feel like he had to tell you because the person to whom he was writing already knew all this but what he's not telling you is that when a widow met those qualifications when a widow came under the protection and provision of the church she made a pledge for the rest of her life she basically said my my husband is with the lord and i am devoting the remainder of my years on this earth to the service of the saints and she would make this pledge to god okay so she was basically pledging herself as a with a lifelong commitment to the body of christ to live this way and because she made that pledge the church said all right we're going to take care of you we're going to we're going to see to your needs and so forth because otherwise you know you're you're free to go remarry or or whatever the case might be you see so when a woman made that kind of a pledge and then went back on it paul considered that a big deal and she he because she's making a promise to god and then breaking it and again for to paul that's a serious thing and you know he had seen some some wives or widows i should say who had been embraced by the church and then they began to live lives that were inconsistent with servants who had given or devoted themselves to the lord that's what he goes on to say in in in 13 through 15. look there in your bible he says you know besides that you know they they learn to be idlers that means they they learn to kind of be idle because you know they've got time on their hands going about from house to house and not only just idlers he says but then they start engaging in gossip did you hear about so-and-so i can't believe it do you know what she told me and on and on and on and he said these are things they shouldn't be saying so he says in verse 14 i would have younger widows marry nothing wrong with that bear children manage their households give the adversary no occasion for slander and then he makes a rather serious charge in verse 15 saying that some have already strayed after satan and personally i don't think paul's talking about a woman necessarily leaving the faith i think he's talking about here a woman whose goals and desires have become so directed by the world that they're no longer focused on the concerns and desires of the kingdom of god in other words satan has kind of just captivated their attention it doesn't mean that they're no longer a believer you guys do know that believers can even get captivated by the enemy right yeah yeah we're not immune to those sorts of things so anyway uh he he gives then a final word on widows in verse 16 saying if any believing woman has relatives who are widows let her care for them let the church not be burdened so that it may care for those who are truly in need truly have nobody else to take care of them so there's a real responsibility of family here that we see in these passages family family family families take care of families it's it's sad in our culture that we live in a culture where families are often estranged you know we've had many calls come into the church office people seeking help and one of the things we try to ask is well do you have any family in the area often they do but they are so they've burned so many bridges and they're so estranged from their family that there's no one they can count on there's no one that they can turn to in their family well yeah my mom lives over in nampa i got a brother in emmett i got a sister over in boise well can they help you they don't even talk to me you know that's what sin does to families but now we turn on turn to elders in verse 17 and as we as we talk about elders here can i remind you that elder and pastor and overseer are synonymous terms okay elder pastor we've talked about this a lot in the past and overseer are used synonymously in the bible so we're talking about a pastor elder overseer here we go let the elders who rule or lead well be considered worthy of double honor especially those who labor in preaching and teaching and then paul explains what he means by double honor for the scripture says you shall not muzzle an ox while it treads out the grain quote from deuteronomy there and the laborer deserves his wages all right what's paul talking about here it's an honor for a man to rise up into position of leadership within the church it is a double honor when he then receives support from the church and he says that this double honor ought to go for those whose primary focus is preaching and teaching and then he gives a scripture from the old testament saying for the scripture even tells us don't muzzle the ox while it's treading out the grain they used to hook oxen up to these two arms of of this grind mill and they would have them literally just go around in a circle and they would grind the grain into a you know powder like flour and he says you know in the old testament god said don't put a muzzle on the ox he's working for you so let him eat he needs to have his strength sufficient to be able to do the work that you're asking him to do right that makes sense well paul says this applies to church leaders where does he say that well he actually talks about the same thing in first corinthians let me show you on the screen first corinthians chapter 9 he says first he starts off with asking rhetorical questions who serves as a soldier at his own expense right wouldn't that be weird you need to come fight for your country oh bring your gun who plants a vineyard without eating any of its fruit who tends a flock without getting some of the milk do i say these things on human authority does not the law say the same for is written in the law of moses here's that quote again you shall not muzzle an ox while it treads out the grain it is is it for oxen that god is concerned does he not certainly speak for our sake it was written for our sake because the plow man should plow in hope and the thresher thresh in hope of sharing in the crop he says if we have sown spiritual things among you is it too much if we reap material things from you by the way paul wrote this to the corinthians but he didn't accept a dime from them he said i won't take any of your money but i have a right to i have a right to but i'm not going to do it because i really like bragging on the lord you know well so we're talking about support here we're talking about we've been talking about supporting widows now we're talking about supporting those in the ministry and this is a little awkward i'm standing up here teaching this passage and yet i'm the recipient of support you know from the local church may i say one thing about supporting a pastor and i think this is an important distinction churches don't pay well okay let me i'll bring it down to our church okay our church does not pay me to do what i do okay it it i receive support from the church so that i am free to do what i do and that that is a distinction because you see before i was in the ministry i worked in radio most of you know that and i did it for a number of years and i came for my board shift i was a i was a radio announcer on air personality and and i did my radio shift usually about four hours long and then i would be done and then after two weeks i'd get a paycheck and they'd say you worked here's your pay for working on the radio thank you very much that's not the way it works in the ministry i was an employee of the radio station i am not an employee of the church i am a servant of god and as such i receive support from the church to free me up to not have to work outside the church so i can devote my time to doing what i'm doing do you understand do you understand the difference that makes as it relates to understanding how we see pastors because do you remember what jesus said about employees he called them hirelings and even talked about shepherds who were hired and he said the hireling cares nothing for the sheep something comes along to threaten the flock he's like i'm out of here i'm not going to risk my life these aren't my sheep i'm just i just i'm here just to make some money he's gone right the good shepherd he said lays down his life for the sheep now i understand that's talking about jesus ultimately but that's the example that he gives to every pastor slash shepherd you are not an employee you're not a hireling and if necessary lay down your life so there's a different relationship that's going on here as it relates to support all right now as we look at verses 19 and 20 paul once again revisits kind of the idea of the example of the pastor overseer elder he starts by saying don't admit a charge i think the niv says don't entertain a charge against or an accusation against an elder except on the evidence of two or three witnesses it's just too easy for someone to make a false accusation against you know and the enemy is good at that so he says hey just be careful that it comes from more than one source but there are times when those accusations are true how are you going to deal with that verse 20 and for those who persist in sin now those you guys is not talking about the general body of christ it's talking about pastors elders overseers for those who persist in sin rebuke them in the presence of all so that they so that the rest may stand in fear this is the interesting thing about a pastor elder overseer he's an example to the body of christ in righteousness and unrighteousness he is in his life is an example in righteousness the rebuke on his life if he persists in sin is an example to the body of christ if he persists in sin so he i don't know how many of you want to sign up to be a pastor now but he's basically saying if you if you're going to mess up if you're going to be an example to the body of christ then your failures will be an example to them as well this is not saying that every time somebody persists in sin we shout it from the rooftops in the church or we tell the body of christ this is talking about leaders here that's the context how we treat leaders and so a leader needs to understand i am an example to the flock and if i begin to give way to sin i will still be an example to the flock an example of what not to do an example of yeah there you go now those are hard things to hear aren't they can you imagine timothy he's receiving this from paul and and it's very hard to hear but that's why he says in verse 21 in the presence of god and of christ jesus and of the elect angels i charge you to keep these rules first of all without prejudging don't prejudge a man don't prejudge a man and also don't don't respond out of partiality to that man just because you like him don't prejudge him because you don't like him and don't operate out of partiality because you do like him don't let your personal views come into play when it comes to sin it has to be dealt the standard must be the same and then paul goes on to give what i believe is one of the wisest things to do to avoid the possibility of problems with pastors and leaders falling into sin look at verse 22 he says do not be hasty in the laying on of hands nor take part in the sins of others keep yourself pure this is a great verse you want to avoid the pain and drama that comes with a a church leader falling into sin he says wait and don't be too quick to lay hands you know when i'm talking to a young men who are just starting a church i know what they're going through when you're in those early days of a church and you have about 10 to 12 people coming on a sunday and you're doing everything i mean when you're starting a church you are chief cook and bottle washer you do everything and you really long for people to come alongside and help and there's a great temptation when someone walks through the door and they look reasonably healthy and you have every reason to believe they're a genuine christian to say why don't you come alongside me you know without giving time to that process and i believe personally one of the reasons you see churches get into turmoil and that even result in church splits is because leaders were not vetted properly and they just didn't give enough time to see what was a guy's life is like you know so he says don't lay hands too quickly take your time that's what i tell young pastors go slow i tell them listen if you have to wait 10 years before you raise up an elder big deal better that than raising up someone who is just a thorn under your saddle anyway verse 23 paul stops kind of makes a parenthetical statement just personally to timothy he says no longer drink only water but use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments we've heard this verse a lot of times um you've heard me say that back during biblical times good drinking water was tough to come by and it was full of bacteria although they didn't know that do you guys know that we didn't discover bacteria until the 1600s and it was sometime late in the 1600s somebody kind of got the idea i think we ought to boil this and we can kill this bacteria here and it worked people weren't getting having all those nasty intestinal issues that went along with drinking bacteria laden water well you know sometimes bacteria gets into water and it can cause all those problems and timothy was a man who drank only water and it was kind of playing havoc with his digestive tract and so paul says take a little wine some people think that he was he was prescribing a medicinal sort of a thing it wasn't it wasn't medicine he was simply people drank wine because there wasn't good water and the fermentation process did kill bacteria and so you know he he's telling him you know we've kind of noticed over the years that people who drink some wine don't have as many intestinal issues again they didn't know it was about bacteria at that point but so he's simply telling him you know today we'd say if there was a problem with the water we'd say boil the water or get a really good filtration system they didn't have those things so take a little wine and then we come to these interesting final two verses of the chapter where paul is now thinking back on this whole idea of raising up someone too quickly laying hands too quickly he says the sins of some people are conspicuous you can see it in the way they walk or you can smell it on their breath i threw that in there going before them to judgment but the sins of others appear later so also good works by the same token here can be conspicuous and and even those he says that are not cannot remain hidden so what the bottom line of what paul is saying here is that before you raise up somebody into a position of church leadership get to know them i mean it sounds like a really smart thing to do but you'd be shocked how many times we don't just get to know them get to know the kind of people they are get to know how they respond in different circumstances and situations you know there's a lot of ways that people can look very righteous until somebody gets in their face and calls them all kinds of names you know spits at them or smacks them or something like that and all of a sudden boy i tell you the flesh rises up well you know you don't know those things sometimes at the beginning and that's what he's saying here some people's personal weaknesses might not be revealed for quite some time after you get to know them but know this wait long enough and eventually all of our weaknesses come out you know so he's basically just kind of talking about that and and making the point that even when it comes to good works some people's good works are kind of just out there for you know everybody to see in others or doing things in a hidden sort of a way for others not to see even though god does and they will not remain hidden forever we'll stop there pick it up in chapter 6 next time i did it we did it we got through one whole chapter praise the lord let's stand together if we could please we're going to have some people down front here to pray with you if you have some prayer needs that you want to lift before the lord i'm just really glad everybody's here today it's good seeing you guys it's good seeing smiling faces father thank you so much for your word thank you for the instruction for the insight for the understanding that your word gives us lord we see that the early church was a church that was devoted to compassion and kindness and and i pray father that we would carry that on that we would be people of compassion people filled with loving kindness toward others a desire to help and be a blessing and lord i thank you for the insights that you've given us here today on church leadership pastors elders overseers so that the whole body of christ can be in a place of understanding i thank you my father and i pray for your holy spirit to continue to teach us even as we go from this place for we ask it in jesus name amen you

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Published: Sun Sep 12 2021